Hope Remains
by dazzledlight
Summary: Post 1x13. So her life was on the line after hurling over and over again in that porcelain bowl of hers. So she couldn't stop. She felt lost. What should she do now? And why did he have to keep showing up whenever she didn't want him to? Chuck&Blair.
1. Chapter 1: Dying

**A/N:** My first Gossip Girl fic! Please be kind and review please :D

Post 1x13. Chuck&Blair. I hate Nate and Jenny the most in the show.

I don't own anything or anyone from Gossip Girl. (Though I wish). Haha.

* * *

_Bulimia._

The faucet water was running. _Again._

_Bulimia._

How could things get so out of control? Why did it have to be this way? She was stronger than this, she knew that.

_But she really wasn't. _

And so here she was again, Blair Waldorf, dethroned Queen of the Upper East Side, locked in her own bathroom, the faucet water running, her finger sticking down her throat, tears streaming. _Almost there._

_Bulimia._

How could they do this to her? Right. Because she was the absolute _bitch _of the world, they just had to give her what was coming to her. They don't understand. They're all selfish as much as she is. They don't care.

_Nobody does._

Not even _him. _

The contents of stomach floated inside the porcelain toilet bowl, but she wouldn't stop there. She watched for awhile before she stuck her finger in her throat, forcing her stomach's contents to get out, _there was hardly anything left, _forcing her life to get back to normal. Although she knows no matter how much she's thrown up, it won't change a thing.

_Nothing will ever be the same again._

_Bulimia. _

She could understand what and why he _did _it. She would do the same if she was placed in his position. Of course. That's what they do. They're manipulative, cunning and merciless, even if was towards each other. So she could understand. Given the amount of time she was able to think about all the things that had happened, she'd begun to see his side. And she was willingly to apologize. To forgive and forget and just move on.

But he didn't want that.

His words. _His words _were the most painful. Never mind that she and Serena had an earlier falling out, they always had a falling out and they always got back together. Serena was the one that always saved her. Never mind that Little J, _that absolute bitch, _thought she was far more superior than her, Blair Waldorf. Never mind that Nate said that he'd never want to see or do anything with her again.

_He _was the one that hurt her the most.

And even if Serena saved her, and would save her, countless and countless of times thereafter, she was locked up in her own bathroom, because of _him. _Her second best friend. Her second love. Her first everything.

_Rode hard and put away wet. _

And that line, along with his other painfully used lines, _I don't want you anymore,_ made her shove her little fingers in her throat and force anything inside of her to come out and down into that toilet bowl.

It was like that every night now.

One month, two weeks and forty-five days. _It felt like forever._

It was like that every night since that fateful night at the bar and no one even knew about it. Not her mother or father.

_Not even Serena. _

She would only stop when black or white circles would start clouding her vision.

They made her afraid. _Every time. _She never had them before.

She knew she should confess to her best friend, _her beautiful, thin and golden friend and sister. _But she couldn't stand seeing the look of disappointment and pity that would be written in her friend's eyes if she'd ever confess about her new habit. They had been talking about fighting back and getting through the day together and making it back on top, _together._ If she confessed this, she wouldn't have a _'together' _anymore. She wouldn't dare want to lose another friend. She wouldn't dare want to risk hearing what _Serena _would have say about her.

_She was afraid. _She always was ever since that night at the bar.

In the back of her mind, she wondered if she should go see a doctor or something because the black and white circles weren't really normal.

_Bulimia. _

_None of this was normal. _

She flushed the contents at last and looked at herself at the mirror. Chuck was right. She wasn't beautiful anymore. _She never was._

_When you were beautiful, delicate and untouched..._

More hot tears streamed down her face. It was nights like these when the crying and sobbing would never subside until she fell asleep, when she contemplated suicide because that would be the very thing that would end all of it. _All this pain. _

_Wasn't bulimia close to that already?_

When she felt completely alone, afraid and _dirty._

And Chuck was right.

Because with feelings like these, yes, she would never be beautiful, not now and never again.

She couldn't stand it anymore, looking at herself and so she splashed water her face, making her vision blurry from her reflection. She didn't want to even glance at it anymore. Blair then finally unlocked her bathroom door and started heading towards the comforts of her bed, her body suddenly craving for its warmth.

Her head was spinning, she was dizzy. The black and white circles obstructing her vision of her bed. That was strange. But she didn't mind it. This was a usual thing after her night's activities in her bathroom.

It felt like forever before she finally reached her bed and as soon as she did she collapsed, all of her vision darkened.

When she would wake up, she would never realize that she actually lost consciousness and it wasn't just a mere case of extreme sleepiness and exhaustion. She would never realize that her nightly actions were slowly taking a toll on her. She'd never know. Like how nobody knew her current situation now.

_Bulimia. _

Her days were numbered if she kept this routine on.

* * *

So one day she woke up and decided to go visit a doctor.

Not the family's doctor because then her mother would know what was going on and she couldn't have that. Not a public doctor because Gossip Girl was always on alert and even if she was dethroned, oh boy, would they love a juicy story about how the dethroned Queen was visiting the hospital. Oh they'd have a field day. _She's pregnant, she's about to enter rehab, she's crazy, she's sick, she's probably there to open her legs for another doctor. _Ugh. And the list would go on and on. She didn't any of that right now.

So it was a private doctor still, just not her private doctor, hidden in the very corners of the city, in an old building no one would ever want to be spotted going to. It was a small clinic with all the facilities a real hospital would have. Not that this wasn't real at all.

Blair was sitting in one of the chairs in the waiting room. She didn't mind the wait. She wanted to prolong this meeting as much as possible. She didn't even understand what possessed her to actually come to this morbid place. White walls, white chairs, white clothing, white everything. It made her sick and she just wanted to bolt into the nearest bathroom and just puke all her sickness out.

_Voila. _And then she remembered why she was here again.

Last night, she'd done her routine again, crying and puking with the black and white circles. And then she slept to find herself waking up still in the bathroom, the contents of stomach all over her and…

_Blood._

That was new. That made her afraid enough to come running all the here in this God-forsaken clinic, canceling all plans she had with Serena. She realized three things that morning.

One. She fainted and fell asleep on her bathroom floor and didn't even know it.

Two. She puked or coughed or whatever, blood. _Her blood. _

Three. She was worried about what was happening to her.

And that's how she ended up here, in this dreadful place. How she wished Serena would be here by her side, Serena always knew how to make her forget things like this dreary place, the extent of her sickness and all her feelings of worthlessness and pain.

She took out her phone and considered calling Serena, skimming through her contacts list her best friend's name, completely ignoring Gossip Girl's latest post about the new uprising Queen Jenny.

For the love of God, she seriously did not understand why people actually liked and followed that pathetic little bitch. She didn't and neither did Serena, Jenny's petty actions and words to her on the day of her downfall completely turning off the golden princess and seeing her for who she really is. Even Dan was ignoring her. And what hurt Dan the most was how Jenny didn't really care whether Dan talked to her or not. She had her own clique now. She didn't need her brother. He had Serena anyway and now Blair since she was out of the game. Blair actually felt sorry for Dan. She always thought Jenny was a little bitch who could never be trusted. Kissing Nate, talking down to her, and throwing away her one brother? Brother, who would go out of his way to protect his little sister, even if it was coming face-to-face with Chuck himself.

_Chuck._

Strange how her fingers had stop at the name of her old friend. _The traitor. The lover. The killer. The best friend. _Briefly, all her feelings of anger and humiliation towards Chuck disappeared and she wondered how he was doing. How _he _was dealing with all of this. Was he in speaking terms with Nate? Was he okay? Was he drinking again? Or fucking someone around to forget it all?

_Am I crazy?! _Blair screamed to herself.

Apparently this whole dethroning thing and hanging out with Cabbage Patch a lot more, was slowly turning her into a softie. Showing concern for Chuck, the main reason as to why she was here. Throw in Nate as well and we have a winner. God, what the - ?

And then, she did the craziest thing she could ever do. At least for today.

She pressed the CALL button.

Her eyes widened and her heart hammered in fear and trepidation as she heard it ring. _Oh my God._ What was she doing?! Gosh. Who knew that waiting in a place as simple as a hidden clinic would evoke her to do even more _crazy _actions. Yup. She definitely was at the right place...Next stop, rehab.

She was about to cancel the ridiculous, spur of the moment call when,

"Hello?"

_Oh my God. _He answered! Chuck answered her call! So many things were running through her mind the moment she heard his deep voice. She missed him so. And even if he had said those things, she definitely missed their moments together, as friend or lover.

"Hello…."

He was getting impatient and she knew it. She could always read through him, even without seeing each other.

She definitely knew she should say something but no words could leave her mouth at the moment. Another strange thing. This has _never _happened before. At least not on phone. _Shit._

"Blair?..."

Chuck said, his voice softening over the phone. Briefly, she wondered what he was thinking at that moment.

She was about to respond, she wanted to talk to him so much, wanted to tell him everything and where she is right now. Gone were the thoughts of Serena being by her side, to be replaced with Chuck. She missed him! She missed her old friend, her old friend before the limo scene, before the Debutante Ball, before the destruction of one another.

"Miss Waldorf?"

And then she came crashing back to reality. Back to this little clinic. She wanted to cry suddenly. She looked back at the nurse waiting for her and she just nodded, indicating that she'll follow in awhile. She had to forget Chuck. This was stupid and crazy.

"Sorry…Wrong call…" She blabbered then quickly hung up so no questions would need to be asked on his side of town. She got up and rushed to follow the nurse, forcing herself to forget about her strange impulses and concentrate at the task at hand.

She really hated being in this place.

* * *

"Miss Waldorf, we've reviewed your medical conditions and I have to explain to you that right now you're in the most critical condition ever."

The doctor was saying and Blair did not expect this bad news. She was here for a check up and now he's claiming that she is in some critical condition?

"What are you saying?"

Her voice sounded weak and afraid, even to her.

"You are apparently diagnosed with the chronic illness, Bulimia Nervosa and I've seen your previous medical records and I hear you've been having this same problem for quite awhile now, am I right?"

Blair just nodded.

"And it hasn't stopped, even after you've had treatment?"

She hated this but nonetheless answered in her same weak voice.

"It did. It did. But a lot of things are happening in my life now, things which I don't wish to elaborate on, have caused me to continue _this…"_

The doctor nodded, as if understanding. He was writing in his pad now.

She watched as he wrote whatever he wrote. It made her feel as if she was being judged.

She _hated _that feeling more than ever.

"Are you experiencing a lot of stress and depression lately? And they make you do this?"

Blair just nodded again.

"When do you usually binge, Miss Waldorf?"

It took a moment for Blair to answer. "Every night now."

The doctor suddenly had a grave look on his face, his pad now kept away. He was looking at her with deep and warning eyes.

"Miss Waldorf, you must listen to me very carefully. You must not interrupt me." She just nodded once more. And suddenly Blair felt like a child, so afraid for her life. What was he going to say?

"Your bulimia has become an obsession to you, like how a person has an addiction to drugs. You must understand that your recurring binging is now slowly causing destruction to your body. You've been dehydrating yourself without even realizing it and that can explain the black and white circles and fainting you've mentioned earlier.

"You also have electrolyte imbalances within your body now which causes serious medical complication like cardiac arrest or brain damage. The blood you've also mentioned was due to what you have acquired now which is gastro esophageal reflux disease or GERD. It's a chronic symptom or musocal damage produced by the abnormal reflux in the esophagus."

Blair felt like crying. She didn't understand half the things he said but she knows it was serious and bad…and dear Lord, she seriously should have just brought in Serena with her.

"…Later on you might be experiencing heartburn. It's a major symptom of acid in the esophagus, characterized by the burning discomfort of the breastbone. You would be having either esophagitis, inflammatory changes in the esophageal lining, strictures, difficulty in swallowing and chronic chest pain. Patients diagnosed with GERD may not have all what I've mentioned. Because of your initial illness, bulimia, you've developed even more diseases like GERD and your electrolyte imbalances.

"Another thing I've discovered in our earlier examination was that you've developed peptic ulcer, an ulcer in the gastrointestinal tact that is usually acidic and thus extremely painful. It has been brewing in there for awhile now. This again, also explains the blood that you've been coughing earlier this morning. Gastrointestinal bleeding is the most common complication. And sudden large bleeding can be life threatening…"

Blair was droning out on the words of her doctor…She didn't understand what was going on. She didn't understand what he was telling her! She suddenly let the tears fall and she covered her eyes in humiliation. She had never broken down in front of a stranger before.

"I'm so sorry…It's just…" She didn't know what to say next. Was she going to die? She felt so afraid. Even with the doctor's hand on her arm, trying to give her comfort made her feel so cold. She shouldn't have come here at all.

She gave herself a moment and then wiped away her tears. She was not going to be a crybaby right now. Serena said to be strong and that was what she going to do.

And so she asked in a brave voice,

"So what's going to happen to me?"

The doctor looked at her for a moment before he sighed and answered gravely.

"Miss Waldorf, I'm sorry for saying this but if this goes on, if your bulimia doesn't get fully treated, then you may have heart failure which could cause your death. If not through heart failure, then it's either your ulcer that can kill you or the gastric rupture that will happen if you don't stop. A lot of things could happen in time if this doesn't stop, if this still goes on every night."

"What else?" Blair dared ask.

"Lung collapse, internal bleeding, stroke, kidney failure, liver failure, pancreatitis, depression and even…suicide. Of course, only one of the mentioned would be the cause of your death but as of now, we can see that you might be nearing to a heart failure or a gastric rupture."

Tear streamed down her face at thought of her own self dying. She didn't realize the extent of her actions.

_Bulimia. _

And suddenly it wasn't just Chuck's fault why this was happening to her. Her bulimia started long before he did. Her bulimia started with her mother and father, then Nate, then Serena, then Nate AND Serena, back to her parents and Nate and then at last, Chuck, the least person she'd thought to make her binge.

She was going to die because of all of them.

Would they even care? She wondered.

Maybe Serena. But then she'll forget Blair because Serena has Dan.

She was meant to die alone.

_Everything is falling apart._

_Bulimia._

_Then rebuild it. Fight. _Serena's words stronger than ever in her head.

She didn't want to die. She was too young. She didn't want to die because her heart failed her or her stomach ruptured or something.

"I don't want to die."

The doctor looked at her with pitying eyes, used to this line echoed countless of times by his previous patients.

"Stabilizing a person's physical condition will be the immediate goal if the individual is in a life-threatening state, which is what you are currently in. I will give you several medications that you must take at the exact time I give them to one. One is an anti-depressant, one is for your heart and another for the ulcer. Of course, by taking these medications nothing is final and none of this will cure by tomorrow.

"I will be giving you nutrition dietary, where everyday you take in something healthy and something that will make you feel good about yourself, meaning it won't make you fat, again at _certain _times during the day. You must follow them succinctly, Miss Waldorf or all your medications will be for nothing."

Blair just nodded fervently, taking it all in, willing to do anything to keep herself 6 feet below the ground.

"Every week you must come back here for consultation and updates and I will be your new personal clinical psychologist. Leading a physically and emotionally life is your main goal now, Miss Waldorf. And patience is a vital part in your recovery process. You have to make an effort or you will end up hospitalized."

"I understand." She did. She'd follow her doctor, Doctor Wayne or something or other, she'd get to know that later. She did _not_ want to die. She was going to make all the effort to make herself better.

Her doctor gave her list of medications and she stood up to go.

"Thank you." Blair said sincerely to him, tears glistening once again in her eyes.

Doctor Wayne just nodded.

She slowly headed out of the door before he gave her one last warning.

"Miss Waldorf."

She stopped.

"You must never leave your house without your medication. No matter what happens, no matter what the occasion, you must always have them with you, ready to be taken at the exact times I've given you."

"I understand." Blair responded.

And with that she finally left.

And when she finally stepped out of the building, she finally breathed a great sigh of relief.

She didn't know how she felt at that moment.

She was dying. And no one even knew that. Not her parents.

_Not even Serena. _

She'd fight it, of course. But what if it wasn't enough?

She was so, so afraid. She'd lost control so many times. How could she assure to herself that she could do this on her own?

* * *

She walked throughout the rest of the afternoon and finally she found herself standing on the steps of the Palace hotel.

_Serena. _

Blair would never tell her best friend her situation right now. But Serena always knew how to make her feel better. She needed her best friend more than ever now.

And so she ended up now standing in front Serena's suite, knocking and waiting for her golden sister to answer. Her eyes were puffed and red and she knew she looked like a total mess but Serena would make it better, if only it didn't take her so long to answer the damn door.

"Blair! Dear, what a pleasant surprise! We were just having a family dinner but oh! You're welcome to join us!"

Well at least it was the golden mother, Lily Vander Woodsen who greeted her. Blair just smiled gratefully in return.

"Is Serena around?"

"Yes, she's here. I'm sure she'd love to see you. Chuck too."

Blair froze. _What?_

But before anything else could register in her brain, Lily linked her arm with hers and dragged her to the dining room, where yes, they were having their_ family_ dinner. Except apparently it was the _entire _VanderBass _family_. Serena, Erik, Lily, Bart Bass and _Chuck. _

_Holy shit. _

"Blair!" Serena exclaimed happily, always in delight when seeing her best friend, especially now when this family dinner was just a total nightmare. She got up and ran to her best friend, hugging the little petite brunette in greeting. "What are you doing here? I'm so glad you came!"

Chuck looked up from his plate and gazed at the newcomer, watching her from a distance. He'd rather not see her or be in close proximity with her, of course. He'd definitely take up on that Scotch he was planning later that evening and maybe Cindy, that girl at the bar last night who giving him hints that she'd be there again tonight just for him.

"You're welcome to join us, Blair." His father spoke up from his position. Chuck definitely did not want that.

"Thank you, Mr. Bass." Blair said gratefully to Chuck's father. There was something different about her today, Chuck observed. And he was curious to what that something is.

"But is it alright if I steal Serena for just a moment? I would just like to have a word with her, please." Her eyes were glistening. What the hell happened? Chuck wondered.

"Of course." Bart permitted at once. And that was all Blair needed to hear to drag Serena to the other room, the living room, away from the people, away from Chuck.

"Blair, what's up?"

Serena asked, when they were quite away for anyone to hear their conversation, but their presence still visible to the people eating in the dining room.

Suddenly, Blair was so tempted to confess and tell everything to her friend. She couldn't do this alone, she knew, not even if she tried and all her feelings of fear and death crept through her. And she didn't know what to do anymore…

"Blair, what's wrong?"

Serena sensed something was definitely up. She finally noticed the puffed eyes of her friends' and her disheveled hair and clothes. If it had anything to do with a certain brunette ass in the other room, she'd definitely do something about it.

"Is it Chuck again? What did he do?"

Blair shook her head and finally broke down to Serena.

Serena took her in her arms at once, trying to soothe her nerves, comforting her.

"I'm so scared, Serena. I've never been this scared my entire life. Please…Please let me stay here…I really don't know what to do anymore."

She was sobbing. Blair barely sobbed. And her sobs reached the other room, where other occupants had heard her sob and looked about to see what was the commotion all about. Chuck furrowed his brows worriedly. _What happened?_

"Ssh. Blair. Everything will be alright."

"No. NO! You don't understand. You have no idea… I can't tell you but I want to because I don't want to go through this alone."

"You don't need to be alone, Blair. I'm here, remember? I'll always be here."

_But I won't. _

Blair's thoughts made her even sob more.

She had stayed over that evening. With worried looks from Lily, Bart and Eric, Chuck skulking, watching the tearful brunette in the arms of his step-sister from a corner and Serena's hand stroking Blair's hair until she finally fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.

One that she hadn't had in a long time now.

_Bulimia._

None of them even realized she was slowly dying.

* * *

_To be continued..._

**A/N: **Reviews please! It's my first GG fic. Uhm, the whole medical part is kinda mixed up because there really are alot of complications when bulimia is prolonged or given no treatment or continuous. Alot really can happen. I just got the big parts and connected them. They are quite possible to have at the same time I think.

The doctor part really sucked, I'm so sorry. But you get the gist. hahaa.

So. Please review! Eventual Chuck and Blair I promise! haha.


	2. Chapter 2: Morning Nightmares

**A/N: WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! THOSE WHO DO NOT LIKE SPOILERS DO NOT READ THIS CHAPTER. YOU CAN SKIP IT AND READ THE NEXT ONE (WHICH IS SOMETHING OF MY OWN, WAY, WAY, WAYYY PAST THE SPOILERS). **

**I REPEAT! DO NOT BOTHER READING THIS CHAPTER IF YOU DON'T WISH TO READ ANY SPOILERS FOR THE UPCOMING EPISODES THIS COMING APRIL.**

So I was bored and decided to visit a few of my Gossip Girl fan sites and voila! Spoilers for next episodes in April. Well at least just A LOT of pictures.

So since there were a lot of pictures, one idea led to another…and so, I just wanted to have a drabble at it. **DON'T READ THIS IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING FOR NEXT MONTH'S EPISODES**.

This could be taken like a separate chapter or something. I promise I shall upload the next chapter within another day or two.

Besides this is just me trying to piece the pictures together, it may or may not happen. If it does, oh God am I a genius. But please, don't hate me. I just wanted to have a drabble at it. I swear. Next chapter, I promise no spoilers, all me, and you can all still relate to it even if you haven't read this chapter.

It's a drabble so it means it's gonna suck, so don't bother! Haha. I discourage you from reading spoilers!

Btw,**THANK YOU SO MUCH **for your wonderful reviews! I feel so overwhelmed that you all liked the first chapter! Thank you, thank you thank you! Hopefully I can keep it up and make it more interesting to you guys. Thank you so much. And remember, if you don't want to read this chapter, **DONT. **HAHA. thank you:D

* * *

_The rain was pouring in all of New York City, spreading a cold and gloomy ambiance the entire city could not escape from. _

_The clouds were of a dark grey; thunders roared among the skies…The rain heavier than ever, terrifying because of its gloom. People weren't used to things like that. Well...they were, they just liked to pretend they weren't. It was a storm alright, strong enough to scare those people away, making them hide in their cozy homes and bask in its warmth._

_One couple though seemed to not be frightened away by the storm's angry cries._

_A sole cab breezed through the lonely streets of New York, the coldness from the outside drifting within. Absolute silence ensued in the cab._

_Blair Waldorf sat in that cab, hair tied up, clad in a beige trench coat, looking high and mighty from where she sat, although deep inside she felt like exploding. She was in denial, always in denial. And that was why she could never, ever make her eyes move to the man seated beside her. Not a single glance. It was like he was never even there for her at the moment. Invisible. A ghost._

_Nate Archibald just stared back at his companion in disbelief. Unbelievable really! How could she -? Whatever. If she wouldn't even step up to him, then he was giving up. He was fed up. He couldn't stand being in the same cab, let alone stay in such a close proximity with her. He pulled out his money and shoved it into the driver's hand, commanding him to stop. _

_Blair finally took notice of him._

_She glanced up slightlyas he made himself get out of the cab, and out into the pouring rain. Her eyes avoided his as he gave her his final word. _

"_You know what's wrong with you? Miss…Whoever you are." Nate began sarcastically. "You're chicken. You've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say 'Okay. Life's a fact.' People do fall in love. People do belong to each other. Because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness."_

_His words were obviously getting to her but she continued to ignore it. No. She wouldn't go down that road again. She wouldn't give in. Never again. She'd been burned already. And she will not be burned again. No. _

"_You call yourself a free-spirit, a wild thing. And you're terrified somebody's gonna stick you in a cage!" Nate continued drilling on the frigid woman inside the cab. "Well baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself." He accused. How dare he? But she was slowly breaking because yes. He was right. _

_Nate…_

"_And it's wherever you go. Coz no matter where you run, you just stand up running into yourself."_

_She continued to act as if his words didn't mean a thing to her and that was the last straw. With anger and hurt all in one, he said, "Here. I've been carrying this around for months." And with finality, he threw the small black box onto her lap. "I don't want it anymore." And then he slammed the cab door on her face and walked away in the pouring rain. _

_Blair flinched. _

_Finally._

_She was breaking. He was done with her. Possibly for good. But still, she slowly took hold of the box he just threw at her and with shaking fingers and salty tears, she slipped in the diamond carat ring that the tiny box held so carefully. The rain poured down even more as if sensing the despair this young woman in a yellow cab felt. She glanced back at the empty space Nate left. _

_She was a fool._

_And her tears just fell. She didn't want to lose the man she loved the most but she was the one that let him walk away. It was her fault. It was…She thought about his words. His words that sprung right through her, rattled her world and all her beliefs in life. She didn't want to lose him. Nate…Why couldn't she just stop being in denial every single time? He was right. He was always right._

_And so with the ring determinedly encircling her small finger, she bolted out of the yellow cab and into the heavy rain, letting herself run after the man she loved. She had to take this chance. She shouldn't be afraid. She wanted to be with him. She was done being in denial. She was ready to move on. With him and only him. Nate… _

_Blair ran in her painful heels, not caring about the rain, not caring about anything but him. The rain blurred her vision but she didn't give up. She ran on the empty sidewalk until she finally caught a glimpse of his profile. _

_He was looking for a cat._

_And then he saw her. Shock filled his eyes at the sight of her. And then, it slowly turned to joy. Joy that he had finally broke through her and made her come back to him. She wasn't afraid anymore._

"_Where's the cat?"_

_Nate looked at her with sad eyes. "I don't know."_

_She couldn't let that happen. She had to find that cat. And she didn't care whether it looked like crazy calling for some random stray cat in a deserted alley, in the middle of a storm. She had to find that cat. Her life depended on it. She needed to find that cat. She needed to find that missing piece in her life. That cat symbolized that missing piece she was looking for and before she could run into Nate's arms, she needed to find it. And so she continued to call for it, frantically looking for it._

_Nate simply watched her._

_She couldn't find it. And she cried in despair at her failure. Nate looked at her in sympathy but did not utter a word. Blair looked back at the love of her life, hoping that even if she could not find the missing piece now, she would someday._

_Meow._

_Or maybe now would be good too._

_She turned to the sound, happiness surging through her at the sight of the cat she had been looking for. She had found it. She found it! She carefully took the shaking cat in her arms, hoping her body would be enough to give it warmth amidst this cold rain. She held onto it tight, thankful to all the gods there was that she was finally able to find it. Her missing piece. _

_She stood up and faced Nate, cat in her arms, rain and all. Blair was now ready to take this next step with him. She was not afraid anymore. True happiness was just beyond her reach now. This was what she was destined for._

_She slowly walked up to him, a smile on her face. He smiled too. This was a happy moment. Yes, despite the gloom, this was a happy moment. _

_They kissed. A romantic kiss. Like the one in the fairy tales. It was a every girl's dream come true._

_It was like happily ever after. _

_This was how Blair wished it would all be._

_And then, a bolt of lightning flashed throughout the sky. And then something changed._

_Nate broke away from the kiss. _

"_What's wrong?" Blair asked, confused._

_Something flashed in Nate's eyes. It frightened Blair to the core. What was happening?_

"_You're a whore."_

_What?_

"_What?" What? What? What? What was he saying? "What are you talking about?"_

_Thunder boomed in the skies but she heard what he said._

"_I'm sorry. I thought I could but I just can't forget what you did. You're a whore. You're like one of the Arabians Chuck's father used to own…"_

_Blair's eyes widened in horror. No. Please... Not you...Never you..._

_Nate..._

_"Rode hard and put away wet..."_

_No. No. No. NO! Everything was spiraling down. Nate? Telling her this? No. Please. God. Don't. The cat was long gone from her arms. Despairing tears once again poured down her beautiful eyes. This was no dream, no happily ever after...she had been decieved. this was a nightmare. She wanted to get out right now!_

"_Nate…" She pleaded._

"_I don't want you anymore. And I can't see why anyone else would."_

_His cruel words tore her apart inside out, her heart forever ripped. Her heart hurt so much..._

_So, so much..._

_Nate..._

_There was a reason she was afraid to take a chance and this was it. _

_And with one last gasp, she finally collapsed on the ground as she clutched her painful heart, with Nate leaving her to die in that deserted alley, in the middle of the terrifying rain storm._

* * *

NO!

Blair gasped out loud as she finally woke up from her latest nightmare. She sat upright on the sofa Serena left her in, panting and sweating in fear. Her tiny hands shook as she grasped her hair, forcing the memories of the dream – _the nightmare _– to fade away from her head. No. No. No.

"Nate…" She whispered painfully.

It was a dream. Nothing more. Nothing more.

_But it wasn't just nothing more. _

It was reality spoken in the lips of another man.

_Brown hair with brown eyes...dark, intense, passionate..._

Another man - who now currently sat in another sofa across from her - who, by the way, had been watching her sleep all night long. _She was still so beautiful even when asleep_, he thought longingly. He observed her silently as she continued to grasp for control, mentally erasing her nightmare, he supposed. He wished he could do it for her instead though. _Comfort her..._ He hated seeing her like this. _So close..._He wanted to reach out and hold her in his arms and _just_ comfort her. But he had been _succinct _that night at the bar, and she had called out to _another _man's name mere seconds ago; _a name, _which definitely was not his but that of his best friend – _ex-best friend - _and he could do nothing but hold onto his word and watch her writhe in pain, albeit he did not wish it upon her anymore.

_Just breathe Blair._

Slowly, she calmed down, breathing deeply _–inhale, exhale - _the remnants of the dream moving to the back of her mind, lingering there for the time being.

Blair made a mental note to herself to _not _watch _Breakfast with Tiffany's _for at least one year.

A movement caught her eye, startling her back to reality and then she finally looked up…

…into the deep brown orbs of the man she just _did not _want to see for at least a hundred years.

Chuck.

_Shit._

It took her a moment to realize that she had said his name out loud, that she had in fact slept in Serena's suite the night before soaked in her own tears, that Serena was gone now, fast asleep in her own chambers and that now, she faced him, _Chuck. _The Arabian boy. She could laugh out loud right about now at the joke she mentally made. But then he'd think she was crazy and probably spread it throughout the entire school again.

She lifted her blanket to cover herself. Not that she was naked or anything. In fact she was very much clothed. She just thought maybe the blanket would protect her from his evil clutches and intense stares and cruel words. Or maybe she was going truly crazy.

"Why are you here?" She finally questioned. It did kind of creep her out to find him sitting there as soon as she woke up. Had he been watching her sleep?

Chuck found himself caught off guard at the sound of her voice. _Why was he here? _He had told her a month ago that he was done with her. And now he was sitting here, watching her sleep, ready to protect her from any harm that would befall on her?…_Good God. _Well, he very much couldn't tell her that.

"As a matter of fact, I was just sitting here having breakfast in _my _stepsister's suite. I think I have the privilege to do so now." That was the lamest excuse he had ever thought of in his entire life. But nonetheless, he smirked his traditional smirk at her, took a huge bite at his delicious omelette breakfast and Blair just had to roll her eyes. It was a usual silent banter they had long before the limo episode happened. They silently both missed it, being friends with each other, having their usual battle of wits and words...Oh how they wanted to just go back to that, but they both knew that too much has happened and nothing will ever be like it used to.

A long and awkward silence settled upon them.

"Are you alright?" Chuck finally spoke up, unable to take the awkwardness anymore. He was very unused to it. Whether it was Blair or anyone else, he hated this feeling. Most of the time he'd just forget about that part by roughly kissing the girl and bang her on the wall to forget any feelings of awkwardness and whatnot. Apparently he couldn't do that to Blair anymore.

"I'm fine, Bass." She snapped, her defenses high up against him. Anything to protect her against him. "Why are you suddenly showing concern? I thought it was _'I don't want you anymore.' _Done and be done."

Chuck easily flared. "Easy Waldorf. It _is_ done and be done between us. I'm just quite disturbed by last night's events and I just _had_ to ask. I am _sorry _if it seems like such a crime to ask simple questions to an old friend who never usually breaks down in front of people."

Silence.

Blair was just at a loss for words. He'd never spoken to her like that before...

But then again, he'd never spoken to her the way he had at the bar a month ago, or at her birthday when everything was falling apart, or at the limo when he gently asked her if she was sure...

_Shut it, Blair. Don't even go there._

"Chuck…"

He cut her off. "You didn't break down at the bar that night when I shoved into your face what you are to me. So whatever it is that's happening to you now, it's got to be something, Blair."

She sighed heavily before responded. He did seem to be really concerned. And that was not good because he couldn't know what was happening to her. She really did not want to be reminded of yesterday though, the day she found out that she close to dying because she kept throwing up whenever the hell people decided to bully her.

"Look…" She began softly, wanting to cut him some slack. "If you want to help out, just don't ask questions, _please..._And don't try to pry. And just stay _out _of it. If that's the way it'll be then yes, I will really be fine and everything will be okay."

Chuck _obviously _was not convinced and was about to object when the golden girl decided to make her grand entrance, a morning smile on her face, delighted to see her friend awake.

"Good morning, B! The sun is shining brightly and it is such a beautiful day…" Serena exclaimed in a sing-song voice. Blair just rolled her eyes. Serena did have her overdramatic moments too. "Are you ready for…" She finally noticed the imposter in the room and her bright smile faded.

"What are you doing here, Chuck?"

Chuck smirked, his earlier concerned demeanor long gone. "I thought it was obvious? I'm eating your breakfast."

Serena looked infuriated at the statement and looked right about to explode. Blair watched on, amused at the same time pitying her best friend for going to have to live with such scumbag in a couple of month's time.

_Wonder how that'll turn out..._

"That _breakfast _you just ate was meant for _Blair_, Chuck. _Not you._ I can't believe you…" She stopped, not wanting to waste her breath any longer. "You know what? Never mind. Have it all! Me and Blair are eating out before school." And with that she dragged Blair out of her sofa and into her bedroom where'd they get ready.

Blair wanted to laugh out loud.

Maybe she should move in here when the Vander Bass's were officially…well…_Vander Bass's_. She'd definitely have amusing mornings whenever she woke up from terrible nightmares.

* * *

"What in the world are you doing, Blair?"

Serena and Blair were walking to their school with their lattes when Blair decided to make a stopover at the nearest café and emerging looking ridiculous in oversized shades and a disgustingly patterned bandana. Where in heaven's store did she get that?

"Isn't it obvious, Serena? I'm hiding!" Blair exclaimed.

Serena simply rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips, not buying it.

"What?!"

"Blair. It's been a month. I'm sure people would've already noticed you're still here." Serena just had to tap reason into her. Blair was being completely ridiculous.

"I'm trying to hide away my presence so that they could _completely _forget me, don't you understand?" Why couldn't Serena see it? Although it really was a disgusting bandana, something she never thought she'd end up wearing.

"I think people would notice more, Blair." As if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

Blair rolled eyes behind her shades.

They began walking and suddenly, there was click of a cell phone and some girl rushing to send Gossip Girl the latest gossip for the day – _Blair's hideous new get-up. _Great.

A passing girl from their school greeted them.

"Hey Blair! Love the new look!" The comment was obviously sarcastic, of course.

Blair groaned beside Serena.

And after that, the comments just wouldn't end, the flashing of cameras wouldn't stop, the clicking of cellphones wouldn't stop snapping away.

_Blair! Is that the new look for sluts?_

_My gawd! That bandana!_

_Your latest headband, B?_

Lalala. It just wouldn't end. When will they ever shut up?

And that was when Blair finally turned to her best friend in despair and words needn't to be spoken anymore. Serena even took off the shades and the bandana for her.

"You don't need to hide, Blair. You're strong and beautiful. They don't know who you are and what you're made of. And we'll fight them all together. You don't need _these_ to protect yourself from them." She had _these _with much disgust and with finality, she threw them in the nearest bin, as if she did that with all her clothing, linked arms with Blair and smiled as they made their way to school.

Blair really did love her best friend. She really did.

She swears she wouldn't know what to do without her.

* * *

Of course, their smiles and smooth journeys to school had to end at one point in time. Coming face to face with Blair's old clique plus the latest bitch of the year, who everyone now adored, Little J Humphrey, they knew their good morning was definitely doomed to be thrown right out in the bin as well.

Serena and Blair were passing by the MET steps when giggling could be heard from the top of the steps, the balcony where everyone could see the most popular group of girls in school, giggling and having a morning yogurt before school started. They seemed like the perfect girly-girl group. They all had headbands and wore trench coats and everything...

_Wonder where they got that idea from. _Serena thought disgustingly.

She glared the moment she saw Jenny. How could she? Serena still reeled at the fact that Jenny, the innocent little sister of her boyfriend could do something so cruel. Especially to Blair. Never mind that. Someday, she'd give Little J a piece of her mind. Apparently, Dan was on her side because things seemed to be heating up at their home. Dan always was the ideal man when it came to principles and sticking up to them. Jenny changed when she promised she wouldn't. She even looked different. What? Now she cut her hair too? Serena just wanted to run up there to where they were and slap her face. _Seriously. _

Penelope, the raven-haired bitch caught a glimpse of the dethroned pair of best friends first. Of course, her main eye was centered on the petite brunette, who she despised with every fiber of her being. And her eyes glinted evilly at sight of her. Taking down Blair always made her stress go away. She certainly considered it as a new hobby she now loved. As do the rest of the girls that stood by her. This shall be an interesting morning indeed.

"Well, well." Her voice sly and filled with malice. "Look who decided to drop by this morning. The Queens of the Sluts. How was your evening, B? Decide to spread your legs to some random guy on the streets? I'm sure. Careful S, Blair's got a thing for anything that is labeled as 'best friend'. You might just find her spreading her legs for your Brooklyn boyfriend…" And then, with a final note. "If _his _best friend hasn't already."

And they all looked down upon them from where they stood and laughed their hearts out. People who passed by stopped walking to watch the exchange between the new queens and the ex-queens, their cell phones ready in their hands, excitingly ready to spread some juicy gossip and watch the screen unfold before them.

That last comment was enough to fire up the golden princess. So now Jenny was telling them about the whole Vanessa issue? Whatever the hell else did she fucking tell them?!

And Blair saw it. She was about to step up for her blonde friend when Serena herself beat her to it.

"Penelope, we understand where this has been going along." Serena started in mock sympathy. "Chuck isn't interested. No matter what moves you pull, he'll never sleep with someone like you, no matter how much you try to look and act like Blair."

Blair's eyes widened slightly but she heard the laughter and giggles and decided to let the comment pass coming from Serena. The result was music to her ears. She smirked in satisfaction when Penelope's faced reddened with embarrassment.

"And how dare you accuse me of spreading my legs for any random guy on the street when it is you all who are usually fond of doing that." Blair interjected. "Don't put all _your _actions up to me." She faced Jenny and met her eye to eye. "And don't ever spread things about my friend, Little J. You have no idea who you are dealing with."

Jenny simply scoffed. She was the one perched on the high pedestal now, looking down on everyone, including Blair Waldorf _and _Serena Vander Woodsen.

"Apparently, I do know _who_ I'm dealing with." Jenny proclaimed to all but still meeting Blair eye to eye. "And you have no right to say things to _my _friends because you're not worth anything anymore. You broke up with Nate and then slept with _Chuck? _Chuck. Of all the people you could sleep with, Blair! It had to be the man-whore of the entire Upper East Side. And then you slept with Nate after you slept with Chuck? On the same week?" She laughed cruelly above them. And then she stopped and glared at her, condemning her for all her actions. "Don't you think you've done enough damage, Blair? Nate doesn't deserve someone like you. You're like trash wrapped in pretty designer clothes."

And with great _intention, _she grabbed her yogurt and poured it all on Blair. It hit the exact spot that was Blair's perfectly groomed hair.

The girls boomed with laughter and soon, everyone else who witnessed the scene laughed along with them.

"Way to go Little J!" Hazel commended, clearly the winner of the battle as she high fived the blonde.

Faced with another public humiliation, Blair suddenly felt weak and wanted to just cry it all out. The yogurt felt so icky on her hair...This..._Oh my God_...Shame filled her...This was worse than torture...She was so close to breaking down again. She could feel the tears stinging her eyes and she could barely hold it anymore. She wished she had just flown to France and forget about her home land for the rest of her life. That or she seriously hoped the ground would just up open right now and swallow her whole.

"Blair…" Serena whispered at her side. Serena squeezed her arm to support her, holding on for dear life. She could feel Blair weakening and she instantly felt that powerful urge to protect Blair every time people would place her in a state like this. She hated Jenny. She hated them all. And she swore to herself that she would be the one to take them all down if Blair finally didn't have the strength to do so anymore. How dare they do this to her.

"I guess that's just how it is for people like _you, _B." Hazel laughed with triumph. Her minions followed.

"God, Jenny. You've really changed." Serena spoke softly but her words sendinga deep impact to the used to be innocent nice girl from Brooklyn. "There will come a time when it will be _you _who has nothing and your friends up there with you will all be gone."

Jenny just rolled her eyes at Serena's threat. She was unfazed because she was confident and she was looking down on her.

And out stepped in Nate from nowhere – _impeccable timing really _– and he just stood there on the top of the stairs beside the balcony, watching everything transpire before his eyes. Blair looked up to the love of her life in shame and humiliation, yogurt dripping on her perfect hair, tears barely controlled in her eyes.

Was he satisfied now? Was she punished enough already? Perhaps now maybe he could forgive her? She loved him! She left Chuck and treated Chuck cruelly for him! She forgave everything he did to her! Surely, all their years of being together and in love since kindergarten would finally be put to use in this climactic moment. She was silently begging him with her eyes to save her and _yes, _even Serena from this horrifying public humiliation.

Everyone's attention was now fixed on the newcomer, silence surrounding the MET steps. What would Nate do? Save her or abandon her?

_Nate...save me please..._

But Nate just stared back wordlessly and emotionlessly.

And then…

"Don't try to blame Jenny into this. Because she's right and you know it."

Jenny smirked in triumph.

And then it was like the dream again. Except it wasn't Chuck's words anymore. And it wasn't a private conversation in a bar. It was public humiliation. Total and absolute social destruction. Pain tore upon her insides – _would this ever end? – _Nate…How could he do this to her? _He _was the one who slept with _her _best friend when _they _were _still _together. And she's the one who's the evil one? She had given almost everything to Nate. She had been the perfect girlfriend, the perfect everything. She did _everything _he _wanted _her to do. And because of _him, _she had left Chuck and bitched at him until Chuck decided to ruin her and now this? _This _was what she got for being someone she could never hope to be, for the man she loved since kindergarten. In the name of damned _love?..._

_He always hurt her…always...always..._

She wanted to scream or run up to him and slap his face, yell all her anger and pain at him in front of everyone. But she just stood there, completely crushed, heartbroken and dying, watching as Nate turned to walk away from her, as yogurt continued to plague her hair and everyone's laughter continued to ring in her ears.

_Nate…_

Serena had had enough of all this! She let go of Blair and ran after the golden boy _– how dare he – _roughly forced him to turn around and slapped his faced in front of the entire school. The slap was hard, echoing throughout the MET as silence ensued amongst all of them.

Blair completely jaw-dropped from what was happening now. _Serena..._What she couldn't do, Serena would do for her...She was just not sure now if she was still alive or not, too shocked at the turn of events.

Cameras began flashing now but no one spoke and everyone remained still shocked at the actions of their favorite golden ex-queen.

The anger seeping through her eyes was burning Nate. He had never seen her this way. _Never..._He wanted to run away from her now.

And then she whispered menacingly to him, "You think you're all clean, Nate? You slept with _me_, while you and Blair were still together, remember? You're as much of a whore as she is. _How dare you. _Mess with my best friend again and I swear_ I_ will be the one to let everyone know about the true story of _our _friendship. I will be the one to ruin you and anyone else who tries to bully Blair." She warned, she eyes glaring and seeing through him _– burning -_, her blue eyes so cold and Nate was truly frightened because Serena meant what she said and she would do what she just warned him now. He never knew she was this protective over Blair. Serena was never this angry at anyone. It was always Blair who was the one who held the grudges.

Serena swiftly turned, a warrior princess ready to take down anyone else who would try to bully Blair. She quickly made it to her best friend's side and led her weakening profile to safety, away from the cold and prying eyes.

"I don't want to go back there, S." Blair pleaded. "I can't."

Serena took hold of her hand, hoping it would give her strength. "Blair…"

Blair dropped her hand out from Serena's grip, as if it burned her. "I can't Serena! I really can't!"

And with that, the petite brunette ran away, away from all the shame and humiliation and nightmare this morning brought her.

It was moments like these that made her feel like she really couldn't make it alive at the end of the month.

How could she control herself when things like this kept happening, making her feel worthless and shameful?

Serena watched as her best friend ran away, heartache eating away the golden princess. She hated seeing Blair like this. But she let her go because she understood Blair needed space and some time alone to gather herself. She'd come back later.

As of now, Serena felt so drained. She gave so much of her power to Blair, she was running out herself.

Only one person could lift her spirits at a time like this.

_Dan…_

She needed to see Dan.

She ran in the other direction as fast as she could, in the hopes of seeing his handsome face and feeling his lips pressed upon hers in less than 2 minutes...

* * *

One person stood from afar, leaning on another balcony just across the popular clique group, watching everything that had taken place at the steps of the MET this morning.

He was always in the shadows, watching, observing especially when it had to do Blair. _Everything_ had to do with Blair now. He wanted to but he couldn't approach her anymore. This early morning was his first actual conversation with her and it didn't even help that half of the time, he felt so vulnerable. That was the problem when he was with Blair these days, he always felt so vulnerable and that was never a good thing. He had been hurt one too many times by said girl of his dreams.

But today, Chuck felt his heart reach out for the brunette he once wanted to do everything for.

_He still wanted to do everything for her._

_She didn't deserve this..._

As hurt as he was by her, he didn't expect things to be this way. He didn't _want _things to be this way. He didn't wish for anyone else to hurt her or bully her _until now_, especially _those _girls. They absolutely had no right to. They were the ones who had no class or self-respect. He hated them. Especially that little blonde Humphrey that mascaraded around the place as if she was some ark angel.

He seriously wanted to wring her neck and throw her body in the Nile River.

And Little J Humphrey had to be taught a lesson soon. The nerve to pour that yogurt on Blair! It angered him, the injustice of it all. Infuriated him beyond words and meaning. Weren't they all so dirty as well? _Hypocrites._ They all had their deep dark secrets as well and it was only time before someone tried to unleash them.

No matter how much of bitch Blair was to people, yes, including him, she had never done such a low thing as what Jenny did today. Blair had class and never literally made things dirty. She still showed some respect at least. And Blair was nothing compared to those girls. What Jenny did was far to low. And Penelope and Hazel...well he wanted to wring their necks too.

He'd definitely get back at them for her. Even if she didn't know it was him behind the curtains.

It was the least he could do for her. Plus it would definitely be entertaining on his part, to partake in the downfall of the little ark angel everybody so adored now.

Blair would be so proud of him. And even if, she wouldn't rise to the top again, at least she'd be delighted that she had her revenge.

He sighed and slumped more at his position.

_He really did miss her. _

They were always the perfect, albeit notorious couple whenever it came to scheming and manipulating others. He missed his old friend. Even more so than he did Nate...

So why again did he say those cruel words to her that night?

She had finally come to him, just as he wanted. But he had consumed too much scotch and Nate wanted to kill him and he had been _her _last resort. He was sick of being vulnerable to her. He was sick of her hurting him, every single time. He was sick of feeling those butterflies everytime she was near him.

So he finally incinerated those butterflies once and for all.

_But they would always resurface against his will. _

Now was one of those times. Last night too.

That was the problem, really. They kept resurfacing everytime he didn't want them to. These butterflies were the reason he hurt Blair in the first place. He really, really hated them.

Despite his words about not wanting her anymore, he wanted her everyday since she walked out that bar, silent, for once not having her last word in. He wanted to run after her, apologize for everything he did and give into her wishes, whatever she wanted. But then he remembered the night at the Debutante Ball when she was in the arm's of another man – _his best friend – _who only wanted her back because she was finally out of his life and happy with him. Chuck. The man-whore of all the Upper East Side was the source of her happiness that time.

_Nate…_

He couldn't believe Nate had actually humiliated Blair publicly today. He knew she always wanted him to save her.

_He never did and he never would._

He didn't know who hurt her more now, him or Nate. Yeah. No wonder they used to be best friends. They shared two things in common. One: They were after one girl. Two: They were both jerks to that same girl they were after for.

_Blair was a fool. _

_He _could've been the one to save her today. But she had chosen Nate. Everybody else always chose _Nate. _And where did that get them? In hell.

Well Blair served her time and that was enough. It was time he got back in the game with her. Plus he was sure Serena would get tired physically fighting off in a battle he knew she was an amateur in. Serena was too kind these days for things like this. Although that scene with her slapping Nate - _God, even he heard that from where he was - _totally rattled the cores out of him. Apparently, Brooklyn boy was showing her some moves in the fighting scene. And Serena was getting over-protective of Blair these days. He had better be careful being around her. He didn't want another black eye from her either.

So for today he had finally come up with a conclusion. _Secretly help Blair while staying away from her. Kill Jenny. Avoid black eye from Serena, Nate or Dan. Kill butterflies again and again._

He smirked. He'd definitely accomplish all of these with great efficiency.

With that resolve, he pushed from his position on the balcony, grabbed his bag and headed up to his first class.

Yes. What an interesting morning this has been indeed.

* * *

_To be continued..._

**EDITTED. **Thanks to _TheMusicLives, _I have been able to proofread and identify all my annoying mistakes. THANKS SO MUCH. See? Reviews are very helpful once in awhile. HAHA.

The Popular Clique Group: Used to be confused between Hazel and "Penelope" (so I've learned recently). I thought Hazel was the dark-haired girl who told Blair in episode 13, _"Consider yourself dethroned, Queen B."_ Yup. But No. That wasn't HAZEL. That's Penelope! :p Hazel was the short, blonde haired girl with the shoulder length hair. HAHAHAHA. NOW I KNOW. :P

See? I told you it sucked. It was just a drabble and I know this was SUPER DUPER UPER bad idea but I just really had to get it all out of my thoughts.

Please dont hate me. hahahaa. I promise next chapter, total spoiler free coz duh, I dont know what will happen next. Plus none of this will really happen anyway (unfortunately).

You know how you wish for things to happen but it never does because the writers just love to screw things up? haha. So there.

The dream sequence was quoted from _Breakfast at Tiffany's, _alley-cat scene (yes, I watched it for the sake of this chapter). I found it kind of weird she suddenly started looking for a cat...so that was the best interpretation I could come up with. I'm so sorry. haha. I suck.

Review to those people who read though. Please no bashing. Just constructive criticisms. Thank you! haha.


	3. Chapter 3: Magical Memories

**A/N: NO MORE SPOILERS I PROMISE. SO YOU CAN READ THIS CHAPTER AND EVERYTHING ELSE NOW! YAY!…**

Contrary to the wonderful people who actually read the previous chapter (you spoiler lovers, so bad haha), I still think it really sucked coz well, it was a risk to do something like that, write about my imaginations down and I didn't write it out so well…at least not for me. :p BUT ANYWAY THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING. Yeah I agree with everyone when they say the FIRST CHAPTER rocked! Hahaa. See, the beauty of no spoilers. :p

Another reason I wrote that previous chapter was because I hated Jenny so much and I wanted you all to just NOT be on her side EVER AGAIN. (Wow. Shit, so evil. Sorry Jenny fans! Guess this story is not meant for you guys)

NOTE: The Chuck and Blair scene from the previous chapter (after she woke up from the nightmare) was no spoiler. Sorry to disappoint. It's all on me.

So more Chuck and Blair here…I think…haha. :p

SAD NEWS: I won't be able to update for quite awhile like a week or something coz I'll be busy doing photo shoots and writing papers and doing projects. Busy, busy week! So sorry! I promise I'll update as soon as hell week is OVER.

On with the show! :D

* * *

She ran away.

Far, far away.

_Though not that far away…_at least not to her.

France would be the perfect definition of _'far, far away' _to her, but she couldn't do that anymore. Serena would be so disappointed. She didn't want that.

It was late afternoon. The weather was getting colder, the sun was sinking, the skies were getting darker. Did Blair even notice that?

_No._

She was just walking aimlessly all over New York City with absolutely no destination in mind. She skipped all her classes today, not wanting to go back to that hellhole she used to call _school. _She didn't want to endure another form of torture from her _used to be friends _and _boyfriend._

Serena was her only friend now. Fine, maybe Cedric could be included to her list.

Gone were all her tears. The cold wind had dried them all away. She would never shed a tear before or for them again.

She was numb. No more pain. Just a blank mind and an emptiness within her.

She'd shut off her phone. Serena would be calling, she knew. Serena would be hella worried because it was getting dark and Blair was still going MIA. Serena would definitely go crazy at the thought of Blair being lost for awhile. She knew she should stop torturing her best friend after everything Serena'd done for her, but Blair just couldn't – _wouldn't – _dare open her phone. She'd see another embarrassing text from Gossip Girl about her morning yogurt delights or about Nate taking Jenny's side instead of hers or about Serena's vicious attacks to him.

Blair had to smile as she remembered that scene. Her best friend really was something. And to think Nate slept with _her_ first and he got slapped by _her _in the end? She had to laugh out loud. Finally, some karma on him.

She sighed. She'd never forget that scene _ever_.

As she continued walking to God knows where, she wondered for the umpteenth time since her downfall, how and why her life decided to start spiraling out control.

Everything was planned out. Everything was supposed to be perfect. Then unexpect things started happening that was not part of the plan. Suddenly her parents got divorced, Serena left and everything was just never the same again. Nate changed, so did Serena when she came back, albeit it was a good change. Her father changed. Even _Chuck _changed.

Blair hated change. That's why everything was so out of proportion now. She hated it even more because no matter how much she forced it, forced things to be the way she wanted them to be, she could never really do anything about it.

_Nothing was the same…_

In the end, she'd changed too along with everyone and everything else. _If only _and _what if _were just said one too many times in her head.

So now that her life was nearing an end, _– she groaned every time she remembered that single fact – _how was she going to pick up the pieces before it was too late?

Did she really want to spend her last remaining Earth days just plotting against all those who humiliated her? Why the hell should she bother wasting her last energies on them? They were nothing to her now. Like how she was nothing to them.

She wasn't even sure if she wanted to be on top again. She didn't want to be near those people who betrayed her. Sure, she wanted the public tortures to stop. Maybe that was all she wanted. Some damn _respect_ once in awhile. She wanted to show them all that she was worthy of it. They've all done their own indiscretions at one point in their lives anyway.

Such hypocrites really.

So she did something more gruesome than the Vanessa Hudgens scandal, but seriously, did her life really have to be on the line because of it? Because the people around her always made her feel like she was worthless, dirty and ugly?

_No…_

But it was too late. She was going to die. Sooner, if not later. And the only thing she could do about it was try to prolong it, just enough so that all her last wishes could be fulfilled before she would take her final bow.

Speaking of prolonging it…

She stopped.

_Shit._

She totally forgot to take her medications today because she had been so busy walking around NYC with a blank mind. She'd forgotten to take _all_ of them. And boy, did her doctor give her a lot.

_Great. _

Now, she really was going to die before the end of this day.

_Great, great, great! Wonderful Waldorf. Why don't you just kill yourself while you're at it?_

She'd thought maybe she'd treat herself to dinner, a full, _healthy, nutritious _dinner _– without throwing them up - _before heading back to her world. That way she could take her medications at least this once a day and maybe she wouldn't have to die at the end of it!

That was an exaggeration, of course but she mentally gave herself a pat on the back for thinking of such a productive plan.

Her eyes took a moment to actually look around where she stopped and gathered her surroundings. Stone steps, a huge white building where only angels were allowed to enter. The signs at the front said so.

_The Church._

Funny, how she'd traveled all over New York and ended up here. Only angels were allowed to enter the gates of the Church. She was far from one. She had too many sins held accountable for. Wonder what she'd say when she'd actually come face to face with the Man Upstairs soon. Perhaps it was a sign.

"Wow. Didn't expect to see _you _here, Waldorf."

Blair turned to the voice.

And then rolled her eyes.

"Vanessa." She uttered with a mockery of a smile on her face. "You're here. _Joy_ of my life. Gosh, now my day just got all the more better."

Vanessa wasn't one to back down. "Likewise. Now I feel I could _fly _to heaven now that I've got to see you right now."

Blair scowled. "Humor. Never knew you had one."

"Never thought you'd notice."

Blair just stared back angrily which gave Vanessa the chance to finally take in the appearance of the so-called Ice Princess.

"What happened to your hair?"

The anger in her eyes changed to horror. She'd forgotten about that.

"Nothing." She spat out bitterly. "Just your ex-lover's sweet sister playing a game with yogurt with me and this was the result."

"Jenny?" Vanessa doubled. And then she nodded slowly. "Right. I heard about what happened."

"How?"

"Dan."

"Right."

"I'm so sorry."

"No you're not." Blair stared directly into her eyes, willing her to challenge her statement.

Vanessa was not one to lie. "No. I'm not. But if that's the reason you're here, then I guess good things can happen."

Blair just raised her eyebrows at her comment as Vanessa began to make her way up the stone steps. When she realized Blair wasn't following, she turned back confused.

"Aren't you going to come in?"

Blair hesitated before she responded. "I'm not allowed to go in."

Now it was Vanessa's turn to raise her eyebrow. She motioned around the place. "Do you see any sign here that says '_Blair Waldorf isn't allowed to enter'? _Look, everybody sins. That's why people actually come here, if not to fix them but to face them. And that's why people like you or _them_, actually," She was referring to all Blair's other rich and snotty ex-friends. "Never come here. Because you can't even acknowledge them, let alone face them. The fact that you're here Waldorf says something about yourself."

"What's that?"

Vanessa took a moment before she said, "You're far better than the rest of them."

And with that she turned and headed into the confines of the Church.

Blair stood for moment, letting Vanessa's words register in her brain.

She then smiled – _her first, true genuine smile all day – _and followed the raven haired girl eagerly into the Church.

* * *

_The snow was beautiful as it fell from the skies, creating a Winter Wonderland for all of New York to bask in. There was a little breeze, but it only added to the ambiance of it all. The cold didn't matter because the snow was beautiful. There was something magical about winter, that's why he always loved it. That's why this memory was forever lingering in his mind, nobody else knowing about it except them. It was one of the few things he was allowed to cherish with her, with nobody else putting themselves in to distort it. _

_They were Central Park that day when the snow fell, their parents wanting to have a meeting together and thought that having the children play around the snow would be a lovely idea. They only five years old and surely a bit of snow would be appealing to the children._

_Well at least young Serena and Nate played, running around, screaming, and throwing snow at each other's face while leaving the poor little Blair all alone to wallow in her misery. Serena always took everything from her these days. Mostly Nate's attention. And Nate was just happy to give it to her. They were both free-spirits. They didn't care about catching dirt on their perfect clothing. They were only children after all._

_Little Chuck stood from a distance and watched as Nate chased Serena, with smiles on both their faces and Blair sitting alone on a swing, a sad, downcast look upon her child-like features, the snow softly falling on her hair, falling all over her._

_Despite the situation, that was the very first time he thought that she was beautiful._

"_Why are you sad?" Chuck asked as he approached her._

_Young Blair glanced up, startled by the intrusion to her thoughts. It was Chuck, the strange brown hair-brown eyes boy who always seemed to notice when she was in situations like this. She didn't know what to make of him. A knight in shining armor? No. That was Nate. Who was with Serena. The true princess. _

"_Serena always takes everything from me." Blair finally answered in a timid voice._

_Chuck took a seat on the swing beside her._

"_Why don't you play too?" He asked gently._

"_Because Nate won't play with me!" She huffed._

"_Why do you need Nate to play with you?"_

_Blair was getting annoyed by his many questions but she answered nevertheless._

"_Because I just want someone to play with!"_

"_Would you play with me?" There was something in the way his eyes gazed at her that moment, but perhaps it was the snow, the magical winter. After all they were only five years old. _

_Blair's sad features slowly transformed into a delighted, happy one, enhancing her beauty even more. Chuck thought no one else could look more beautiful in the snow but then again he was only five years old and he had yet to see the world. _

"_Yes!" _

_Chuck stood up and outstretched his hand, pretending to be a perfect gentleman. Blair's doe-eyes gazed at it before she gladly took it, happy to be led away by the strange brown hair-brown eyed boy. _

_He led her to the merry-go-round, the snow still falling on their heads. He started spinning her first…_

"_Faster!"_

_Before he himself hopped on. He stumbled as he did and they both laughed gleefully at his clumsiness. They teased each other, laughed with each other…_

_Spinning and spinning and spinning under the falling magical snow._

"_I'm tired." Blair finally announced, but the joy still evident in her features._

_They both sat down next to each other on the edge of the merry-go-round as soon as it stopped. And then…_

_She suddenly leaned on his shoulder and just lay there content and happy for the day. Chuck stiffened at first with the contact. He wasn't exactly used to this kind of treatment. But then, he soon softened. He liked the feel of the most beautiful girl's head resting on his shoulder. It was a happy moment for him._

_If a passerby saw them, they'd think they were young sweethearts, taking a rest from their playground activities. _

"_I think you're beautiful." Chuck suddenly said. Though why he did, he did not know._

_Blair's eyes widened but she didn't move her head from his shoulder. He felt comfortable. "Serena's more beautiful than me." She said quite sadly again._

"_To Nate." He said quite firmly for a child. "But to me, you're the most beautiful girl in the world."_

_Blair smiled softly. "Thank you, Chuck." She paused. "I think you're handsome too."_

_Chuck just laughed. _

"_Do you think when we grow up I'll end up with you?" Blair suddenly asked._

"_Well if you want to." Chuck replied simply._

_Blair slowly linked her little hand with Chuck's. "Maybe I will end up with you then."_

_He smiled. "That would be nice."_

"_And it would be forever and ever."_

_Chuck shifted himself closer to her so he could make themselves more comfortable. To be honest, his heart was doubling its pace but he was a child and he thought it was only because he was exhausted from playing too much. _

"_Forever." He echoed. "That's a wonderful idea."_

_And they just sat there in comfortable silence, both happy they got to spend a time like this with each other. The snow softly kept falling on their heads, growing more so thicker as the sun continued to sink down. They didn't really mind, it was a Winter Wonderland, their own Winter Wonderland._

_At one point of course, the happy moment had to be put to an end. _

_But they knew what this memory meant to both of them. They felt the magic of winter and they weren't about to forget it anytime soon._

* * *

She barged through his room, banging the doors hard, enough to wake him up from his latest dream. Well not really a dream, just a trip down to memory lane, _one of his most precious memories,_ so to speak.

Apparently, she had a key, given by his father, no doubt.

She seemed to approach him with a purpose. And she looked angry? Pissed off? Panicked? He couldn't really tell. His eyes were still groggy from his unexpected slumber on the couch. She suddenly threw a couch pillow on his face to snap his attention to her.

"WAKE UP, YOU IDIOT!"

"Sis…" Chuck groaned. Well it definitely worked. "What a pleasant surprise…I'm kind of tired, so maybe we can try whatever it is you had planned late – "

He was rudely cut off but another pillow thrown to his head. "SHUT UP!" Serena was furious. "Where the hell is Blair?!"

_What? Well how the hell was he supposed to know? _

"In my dreams?" Well technically that was sort of true.

"You're sick." Serena spat. "Where is she?"

Chuck sat up straighter, slowly focusing. "I think it should be you who knows that. You two are practically inseparable these days."

"She ran off okay?!" Serena exclaimed, exasperated. She was getting worried. "But that was this morning. She skipped school all day. I've been trying to call her phone but it's off, tried her house, she didn't go home all day. I've tried her mom, Dorotha, even _Nate _for crying out loud. I don't know where she is and it's getting dark out there."

That seemed to be enough send the alarming bells in Chuck's head. He stood up, forgetting that he looked like crap at the moment.

"We'll find her." He said with determination. "She's alright."

"I'm getting really worried Chuck. It's been a bad morning to her with Jenny and all and she hasn't called or anything. Something could've happened."

He prayed to all the gods there were up there that nothing did happen to her.

"Let's just go." He was already grabbing his jacket and heading out the door.

"Where?" Serena asked, startled by his quick paced movements at the mention of Blair missing and possibly in danger.

"I don't know." Chuck replied agitated. "Somewhere. Anywhere. Until we find her. We'll take the limo."

And with that they dashed off. Of course Serena was surprised with his determination to find her best friend. Even Nate didn't show that much attention. But now wasn't the time to dwell on such thoughts.

She'd have to question Chuck about it later.

* * *

"Stop the car."

"What?" Chuck started, confused. "Why?"

"Just shut the hell up and tell your driver to stop the damn car." Serena demanded, agitated.

Chuck just rolled his eyes but did what he was told –_ commanded – _to do. Seriously, his new sister was extremely bossy and demanding when she was angry even more so than Blair could ever be. No wonder they were best friends. That or maybe they were just rubbing off each other's attitudes these days.

Serena bolted out of the limo as soon as the car stopped. That raised Chuck's hopes. If she was this frantic and fast-paced, was she able to find Blair?

"Hey Serena." A voice, definitely not Blair's greeted the blonde. And then, the voice turned to him as soon as his head lifted out of the limo.

"You." It was said with so much venom.

Chuck groaned when he saw who he was face to face with. Humphrey Boy's best friend or something or other. Nope. Definitely not Blair.

"You." He greeted with practically the same level of hostility in his voice.

"Wow. This day just keeps popping surprises for me." Vanessa began with distain in her voice as she looked at Chuck. Blair had told her as much earlier and as much as she had a ping-pong war in her head whether to feel soft for the guy or not, Vanessa would rather she just remain hard to him because of everything he did to her. God, she really hated this ass in front of her. Really, _unbelievable._

Serena, meanwhile, ignored Chuck nor did she bother noticing the hostility between the two. She had a mission to do and that was to find her lost best friend.

"Look Vanessa," Serena began apologetically. "I'm so sorry barging in on you like this but I'm looking for Blair, she's been missing all day and I'm so worried about her."

Vanessa raised her eyebrows at that, clearly unfazed. "Yeah, I've seen Blair. Actually, I've been with her all afternoon, talking to her about her issues," She gave a pointed look to Chuck. "About you. About what you said to her. About what you did. You're an _ass."_

Chuck was speechless, for the first time in front of a stranger.

She turned again to the blonde. "Anyway she just left."

Serena and Chuck's eyes rose at that. "Where'd she go?" They said at the same time. They gave each other a glare before Serena continued. "Did she tell you where she'd go?"

"Yeah." There was a pause. They were waiting for her to tell her where Blair was. "But I'm not going to tell you."

Now it was Serena's turn to be speechless. Moments like these, she hated Vanessa. Ugh, if it just weren't for Dan.

"Vanessa…please…" Serena began.

"No." She cut off. "No offense Serena. But I'm not telling you. Not so long as you're with this guy here." She pointed to Chuck. "Look, I know what you did to her. And you know, she really needed you that time. Never mind the fact that _you _were the cause of _everything _that happened to her. But she came to you because she thought you'd always be there for her. But no. You just had to screw her off and abandon her just like the rest of them.

"You know seriously, I don't know what possessed her to go to _you _of all people in her time of need but I think – "

She didn't get to finish what she said as she was shoved onto his black limo, his hand roughly against her shirt, holding her down, close to choking the life out of her. She showed no fear whatsoever.

Chuck was pissed. Who was this girl anyway? What right did she have to say anything? She didn't know anything!

"Look missy, I don't care what you think but you have no idea what the hell you're talk-"

Vanessa scoffed and interrupted him rudely, even as she was held dangerously against him. "I don't know what I'm talking about? Blair _told _me _everything _Chuck. She cried on me and we both went to Church together to confess _her sins_. She really believed you when you said she was a nothing more but a _whore_. Let go of me!" She roughly pushed his hands away, startling Chuck with her strength. Serena was obviously shocked with what she heard. Blair did not tell her about that little detail. And with good reason.

"If you really want to find her, which I don't think you should because I don't think she wants to see _you_," She continued pointing at Chuck, facing him. He honestly hated the way she kept saying 'you'.

"_You_ look into that head of yours and try to remember where you first saw her looking sad and disheartened on a snowy winter like this." And with that, Vanessa walked off, leaving the two step-siblings alone to do the search on their own. She was positive that Chuck would never remember what Blair had told her earlier, he would never cherish such a beautiful memory like that.

But then again, Vanessa really had no idea who Chuck Bass was. At least the real one.

Chuck stared at Vanessa's walking profile, unsure what to make of her. His jaw clenched, his fists balled, he tried to breathe and calm himself and just focus. If he didn't, he wouldn't be able to find Blair and he might just hit her best friend beside him. She'd never forgive him if he did that.

Serena watched as Chuck seemed to battle to control himself. What did Vanessa mean? She felt so useless because she had no idea what the hell everybody was talking about. It was dark now and extremely cold, they had to find Blair soon.

"Chuck?..." Serena asked with caution.

It took a long, _long_ moment before Chuck was able to turn around and answer.

"I know where she is."

* * *

She was shivering.

It was freezing out here and her coat was not enough to shield her from the night's winter winds. She didn't understand why she was here in the first place. Why this memory popped into her mind so suddenly after she thought she'd forgotten all about it was beyond her. Now she was here, in the cold, reliving some used to be magical snow day, hoping to calm her tortured self.

All her plans of having dinner and actually taking her medication were down the drain. After her Church activities with Vanessa, she didn't think _again _and had come straight here, to the place where it all started.

She seriously was going to die by the end of tonight if she didn't start taking her medications.

She sat on the swing and not on the merry-go-round, where she initially sat on that magical day of so long ago, hoping that _he'd _be the one to find her here, which was definitely _impossible _because he didn't even know where she was at the moment, much less _care _that she was missing.

_Stupid girl. You really are yearning for a death wish are you?_

And then, to top things off, it began to snow.

_Wonderful. _

It would've helped if it wasn't so damn cold though. She was literally freezing, she could barely move and get up to start walking to her warm home. She could already picture it now:

_Elite teenage girl frozen to death on the grounds of Central Park. _Wonderful. It wasn't even bulimia anymore that killed her. Great.

Why was she even having a soft spot for Chuck now anyway? What was up with this walk to memory lane anyway? She thought she'd forgotten about this. So why the hell did he keep entering her mind these days? He was the one that abandoned her in the end, like the rest of them! He was the one who hurt her the most! He was the one that called her a whore, haunted her dreams, not to mention, kept showing up every time she didn't want him to…

"Why are you sad?"

_Oh. MY. GOD! _No. No. NO WAY!

She looked up startled, thinking she was dreaming, _hallucinating_ when she saw _him _really walking up to her, all dark and handsome with his trademark scarf, making his way on the swing next her, a permanent smirk on his face. She was torn between wanting to box him or hug him.

"Chuck…" She was so speechless, she felt like such an idiot. Seriously, who wouldn't be? What the hell was he doing here?! She was still thinking she was dreaming. In fact, she even thought she was already dead now and it was her soul making this fantasy happen. This couldn't be real. She gazed through his face, looked through his appearance, scrutinized every bit of him. He seemed real enough. And that fact just didn't stop the shock from coming on.

"What are you doing here? How did you know I was here?"

Chuck smirked. "Someone tipped me off." He stood up and outstretched his hand, pretending to be a perfect gentleman. "Besides, how could I forget that this was where _our _forever started?"

Blair's eyes widened, still not believing this unexpected turn of events, albeit it was a really good turn of events. She seriously hoped this wouldn't end bad.

Chuck frowned and outstretched his hand more so she could finally notice it. She was so dazed by his appearance, she'd forgotten his hand reaching out to her.

"Would you play with _me?" _

Blair looked up to darkened sky and the falling snow, searching for a God she thought she'd been seeing by the end of this night. _Oh my goodness, Lord. _She seriously could not believe this was happening.

Her eyes were brimming with tears as she gently put her hand in his and said, "Yes."

And he led her to their old merry-go-round once more, the snow still falling on their heads. He started spinning her first...

"Faster, Chuck!"

Before he himself hopped on.He didn't stumble this time around but they just both laughed gleefully at what was happening between them now. It was happy moment once again, one, they never thought would be happening ever again for the both of them ever again.

_They teased each other, laughed with each other…_

They felt so free being able to laugh like this together once more. It had been so long since they laughed this real. Far too long.

_Spinning and spinning and spinning under the falling magical snow._

How they both wished it wouldn't stop spinning. They didn't want this happiness to stop.

But alas, they had to tire at one point. The merry-go-round stopped and they both sat next to each other on the edge of it.

They let a comfortable silence settle between them, both letting themselves get lost in their own thoughts for a moment.

And then Chuck's eyes traveled to Blair's shaking hands.

"You're cold." He stated. "Here." And with that he took off his warm scarf and wrapped it around her neck. Blair was beyond astounded by his sudden action. She was staring at him in wonderment as he silently adjusted the scarf tightly to her neck.

They both sat upright again when he was done, once again a silence between them, awkward this time. Both of them suddenly wished the merry-go-round would start again. And then without thinking…

Blair suddenly leaned on his shoulder and just lay there content and happy for the day. Chuck stiffened at first with the contact, evidently shocked. He didn't expect this and he thought she didn't want to be in contact with him. But then, he soon softened. Just having the feel of her once again was something he would not complain about. He missed her. And even if this would be a last time, he wanted to cherish it.

If a passerby saw them, they'd think they were childhood sweethearts still together.

"I'm sorry for the things I said that night." Chuck suddenly said. Though why he did, he did not know. "I was so angry at you and hurt at everything you did to me that…I'm just _so sorry. _I never meant to hurt you so much."

Blair's eyes widened but she didn't move her head from his shoulder. He felt comfortable to her.

"I'm sorry for hurting you too Chuck." She said quite sadly.

"To me, you're the most beautiful girl in the world."

Blair smiled softly. She shook her head slightly, remembering his words as a child. "Thank you, Chuck." She paused for a moment. Dare she say it? "I think you're handsome too."

Chuck just laughed, just like he did last time. He couldn't help but feel the tingles growing all over him.

"Do you think when we grow up I'll end up with you?" Blair suddenly asked, the exact same question she asked him when she was five years of age. It was more serious now that were old enough to understand the depth of those words.

"Well if you want to." Chuck replied simply, although deep within his heart was pounding.

Blair slowly linked her tiny hand with Chuck's large ones. "Maybe I will end up with you then."

He smiled, he really, really hoped she would. "That would be nice."

"And it would be forever and ever this time around."

Chuck shifted himself closer to her so he could make themselves more comfortable. The butterflies fluttered tremendously now. He no longer was a child and he finally understood what this feeling was.

"Forever." He echoed just like his did when he was five. "That's a wonderful idea."

And they just sat there in comfortable silence, both happy they got to spend a time like this with each other once again. The snow softly kept falling on their heads, the wind growing stronger, making it all the more cold. They didn't really mind because they didn't really feel it, all they could feel was the warmth that they gave one another, the warmth they had been missing for so long.

They were back in their own Winter Wonderland and no one was there to bring themselves in to distort them.

At one point of course, the happy moment had to be put to an end.

But they knew this new memory, so similiar like the last, was one they both would never forget. How could they? They felt the magic of winter and they weren't about to forget it anytime soon.

"Come on." Chuck began. Blair looked up, startled. He smiled softly down at her. "Let's take you home. Baby's day out is over now. Plus Serena's extremely worried. We could all go to dinner."

Blair just laughed at how he referred her running away to that of that movie where the baby traveled all over New York on foot. And felt a sense of relief at the thought of finally having dinner. Plus factor, she wouldn't have to worry about eating alone and being on the front page of Gossip Girl's blog again.

She sighed, feeling so much warmth as she let herself be led away by him, the strange brown hair-brown eyed boy.

Nope. She definitely wasn't going to die tonight.

* * *

_To be continued..._

There ya go. Your Chuck and Blair moment, totally spoiler free. Hopefully that's a nice chapter to leave you all with before I enter hell week zone. I promise to update as soon as it's all over.

Revenge mode will be far from now though. Seriously, you guys prefer revenge mode over Chuck and Blair moments? Haha. You all are so evil. :p

Read and Review please! Thank you all so much for your support!


	4. Chapter 4: We're Okay Now

**A/N: Hello World. Miss me? Hopefully so. And Yes, I'm definitely back here in Civilization. Finally, after such a long period of time… The next chapter…Though it's going to be a bit dull since I'm still out of it. It's been HELL. But still so sorry it took so long to write this...**

**Forgive me? haha.**

After countless photo shoots, fashion shows, runways, auditions for radio stations (no unfortunately I had the package but was apparently "redundant" and must master the Art of Knowing What to Say Before Saying It. Haha. Oh well. Worth a shot), final exams, final projects, final papers and final everything…I'm finally THROUGH ALL THIS!!

Oh crap. I still have got a debut to plan. Crap. Crap. Crap.

BUT YES I CANT BELIEVE I'M HERE TO TELL YOU THE TALE THAT I SURVIVED HELL WEEK.

coz if I never updated ever again, then that would be a sign to you all that I died or something.

Okay. Enough babble.

Here we go! Remember, dear missed readers, READ AND REVIEW! Because I love you all for your words and your magnanimous support! 

And I have missed you all as well!

* * *

He looked up from his mahogany table in alarm, startled at the sound of his heavy doors being smashed open so suddenly.

He thought there was an earthquake or something.

And then his eyes just widened in shock and absolute disbelief when he realized who decided to grace him with her presence this morning.

_What the heck? _

Blair Waldorf just stormed in her ex-boyfriend's room without even glancing at the occupant to her side.

Well she definitely created one heck of an earthquake.

Her eyes were on fire. She had a purpose. And she certainly won't let the other guy who ruined her life keep her from getting that purpose.

Her footsteps were heavy and angry as she headed towards his closet doors and furiously slammed them open.

Nate was beyond shocked. He was enraged as well. What the heck was she doing here? And what right did she have to start banging on his doors uninvited?

But he just stood there as he watched in disbelief how Blair began rummaging through his closet, furiously throwing all his clothes in a heap on the floor, so fast-paced were her actions, he thought her hands would be ripped off.

His jaw dropped in disbelief. He was beyond words at what was currently happening.

Finally composing himself, he finally uttered an enraged hiss. "_Blair. What the hell do you think you're –"_

"SHUT UP!!"

Whoa.

Blair Waldorf was a madwoman at that moment, Nate realized as he took in her appearance; tangled brown curls, pale face, disheveled clothes, she even looked thinner. He stepped back at her angered cries towards him.

Finally, she stopped moving. And Nate curiously peered in as to what brought her to her sudden silence. He found out the answer seconds later.

Blair turned back to him and lifted the sweater she held in her hands. The sweater she had given to him almost two years ago, with the heart shaped pin. The heart, she had said, that symbolized her heart that he would wear on his sleeve.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Nate finally spoke up when he realized she was just going to make an exit without ever so bothering to acknowledge him. Seriously, how did she even get in here?

Blair stopped and slowly turned to him, as if finally recognizing there was another presence in the room besides her.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" She retorted, calmly and to Nate's view, quite eerily. But Nate wouldn't let that stood in his way.

"You bang _my _doors; disturb _my _peace without _my _permission and _you _act as if you own this place? _My home? _Seriously, Blair, you are out of it. And you are not welcomed here. Get out."

Blair composure did not flinch for a second. She was used to this. First Nate, then Chuck, then Nate again. She couldn't wait to hear Chuck's next cruel words to her.

"I was just getting to that before you stopped me." She bit back sarcastically. "But you're right Nate." Again that eerie tone of hers. And then she lifted the sweater so he could see it clearly. And then ripped the heart shaped pin from the sweater, dropped the sweater and held the heart shaped pin to his face. "But _this. This _belongs to _me. _I'm taking it back. You and I are finished."

"You didn't realize that the first time I threw you out here, Blair?"

She stood still; his cruel words would not break her now. "No Nate. This is closure."

_What?_

"What?"

Blair took a deep breath and looked straight at him in the eyes, the fire never dying. She had a purpose coming here.

"Every time you would hurt me, I would always forgive you. _Every single time. _Why? Because I always believed you were _my _Prince Charming, _my _one and only." She laughed hollowly. There was nothing funny in this situation though. "But _I _was never that to you. It was always _my _best friend who you saw. Sunshine, beautiful Serena."

His jaw hardened. "Blair – "

"I'm not finished yet!" Blair screamed. She never screamed at him. "No. You shut up. You for once just shut up and listen to _me._" She took another deep breath. "_You _cheated on me. _You _slept with my best friend first. _You _made her go away. _You _hurt me the most."

"So I guess sleeping with _my _best friend was for revenge, huh?" He was furious now. How dare she come here and accuse him. Who the hell did she think she was? "Is that what it is, Blair? Good thinking. You're right. Serena would never do what you did. She isn't as much of a slut as you are."

That was when Blair did the most unthinkable.

She slapped him.

Whoa.

The slap echoed throughout the walls, throughout the house even and he wondered briefly if his mother downstairs would hear it. He held his face, for such a small person, she could definitely hurt someone. And he was definitely beyond all words now. He never thought she would do something like this, even when extremely enraged.

The fire in Blair's eyes doubled. Tripled. He had no idea. At this point, he was frightened of her now.

A long period of silence and tension settled between the used-to-be lovers. So frigid was the room, it was like the Ice Age had decided to befall in the room for them.

"I did not sleep with Chuck for revenge."

Blair finally uttered in the iced silence, so soft, but nevertheless he heard it without shame and with conviction.

"Oh, really? Then what do you call it, Blair, huh?" He wasn't done with her. Slap or no.

"I call it moving on to the next guy who _actually saw me,_ Nate!Chuck _wanted _me, Nate! Chuck _cared _about me! And every single time you would hurt me, it would always be him who would save me!" She was yelling at him so loud now, his mother would definitely hear from below. "He was always there for me. He gave me the simple things that _you _could never do, Nate! For once, I wanted to be with someone who actually wanted me and not my best friend, who would hurt me because he was afraid he'd lose me, because he couldn't really have me!

"Yes, Nate. I really wanted to be with Chuck until _you _came in the picture again. There! It's out. It was him I was seeing after Thanksgiving and not Carter Baizen as everyone else believed."

Nate took a step back, reeling from her words. He couldn't believe it. He would not. But still…here she was…taking her heart back, slapping him and yelling her true feelings. Well if that was her decision, he could respect that no matter how much it hurt and no matter how much he disapproved. Just one more question though…

"So why the hell didn't you tell me? Why did you come back to me?"

"Because Chuck wasn't part of the plan!" Nate stepped back even more. Blair was really raising her voice now. She'd never raised her voice to him. She took a deep breath once more and controlled her voice tone. "Because I had to hold onto you…you were my life long dream, Nate. You were the love of my life, my Prince Charming. It was always Nate and Blair. Not Chuck and Blair. What would everyone think? What would you think?" She laughed that same hollow laugh once again. "But well, I guess with the recent events, my questions got answered right? And you know what Nate? Here's what I learned from my recent downfall."

"What's that?"

"I never deserved to be treated the way you treated me."

Whoa.

"Whatever people say, no matter how you all say and think I am a whore, I am _still _worth it. And you never tried to save me, never tried to really be the Prince Charming I was always waiting for. And I would always be stupid enough to forgive you every time." Her intense stare saw through him. He wanted to flinch, to turn away. But he couldn't. "And you can't even try to see past _my _mistakes and forgive _me_ just this once."

Nate was at a complete loss for words. _Again. _What could he say that could counter all that she said? All that she said was true and her grand entrance, her slap and, her words were a wake up call to him. He realized how selfish he was, how he'd always been a selfish ass. A pang of guilt seeped through him. But it was too late. She had explained her part and she was done. She finally accepting it all, and taking that final bow from his life.

"And that's that, Archibald." And one last gaze, she turned her back on his and began to walk out his door, out of his life.

And it would probably be a long time before she would enter his life again.

That was _if_ she even would.

Minutes, hours, _days _later – he had no idea how long he had been standing there – frozen by her absolute departure, his mother decided to come in, quietly unlike Blair's angry footsteps.

"So it's over between you and Blair?" She asked, her blue orbs gazing into his. She would not believe it, not unless he said so himself.

Nate didn't respond. Silence always meant yes in this family.

That was when Anne Archibald lashed at him with another slap. Not as powerful as Blair's had been only minutes ago, but a slap nonetheless.

"How could let this family fall apart? Your father is still recuperating and this is the news you're planning to tell him when he gets out? How do you think he'll take this? Are you trying to kill your father?"

Nate had had enough. One slap on the face was enough. One person yelling on his face had been enough. His mother did not need to butt in to the things she had no idea whatsoever.

"Look mother, I don't need this right now. I'll fix this okay?"

Anne wasn't convinced but she simply nodded, her eyes already watering at the prospect of her family falling apart.

"Please mom." When she remained standing in his room. "I need to be alone right now. I'll take care of this. Me and Blair always get back together. It'll be like that again."

But none of them thought that it would. But Anne of course was always in denial.

She took a deep breath. "It better be, Nathaniel. May I remind you that it was your own rash actions that got us into this predicament. We're all depending on _you _to get us out of this."

Her eyes filled with such cold disappointment, tearing apart all his insides and he suddenly wished Blair would come running back into his room and slap him again.

That he could take. Not this though.

"And you will make an appearance tonight at the Waldorf's dinner."

_Mother fu – _

He completely forgot about that dinner. Great. Just f-ing _great._

"Unless you'd like to ruin the celebrations by causing another scene."

Nate rolled his eyes, frustrated beyond words. Seriously, his mother needed to give him a break one of these days.

She began to walk out the way she came in but the difference between her and Blair was that she looked back and added another comment,

"I always knew you hanging with that Bass would be trouble. You should've listened to me."

And with that she left him in his misery.

Nate just groaned at her parting words and buried his hands in face.

He so did not need to be reminded of that that other part of his life that was ruined.

No way was he planning to show up at the dinner tonight.

And his mother was just going to have to deal with that fact.

* * *

_10 hours later – Waldorf Penthouse_

She knew she looked exquisite – _ravishing _even – in her emerald Marc Jacobs dress; off-shoulder with a delicate V-curve in front that wasn't quite low; her off-shoulder straps slowly descending into a backless fit that would end at the tip of her lower spine. Her entire back was uncovered technically. Pencil-cut, her dress reached just an inch or two below her knees. Along with her classy Manolo Blahnik black heels and her hair half put up elegantly, she completely was the head-turner for that evening.

She'd never worn anything so bold before and yet she still looked enticing, amazing, and_ beautiful_ in it, without being too vulgar. Even her mother, Eleanor had her jaw-dropped as her daughter descended their steps.

"My daughter was always my best advertisement to fashion line." Her mother bragged proudly to her guests.

Perhaps it was the necklace she donned along with her outfit for that evening: _the Eriksson Beamon necklace. _

Swell. She seriously didn't know what possessed her to wear it this evening. After all, she hadn't spoken or heard from Chuck for three weeks now. It probably had more to do with her being busy secretly trying to make it on time for her appointments and sessions with her new doctor and therapists. But still…a little call from his side of town wouldn't hurt, right? _Whatever. _The park episode was just a phase, a definite urge from her best friend, meaning Chuck was just forced to coo her out of her isolation at the time. He didn't care about her. He had made that _succinctly _clear.

Even though she knew she looked exquisite this evening, all wanted to do was skip this party and just offer the night up to herself. Have a nice bubble bath maybe, watch a couple of Audrey movies and then drift into a peaceful sleep. After this morning's events in the Archibald residence, she felt she deserved some serenity.

She still couldn't believe she did that, by the way.

It has got to be all those sessions.

_Get rid of all your worries._

_It's time to move on to better things._

_Let go of the things that bring you down._

Who would've thought she'd be a fast learner?

Blair smiled gracefully to her guest, ever the perfect hostess, though deep inside she just wanted to have this dinner over with and get to that bubble bath she was planning. She so was _not _in the mood for this right now.

She spotted Anne Archibald just entering her elevator doors and swiftly being greeted by her mother. Missing Nate, she observed. _Good. At least God was nice to her tonight. _

But not nice enough.

_Ding._

"Blair!"

_Oh shit. _

She closed her eyes in dread as she heard Serena's melodic voice flutter across the room to her delicate things.

Serena's presence only meant one thing…

Blair turned and was quickly engulfed in the arms of her best friend, extremely glad to see her, as always. As if they didn't see each other enough.

Serena finally released her and twirled her around with one hand, marveling at Blair's choice of attire this evening.

"Wow, Blair! You look hot! I love it!"

Blair just smiled in half appreciation and half dread. Hey! Maybe _he _wouldn't be here tonight. _Perfect. _She could deal with this evening as long as _he _wasn't here.

"Thanks S."

And then, to her heart's dread, he appeared behind Serena from out of nowhere. Blair's eyes held a certain panic at the sight of Chuck Bass. Dear God, what the hell possessed her to wear this outfit? Oh crap. Her hands touched her necklace, wrapped delicately around her neck. _Shit. _

He didn't speak but she knew he noticed the necklace. _How could he not?_

His intense gaze gave her the goose bumps, his eyes too filled with…

Her eyes swiftly moved anywhere but him and the next thing she saw chilled her to the bones. At the corner, Anne Archibald watched the exchange between the trio, her eyes especially on Blair and Chuck. Her gaze did not falter when Blair caught her staring, instead it's cold, calculating stare boring into Blair, completely catching her off guard.

She turned away quickly to face her best friend, pretending she didn't just see Anne staring at her or that Chuck was there, that she didn't notice him. Serena, however, noticed and thought her sudden cause of uneasiness was because of her disgusting man-whore of a step-brother, standing right next to her.

"Chuck." Serena began with venom. "You found your way. How joyful to the rest of us."

Chuck smirked and put an arm of Serena's shoulder. "Well of course, sis. I am quite the expert on bringing all kinds of joy to those in need of it."

Serena slapped his hand away. "Don't ever call me that again. And the only joy that you could bring me is if you jump off this building and leave the rest of us all alone!" She grabbed Blair's hand, leading Blair away from the evil man-whore of the Upper East Side. "Come on Blair. Stay away from him."

And as Serena led her away to _wherever _Serena thought of at the moment, she could still feel the burning gaze at her back. And she was completely backless already. So that's like _double-burn._

She was glad for the escape.

"Everyone! Please take your seats. Dinner is about to be served."

Her mother just couldn't pick the perfect timing.

Blair and Serena stopped and looked at each other.

Oh this was going to be a long night.

* * *

Much to Blair's dismay and to Chuck's amusement, they had been placed across from each other at the dinner table with Serena by her left side, of course and her mother on her right, the center of the table.

The adults were talking about things she didn't understand, that or maybe her mind was so distracted because of the fact that Chuck was still boring his intense gaze at her that she didn't seem to absorb completely what they were discussing at the moment.

Seriously, she didn't understand this. Three weeks and not a word and then after showing some skin at this stupid dinner party, then he finally decides notice her?

The absolute heinous pig.

Still, the whole staring thing was disturbing.

Disturbing enough to not make her touch her food at all.

Serena noticed her lack of appetite, glared at Chuck for obviously causing her best friend distress and whispered in her ear.

"Eat your food, B."

Blair startled, realized that she hadn't even bothered to touch her food, too troubled by the thought of _Chuck._ She didn't feel like eating anymore. She couldn't. The food didn't look to good to her.

"_Please…" _Serena whispered more desperately when Blair still didn't move.

Blair painfully got her fork and slowly started munching her food, feeling as if she was swallowing rocks instead of mashed potatoes. She could do this. She's been having three weeks of sessions and checkups. She could die if she didn't follow Serena or her doctors.

And then she looked up, avoiding Chuck's observing gaze and straight into the eyes of the silent Anne. Her blue orbs bore through her, accusing her as if telling her she was the whore she never expected to see. Anne's eyes told her everything because it was filled with so much emotion: anger, hatred, disgust, absolution. All for Blair. All because she had slept with the man, seated across from her, staring at her with eyes filled with new-found concern.

And now, she really couldn't munch down another disgusting mashed potato anymore. She turned to her mother and quietly whispered to her.

"May I be excused?"

Eleanor was startled. "Why, dear? You haven't even finished your meal." Eleanor pointed to the not even half-finished meal. "Finish your dinner, Blair."

"I just need some air _please_."

And that was when her mother finally gazed into her daughter's eyes. Last time she heard that voice, Blair had broken down before her and asked for a flight to France.

"Alright dear. But be quick."

"Thank you."

And with that she got up from her seat and made her way to her elevator doors, with the rest of the people staring after her in shock and curiosity.

"Oh, don't worry about her. She's just going to get something from her room. Carry on with your dinner." Eleanor pacified.

Serena didn't buy it. And when she glanced across the man she hated the most, she saw he didn't either.

* * *

_Idiot. _Yep. That was what she was.

Because it was blistering cold and she had to pick 'being alone' _outside, _clad in her incredibly backless dress.

Well if she wanted some air, she definitely got a whole lot of it.

Suddenly, a huge cloth covered her heavily from behind.

"What are you doing out here alone in the cold?"

His voice was so…_deep. Velvety..._He was here again, rescuing her. She couldn't help it, her knees just wobbled at the sound of his voice now surrounding her. It was his coat that he had draped over her cold body and suddenly, _his _scent filled her, bringing shivers to her spine…

_But good shivers. Definitely good shivers..._

"Blair?" He now stood beside her, waiting for her to respond. She had been so transfixed by his presence; she didn't realize she had been staring dumbly at him.

_Idiot. _Well, he was one to appreciate her wide doe-eyes staring at him for the first time in the entire evening.

He chuckled. Another deep chuckle. Another reason to send her _good _shivers to her spine. Seriously what was happening to her?

"Missed me?" Half-joke, half-truth. After all, he hadn't called for three weeks after their 'supposed' truce. Well she wasn't about to let him know that…

_That what? _That she really _did _miss him?...

"Please." Was all Blair could say.

Chuck just smirked. "Pleasing you is something that would bring me tantamount of pleasure."

Blair finally turned to him to him, a new found annoyance in her eyes, all the shivers gone. At least, that's what _she _thought. "Last time I checked, you had me erased from your book of conquests and that you or anyone else for that matter wouldn't want me ever again." Chuck's smirk completely wiped off from his face. "I get it, Chuck. I really do. Now I _really _want to be as far away from you because that's what 'we' agreed on, remember? And here you come trying to be as near me as possible."

She paused slightly out of breath from her continuous banter.

"So let me ask you, _Bass. _What in the hell is your deal exactly?"

For a minute, Chuck just stood dumbfounded until her words sank in him. He finally found his voice and said…

"Blair, I'm sorry..."

"Sorry? Yeah. _Sure. _You didn't call or visit or _anything _for three weeks, Chuck! Three weeks! And here I thought we were _okay _at least. I mean I can't believe you still remember that _stupid _childhood memory or whatever." Blair was exposing all her emotions at the moment, and she was caught up in them, she really didn't care anymore. A rare feat for the fallen queen. "But I guess that's just me, right? So you know what Chuck, just stay away from me. Oh! Wait. You've already done that. Great. Thanks _so much _then."

And with that she turned from him and began to walk off in the other direction, letting her feet lead her to God knows where. She would've continued on, if only she didn't hear his deep voice, soft, concerned, gentle behind her, making her freeze and stop whatever notion of leaving she had in mind.

"I didn't know how to act around you after that."

She slowly turned. Now she saw, it was his turn to be looking everywhere except her.

"We've hurt each other too much, Blair. And then, at the park…" He didn't know how to say it, she realized. And she didn't realize, she was slowly walking back towards him. She heard him sigh softly. "I didn't know if you'd be okay with me after that. If _we'd _be okay after _everything_ we've done to each other."

He finally looked at her, his eyes intensely staring at her, as if he could see through and through her, always plunging deep within her soul. Her heart hammered within her chest and if she let it, she'd faint, overwhelmed by his stares.

"I really am sorry for the things I said to you that night. I was upset. Nathaniel had just thrown a punch at me over a _girl. _And you just had to walk in there, coming to me as your second choice." Hurt filled his eyes. Hurt that she had never noticed before. "I was always the second choice."

She understood then. Why he had done everything he did. She understood the feeling of being secondly chosen over a blonde best friend. She'd felt that too countless of times. What she didn't realize until now was that she had done the same thing to a person who felt the exact same thing too.

Blair was speechless. Never had he explained himself to anyone. Never had he exposed his feelings for anyone. But he had now, and countless times before that.

_Except for her. Only for her._

She gently took his hands in hers. She saw the shock that filled his eyes at her touch. But she continued to look within his deep brown orbs.

"We're okay _now, _Chuck."

He didn't know how to say 'thank you' to anyone, much less to a girl, even if that girl was Blair. He didn't know how to deal with situations or moments like these. And he was afraid he'd ruin the moment. So instead he squeezed her hands tighter to his and he let his eyes give away his gratitude.

She understood.

And suddenly, his limo had made its way to them, ready to take them away wherever he wanted. And he wanted to bring her with him.

Chuck gave her a look. "Come with me."

Blair's eyes held a panic gaze in them. She looked back up to her building, knowing it's occupants would wonder of her disappearance.

"Serena would…"

"…be fine." He finished.

"…be furious." She corrected.

Chuck smiled. "I'll take care of dear ol' sis. Come with me."

After what seemed an eternity, she finally said softly,

"Alright."

And with their hands still intertwined, he led her into his limo, never taking his eyes off hers. She broke the moment when she commented,

"Serena wouldn't like it if you called her that again."

He laughed. A melodious sound to her ears.

"Tough."

The doors of the limo closed and went off it's way to wherever they wanted to.

And Blair thought as she gazed out the window, her hand still held within his that perhaps tonight wasn't so bad after all.

* * *

_To be continued..._

And there it is. FINALLY. the fourth chapter. Next chapter will be up soon I promise.

It's a little dull coz I'm still out of it. Next chapter will be so much better. Hopefully.

OMG people! April 21 is approaching and I just wish the days would hurry up because I really cant wait to watch it because seriously, WHAT EXACTLY WILL HAPPEN?!

And this whole gay stuff floating around everywhere...UGH. GOD. it's killing me. RAWR.

Well who cares. I just hope Jenny dies soon. HAHA.

ANYWAY dont forget READ AND REVIEW. :) love you all. :)


	5. Chapter 5: Regretful Kisses

****

A/N: Okay first of all, I'd like to say thank you to all those people who read and reviewed. Thank you so much for the support. Without you guys, this story wouldn't continue...Or it would...Just wouldn't be as fun as it is now. Your comments make my day. Really, coz they're like so cute and hilarious and brilliant and I love them all.

Thank you. I know I don't exactly reply (I'm shy… bwahahahaha. WOW. Watta excuse) but still, I love them. THANKS Y'ALL!

Next, PEOPLE sheesh! Hold your horse's man! Y'all are like so excited. HAHAHAHA. I know you're all itching for someone to know about Blair's little thing, but…HOLD ON! HAHA. I mean the whole confrontation thing is like practically the climax of the story! I mean there wouldnt be a story anymore if people found out coz that's the thing. So no need to rush. Besides, there are a bunch of other things I want to try out. Oh! And someone suggested this GENIUS IDEA EVER! THANKS! And I think I'm planning to use that idea, alter it a bit but you know… COZ IT'S TOTAL GENIUS. Hope you don't mind. I'll credit you don't worry. THANKS. You guys have such wonderful suggestions, really. I think I'll just use them all. :D

The whole Anne thing. Well I've always hated her in the show. She's so manipulative and so…UGH. I hate her. It's like 'dude. What's wrong with you?' I always found her a bit creepy too. Times like that, yeah I do feel sorry for Nate… (Just not sorry enough coz he's a selfish ass, no offense Nate fans!)

As for the dress from the previous chapter, well I'm not sure if it's like the one from Atonement (someone mentioned that) I don't know coz I haven't watched it yet! Though I want to. HAHA. But if it is, then wow am I psychic (kidding! HAHA)

Okay. I'll shut up now. On with the show!

READ AND REVIEW PLEASE. - Because you know I love them. Love you all!

Enjoy!

* * *

Maybe the limo idea wasn't such a good thing after all.

Chuck Bass was back in his suite, it was mid-morning and most of his stuff was packed and ready to go for movement. He glanced at his baggage - albeit little as it was - but as of the moment, he wasn't even thinking or worrying about whole Vander-Bass-family-under-one-roof idea. No. He was more worried about what had transpired _earlier _this morning on the hood of his limo.

He was gazing out his window, scotch in hand, and a frown on his handsome features, the butterflies revived, soaring and roaming all over his stomach once more. He was trying to drown them all with his scotch. But then again, scotch just never worked. Then and now. Well except for that one time when he…

_Stop it. _

He didn't want to dwell on _that _issue again, now that everything was fixed with Blair. Speaking of, last night was…

And then, butterflies rose again in absolute elation and excitement.

_Shit. _

He was an idiot. This time it was his fault. Okay fine. Maybe it was hers. If she hadn't been so…_alluring…_so…_irresistible…_so…_No. _Still his fault…No. Hers…

_Shit._

He rubbed his face with his tired hand in frustration for the umpteenth this morning._ This was not happening all over again!_

Replaying the events of last night in his head, they had escaped that insuffarable dinner party, roamed all over New York City with his limo, just talking and laughing and catching up. He had missed her. And he was so grateful that she'd forgiven him for everything he'd done to her. He resolved to wanting to make things up with her. He missed his Blair. They had been friends before the whole Chuck/Blair/Nate saga and it was great that she was back in his life again.

He didn't think he was _that_ lonely without Blair and Nate until last night.

They stopped at some sort of pier though near Brooklyn. Isolated, quiet, just near the Brooklyn Bridge, overlooking the city. New York was amazing at night, the lights, the sounds, _Blair; _it all kind of gave him a sense of peace. And Blair was just beautiful that evening, with her daring, 'come-hither' dress that he wanted to rip out and that smile she always flashed at him whenever he said something charming or funny or heinous.

They laid side by side on the hood of his limo, watching as the city lights glazed over their eyes, watching as the stars shone brightly above them, listening to all the sounds around them. They had been silent, just lying there, together, side by side, letting everything continue to roam around them. It was bliss. And peaceful. They stayed like that the entire night.

He would sometimes gaze at his companion from time to time. She would always have that faraway look in her eyes, and he wondered what was up. He knew that look. It always meant something was troubling her. But he figured he'd ask her in another time though, not during a moment like this.

Blair had fallen asleep first. He just watched in wonderment as she did. When he started to feel like a stalker, he would return his gaze to the city. And then her sleeping head just had to _land _on his shoulder right then and there! Can't say he was more than startled. That was probably the first time the butterflies returned full blast. But he didn't push her sleeping form away, didn't crush the butterflies immediately. Instead, he carefully shifted his form closer to hers so she'd be more comfortable and he just let her head rest on his shoulder. He loved the feeling anyway.

He had fallen into a blissful sleep after that.

Chuck had awoken first of course, shifting slightly which caused the beautiful girl in his arms to awaken too. He cursed himself silently because he woke her up but then the first thing she did was look up at him and smile that smile that made his _always _made his heart stop for approximately 10 seconds or more.

Whoa.

That was the second time the butterflies went full blast on his face. Really. If he woke up like this every morning, no one would hear him complain ever again.

Blair turned her gaze away from his and squealed in delight.

They were just in time for sunrise.

"Chuck! Look! It's beautiful." She said. "I've never seen the sunrise before…" He saw how her eyes just sparkled in happiness at the mere thought of actually witnessing a beautiful sunrise.

Neither had he seen any either. And God, was he the luckiest asshole in the entire city to ever experience such a moment with the girl of his dreams.

As the sun rose, its orange rays slowly filling their wonder and vision, she slowly turned to him, her big doe-eyes gazing deeply upon him. Their faces were mere inches now. God…he was just breathless, staring at her, her staring at him. And Chuck Bass does _not_ do breathless.

That was the third time the butterflies hit and score.

"Chuck…" She whispered, her eyes still sparkling from joy. "Thank you for bringing me here. Thank you for _everything._"

_She was so beautiful. _Chuck thought. Never mind what he said at the bar that night, she would always be the most beautiful in his eyes. Especially now, with the sunrise, with them on the hood of his limo, overlooking the city, with her eyes solely on him.

Her lips were so…_pale. _But still delicate… _irresistible_. When was the last time she had been kissed?

He didn't have to think for long because he couldn't hold it in any longer.

He leaned in closer…and closer…

Until he met her lips to an earth-shattering kiss.

After a second of shock, she kissed him back with the same fervor and passion he had, much to his glee. He pulled her closer to him, wanting to feel every part of her close to him, never wanting to let her go.

_God. He missed this. He missed her._

Yeah. And the whole not wanting her speech a month ago? Gone out the window, thrown in the sea, crushed by the newly resurrected butterflies. God. And he didn't even care at that moment, he wanted to take her completely here, now, on the hood of his limo, he didn't care. He wanted her. _All of her. _

And he would have if she hadn't pulled away so abruptly.

"Chuck…" She looked so frightened. He wanted to take her in his arms, wanted to wash her fears away.

"What's wrong?" He asked gently.

"We can't."

And that was when the moment died.

She saw the hurt that had flashed momentarily in his eyes. "Please understand…Not again…" Her voice felt so fragile, so broken, just like the beautiful moment they just had. "Too much has happened…we can't, Chuck…we can't…"

She was begging him to understand, hurt was in her eyes too, he saw. It wasn't just him after all. Blair Waldorf didn't do begging. But here she was begging and pleading with him. She did have a point anyway. How could he not understand when they had both been hurt before? Did he really want to go back that road again? Really? Did he?

"Okay…"

Nope. Definitely did not want to go down that road again. And everything was getting better with Blair again. He did not want to ruin their newly found, albeit fragile friendship.

He gently took her hand, understanding and emotion in his eyes. "Let's go home now, shall we?"

She smiled dazzlingly at him and accepted the offer of letting him take her home. "Lets."

And with that, they had jumped off the hood of his limo, went inside, and finally road back to their homes.

And that was the story of how Chuck was an absolute idiot now.

He _never, ever _should have kissed her. _Stupid. Stupid. STUPID butterflies._

He downed the scotch, hoping the butterflies would morbidly die in his stomach.

_Ring. Ring. _

"Father." He said as he answered his phone. He closed his eyes in distress, a groan just about to emanate from him.

"Right." He listened more. "Yeah, I'll be there."

He shut his phone and suddenly had the urge to it thrown on the wall across from him. He was so in deep Blair mode, he completely forgot that he had to get a move on with his luggage.

Now that he remembered it, he was just not looking forward to the merging of his family anymore. Good thing he packed light, just in case he wanted to return to his own humble abode.

And as much as he perverted himself around the topic, no, he seriously did not want to move in with Serena Vander-Bitch-Woodsen at all.

_Great. Perfect._

This probably was not going to be a good day after all.

* * *

"Oh, isn't this marvelous?!"

Chuck just rolled his eyes, Serena, beside him, just groaned in disgust and Eric had that horrified look on his face as if he wanted to just jump down the building at the moment.

Chuck definitely wanted to do the same. And _no. _This was _not _marvelous at all. But he couldn't say that to Lily straight to her face or else his father would pummel him in front of his new family. And Chuck didn't want that either.

But at least, Serena was allowed to say something. And say something was what she did.

"Mom," She began with that condescending tone of hers. "Don't you think it's a little too early to move in?" She glanced at his father. "No offense, Mr. Bass. This place is great and all but I mean you guys aren't officially even married yet."

Bart Bass just chuckled at what he thought was concern and thoughtfulness coming from the blonde princess. "Your mother was the one who insisted this to happen. So I definitely had nothing to do with it." And the slinked his arm on Lily's waist and kissed her on the cheek. "But whatever is her wish is my command." And then they both laughed at their own little joke.

Chuck's jaw just dropped to the floor, Serena turned away in horrified disgust and Eric's eyes just widened in horror, disbelief, mortification and dread all at the same time. It was quite amusing to anyone else other than the new step siblings.

"So we'll be having our first family dinner tonight in our new home in celebration of our newly merged family and the birthday of my new step-daugther, Serena." Bart announced.

Wow. That just made things _a whole lot better. _

The trio just groaned in response.

Lily gave them a pointed look. "Oh come on. What's with the face? Seriously weren't you two the ones who encouraged me to go on with this?"

Serena just glared at her mother. Lily just rolled her eyes, ignoring her daughter. "Fine. Whatever. Look, if it'll make you feel any better, you can invite Blair over." A light bulb clicked in her brain. "Oh that's perfect! She can sleepover and celebrate the festivities with us. She is lonely up at that penthouse right?" She didn't even let Serena speak. "Plus it's your birthday tomorrow and since you don't want to have a party which I keep insisting on, then might as well have Blair over." Lily ended with a 'and that's that' tone, smirked in triumph as she came up with such a genius idea and placed her hands in her hips.

Serena just stared back at her mother, completely mortified but Chuck could see that Serena was entertaining the idea and was about to give in.

"Fine. I'll call her." Serena said with finality. But deep down, she was happy that her best friend was going to be with her on this nightmare that was this evening's dinner.

Chuck, on the other hand, was not so thrilled about the idea. Given the way the butterflies kept spewing out of nowhere and the memory of their first kiss since _forever_, Chuck wasn't ready to see the petite brunette so soon.

Not that he could stop it of course.

"Father, don't you think it's a little inappropriate that an outsider would barge in on such an intimate family dinner?" Well he could try right? Serena immediately caught on to what he was trying to do and absolutely would not let him have it. She glared at him before she interjected.

"Mr. Bass," She sighed quite dramatically. Chuck turned to her, eyes bulging. "Blair is far from an _outsider._ To even suggest that is a real insult on _my_ part." She glared at Chuck._ "_Blair is my best friend and my sister. And she is more than welcome in the VanderWoodsen's more than anyone. She's like family to _us._" Us, meaning before Bart and Chuck came along.

_Bitch. _Chuck thought with venom. The perfect little actress. She was even tearing up already! God. Chuck hated her.

And to add up to his frustration, Lily agreed! _Oh! Mother fu – _

"Yes, Bart. Serena and Blair are inseparable these days. Besides, I was meaning to invite Blair over because I have a surprise for her. And I wanted to announce it later at the dinner."

Bart just smiled fondly at the two blondes. "Well if that's the case, then Ms. Waldorf is welcome to this _new _family as well. If she's family to you, then she's family to me as well. It'd be like another birthday gift to you." He smiled fondly at her – if his monotonous face ever knew such emotion – and gave Chuck a pat on the shoulder. "My son will just have to deal."

Serena smiled in triumph, seeing as how she won this round. Thank God it was her birthday tomorrow.

Chuck just glared angrily at her.

"Thank you, Mr. Bass."

"Please." Bart insisted. "Call me _Dad."_

Seriously, the horror just would _not_ stop!

Chuck just wanted to hurl all of the contents of his stomach at this point.

* * *

Blair just wanted to hurl all of the contents of her stomach at this point.

What had she been thinking? Riding the limo with Chuck Bass, spending the night with him and then…then…

Ugh. God. Not again. No. No. NO! Not again! They've been through this already, hadn't her heart learned enough? As much as she missed Chuck _as a friend, _she did not want to be involved him _like that _again. Not because she was disgusted or anything, but because she was still too hurt from all that's happened.

Forgiving was a big check on her checklist but forgetting was definitely not, _yet_.

And that was still going to take a long time before it happened.

But God. Here she was again…doing the exact same thing...As if she hadn't learned anything at all! She couldn't believe it.

_She kissed Chuck Bass! _

Well technically, _he _kissed her but her response? Kiss him back? Inexcusable! Good thing she got back to her senses and stopped any of it from going further.

And what if she didn't?...

_Ugh. _She'd rather not even go there.

Blair was back in her bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror, disgust reflecting in her eyes and in the mirror.

Maybe Chuck was right. Maybe she really was one heck of a slut.

She glanced at the toilet bowl. She swiftly turned her gaze away as if the mere look burned her.

_No. You've worked too hard. You've held your ground. Three weeks was painful enough…No._

She breathed, trying to be strong and not give in to temptation. She was mentally giving herself reasons why she shouldn't do it. She was on reason number five when her phone rang.

A picture of her beautiful blonde best friend flashed on the screen. _Look. A sign._

"S, I can explain last night I swear." Blair rushed out as soon as she answered the phone, not letting Serena talk first.

"Uh…Okay." Serena droned, as if she had forgetten that little issue. Which she did...And Blair just had to remind her right?

"But that's not the reason you called…"

"Nope." And then, Serena screamed on the phone suddenly. Blair cringed from from her best friend's screams.

"S. Please. I don't think I can stand long enough to get hearing aids if you keep this up." Blair smiled at her own joke. But Serena wasn't in the chipper mood she usually was.

"Sorry. It's just _we_ just all moved in together today…" We as in the newest Vander Bass family. "And there's this family dinner tonight and I feel like suffocating myself because of the horror….So…"

"So…?"

"Will you please come over and have dinner with us? And sleep over too? Please. Please. Please."

Blair's eyes widened at the idea. She f-ing kissed Chuck Bass for crying out loud! Not that Serena knew about that, or needed to be informed about that...But still! The same Chuck Bass who she will be seeing tonight and be sleeping over under his roof now, apparently. Before she could say her excuse and reject the offer, Serena beat her to it.

"Look I know what Chuck did to you, but you're not allowed to go _anywhere _near him. I absolutely won't allow it okay B? I promise. I really need you tonight. Please?"

Damn it. Serena just had to beg her, did she? And who was she to resist? She really owed Serena a lot already and no amount of gift giving would ever pay off her gratitude to the blonde.

Speaking of gifts, wasn't it Serena's birthday tomorrow?

_Oh shit!_

"Fine. I'll be there. Just pick me up later okay?"

"Thanks B! I love you!"

"Love you too S." And then they both hung up.

Blair sighed as she dropped her phone lifelessly on the sink counter. She felt so stressed, felt so tired and suddenly depressed.

She kissed Chuck Bass this morning and now she was gong to come face to face with him again tonight and yes, he will be seeing her in her nightgown since she was going to sleepover.

She really, truly, utterly felt like the whore Chuck described. It was only about time he put into action his_ 'rode hard and put away wet'_ theory.

Forgetting all her life's danger, forgetting all about her three week sessions, that thought alone forced her to kneel down on the marble floor, open her mouth and stick her finger in her throat.

_Once you start again, you won't stop…_Her doctor had warned her.

She understood why that was now.

Because she had no plans in doing so.

* * *

_5 hours later – The Palace _

"Hey birthday girl!" Dan called out to his beautiful girlfriend as she seated herself on the stone benches, wrapped in one of his warm wool blankets.

They were on the steps of the Palace, having found no other convenient place to hold their little pre-birthday party slash rendezvous at such late notice. It was a simple arrangement really. They made use of whatever resources they had around them and voila! Along with some warm coffee, some wool blankets and some bread, it seemed like the perfect picnic spot, despite the curious glances they received from incoming people from the hotel. They ignored these curious glances of course. Didn't even notice them. They were in their own world whenever they were together.

Plus Serena was privileged to do things like this anyway.

She smiled dazzlingly at him as he approached her, gift in hand and every time she did, his heart just stopped for a second or two. It was like his world stopped whenever she would smile at him like that.

"Hey." Serena called back. "What's that?" She pointed the little box he held in his hands.

"Nothing much. Just my little surprise for the birthday girl." He grinned adorably before he slid himself next to her, and she wrapped him in a bundle of wool blankets. "Wow. Thanks. Now I do _not _feel the blistering cold _at all now. _Thanks."

Serena just laughed at his witty remarks. "Isn't it a bit too early for my birthday gift though?"

"Oh no. This is like a pre-birthday gift. Tomorrow I'll be giving you my real gift." He made a motion to open the box to reveal the cutest cake delicately held within. It even had a strawberries on top and a little 'Happy Birthday, Serena' icing on. It was just a small mini - cake but cute nevertheless and Serena loved it. The cake was of vanilla flavor and chocolate frostings, both Serena's favorite. The strawberries though were Dan's favorite. And if she wouldn't eat them, well then, he most probably would, with pleasure. Serena laughed as he explained this. She loved his gift and couldn't wait for tomorrow. They were so simple and yet, they held so much meaning, held that certain perfection Serena always desired for and which others would never understand.

She was happier when things were given to her in the simplest form.

Dan carefully placed two candles and lit them. "Well birthday girl, happy birthday. Make your wish."

Serena kissed him on the cheek before she blew out her candles and closed her eyes to make her wish. After a moment, she opened them, a new sparkle in her eyes. Dan was curious.

"What did you wish for?"

She slapped him playfully on the shoulder. "I can't tell you that or else it wouldn't come true!"

They laughed and tickled each other for awhile until they calmed down and let the soft winter breeze gently flow through their faces.

"How's home?" Serena quietly asked.

_"Home_." Dan echoed with heaviness etched on his voice. Serena faced him, concerned. "Well Dad has this new girlfriend, _Becks_, who might possibly be my new stepmother. She's nice but it's just…weird seeing her _early morning _in the kitchen making _waffles._" He sighed and shook the image from his mind. "And Jenny…" He shook his head again, disappointed filling his handsome features. "Well Jenny's… _different _these days."

"I'm really sorry."

"No. _I'm _really sorry." Dan forced. "I never thought she would do something like that. Act like those girls, even _worse_ than them. And to _Blair! _Has Blair ever poured yogurt on people's heads and stepped down on them completely in front of the _entire school_?" Dan asked, almost rhetorically. Serena silently shook her head. "Yeah, thought so too." There was a long pause. "She once said that she would never change even if she hung out with people like those. And now, she's become _one of them._ I don't know how to look at her anymore."

Serena moved closely to Dan, trying to comfort him. "I'm really sorry Dan. I know you didn't want this to happen. Even I don't know how to deal. Jenny was such a nice person. How she made that 180 degree change overnight, I'll never know."

Dan sighed heavily. "I take it your home is as chipper as mine." He remarked sarcastically.

Serena groaned. "Ugh! We're all moving in together. Tonight's like our 'first dinner' or whatever. I am so dreading it. Already feel suffocated just thinking about it. Thank God, Blair will be there tonight. She's sleeping over."

Dan spun his head in confusion. "Wait. Blair? Coming to sleep over at your newly merged family's house…with the ass that practically ruined her life sitting across dinner from her? Five dollars bet, breakfast will be World War III. I am glad I am not you now."

"Chuck is not going to touch her, or go near her or even talk to her. I'll make sure of it. Another reason why this whole new family just makes me want to hurl."

"Hey." Dan said comfortingly. "If Chuck tries to do anything, just let me know and I'll gladly rush over and give him another black eye he deserves. He's an _ass._"

"Oh thank you, my Prince Charming!" Serena exclaimed playfully. "Now I feel oh-so-safe now with my Knight-in-Shining-Armor ready to rescue me at the sound of my call."

"And rescue you I will indeed." Dan mocked the voice of a Prince. They both laughed. And suddenly, their eyes just met, their faces were mere inches from each other. The world just stopped turning completely and it was just the two of them. Their hearts soaring.

Dan pulled her to an empowering kiss.

Here, on a beautiful winter night, on the eve of her birthday, it all felt so perfect. They just couldn't get enough of each other but were too tame to let their actions get beyond them in a public place. They were too private, too intimate. They'd never let details of their relationship get out in the public, even if the public made their speculations.

But they kissed and melted into one another, their hearts soaring and beating louder than ever. If only this moment lasted forever…

The sound of Serena's cell phone ringing rudely interrupted their sweet and intimate moment.

"Don't answer that." Dan whispered.

Serena didn't want to but nevertheless, reluctantly pulled away. "I'm so sorry." Annoyed, she picked up her phone and angrily answered it, much to Dan's amusement.

"What?"

"Oh I'm sorry, there is a dinner scheduled for this family in like 15 minutes and you or Blair are both not here yet." Lily scolded her daughter on the phone. Serena rolled her eyes.

"Okay, okay. I'm on my way." And then she hung up.

She turned to Dan, with an apologetic look on her face. Dan understood immediately.

"You have to go." It wasn't a question.

"I'm sorry." Serena said regretfully. "Okay here. I'll put this cake in the refrigerator tonight, meet you tomorrow morning and we'll eat it together and you can give me that other gift you were saying."

Dan laughed. "Alright. It's fine. Go."

She sweetly kissed him again. "I have to pick up Blair first." She gave him another kiss and giggled. "I'll call you between every course."

"Okay."

"Bye. I love you."

This time Dan pulled her into another long, heated, passionate kiss before he let her go. "I'll clean up. Go ahead. I love you too."

God. She hated leaving him in moments like this.

* * *

_30 minutes later – Waldorf residence_

_Ding._

Surprisingly, the Waldorf penthouse was silent and dark when she stepped out of the elevator doors. Not a movement in sight and all the lights were turned off. Where was everybody? Serena thought.

"Blair?"

No answer. Nothing. Nada. Serena tried again. "Blair?" She tried again. Still nothing. And it was beginning to creep her out. Because the only thing she could hear were her footsteps and her breathing which both seemed so heavy to her at the moment.

The Waldorf residence never looked so empty and…_haunted…_

She tried calling Blair's phone, just in case maybe Blair wasn't home and was elsewhere and forgot to let Serena know. And then Serena could just get the hell out of this place.

No answer as well. _Damn it._

So Serena only had one other option. And that was to search the newly haunted house that was Blair's.

God, if she just didn't love her best friend so much…

She slowly ascended the spiral staircase and all she could see above was pitch black. Seriously. Where the hell was everybody? And where was Blair? This was so creeping her out.

Alarm bells were suddenly ringing in her head as she now approached her best friend's room. _No. _Serena wouldn't let the thought – the _mere idea - _enter her mind. Blair would never do _that _again…

But the alarms bells kept ringing and that was enough to quench her fear of the dark, and walk faster to Blair's door. She knocked loudly.

No answer. Not that she expected any.

So Serena walked in to a room which was dark as the rest of the penthouse. _No Blair. _But the alarm bells kept ringing in her head louder than ever and her heart was doubling its pace in trepidation and fear.

And ever so slowly, Serena made her head turn to the white bathroom door of Blair's, just across from her. She had grown to hate that door in the years that have passed, knowing of the dark secrets it lay beneath it. Serena's eyes were watering up as she slowly – _painfully – _walked towards it.

She prayed to all the gods there were, that her best friend was _not _behind that door she had grown to hate.

Serena shut her eyes as if pained as her hands touched the cold handle of Blair's bathroom door. _Please no…Don't let her be in here…please…_

After what seemed an eternity, she finally gained the courage to open it.

_Oh God._

Looks like her prayers weren't going to be answered tonight.

"Blair!"

She didn't even know her tears were falling as she run over to the almost lifeless, hunched figure of her best friend.

Blair looked up to the sound of feet and was startled to see the figure of her best friend, blurred by her tears and her headache.

She felt so weak right now…

The pristine bathroom reeked with stench but Serena didn't care. Serena carefully took Blair in her arms.

"Why?"

Blair's answer was a raspy whisper. "I couldn't stop…I'm so tired…"

Serena hugged her even tighter, her tears pouring endlessly, blurring her vision. This was not the birthday present she expected and wanted to open.

"Please…" Serena begged. "Please Blair…_Don't give up…_"

"_Don't leave me like this okay?...Please…You're beautiful…" _Serena's words drilled in Blair's brain and she sobbed on her best friend's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry…I don't know how to stop anymore…I'm so sorry you had to see me like…_this…_" And then, she sobbed even more on Serena.

They both cried on each other's shoulders for a long while.

After forever, Serena finally let go of Blair and wiped the tears from her eyes, attempted to smile. "Let's get out of here, okay?" It was just like Thanksgiving.

Blair just nodded, weak but grateful. Serena stood up and helped Blair stand then turned to silently clean up the mess Blair made, flush the toilet several times and wipe the floor with the nearest rug.

Blair slowly washed her face and silently changed her filthy wardrobe. Serena quietly packed Blair's bags.

When they were through with their tasks, they turned to each other.

Serena hugged Blair once more, both girls filled with heavy emotion. When had it come to this?

"Stay with me, okay? I love you, B."

And with no more words needed to be exchanged, they walked out Blair's dark penthouse, hand-in-hand, with Serena trying to give strength to Blair.

They cried silently in the cab as it sped away to Serena's new home.

The night wasn't over though.

For they had another obstacle to overcome till this tiresome day finally ended.

* * *

_To be continued..._

Okay. Kind of a long chapter. Sorry. HAHA. Well hope y'all loved it and please READ and REVIEW.

Sorry for the dings and the ring rings...I didnt know how else to describe stuff like that.

Anyway till the next chapter which I'll be updating as soon as possible.

OMG. Just a few more days and Gossip Girl is back. I can't wait. AAAHH. haha. Crap. I'm so excited. SHIT. haha.


	6. Chapter 6: The Chuck Bitch Project

**A/N: **Alright people, I'm back! Every one of you seen the latest episode? HAHA.

A few side comments before you read:

1. WHY WAS THERE NO BLAIR – CHUCK SCENE?! UGH. Hopefully next episode they put in SOMETHING right?!

2. The title of the show was the Blair Bitch Project, why was it all about JENNY F-ING HUMPHREY?! I understand that perhaps the episode was supposed to justify Jenny's side and make us all understand why she does the things she does but… GOD. Bitch. I understand her and feel sorry for her but God, she does not have to make a 180 degree change and bitch about town. WHATEVER. Her life. Don't care. She'll fall sooner or later.

3. Rufus! Poor, poor Rufus! I feel so bad for him! God. _Jenny. So ungrateful._

4. Chuck! OMFG. I felt so bad for him too! S just went a little too far with the whole _"You disgust me Chuck! How dare you involve Eric in something like this! No wonder you're friendless and girlfriendless, even your father expects the worst from you!" _Ouch. That scene and the one with Bart were the most painful scenes ever in that episode. Yes. Even more painful than Jenny's trauma-rama with her dad.

5. Blair. No matter how much she bitches around town, she's still at the losing end. I feel so bad for her too. Second only to Chuck. She's really struggling and those copy-cats, no originality girls are just so f-ing mean.

6. Georgina. In the books she's just INSANE. People, just read it. It's actually entertaining. VERY different from the show, but hilarious entertaining no matter what. Can't wait till the next episode. Hope they put a Blair Chuck scene in.

7. Favorite quote: S – "Okay. Compliment me. Tell me my hair looks beautiful." _Beat. _B – "But your hair looks _disgusting…_did you even shower?" OMFG. Hilarious. Blair is so cute!

Okay enough. Enjoy the story.

* * *

"Where in the world have you two been?"

The two girls froze at the doorway at the sound of Lily's stern voice echoing through their ears. They looked at each other, both thinking of an excuse that would explain their tardiness.

The Vander-Bass family was now lounging on their living room couches, a signal that dinner was officially over and that they were merely spending some 'quality' time together. There was even a pianist playing soft, classical tunes for them while waiters served them with champagne and desserts. It was like a mini-dinner party.

Only Lily could pull off something like that and still look _un-_ridiculous whatsoever.

Serena and Blair stood before them now, and everyone's heads were turned to them. Chuck had been whispering something funny to Eric only moments before he now directed his attention to the two tardy 'delinquents'.

Well his gaze was more directed on the brunette he sort of had a crush on again, but whatever.

"Well?" Lily continued as the girls remained silent at Lily's earlier scolding.

"CAKE!" Serena suddenly exclaimed as she finally got an idea with the box of cake she held in her hands. Blair whirled to her with a WTF look. Coz, uhm…No that wasn't exactly the excuse_ she_ was thinking of.

Lily and everybody else had the same look at Serena's exclamation.

Suddenly Blair felt shoulders heavy at the weight of her best friend's arms. She was still weak from her earlier relapse but she tried not to show it though by exuding a look of annoyance at her best friend's heavy touch.

"Blair decided to surprise me earlier by giving me cake for my birthday." Serena rushed out. Blair's look of annoyance turned into that of okay-approval. Well it wasn't the best excuse…

…"I had a taste of it and then my stomach hurt and then I was throwing up all over the place!" Okay now, maybe it was.

Blair continued Serena's 'tragedy cake problem'. "It was so horrible. I had to clean up all the mess and nurse Serena a bit. I am _so _sorry, Lily! I had _no _idea their cakes were so…" Blair conjured up a disgusted look. "…_bad." _

Serena caught Blair's eye. "Thank God Blair was there or else I wouldn't have made it!" Later on, they would definitely high five each other at their public display of absolute drama.

Chuck's eyebrows rose at their story, Eric and Bart just gave out a look of concern and Lily was just absolutely horrified.

"Well if that's the case, thank you Blair." She then turned her attention to Bart. "Perhaps we should be more careful with whom to get the cake from."

"Of course." Bart said simply.

Blair and Serena finally seated themselves among the Vander-Bass family. Blair caught on Chuck's gaze and immediately turned her attention elsewhere. The kiss and her earlier relapse were still lingering in her mind and now she was face to face with the cause of it all, she just felt like running home and back into her bathroom again.

Thank God, Serena was there to hold her back.

A waiter served them some champagne and Blair grabbed one and downed one in an instant. Chuck just watched her with intense amusement.

Serena turned to her concerned. "You sure that's -"

"I'm fine." Blair interrupted.

Another waiter came, this time not holding any champagne or deserts and small foods, but a huge package, wrapped beautifully in a silver gift wrap and huge golden bow. It was a gift. And he held it out for Serena.

"Oh! For me?" Serena turned to give Blair a look. Blair just smiled in glee. "Thank you."

"Happy birthday, S." Blair smiled, quite happy for her friend.

"Who's it from?" Eric asked.

"I don't know…" Serena happily giving a pointed look to her best friend, clearly showing that she thought the gift was from Blair. "I wonder what it is…Something glamorous from a fave top designer?"

Blair furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head in denial. "Uhm…No, S. That's not from me. Your gift from me is coming tomorrow along with everyone else's. Maybe it's from Dan."

Serena shook her head, no as well. "Dan, already gave me his present and he's planning to give his other present tomorrow."

Chuck interjected. "Brooklyn had enough to get you two presents? Can't say I'm shocked."

Blair turned to glare at him for ruining another _wonderful _moment while Eric laughed with him.

"That's enough, Chuck." Bart's menacing voice rang out and sternly meeting his gaze. And that was enough to silence his son. Blair was quite amazed at his father's power over his son. Chuck never feared or bowed down to anyone. _Except Bart_, she realized now.

Blair turned back her attention to her best friend who was now opening the mysterious gift, curiosity filling her. Actually, everybody's attention was now turned to what could be the contents of the mysterious package. Surprises like this were always welcome, especially if they were good ones like…

_Okay…not like this…_

Blair stared frozen-shocked and wide-eyed at the contents of the package. _Whoa…_

"Porn and handcuffs?" Serena's voice raised in anger. She turned to Chuck furiously. "Really?" Showing all the stuff to him and then slamming them back into the box.

_What the fu - _

"Wow…" Blair was downright speechless.

"Oh my." Well Lily eyes were definitely popping out by now.

Serena stood up and threw the package and its contents in his face. "This is low, Chuck! Even for you."

"What?"

No freaking way did he send that package, people! When would he have the time to do so anyway?!

But Serena stormed out angrily before Chuck could say anything else in defense to himself.

"I didn't send this!" He exclaimed as rid himself of the package by throwing it out of his hands and on to the table. He now turned to Blair since Serena left. Surely, she'd believe him.

But all she had plastered on her face was a look of disgust at his 'supposed' actions. She glared and shook her head in absolute disapproval.

_Shit! What?! _

This time it was Blair who raged at him. "I thought you changed, Chuck. We talked about this right? I thought we were _okay _now, remember?" She stood up and grabbed the disgusting contents. "I can't believe I was _so _wrong…_AGAIN!_" She yelled to his face. And he just stared wide-eyed at her now. _WTF?!_ "I'm throwing this out, this is trash. And Chuck…just _stop_ it okay?"

And then she stormed out, following the footsteps of her best friend.

Everybody else was dumbfounded.

Seriously, he didn't send it!

_God. _

He took an angry bite at his desert, completely pissed now. Great. Now he was back at being non-speaking terms with Blair…_AGAIN. _Just _exactly _how she termed it. That coming along with a side dish of humiliation in front of his new family.

No! He didn't send that stupid package! Why couldn't anybody get that?

Right because he was the King of All Porn and Sabotage. _Great. _

_Whatever. _

He really didn't give a rat's ass anymore what they thought of him.

And no, he wasn't planning on apologizing this time to Blair.

Because this time, it really was _not _his fault!

_Damn it._

"I wasn't able to tell her my announcement." Lily's voice rang out in a regretful tone.

Chuck just rolled his eyes.

Like hell he cared.

Well the butterflies were still fluttering furiously in his stomach, so guess that meant he still cared.

* * *

"S!" Blair yelled as she ran after her best friend. "Stop!"

Tonight really was full of drama and despair.

Well at least she wasn't the only one who was going to be experiencing a tragedy birthday, Blair thought as she remembered her own birthday filled again with drama and despair. One thing different was the man that caused Serena ruin now was the same man who salvaged her ruined birthday and made her happy for the rest of the night. That led to her downfall of course but not exactly the point right now.

Serena rounded on the brunette chasing after her. "What do you see in him?!"

Blair immediately froze.

"He's an ass! I can't believe you ever held feelings for him! He ruined you! He's screwing me over! I hate him for trying to screw us up _every single time_!" Serena was now really yelling. They were back on the streets now as Serena decided to completely walk out of her new household and go all the way down to the ground floor.

Take note, they came from the penthouse, top floor of the thirty plus, plus, plus floors of the New York Plaza.

"I trusted him. But I was wrong!" Blair replied with not much strength of voice level as her best friend's. "I was so wrong…"

She bent her head down in shame, thinking about the kiss that had only taken place early this morning. It was a happy moment, a beautiful moment, Blair finally admitted that fact to herself. But Chuck always found a way to ruin moments like that and that was why she never allowed herself to actually like it and admit it to herself.

Like now…Yup. That porno package was definitely all Chuck's doing. It had him written all over it. And she was so, _so_ _stupid _for ever believing in him again.

"He kissed me."

_What?_

"What?" Serena's own anger completely washed away with a new anger at the latest revelation.

"He _kissed _me." Blair emphasized so that Serena would get it.

Before she could say anything else…

"We made up last night. He apologized and so did I. We were _okay. _And then we spent the night together, on the hood of his limo, just watching the stars and the city. We didn't do anything. We just spent time together in peace…"

Blair's eyes held that faraway look again as she remembered the night before and all the kinds of feelings that conjured up inside of her as she laid beside the man who was supposed to be the greatest ass to her. It was the best night of her life ever. And the best morning to be followed after that.

"We slept there too. And woke to watch the sunset. It was so romantic, S. If it were you and Dan, you'd be feeling the same way too. And then, I don't know I wasn't thinking right and then _he _kissed me and I let him…"

"Did…" Serena carefully asked.

"No! No. Nothing happened. I stopped. And he actually agreed with it! It was so unlike him! He was so nice about it. Even I couldn't believe it. He drove me home and that was that." Blair returned back to reality. "But now…_this…_

"I thought he could _change_…"

Serena moved to hug her dearest friend. Outside, she was always bitching about town but really, she was only protecting herself from being hurt and being vulnerable. People like Chuck gave her every reason to hold up her high defenses and cut out people.

Oh yeah. Serena really hated people like _Chuck. _

"People like Chuck can't change, B. I'm so sorry." She hugged her friend even tighter, hoping she wouldn't have another relapse soon. God, she hated Chuck for always hurting Blair. She was slowly dying, Serena could see. Blair was really struggling so hard. And Serena didn't know if she would be strong enough to pick up the pieces for Blair.

_Serena hated Chuck. _

No amount of hatred for another person could ever be compared to her hatred for Chuck. If Blair had another relapse because of this, Serena was definitely going to get back to Chuck, starting off by kicking his ass.

"Come on, B." Serena pulled away. "Let's have our own treat. Let's go out, have the night to ourselves! Because I am not going to let anyone else ruin this birthday for me and you're going to have a proper dinner."

Blair smiled gratefully at the idea. She needed a break. They both did.

Well what the heck, why not? She wanted to escape, go wild and crazy and who better to do it with than her own best friend?

"Let's go then."

And with that, the girls ran away from Serena's hell house, taking the night for themselves, not caring about anybody else except themselves.

Oh yeah, they'd definitely make it on the cover of Gossip Girl by daybreak.

* * *

They'd returned to Serena's new abode by early morning, around 1 am. They had the time of their lives. The night was theirs; dinner at Butter, drinking – well that was more on Serena -, talking and laughing about the silliest things, pigging out with cakes and ice creams, dancing in the hottest clubs of Manhattan and just having a complete girl's night out. It was just like old times really. Before the drama, before Serena left. This was how it used to be. Fun and simple.

It really had been a form of release on both their parts and they were just upset that they had to call it a night and head back home.

Serena was drunk, of course.

After much convincing, Blair had managed to get Serena to drink something. It was her birthday after all. But Serena sort of overdid it or Blair just didn't drink much due to her condition and so here she was, Blair Waldorf, slowly dragging a passed out cold Serena up the flight of stairs and painfully baby-sit her. Blair didn't mind though, not really. After all Serena had done for her earlier this evening, this was the least she could do.

As soon as she tucked Serena in her bed, Blair finally made time for herself, taking a quick shower and freshening herself up for bed as well.

But as soon as Blair, slipped on her night dress, she didn't really feel sleepy at all. She was quite restless at this time and wanted to devote a few more activities to herself. It would definitely make her sleep sooner or later anyway.

She was about to make her way down the stairs of her best friend's new home, until she heard the whispers.

She stopped.

And her feet slowly found a mind of its own, making her travel to where the whispers were coming from.

Curiosity always got the best of Blair Waldorf anytime, anyway. And since she was restless, she might well go for the eavesdropping thing right about now.

Her feet made her stop in front of a door that was slightly open ajar, someone apparently did not bother closing it and from the male voices she heard, she could only assume that this door belonged to none other than Chuck's.

Her curiosity grew even more and then, she made herself peek through the door.

"…almost ruined things for me and Lily once before." It was Bart, Blair realized. "I'm not going to let that happen again."

There was beat and Blair could see Chuck's dumbstruck face. "What are you talking about?" He said. He almost sounded like a little boy again. Blair's heart almost went out to him. _Almost._

"I'm talking about that little vulgar stunt you pulled at dinner."

_Oh shit._

Chuck took a deep breath, trying to control his anger. He couldn't do an _'I don't want you anymore' _speech like he had to her at the bar, this was his father he was talking to.

"I didn't send Serena that package." His voice was slowly rising now. The whole breathing thing wasn't really working. "And quite frankly, her violated Virgin Mary act is getting pretty old."

Okay. Well maybe he could still do that _'I don't want you anymore'_ speech with the tone he was going at.

Bart gave it a moment as he sighed. Blair could tell that he was about to blow something in Chuck's face and he was seriously conflicted whether to do it or not. He avoided Chuck's eyes as he said…

"I thought making you my best man would help."

Suddenly Blair wished she hadn't eavesdropped. It felt as if Chuck had been invisibly slapped. And the air was just full of tension. If either of them realized she was listening to their _private _conversation, they'd have her thrown out to the sharks. But here she was now and she couldn't seem to move her suddenly frozen feet.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Oh God…_Walk away Waldorf, just walk away!!_

She stayed put. She really couldn't move anymore.

_Chuck…Oh my God…_

"Inspire you to value _my_ own happiness above _your_ own childish agenda." It seriously felt as if someone was lashing out knives at her instead of Chuck. God, that _hurt._

Chuck remained silent, finally looking down, trying to hide the hurt and anger that flashed his eyes. Blair gulped in pain for him. She knew exactly what position he was being put in right now. She'd been in there countless of times with her own mother.

And that's when she realized that maybe Chuck didn't send that package to her best friend, albeit it had his trademark written all over it.

And then Bart carried on with more knives…

"Things seem to be working out for you in your club, Victrola…"

_Oh no…_

Victrola meant almost everything to Chuck, Blair knew. It had been going great for the past month, after their harsh encounter, so she'd heard so far. _Oh no…_ Now was really the perfect time to just _walk away. _Really. That wasn't so hard to do, right?

Chuck's eyes slowly moved back to his father's profile, hanging on to every word the man drawled.

"…would like me to invest more in the place, so you could have more _control_…" His father pointedly looked at his son. She knew where this was going and all Blair could feel was cold from where she stood. No wonder she couldn't move from her spot.

Oh God, the man just would not stop!

"…in exchange for good behavior, of course."

Another long pause and Blair almost wanted to scream out from where she stood.

_Oh my God._

"You're bribing me?" Chuck finally uttered. _Disbelief, anger and hurt_ etched his entire profile. She had never seen him like this before…Okay fine, maybe last night but this was _completely different. _So, _so _different from last night.

Bart remained emotionless as he said, "So we have a deal then." It was not a question.

And that was when Blair finally ran from her spot and down the stairs. Even as she sped away, she could still hear the painful silence that would surely ensue between father and son from above.

Her eyes filled with tears for Chuck. She understood. She did, she really did. And she felt so guilty for yelling all the stuff at him earlier.

God, she was such a stupid bitch.

She had out for the kitchen and tried to find away to erase what she had heard earlier. Her gaze flickered at something and breathed a sigh of relief.

She needed a drink.

And she didn't care if it was going to be bad for her health.

She'll just cook something or whatever. It would be a nice, _efficient_ way to forget what had just transpired in the room upstairs.

_You should've just walked away Waldorf. _

Ugh.

* * *

He could hear the sound of an angelic voice singing and could smell the aroma of delectable macaroni and cheese coming from the kitchens as soon as he made his down the stairs.

Chuck began to make his way there, wondering who in the world besides him would still be up at a time like this. He was absolutely sure it was none of his new family members. He didn't even want to bother thinking about them now.

So imagine his surprise when walked into his kitchens to find Blair Waldorf, twirling and spinning happily in song as she mixed and spun ingredients and everything else he would never understand in the art of cooking. It looked like as if she did this everyday, here in his territory.

He stood dumbfounded and rooted to the spot as he watched Blair, in nothing but a nightdress that hugged her figure, cook macaroni and cheese and sing beautifully some slow song he'd never heard before.

"…_There's something about the way you take my hand…__  
It's like I never touched…a man…"_

Whoa. That was a high note she held perfectly.

_She sings and cooks? _

Wait. This was so bizarre. Was he dreaming? No…He was certain he was still reeling from the pain his father inflicted on him just moments ago. So…this wasn't a dream. But it seemed so surreal. Because this was Blair Waldorf, dethroned Queen Bitch of all, singing and cooking in _his _kitchen.

Not that he didn't find it adorable and sexy.

Whoa, did the butterflies have a great reaction on him, seeing Blair's different side that was so…_different. _This was just _beyond _his wildest imaginations.

"_It's a beautiful thing, you make me laugh out loud…  
__And when you hold me, I feel more and more a… _OH MY GOD!"

Blair finally whirled around and saw the last person she wanted to see right now. How long had he been standing there?! _Damn it! _Her cheeks immediately reddened at the sight of him and at the thought of him witnessing her in her most unlikely moods. Her doe-eyes were nearly about to pop out at the sight of him and she really looked like a tomato right about now.

_Perfect. _

He just smirked at her. She really wanted to shove the heating pan in his face. The _nerve!_

"Please don't stop on my account." He simply said, infuriating her even more.

"What the hell are you doing here, Bass?" She turned away from him as she continued her cooking, her little happy moment officially ruined thanks to him, King of Ruining All Things There Was.

"Actually, this is my house and my kitchens so I guess I have every right to be here and should be asking you that same question." He didn't even know when she got back in from her walk out earlier but he wasn't about to question her that. The smirk was still on as he slowly neared her. Ugh! Blair thought, frustrated. He was such an ass!

"I couldn't sleep." Blair nevertheless muttered, annoyed.

That stopped Chuck from advancing towards her and got him thinking. Surely, she and her bitch of a best friend had spent the night out and probably got in about an hour ago. He calculated the time she'd nurse a supposed drunk Serena and the time it would take her to freshen herself and since she couldn't sleep, she'd have to make her way down the stairs, meanwhile passing his room and…

_Great. _She overheard them.

"Done!" Blair exclaimed quite happily in his opinion. Yup. She definitely heard them. Chuck, despite his ill thoughts, smiled to himself as he watched her carefully pour her macaroni's in a bowl. How'd she find that anyway? He wondered briefly. She looked so cute, so unlike her usual Blair-self, so very... _alluring _with her new mysterious habit he had no idea she had. 12 years of friendship and he did not know about this? Wow. He must have been really out of his head all these years.

She tiptoed to opened a cabinet above her, carefully getting _two _plates, _two _forks and one more champagne glass, since she already had one for herself. And as Chuck watched her fix the 'table setting', he realized that the other plate was for _him. _

No way. He was really dreaming. Who was this girl and where was the Blair Waldorf he knew?

Blair Waldorf was never this thoughtful. Maybe only to Serena but he was far from the blonde princess and they both knew that.

But there it was, the macaroni, the plates, forks and champagne glasses, ready and waiting. For the _both _of them. He gulped, trying to fight back what felt like tears about to come out, for never had anyone bothered to show him this kind of thoughtfulness all his life.

Who'd have thought Chuck would break at the smallest things possible?

And Blair Waldorf was the last person he'd expected to pull off this endearing thoughtful act, given the record of all the bitch-y stuff she pulled on him and vice versa. So_…whoa._

She sat on a wooden stool and genuinely smiled at him brightly, silently offering him to come sit next to her and have a midnight snack with her.

Chuck momentarily looked away from her beautiful face and gently said, "You heard us, didn't you?"

The smile was immediately wiped out from her face. How did he - ? Oh, what the heck.

"I didn't mean to." There was a long pause. "I'm so – "

He held up a hand, silencing her.

"It's fine."

_No. It wasn't. _

Blair pushed on. "I'm really sorry for all the stuff I said earlier, then." Another pause. "I believe that you didn't send that package to Serena. I'm sorry it took me awhile to realize that."

Chuck just nodded silently, taking in her words from where he stood.

Blair turned to gaze at her baked macaroni, suddenly not feeling all that hungry anymore. Suddenly, she felt him quietly sit beside her and all the tingles in her spine just started rushing out.

"This had better not be poison." He commented. Blair rolled her eyes.

"Please. Far from it."

But she still looked on anxiously as he took a bite. After all, he was the first one other than Dorotha, her parents and herself to ever taste her cooking.

"I have to say. This is…_exquisite_, Waldorf. Never thought you had it in you." And then he continued putting in more macaroni into his plate and munching onto them like a hungry little boy.

She breathed relief that he liked her cooking and smiled as she quietly repeated his actions.

"You sing too?" Chuck asked intrigued. "You have an amazing voice."

"Chuck Bass, is that a compliment? My, oh my am I surprised." And then the real Blair he knew came right back. He smirked in response. There was a slight moment of silence.

"No."

"No what?"

"I can't sing."

"I heard you." He rolled his eyes. "Why didn't you tell anybody before?"

"Coz I'm not that good and I didn't want to humiliate myself during dinner parties when people would be requesting me to sing…" She responded as if that was the most obvious answer in the world. "Besides it's like my own little private thing, like my own secret little world, you know? Please don't tell anyone okay? It could be our own little secret. Please?"

He simply nodded. He understood. Who better? They were alike in so many ways.

_But…_

"The world deserves to hear you, Blair."

She gazed into his eyes then, trying to figure out what game he was playing now. But he wasn't. And he was just being downright honest, vulnerable with her like he was with his father earlier, like he was last night, like he was on her birthday. He really did see through her. Why did she not see those deep brown orbs before? She was really an idiot, to think that he was not worth the time of the day. Nate would have never encouraged her like this.

Nate had never made her feel this way. Confident and happy with herself. Although Chuck had the ability to make her feel the opposite way as much so as Nate could, he still made her feel other things too.

"Thank you."

They silently ate their baked macaroni, both feeling quite happy, forgetting about all the bad stuff that had happened to them separately this evening.

"I could get used to this." Chuck suddenly spoke up. Blair turned to him, wondering what he would say next.

"If you were _my_ wife, I'd have nothing to complain about ever again."

_Wow…_

Blair was knocked out by then..._speechless...breathless…_ To hear such a declaration from him so unlike him…it was…it was… _Oh God…_She had no idea how to describe it…

It was so out of the blue, leaving her completely shocked and completely speechless against his words. And now, he was gazing deep into her. Oh wow… She felt like melting…

Her heart was racing…her legs were trembling…Oh my God! What was Chuck Bass doing to her?! He wasn't even seducing her at the moment!

He was just being downright honest and…dare she say it… _sweet…_

She cleared her throat, not wanting her voice to hitch at a moment like this. Oh God, she could feel her cheeks reddening again and Chuck Bass kept staring at her and she had no idea what he was thinking.

Finally, "Well you never know right? The future's a blur…"

She lowered her eyes and bit her lip in heated embarrassment.

"Blair?"

She looked up, quite afraid of her own feelings now. "Yeah?"

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

He lifted a finger to her, pointing to her face. "_That." _

"Oh."

But she did it again anyway, lowered her eyes and bit her lips. She didn't even notice that Chuck had moved even closer to her.

"Blair?"

She looked up again. _Oh my God. _He was so close to her…

She gulped, feeling her heart hammering in her chest. She was afraid he'd hear it.

"Yeah?" She drawled out shakily.

And then before she even knew it, he grabbed hold of her and _kissed her _passionately_._

Was it possible to feel heaven on earth? Coz if this is what death felt like, well she'd definitely want to have a go at that!

Suddenly, she was on his lap, kissing him back with the same fervor he was. She just felt so alive right now, as he held her so tight and as he kissed roughly but still being quite as gentle as he could be. It was only Chuck Bass who could pull that kind of magic especially when he was kissing her, being rough and gentle at the same time.

She felt his hardness against her and by gods did she just want to continue this passionate forever and ever.

_But..._

_"Stop." _Unfortunately, she couldn't let it get any further. Not here, not now. If she was feeling anything special for this guy, she wanted her next time with him to be special as well.

She tried to pull away but Chuck muttered a soft _'no' _and continued to kiss her, hungry but teasing, soft but wanting more. She kissed him back too but...

She giggled against his lean form. "Stop, stop." She finally managed to pull away from his wanting lips but he still held her tightly on his lap.

"Why?"

Blair smiled and gave him a sweet kiss on the lips. "Because I have to go..." She made a move to get out of his arms, but he wouldn't allow it.

"Not here, Chuck. Not now."

"My bedroom's just upstairs..." He drawled before he kissed her again.

She just laughed and punched him lightly on his arm. "No, no!" He pulled away from her again and gazed into her eyes, wondering why she was stopping. "I want to be sure with you this time around. I need to trust you again. I can't give anything to you if I don't completely trust you_...please_..."

She finally managed to get out of his arms and off his lap.

Blair gave him another sweet kiss, making him growl in frustration because she was so irresistible and he just wanted _more. _

"Goodnight, Chuck."

She gave him another short kiss and finally made her exit out of his kitchens.

Seriously, he could definitely get used to this.

* * *

_To be continued..._

I'm sorry. I couldn't resist! There were no Chuck - Blair scenes in the new episode so that's frustrating. So I wanted to input some stuff in. HAHA. Hope you guys like it.

No I don't own Gossip Girl. If I did, Chuck and Blair would have more scenes together, Jenny would die and Blair would bitch slap Georgina's face out of town (coz G seems like the kind of bitch who's bound to screw everything up again).

Reviews are welcome. I missed you all! Can't wait till next episode! Hopefully they finally throw in a Chuck and Blair scene and make them get together at last.

Coz you have to admit, they're just perfect for each other. :)


	7. Chapter 7: Happy Birthday, S

**A/N: **People! Here it is at last! The next chapter. I know I did promise that I would update soon…it's just a lot's been happening in my life lately (good and bad). Plus I haven't had much inspiration lately on what to write next. I mean of course I'd want to write something I wouldn't regret right? So inspiration is definitely a MUST.

And so inspiration has befallen yours truly. Yes, even I am stuck and confined here in the hospital (thank GOODNESS for technology in hospitals!! There's internet connection in here). Confined for the reasons that is closely related to Blair's. Oh no, I'm not dying no worries people. Haha. Just a bad case with the tummy-wummy…that just became really, _really_ bad...RAWR.

ANYWAY, so NOT the point. Point is inspiration has finally fallen on my head. I'm so bored out of my wits, here I am writing. Stories from _gleechild _and _TheMusicLives _and _Brookebynature_ have been keeping me company in my state of…boring recovery as I try to find inspiration for my own story.

NEW EPISODE: _Georgina _WTF! Leave Serena alone! Evil Dawn Summers mucho? Oh God, I'm so scared for Serena! G's totally gonna screw everything up, I can feel it. I can't wait till the next episode. AAHH. Wonder what they did? My gut says they shot someone. But then again, would the writers ever put something as violent as that? RAWR. So un-Upper East Side-ish. So yeah, guess it might not happen. BUT WHATEVER. Hahaa.

**EDITED. **Yep. From Chapter 1 till Chapter 6, it's all been proofread, edited and completely refurnished hahaha. FINALLY! Right? So to those who want to read it again (which I doubt because nobody really does that), then there you go. It's all fixed. All the annoying errors have been delicately removed. Thank God. Even I was annoyed. Stupid typewriter thingy. Stupid me for not reviewing it. Lesson learned. Haha.

Okay enough chatter. Here's Chapter 7. Enjoy. 

* * *

She was gone by morning.

And he just couldn't help but feel disappointed at her early departure. He sighed at the sudden feeling of emptiness that filled him at the thought her gone from his new abode. He already missed her presence. He kind of liked having her around here…_with family. _

The thought startled him as he walked into his bathroom to get ready for school.

Chuck Bass feeling something for this family? Nonsense. No way in hell. Not an f-ing chance.

But last night with Blair made it all different for him. _Again. _As per usual.

If having nights like last night was what a family was all about, then he wanted in. Well... truthfully, he wanted Blair and he wanted her in the family and he wanted to have a family with her someday, maybe but… let's take it one at a time okay?

He knew she wanted to take – _whatever they were now – _real slow. And he had no problem with that. _Trust. _She had said. And he was more than happy to oblige to her wishes. He secretly wanted the same thing too. He wanted it to be different this time around as well.

He just wished she didn't _want _to take it slow in the _middle_ of a _heated_ and _passionate _kiss. Did Audrey ever do that? Because he was pretty damn sure she didn't, even if he wasn't fond of the old classical movies Blair so adorned.

Nevertheless…

_God. _Why did she leave so early?! Right. Because there was school and stuff…But he really, _really, **really**_ missed kissing her – even if it just had been practically 5 hours ago – it still wasn't enough. He loved kissing her. It felt so good…_so_…

_She was so amazing…_

_Damn it! _

See? Chuck threw his toothbrush aside in exasperated frustration. And now he was being reduced to some mere dorky schoolboy with a crush! Even he couldn't believe it! What the hell was that girl doing to him?! He really wanted to scream in agony right about now. Damn it and damn her and damn _all her kisses! _

_Stupid. _He thought as he splashed water to his face. So the girl hands him some macaroni and cheese, kisses him then stops in the middle of it, leaves early morning and that's got his blood boiling and his heart racing? _Un-fucking-believable._

So is this what it feels to be _in love_?

_DAMN IT! _

The shaver was a _goner. _His mirror was next in line to that.

No. What, what _love_? There is no such thing as _love. _Blair and Chuck? Chuck and Blair? Impossible! Nonsensical! Bah-humbug. Love? Seriously, all this talk about Blair and butterflies and family was just making him think…What a joke. _Love?_ No way. No way. No – but didn't he want her before? Since forever? Didn't he want to experience the whole love thing the first time around? It felt nice, really _nice_ until he screwed it up and Blair waged war against him...but before all that it was _more _than nice…so what was the problem now?

Oh right. He didn't want to get hurt and fall on his butt _twice in a row, _with the _same _girl.

_Great. _Now that's settled, it is now safe to conclude that Chuck Bass isn't in love. With Blair Waldorf, no less.

And with a newfound smile on his face, Chuck shredded his clothes and finally took his morning shower. He was happy to realize that no love could ever be sprouted from the Chuck – Blair saga.

_Yeah. Whatever Chuck. Just keep telling yourself that._

* * *

"Great. You're still here."

Chuck looked up from his side of the table to the obviously hung-over blonde that was his step-sister. He smirked as he looked onto her disheveled appearance.

"I see you're donning the latest fashion, dear sis. Truly a trademark that befits you." He laughed and shared an evil look with Eric. Serena just gave him her usual death glares as an answer. Chuck just smirked back. "And happy birthday to you too, sis."

"Yeah. Happy birthday Serena." Eric greeted genuinely as he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Despite herself, Serena smiled at the greetings. But someone was missing from the round table. "Thanks. But where's Blair?" Serena asked, missing her friend already. They'd had so much fun last night.

The mere mention of the girl he'd been kissing just five hours ago got Chuck going, that was for sure.

"Didn't know she left you early morn? Guess she got bored with the blonde princess and went somewhere else to play…" Chuck commented snidely, although he knew she'd never do that. She loved Serena too much.

Where was that girl anyway?

"Shut up Chuck." Serena spat, clearly not in the mood. "I'll call her later."

And then something from the corner of her cerulean eyes caught her attention. She was midway into biting in on her bacon when she dropped that and suddenly stood up, startling both Chuck and Eric. They curiously watched their blonde sister quickly moved to the drawer just a little behind Chuck and retrieved…a _very colorful, very nicely wrapped package..._

"Another package?" Eric asked cautiously. He didn't really want another repeat of last night. Who kept sending her these psycho packages anyway?

Chuck immediately rushed in to defend himself just in case he'd lose the chance to do so again as she sat back down on her own chair in between him and Eric. "Look I didn't send you that okay? And I didn't send the package yesterday either." Where were all these annoying prank packages coming from?

Serena just rolled her eyes and gave him a look that said, _'Whatever. I don't give a shit.' _God was she hung over. She snatched the paper on top of the package and shoved it to his face.

"Yeah. That's why it says, '_This is not from your psycho stalker, okay?'" _She read it to him as if he was a mere five year old in dire need of comprehension.

"Great. At least that's settled then." What a bitch. She should just be thankful that it was her birthday.

"Who's it from though?" Eric interjected before another fight would ensue between his older siblings.

Serena just widened her eyes in mock enthusiasm.

And then she opened the package and…

_Oh my God…_

Chuck took in her expression and peered in to look at what gotten her blue eyes so shocked. Another porno video perhaps? _Great. _He didn't need to pry in further as she brought out what lay beneath the beautiful package…

_A something…scrapbook? Or something…_

"It's from Blair."

Chuck's eyebrows raised at that. That wasn't a usual Blair Waldorf gift. Normally something from a high fashioned store or boutique would be her gifts. Blair Waldorf settled for nothing but perfect and elite. So giving out mere scrapbooks especially to her dear beloved best friend was kind of like jaw-dropper.

And he'd been jaw-dropped indeed when Serena flipped the cover of the scrapbook to show them Blair's angelic face smiling at them in the little picture hole in the middle of the cover. God, she looked beautiful there, Chuck thought momentarily distracted. "See? It's called _The Blair Bitch Project.'" _

Chuck smirked at that. Okay, maybe it was something Blair might give out.

Serena opened the book to reveal the first page. A letter presented itself before her eyes with a _'READ THIS FIRST' _on it's envelope. She eagerly ripped the envelope open, wanting to immediately read the details of her best friend's letter.

"'_Dear Serena',_" Serena began to read out loud so that her audience could also hear what Blair might have written for her. She knew nothing dangerous would come out of this letter or else Blair would indicate so somewhere.

"'_First of all, happy birthday, S! God, you're so old. You're the first to wrinkles between the two of us really." _

Chuck smirked at that. Serena glared at him angrily before she continued to read the letter.

"'_I love you S. And I wish you all the best. You deserve it. I, more than anyone else, know how much you've been working hard to change for the better. I'm so proud of you, S. You've finally pulled through all the rough times and I'm just so happy for you.  
__Next, I'd like to thank you for everything you've ever done to me. You're my best friend and my sister, you're the only one I can truly trust and depend on. You have saved my life countless and countless of times and without you by side, I'd have been long gone from this world. Thank you Serena for always being there for me in my times of desperate need.  
__As you know, this has been one of the worst years of my life. From a parental divorce to a terrible breakup to a sex scandal. Fighting for my life, rebuilding it and just learning how to live freely again, I couldn't have done it without you. It's still a struggle, really. It's so hard, S. Living out the fairy tale I've created. But I'm trying and I'm learning. I'm growing up.  
__Even if you just went away, I forgive you because you've done so much more for me to make up for that. I am so grateful to have you by my side. If ever you need anything, I'm just right here for you. I want to give back all you've done for me.  
__You've become far beyond your old bad girl self, it's astonishing! And yes, it's saved my life one to many times. You're amazing Serena and you deserve nothing but the best. You've worked hard for it. Only now do I finally understand the struggle you had to go through. You have become one the greatest people I'll ever know and you continue to inspire people like me to do better and to just take in all of life's shit and kick it all in the ass. My inspiration in living life comes from you.  
__Thank you for being my one true friend. I wish you and Dan all the best. Get married already and get me cute fat nephews and nieces!  
__Enclosed in this box is a scrapbook filled with photos and captions I've saved up since we were children. I'm handing them to you now with the knowledge that you'll handle them with care._

_Once again, happy birthday! And I love you._

_Love,  
__B.'"_

A long moment of silence settled on the table as the trio contemplated the words of girl missing from the table. Serena didn't even realize she was crying until Chuck handed her his handkerchief which she gratefully took.

But instead of wiping her tears, she began wiping her tear drops that stained her new scrapbook. Serena began flipping through the pages and truthful to her words, there were pictures of her even from the moment when she was born! Slowly escalating to pictures of her and Blair when they were four, when they first met, when they had their first sleepover, first party, first makeup and then her, Blair, Nate and Chuck when they were kids, her and her family, her and Dan…There was even a shrine for all of Serena's ex-crushes, pre-Dan. Her whole entire life was contained in this suddenly thick book. And also Blair's life, of course. They've been best friends for so long, they shared alot, each other's lives, almost. There was even a page for all the people Blair hated, photos and all. Jenny was number one on that list. She drew horns and a mustache on Jenny's face and Serena had to laugh at Blair's childlike ways.

And Blair had made a page that struck Serena the most.

_A Blair Page: The Loves of Her Life.  
Secret for Serena._

There were only two photos in this page, aligned neatly next to each other with proper distance. The first picture on the left was of her and Nate back when they were _truly _happy being together last year, around Thanksgiving and the next picture which was to the right was of her and Chuck, a more recent one, probably just before the Debutante Ball, with them looking like the _happiest _couple in the world.

Chuck _did not _fail to notice this one captivating page. And all he could do was drop his fork and stare on. Even _he_ forgot they had taken that picture. He remembered that was after the Debutante dance class and he had come to her house and Nate had dropped by and…_there_. So…he was a _love _in her life? He felt so speechless…

Serena rudely flipped to the book's last page, when she noticed Chuck practically breathing on her as he stared on the page that was supposed to be meant only for her eyes. The last page was simple. It was a photo of the both of them from their own mini-photo shoot around New York after ditching Eleanor's photo shoot. _'FOREVER.' _The captions said.

And now, Serena was really crying because she had never expected to receive such a touching gift from Blair either. Blair was always so…_Blair. _Not kind, sweet, grateful best friend Blair although she had her moments, such as now. There was a reason Serena had never given up on Blair and this was it. Never had she received such a gift like this. It was priceless and worth everything to her and Blair at the same time.

Blair could really be the sweetest girl when she wanted to be and this was just…_humbling, _such a very Dan-ish kind of gift that she was just beyond words for her best friend's surprising and unusual actions.

Serena immediately got up, carefully placed the scrapbook in the living room table and wiped her tears.

"I'm going to look for Blair." She announced. She didn't even have a taste of her breakfast.

And with that she took off without another word, leaving the two men completely dumbfounded to even respond.

Because really, who would have thought Blair would do something like this?

* * *

Unfortunately, Serena did not find Blair at her home or at school. Her hung over was long gone, cured by a dosage of Blair's gift and black coffee, thank God for those. But she now walked to school alone still with no Blair in sight. Where was that girl? She decided to just call her up.

"Hey. Why aren't you at school?"

"Well happy birthday to you." Blair responded quite chirpily, obviously in a good mood. "Did you like my gift?" On the other side of the line, Blair Waldorf genuinely smiled in the reaction she knew she'd get from her blond best friend.

"Oh Blair I love it so much! Thank you! Thank you! I've never been more touched, Blair, really. Thank you. I promise to take care of it and cherish it and keep it forever and ever and ever."

Blair giggled on the other line. "You'd better." She immediately got serious. "That was a once in a lifetime chance. You'll never get another gift like that again from me."

"I won't? Aah, who knows B? I might be surprised again." Serena laughed back when Blair replied a bitchy _'Don't count on it'_. At least the Blair she knew was still there. And she loved all of her all the same. "Hey, school? Remember?"

"I'm taking the morning off." Blair now said glancing at all the painting around the gallery, the old smirk gracing her lips. "Volunteering to help those less _fortunate _than myself."

"Wow. You're _really _in a good mood." Serena was astounded as she walked to school listening to her best friend.

"Oh and why not? It is your birthday." Blair immediately changed the subject. "Hey, Dan's not hanging in Brooklyn again this morning. He's with you at school, right?" Well she couldn't afford to have Dan ruin her plans all up.

Serena's eyes furrowed at the question. It was hardly for Blair to be so concerned about her and Dan, let alone Dan's welfares. "Uhm…no. Not yet but he'll be here soon. Why?"

"Nothing." Blair turned slightly as she heard the people moving in with more paintings. This was her cue. This was really such a good day. Being nice was so much fun! Serena was so right. "Just tell him I say hi!"

"Okay." And they hung up. Wow. First, a touching gift, then volunteering to help out, and then being concerned for Dan. Where was her best friend? And what had that new girl done to Blair Waldorf? Oh, 'tis a happy day for Serena today.

Serena couldn't help but smile at Blair's un-_Blair-like _actions.

Suddenly, a delivery man from out of nowhere approached her, with 3 huge boxes now parked in front of her.

"I've got three cases of champagne for Serena Vander Woodsen." The delivery man read from his file.

_What? _

"Oh." Serena glanced at the file, and there it was, her name scrawled on it. There has to be a mistake. "No. No. I'm Serena Vander Woodsen but those aren't mine." She pointed, indicating to the champagne-filled boxes. No way she'd do that. She'd get into so much trouble!

The delivery man protested immediately and pointed to his file. "Well, the purchase order never lies. Salut!" And now, everybody was standing around her and looking at her purchase. Champagne in school? Hell yeah!

Is the bad girl slowly returning? _About time. _It was her birthday today anyway. The perfect time to have all the fun. They all thought. Well, if she was. What a treat for the rest of them!

Serena's previously good mood shifted to that of humiliation and anger. Who the hell could've done this?!

'Tis so not a good day anymore!

And as she finally spotted the one person she clearly detested among all, Blair's love or not.

He had a notepad in his hands and he was clearly in the middle of writing something. _Tsk. _As if. Serena was so not buying the innocent act he was giving her now. First, porn in front of her family, now alcohol on school grounds?

Serena glared at him, hatred and fire in her blue eyes and he looked back at her, eyes furrowed, confused.

_What? No. I didn't send that!_

But he remained silent as she stormed away from him in anger.

Why would he even do that?

He didn't even have the time because most of the day he was so busy thinking about Blair, Blair, Blair and nothing but _Blair!_ He wouldn't do this! Especially now that they were more than okay, when they were on kissing grounds. Now, that was all going to be screwed up because some prankster was f-ing with him and Serena just had to take him for the blame because really, who else right?

Didn't anybody else see that he was really genuinely looking forward to making this whole family thing work out right?

_Damn it! _

This was bad. He suddenly remembered his father's words last night.

He so did not feel all that good anymore despite last night and this morning's _good_ outcomes.

_At least they're having a great morning. _Chuck thought sarcastically as he watched everyone eagerly pitch in the champagne boxes and made themselves a drink.

_Shit. _He was really screwed.

* * *

_That felt good._

She knew it was wrong. But she had no love for Jenny. And Jenny deserved all that she got. And even though she thought that she probably shouldn't waste what was left in her short life getting revenge on this bitch, well, life just wouldn't be the same if she didn't fight for her own throne right? Whether it was important or not.

Besides, Jenny had done enough to hurt her and Blair was just beginning to get her game on. And it was Jenny herself who had done her own undoing.

Even Blair couldn't believe it. She stole from Hazel herself? A Valentino dress? _A one-of-a-kind? _Seriously, Jenny should have just stopped at it if she couldn't handle it. At least give some dignity to herself by being honest. It wasn't so hard to say, _I can't afford those kind of things coz you know we're not that rich _compared to _I slept with Chuck Bass, oh and after that, I slept with Nate Archibald and pretended I was still a virgin. _Top that, bitch.

But really. She didn't feel sorry for Jenny, no. The girl got what she deserved. Lying thief. If she kept this up, she'd be exactly in the same position Blair was, fallen harder.

Who Blair did feel truly sorry for was Jenny's father. Such a good dad. And she felt bad trying to use him to get her plans accomplished. She had finally convinced him to throw a party for Jenny with her 'new' friends as a sort of _'relief' _or whatnot from all the '_stress' _Jenny has been going through the whole year. And all he wanted to do was give her daughter the best that he could give and she couldn't even be bothered to be grateful for it.

Way to go, bitch.

Really, if Blair had a father like Jenny's, she'd gladly give up her throne and gladly switch places with Jenny. Having a father like that, who wanted to just give her all he could despite their financial shortage, who was not gay and would never leave her daughter behind for her lover, Jenny was considered lucky compared to Blair.

How the bitch turned out the way she did on such loving grounds was _beyond _Blair.

Casting her thoughts aside, despite her guilt feelings regarding Jenny's dad for having involving him on their war, everything had gone through successfully. Her clique had now joined her at her table in Butter, reserved especially for them.

Oh she didn't need them. Not really. She was completely content with Serena's genuine friendship. But of course, what way to get back on top than getting it back on with _her _original clique that _Jenny _stole from her, just like that Valentino dress.

_Victory is sweet. _

_Just like her._

Could kissing Chuck Bass again brought her the confidence she needed to execute all these plans?

She couldn't help but blush at that.

* * *

_Bitch._

How dare she drag along Nate in this war? Nate never even liked the mere act of socializing even if he was forced to! Damn it. _Damn her._

And then all her earlier confidence was gone. Chuck was so far away from her. Her victory was short-lived. She had lost in the end.

Nate sat, his back turned away from her as Penelope completely tried to woo him in her _'clutches'_. All of the girls were all over Nate. As if Nate would ever really be interested in them. But that wasn't the point. Point was, the girls were willing to forgive Jenny.

"Hazel, maybe your mom really did give away that Valentino." Penelope commented. Hazel simply nodded in agreement, not wanting to be embarrassed in front of Nate of all people.

"Yeah. She is always cleaning out her closet and this whole fiasco with the police could really play with her memory."

_Bitch._

She suddenly couldn't move, she was completely frozen on the spot, completely out of words. How was she supposed to top this now? And how was she supposed to face Nate again? Another slap on the face much? Oh she'd definitely lose even more. She wanted to find the nearest bathroom and just throw up. Disappear forever and just_ throw_ _up._

_Bitch. _

And Jenny was clearly giving her a pointed look that said she had won _this _round. God, she really, _really_ hated this girl. Blair was more than infuriated, more than hurt and more than troubled that Jenny had to _steal _it all away from her again.

She was losing it, losing _everything…_

Nate noticed Jenny looking at someone intently and he turned to see who it was.

_Oh dear._

"Blair!" He immediately stood up at the sight of his ex and approached her.

And Blair wanted to just cower away among the crowd that kept bumping into her as Nate approached her.

Jenny suddenly looked alarmed as he saw this exchange. "Nate! You probably shouldn't linger longer with that cheating whore. It could do you real damage." As she and the rest of the girls laughed it all out.

He clearly gave them all a look of disapproval. "I'm sorry, I just needed to get this out." And he continued to approach Blair and that was enough to quiet the girls and alarm Jenny beyond anything.

"Look Blair, I know this isn't the right place to say this but…" He took a deep breath. "_I'm sorry." _

Whoa.

Nate Archibald. Really, you always are impeccable timing, aren't you?

Blair's jaw dropped and so did everyone else's. Blair even forgot that she was currently at war.

"You were right. I have been selfish and I deserve everything you throw at me. Clothes, a few slaps, maybe some shoes to go with all that?" He hinted with the charm she always loved about him and she just wanted to hug him right about now for saving her life for the first time _ever._ "I understand everything now. I just wish you could've told me…"

Blair just nodded, jelly and dumbfounded.

And suddenly, the girls just saw her in a new light.

Jenny was seething, of course.

But they were all waiting to hear what Blair would say to him after just giving her a public apology.

"I'm sorry too." Blair finally said, breathless, completely blown away by his eyes. She did not notice the other girls or Jenny at all.

Nate outstretched his hand. "Friends?"

Blair stared at his perfect hand. No way did she want to take that hand again. She knew that road if she took that hand.

So instead she sheepishly said, "Nate…I'm friends with Chuck too. We made up before you and I, so…"

Nate just nodded in understanding, this was the Nate she knew. The kind, understanding Nate. Why couldn't he bother being that when they were together again?

"Well at least we're being honest now."

Blair just smiled genuinely - _gratefully -_ at him for understanding. Yes, this was closure, albeit the setting was so _wrong, _but it was closure nonetheless and they can both finally move on and be happy with their lives.

"Join us?" Nate offered.

"Yes Blair, please do." Hazel offered as well. Any friend of Nate's was someone of highly importance, especially Blair.

Suddenly, everything was perfect again.

Now it was her turn to give Jenny a pointed look that _she _clearly won _this _round.

_Bitch. _

"Sorry. Best friend's birthday. I really should go over and celebrate with her." And she felt the awed looks the girls gave her as they witnessed first hand how she, Blair Waldorf just turned the love her life down and her clique.

"Tell her I said happy birthday." Nate said as she began to walk away.

"Will do."

And she walked away from that crowd with a huge smile on her face.

She'd won.

_Victory is sweet._

_Just like her._

Oh, she was so happy today.

Happy Birthday, Serena indeed.

* * *

On the other side of town, Chuck Bass wasn't doing so well.

So it was Serena's birthday, they were probably holding another _'family dinner' _and he was back here in his suite.

Bart kicked him out.

Serena had told on him – _that bitch – _that he had been the one in charge of all the alcohol on school grounds.

Really. It did feel so _great_ when absolutely _no one _believed him. Well Blair did. But where was she these days? Okay, As if he hadn't seen her just the night before. But he seriously felt like Cinderella right now. Bullied by the step-sister, kicked out of the house by the father.

He really missed Blair, by the way. He had not seen her all day.

He'd rather deal being _in love _with her than deal with everyone else's harsh, misleading judgments on him.

There was knock and he slowly got up to answer it, curious. After all, who would come to his suite at this time?

A part of him hoped it was Blair.

He opened the door.

_Nope. Guess not. _

"Hey." His bitch of a step-sister stood before him. _What now? _Before he could turn her away the way he did Blair, she said, "I'm really sorry, Chuck. I know now it wasn't you who sent those packages." She handed her an envelope with a letter on attached to it. The letter was short, unlike Blair's from earlier this morning.

He looked at her and he could see she was clearly shaken up.

'_Hope you like the presents, coming back to town. – G' _

As in Georgina 'Bad Ass' Sparks?

The one who brought the bad girl out of Serena? The only one who still could? No wonder Serena was shaken up.

"Why don't I make you a drink?"

Serena just gratefully nodded, still pale and shaken as she entered his suite.

* * *

"Blair, where have you been all day? I haven't seen you and it's my birthday…really, really bad birthday…Happy birthday to me…" Serena drawled on, the liquor brimming on her tongue and drumming in her brain with Chuck immediately looking up from the bar counter as she drawled on Blair's name over and over again and how bad her birthday was today.

So Serena is officially going to be drunk for two nights in a row now.

Yep. Georgina was seriously bad news.

He could practically hear Blair screaming on the phone as Serena drunkenly moved the phone away from her ear.

"Ssh Blair. Don't be so loud, you'll wake-y people."

He smirked at that. Yes, Blair definitely could create a storm when she wanted to. Still, he was starting to dread this. Blair was going to have his head for getting Serena drunk _on her birthday_, no less. Perfect way to start out with the girl of his dreams right? He shouldn't have offered her a drink. He shouldn't have…_Stupid Bass. Stupid!_

And then…

"Come on here, Blair Bear! Let's celebrate! Woo! Chuck's suite. 1812 okay? 1812. 1812. Ooh… numbers are funny…" And then the blonde giggled to oblivion. Chuck Bass shook his head '_no' _at her. Serena just giggled even harder.

"Chuckie doesn't want you to come and play." She pouted. "Bad Chuck! Bad! Meanie, always a meanie to Blair Bear!" She listened onto the phone to hear Blair's voice and smiled.

"She's says she's coming over and she's going to rip your head off." Serena _very _happily announced to him.

_Great._

"Gee. Thanks. Can't wait." Chuck drawled on sarcastically before he downed his own Scotch.

He was going to need it when he died right?

_Why? WHY did he have to offer her a drink?!_

* * *

The knocks on his door were frantic, furious and angry.

_Damn it!_

It had been just ten minutes since the call! God, she was fast.

He shut his eyes and gave himself a long, _long _moment before he finally opened the door.

And there it was.

The wrath that was Blair Waldorf.

"What did you do?!"

_See?_

He automatically let her in, of course though she'd already done that herself by just barging in and seeing her best friend drunk and completely fast asleep on the couch of Chuck Bass' suite.

How the hell did this happen?

One day, one _friggin _day of being back to bitch town and _this _happens?! She rounded on the man behind her.

"It's her birthday today! I can't believe you let her get drunk like this! Damn it! And damn you!"

"All the more for her to get drunk. You said it yourself. It's her_ birthday_." Chuck responded with equal venom as hers.

"Ugh!" Blair was losing it. She really couldn't believe this! How could he? Really. "You don't get it, do you? Serena's been working so hard to change. And you just had to ruin that on the final hours of her birthday! I can't believe you!"

"For your information, she was having a bad birthday and so I had to offer her something. I didn't think she'd drink herself to oblivion!" Chuck spat back at her, anger flaring. Well the hell did he know Georgina would have such an effect on his step-sister? And how dare _she_? Barge in his home and accuse him of things he didn't even do! Why was he even bothering explaining his actions to her anyway?

_Oh right. He was in love with her._

They stood their grounds, both glaring at each other, anger blazing through their eyes, each silently challenging who'd relent first.

After an _extremely _long while, Blair had gave up first and sighed tiredly.

"Let me just call Dan."

Chuck bit his tongue to fight the retort about to bounce out of his mouth. He'd been doing that a lot lately. Thanks to who?

_Oh right again! Blair. Cheers to you, sweetheart._

She finally ended her call with Humphrey boy and turned back to him. "I can't carry her back to my place so she's going to have to stay here." She took a moment to think about her decision more and then amended, "_We're _going to have stay here. Who knows what you'll do with her alone."

Couldn't say he was more shocked than ever.

But he covered it up. "I'd be more than thrilled to have you both." He took in Serena's sleeping figure and turned back his gaze on Blair.

"Serena could take the couch…" He motioned for his bed. "You can stay on my bed."

"I will not!" Blair protested immediately.

Chuck inched forward to the petite brunette he so desired. "Come on, you know you've been craving for it too…"

"You wish…" And then she pushed him away from her. "Thanks Chuck but _no _thanks. I'm fine here sleeping with Serena. Lord knows she needs all the protection she needs on her own birthday more than ever."

Chuck just smirked mockingly at her in response.

"Whatever, Waldorf. But don't come running to me regretting it." Chuck said as he walked away to get them something to change in and some extra covers. He still heard her response though as he walked further away from her.

"Oh I won't Chuck. Lesson learned."_._

He closed his eyes and leaned on the cabinet doors to let him cool down and breathe a sigh of relief because no, he didn't want to fight with her nor remember any bad memories he himself created.

_Shit. _

Wow. And the night was still young.

God, he hated Georgina. _Always have, always will. _

Big _thanks _to her in advance.

* * *

_To be continued..._

I think this probably one of the longest chapters ever. HAHA. So sorry for the great bore. really. But I really wanted to get over the Blair Bitch Project area and move on to new waters... I actually have alot in mind but I needed to finish it off because I wanted Georgina to enter the scene first.

I cant wait to play around with her character. Let's screw everyone up via Georgina Sparks!

Yeah I'm planning to make her kill Blair to cause Serena pain. -- KIDDING! HAHAHHAA. NO WAY. There'd be no point in this story if I finish off Blair next chapter right? Besides what about Chuck? Poor fella. Plus if it were me, Blair and Serena would be the ones kicking Georgina's ass outta town.

Wonder what that girl is going to do next really. Cant wait.

P.S. I am seriously giving up all hopes that Chuck and Blair will ever get together on the show - let alone have an actual scene together face to face, having a nice conversation or bitching about each other.. UGH.

Oh well, who knows? In the meantime, I shall satisfy my Chuck and Blair needs through here. And through reading your stories, so UPDATE them SOON.

Coz you know I love them.

THANKS!

R&R. Thanksie.


	8. Chapter 8: To 1812 and Beyond

**A/N: Once again I am so overwhelmed with all of the reviews, thank you so much for the support! **Oh! And I actually replied to some! :P First time, yes? Haha.

I'm really glad you all liked the previous chapter, I personally think it was a bore coz it's just a repeat of the episode with a few touches in it. But I guess I have to see things in a different way right? Wow. Thank you so much.

To all those who wished me well, thank you too! I'm finally free! Anyway here's the next chapter you've all been anticipating for! Oh yes, totally original, nothing from the show this time around.

**NEW EPISODE: **OMG. My gut was right! They did shoot someone! OH GOD. WOW. HAHA. WOW. I can't believe what I thought was right. I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE KILLED SOMEONE! Blair…HELP! I guess I underestimated the writers much, because if they have no problem writing about sex then they sure as hell have no problem writing about murder. Props to them all. Now make Chuck and Blair HAPPEN!

**No Chuck. No Nate. DAMN IT. **

The episode made me cry with the whole Eric thing. **I STILL HATE JENNY**. I mean how dare she? To Eric, to Rufus, to Blair… That BITCH. I feel sorry for her, at least a teensy bit but she brought it upon herself. Oh and along with her, ASHER CAN FUCKING DIE TOO!! HOW DARE HE? TO ERIC, TO BLAIR, TO DAN. UGH!! AND GEORGINA CAN DIE TOO!! OH FUCK THEM ALL!!

Angry rants shall continue after the whole chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

"Already regretting it? Waldorf, you are fast."

Chuck had just emerged from the bathroom, clad in just a white sleeveless inner shirt and navy blue boxers, ready for bed, when he stopped in the middle of his room as he saw Blair plopped down comfortably on _his _bed dressed in _his _grey t-shirt that he _never _wore and also in boxers. _His boxers, by the way. _

_Where the hell did she get those?_

Chuck stood, torn between wanting to strangle her right then and there and kissing her senseless because God, did she looked so hot in his clothes that were too oversized for her figure. Wait. Why was she wearing them again?

_Oh whatever. _It didn't matter the reason of her sudden desire to have everything that belonged to him surround her. His heart was doubling so much so at the mere thought…God, he was such a schoolboy, staring dumbly at her as sprawled unabashed on his bed. _Damn her. _

She smiled evilly at him and said, "Oh. Change of plans. Serena kept pushing me out the couch, so now I'm pushing _you_ out the bed." She gave him her sweetest smile yet and he wanted to completely wipe it off. She pointed to his little chair at the corner. "You can sleep right over there, I'm sure it'll be comfortable for you. The floor's nice too."

Chuck's jaw dropped to the floor. _WTF? _This was _his _suite! And _she_ was ordering _him _around? _NO FRIGGIN WAY WAS HE SLEEPING ON A CHAIR TONIGHT! _She was even getting too comfortable in his bed, even if she did look absolutely downright hot on it.

_But…_

"Get off my bed right _now."_

Yeah, he loved her. He just loved _sleeping comfortably_ more.

Not that sleeping with Blair Waldorf wasn't comfortable, but she…

Blair's reply was short and concise. _"No."_

"Get off."

Again. "No."

_Damn it. _Suddenly he wasn't thrilled having his stepsister and her around his suite anymore. Too much girls. Wait…when did he have a problem having girls over his suite?

_Oh right. When he fell in love with one of them. _

"Sorry princess, but that's not an option." Chuck said, his voice firm. "It's either you get out or you sleep with _me._" Not that he minded, of course.

But she did.

"I will _not!_"

He chuckled and began to advance towards her. "Too bad then."

Blair's eyes widened in horror as he swiftly began approaching her. "What are you doing? Chuck…" Her voice was full of warning.

Chuck just laughed because really, what could she do?

He suddenly lifted her in his arms – _God, she was really small -, _she felt like a feather in his arms. Blair screamed and trashed in his arms as she was lifted in the air, away from the bed.

"_Let me go!"_

Chuck just continued to laugh, heading to his living room with Blair on his shoulder. "Ssh. Don't be so loud, you'll _wake-y _people." And then he motioned with his head to Serena who began stirring on the couch. She froze in his arms for like a millisecond and then when she saw Serena completely fast asleep again, she began trashing in his arms and hitting him on his back, head, chest _– everywhere - _violently once more.

_Ouch. _

You know, for a small woman, she definitely had some manly strength in there.

She had somehow managed to wrapped her legs tightly around his waist, holding her upright and balancing herself more, and then she kept hitting him with more force that he was loosing his footing and stumbling all over the place – _Damn this woman! –, _until he finally completely lost _all _his footing, tripped and fell backwards on the carpet floor with a huge _thump, _bringing Blair along with him.

Blair finally stopped hitting him as he lay there, pained and her triumphantly victorious on top of him, straddling him.

What a position they were in now, he suddenly realized.

Even if his back was hurting from his clumsy downfall, this situation was a little too hot to pass up and he was getting a bit turned on.

_Just a bit, Bass? _

"Touché, Chuck." Blair proclaimed triumphantly. So she loved being on top of him, huh? _Two can play that game,_ Chuck thought playfully.

With sudden, expert movements that Blair hadn't anticipated, Chuck rolled and wrestled with her on the floor, arms and legs working at the speed of light and suddenly _she _was the one beneath him and _he _was the one pining her down. She didn't even have the time to blink!

And unlike with her awhile ago, his face was merely inches from her now as he stared at her intensely, his body completed locked hers to him allowing her no sense of movement at all, and her arms were raised up locked and pinned by his strong hands.

_Oh shit..._

"No." Chuck shook his head slowly and sunk his head lower to whisper in her ear. "Touché, _Blair._"

_Dear God, what have I gotten myself into?! _

Did his voice have to be so sexy right _now_? Blair was pinned, completely helpless – _and breathless -_ under him, flushed beyond all words, she prayed to all the gods there were, that her best friend would suddenly wake up and push Chuck off at her right about _now _since _she, _herself couldn't_. _

She waited for her prayer to come true.

_Please wake up Serena…please…please…please…_

Seconds passed. It felt like forever to her. _Make my wish come true._

It didn't.

And Serena remained asleep.

_So…_

"Let me go." Blair whimpered helplessly under him. She didn't mean to, Chuck would never completely take her against her will but she had to get him off of her. Being completely under his spellbinding gaze was enough to tempt her to…_go down that road again so, so willingly…_with him…

And no, she didn't want to go down that road again with him…_right?_

Chuck just smirked at her and Blair tried to trash and push him off her but he easily fought her by pushing her down, holding her even tighter against her will.

And suddenly, the smirk changed into that of a smile, _filled with so much tenderness and…_dare she say it? _Love…_perhaps? She didn't know. He'd never shown this much emotion to her before.

Was it her imagination or did his gaze become gentle as he stared into her brown orbs? Was it her imagination or was her heart racing inside her as he continued to hold her down, saying nothing but just tenderly looking upon her?

_Oh my God…what was he doing to her? _

"Chuck…" She finally breathed.

Another long gaze filled with so much emotion she could hardly decipher them anymore.

Another long silence filled in with nothing but the rapid beatings of their hearts.

_Finally, he spoke._

"Kiss me."

_Oh my God…_

And her heart raced even faster at those words. _Kiss him? _She could feel him press his body even more closer to her body and she fought for control, for some sort of stabilization. Somebody - _anybody - _help her!

He waited, still gazing upon her porcelain face. She'd give in, she had to...

And then…

_She kissed him._

But not on his lips, not completely. She had lifted her head slightly, leaned into him and kissed him, on the corner of his waiting lips.

It was _sweet _and unlike her usual kisses with him, but it was enough to make him to painfully close his eyes and wish she'd always kiss him like that, _sweetly…tenderly…reserved only for him. _

And he wanted to give back to her, so he kissed her, fully on the lips but not like how he usually kissed her. His kisses now were slow, soft, _tender…_

_Just like she'd been with him, just like how he'd never been with anyone else…._

And she was kissing him back, finally giving in to this beautiful moment that she always supposed only happened in those romantic movies she always loved.

But this was no movie.

This was _real._

And here, in real life, was a man who was willing to really slow things down and be gentle with her. And he was actually loving it.

And by God, was she was loving it as well…

He finally released her pinned hands to touch her all over, roaming his hands everywhere he could, pulling _her _closer to him as she used her newly freed arms to wrap around his neck, pulling _him_ closer to her.

It felt so good, making out with Chuck Bass on the carpet floor of his suite, just in front of his own bed. Blair wished this could go on forever and ever, she always loved kissing him, nothing else could compare to his kisses, whether rough or soft, not even Nate's…

He was her first. And she would always love her first.

And they could've gone on kissing and making out forever, if they didn't hear Serena groan drunkenly from her spot on the couch and they finally stopped for some air and shared a look.

They started quietly laughing.

Coz really, they didn't want to get it on with Serena completely passed out and drunk on Chuck's couch.

Chuck smiled at her. "Sorry, forgot about her."

Blair just giggled in joy. "You want me to cook for you?"

He kissed her on the cheek. "Please. I do enjoy your cooking as much as I enjoy you."

She kissed him on the cheek as well in response. And they repeated their sweet actions while giggling for awhile longer until Chuck finally released her and got up.

With an outstretched hand, he helped her up on her feet as well and laughed at her disheveled appearance.

"You're a mess."

She hit him lightly on the arm, blushing slightly. "Stop it. This is your fault."

He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulled her to him and whispered in her ear, his velvety voice raw with desire for her.

"I like you like this. Brings out the Bass in you."

She giggled out loud at his choice of words and released herself from his grasp but he pulled her back to him to kiss her again, longer this time. _God, he just couldn't get enough of her._

Well, he did miss her and he hadn't seen her all day so he supposed he deserved this.

"Where's your kitchen?" Blair asked in between kisses.

Chuck didn't care about his kitchen at the moment. "Right over there." Motioning it with his head while kissing her.

Blair giggled more but then finally put a stop to their never-ending make-out sessions by withdrawing from his lips and pushing him at a distance.

"Behave or no food for you."

Chuck shrugged. "So? I could eat _you _instead_." _

Blair blushed before she began to walk towards his mini-kitchen. She didn't want him to see her blushing. It was kind of embarrassing. She started getting out the materials for their midnight cookout and then glanced at her best friend's figure on the couch.

_Poor girl. _She thought how much Serena was missing out on the fun. But then again, _threesome_ was not Blair's thing and she didn't exactly want to share Chuck with anyone.

_Okay fine. Just sleep peacefully, sweet Serena. Happy Birthday. Love you. _

She smiled giddily before she turned to the man leaning on wall just a few feet away from her. He was looking intently at her again. As if she was the most fascinating thing he had ever held eyes upon.

She quickly turned away from him, another blush slowly creeping up her cheeks and trying very hard to get back to the simple task at hand.

"So…uhm…" She stuttered. Blair Waldorf does not stutter! She was so not going all Dan Humphrey on Chuck Bass! Not now, not ever. She took a deep breath and calmly collected herself. _There much better._

"What did you want tonight?"

Chuck smirked. "_You."_

_Shit. _

Blair was literally shaking at his words, or rather, _word_. Seriously, how was she supposed to respond to that? She tried to compose her _again_, damn it, why did she have to keep blushing?!

She breathed a shaky laugh. "Silly. I meant _food_. Can't be me. I'm off limits."

Chuck raised his eyebrows at that, amused at her desperately grasping for control. "Really? Well what about earlier, on the floor?" He slowly began advancing towards her. "I think you were totally limit free back there."

"Yeah but that's the farthest it's ever going to get…" And then she thought about her words. "For now."

Chuck merely shrugged, nonchalant. "I can settle for that."

Blair's eyes widened at the impact of his words. Whoa. Since when does Chuck Bass do considerate? But she didn't want to ask him because this whole thing was slowly driving her insane.

"Choice of food please?"

Chuck made a motion to pretend he was thinking. "Hmm…still _you." _

"_CHUCK!"_

He laughed out loud, she finally lost it. "Anything. Surprise me."

Blair's eyebrow raised, but nevertheless she smiled as she turned away back to her earlier tasks.

Who would've thought the great, notorious player of the Upper East Side would be exceptionally sweet? And charming? Oh and considerate? _'I can settle for that'? _Whoa. Chuck Bass forcing himself to be content with just making out for the time being?

She sighed quite happily though. If Chuck Bass was making her fall in love with him…well…

It was _sort of_ working.

_Just sort of? Yeah right. _

* * *

"Chuck, why are you back here again?"

They now situated themselves on his bed, with Chuck leaning on his bed wall as he sat and Blair lying down on his bed, engulfed in his pillows.

They finished their midnight snack and decided to head onto his bed and just talk. Indeed Blair had surprised him with her midnight treat by creating a dessert delicacy for the both of them. There was no specific name for it as Blair had created it herself, mixing anything edible she could find in his refrigerator and making them actually taste _good _when mixed all together. It was even presented with a cherry on top. He had no idea where she came up with it.

He remembered saying, "_What's this?"_

"_Oh it's my own delicacy."_

_"No name?"_

_She had stared at him with this look. He chuckled._

"_Every new delicacy created should have a name."_

"_Hmm…" And she did think for awhile. "'Blair's Midnight Affair?'"_

_And all Chuck could do was laugh at her choice of food naming. "Sounds more like a cocktail drink than a dessert."_

"_That's why I don't name my own recipes."_

Back to the present, he now stared down at her and pondered on how to answer her question.

He knew he couldn't reveal anything about Georgina to anyone, not even Blair because Serena had named the specifics and she truly was getting freaked out with everyone knowing Georgina was coming back to town, much to his bafflement. Georgina was a bad girl yes, and only she brought out Serena's inner bad girl, but they were still friends at one point in time, sometimes even surpassing that friendship with Serena's and Blair's, much to Blair's frustration. The mere mention of the old bad girl slash somewhat friend would have Blair's blood boiling in anger.

And he kind of didn't want to ruin the moment.

_Shockers, anyone?_

So instead he decided to play dumb. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, why are you back here in your suite again? Didn't you like, just moved out?"

He gazed at his hands, contemplating on what to say next. He decided to just go with bluntness.

"Bart kicked me out."

Now that immediately got Blair sitting on an upright position, completely facing him. Her features held worry, shock and a slight tinge of sadness for him. He smirked his usual smirk and shook his head.

"It's better this way anyway. I actually missed my suite."

Blair continued to remain silent and bore her eyes through him. She knew he was more hurt than he let on. And he knew that she knew and that just bothered him, so he turned to look away from her.

And suddenly he felt her figure snaking her arms around his body and soft chocolate curls leaning on his chest. She was trying to comfort him, he understood. Though she had never comforted him in this kind of way, it was almost his undoing because it surprised the hell out of him.

Nevertheless, he wrapped his arms around her as well.

Being comforted like this wasn't so bad…

"Blair…"

"I am so sorry, Chuck." She looked up at him. "I know you've always wanted to be a part of something, a family. I know. I get it. I've felt the same thing one too many times as well."

Chuck immediately shook his head in denial. "Waldorf, what are you – "

"Save it. You can't fool me. I know you."

And that was enough to shut him up.

They did start a new conversation though and then ending up talking for hours on end. It was fun. They were talking and laughing and teasing. Their conversations seemed never-ending like their kisses, and they both wondered how that was. It was whole new fascinating thing really.

Eventually, Blair yawned signaling how late it already was.

"Tired?"

Blair still smiled despite drowsy eyes. "There's still tomorrow for us, Chuck."

Chuck smiled tenderly. She was so cute like this.

"Sleep, Waldorf." _God, he was so sexy…_ "You can stay here on the bed." He raised his hands up mockingly. "I won't do anything _foolish_."

"Yeah, you'd better not."

He saw her secret little smile as she made herself get comfortable under his covers. He couldn't believe it. How the hell did he get so lucky so suddenly today? First no Blair all day now Blair was everywhere? It seemed so surreal, like a dream…except now was the only time he'd be falling asleep…_with Blair_, on _his _bed.

_Thank you Bart for kicking me out._

He himself got under the covers, readying himself for bed when he came face to face with her.

_Wow…_

He wasn't used to this. But he had to admit he kinda liked it.

And then another miracle happened.

She took his hand in his and squeezed it lightly.

_Wow…_

Yeah. He definitely wasn't used to this.

"Chuck?"

"Hmm?"

"So…" How was she supposed to say it?

"So…" He echoed.

Oh what the heck. "So what are we now?"

They never really had this kind of conversation before so that was another reason why everything got so screwed up with them before.

Chuck contemplated her simple question. Yeah. _What were they now? _Sure, they were back kissing and sweet and stuff, but even he wasn't even sure if they were considered friends given the history they've had. And so since he couldn't think of a proper answer, he decided to be considerate and asked her,

"What do you want _us_ to be?"

She thought her words carefully. "I don't want it to be like last time…at all."

Neither did he.

They stared at each other trying to figure out the answer to their never-ending questions. What were they? What was this? Would this be like last time? Would this be like forever? And the questions just go on and on.

It seemed eons later when Chuck broke the silence with the most _astounding_, most _considerate _question he had ever asked her, second only to _'Are you sure?'._

_"Do you want us to be together?"_

See? What's a girl to say right?

"Chuck…"

He was so vulnerable to her right now, completely opening up to her, she'd never seen such vulnerability like that ever coming from him. She realized she would be the only one he'd ever be that way to, that he never let any girl sleep on his bed like this, that he never just _made out _with them or that he never became considerate to them. Where was the whole _'rode hard and put away wet' _speech he gave her a month ago? Why was he being so nice to her now?

Was this for real?

"Chuck…I…"

And she gazed into his eyes and she saw that he didn't want to be hurt or rejected again by her and that he was actually putting out a lot being this way again with her…

Did she really have to think this through and overanalyze it? So it wasn't part of the plan. So what? Her life being in danger wasn't either but she was dealing. If she could deal with the bad, then she'd definitely love to deal with the good.

Archibald is gone.

And Chuck was before her.

_Always was, always will be…_

"Yes."

_See? Wasn't so hard, was it? _

She smiled dazzlingly – _genuinely – _as his features to that of confusion and shock and mixture of other emotions as if he couldn't believe what he just heard, what this moment meant.

"What?" God. The perfect time to be deaf.

"Yes, Chuck. I want us to be together." She squeezed his hand tighter to confirm her decision. "But…"

"But…" He slowly drawled, still anticipating that rejection.

"But I don't want it to be like last time. No more secrets, no more backstabbing schemes, none of that stuff, Chuck. I mean it, or it's over. We've hurt each other too much because of that." She raised her other hand to caress his face. This was hard for him too, she knew.

"Just _trust me, _Chuck. _Trust me."_

"And Nate?"

She gave him the most mysterious amused smile. "Let's just say we've _finally _come to a closure."

He took a moment to absorb the implication of that statement. Yet, his eyes continued to hold a certain amount of hesitance and fear.

_"Are you sure?"_

She kissed him, just like in the limo. Longer than a peck on the lips, soft and captivating his attention all over again.

She released him with a smile. "Yes. I'm sure. Just promise me nothing like before, Chuck and we'll be fine. _Please…_"

And he was happy to oblige. "I promise. I don't want it like last time either."

"Good." She kissed him sweetly on the cheek. "And with that said we shall now officially retire."

"I am quite tired."

"Yeah, I figured." A thought came to her and she kissed him again and said, "Goodnight, _boyfriend_." And then she snuggled closer to him and finally closed her doe-eyes.

_Wow…_

He'd never officially been a boyfriend before. He was shocked and scared out of his wits. He had no idea how things like this go. His only lessons were from Nate, and look how that turned out. He was so scared shitless because he really, _really _didn't want to hurt her again, and neither did he want to be hurt again as well. It was too painful…

But this wasn't. And he figured, why not? Change was good sometimes too.

And with that finally settled, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. _God, this felt good. _

He kissed her tenderly on the forehead. _Goodnight too, girlfriend._

Completely interlocked within each other's embrace, they both finally fell into a deep, blissful sleep.

Something the officially new couple never had in quite awhile.

* * *

The officially new couple's peaceful slumber was awakened not by the morning rays of the sunlight radiating from the windows but from the loud screams of the other person they almost forgotten was still there.

Until she started screaming to the top of her lungs early morn.

_WTF?!_

"Serena!" Blair yelled despite her drowsiness, completely annoyed her blissful sleep had been disturbed. "What's wrong? What happened?" Was there a fire or something?

The blonde just stared at them wide-eyed, horrified, shocked, and mortified. She couldn't even speak right. "You –" Pointing shaking fingers wasn't helping calm her spirits. "And _you – "_ She spat out venom towards Chuck. "You – and you – and you…" There were a lot of _you's. _She made her own assumptions as she saw them together. "_Oh my God…"_

Serena was literally pacing now, shaking her head, her hands, completely in possessed mode as if she didn't believe what she was seeing.

"_You slept with each other! I cannot believe you Chuck! This is completely beneath you!"_

_God, could her best friend scream._

"So? It's not like I haven't slept with her before. Not like I've never been _beneath _her..."

Blair slapped him on the arm and scolded him. "_Behave." _She hissed and his smirk stayed on forever.

"Oh my God!"

How did the situation suddenly get so complicated? _AHH!_ "NO! We didn't!" Blair screamed as well. She tried to amend her words… "Well we did, that's why I'm here, on the bed, but not like that and –" …to no avail. "We didn't. There was no…Oh I don't know!"

Beside her, Chuck smirked absolutely amused by this morning's events. But he did feel bad towards his companion and came to her rescue.

"Sis, it's not what you think, okay? We didn't sleep together like whatever your perverted mind is probably thinking." He pointed to their night attires, emphasizing his point. "See? Because if I did do whatever your perverted mind is thinking, your precious best friend would completely be rid of all her –"

"STOP!" Serena screamed, holding up her hand in despair and disgust. "Don't go on. Okay, I get it already!"

Blair finally realized how amusing and funny this whole situation was. What if she tried something else?

_Hmm…_

"Oh Serena?"

"Yes, B?" Serena said quite tiredly, as if dreading whatever her best friend was gonna say.

"I have to tell you something."

Chuck turned to face her. Was she really gonna - ? _No way._

Serena just waited in silence for her friend to say whatever she wanted to say.

"Me and Chuck are kind of together now…Hope you're okay with it…"

Just to say the least, Serena's reaction to that heavy of an announcement was hilarious, at least to anyone else who wasn't Serena.

To sum it up, She looked like she could've fainted right then and there. She threw her hands up in absolute surrender.

"Okay, you know what? I'm too hung over to deal with this. B, you and I will talk later without this _sleaze _in sight alright?"

"Five by five."

And Serena walked away to head onto the kitchen to fix herself some breakfast. Lord knew she needed it for energy.

_Seriously, Blair and Chuck official?! _Too much to handle, too much.

Meanwhile, back on the bed, Chuck turned to his new _girlfriend_ – _he was gonna have to get used to that – _and gave her a look of curiosity, wondering about her actions earlier, telling Serena just like that.

Blair just smiled and brought her hand up to his face. "I said I didn't want it to be like last time. _I meant that." _

And then Chuck just smiled, the happiest smile he had given anyone.

He suddenly took her in his arms and kissed her with all the love and passion he had in him. _God, he loved her._

They had started making out for just a few seconds when Serena suddenly screamed from the kitchen, with words loud and clear for their ears.

"STOP KISSING!"

She sounded like she was going to vomit. They broke apart and laughed at their blonde friend's reaction.

Yes. Beautiful morning indeed.

* * *

"So how are you feeling these days?"

Blair had skipped her morning her classes because she wanted to schedule an appointment with her doctor. It caught on to the privy eyes of Chuck and she definitely hated lying to him first thing but she very much couldn't share this secret with him. _With anyone._

Besides, anything regarding her condition would be the only lie she'd ever tell him. Everything else would be nothing short of the truth.

Blair smiled happily at the question and presented her daily diary on his table. "I've been good actually."

"Well, you look good." Dr. Wayne confirmed, approving. "You seem to be glowing. What's going on?"

"Well it's all there in that book." It was an assignment he'd given her. Everyday she'd have to write a piece of herself in that empty page book and every time she'd come by, he could read it and review anything that he could've missed during their sessions. It was also a way to keep track of his patient. Ms. Waldorf had proven to be an obedient one so far. "These days suddenly everything's so perfect. I'm patching up things with people I have _issues _with, I'm finally able to fight back those girls who are just so…_ugh_." She made a disgusted face. "Oh! And I'm with someone now…And I think I'm really happy with him or _gonna be _happy with him."

"I see. Seems like he has been good for you. Have you told him about your condition?"

Blair shook her head no. "I don't think I need to tell anyone. It'll just make them worry and I want to live a normal life right now without anyone looking at me with pity or whatever. Plus I am going to work hard to get better, _completely _better."

Dr. Wayne nodded his head in approval to her words. He took in the book she handed to him earlier and began silently reading her entries. So far, so good. She did mention a relapse but she was willing to do whatever it took to not let another relapse happen again.

She really was making progress in this short span of time.

"With that kind of thinking, it's possible to really get you better in no time, Ms. Waldorf."

Blair breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe she wasn't going to die and she was going to live happily ever after, forever... _with Chuck. _She wouldn't have to worry about anything anymore like hurting the people she loved by telling them about her condition. There was no need. She was going to get better, she'd make sure of it.

Dr. Wayne was thoroughly reading through her latest entries, everything was good so far until he saw something that caught his eye and shook the core out of him.

He read it again.

_And again._

_And again..._

He found his own heart began to pound as he read the lines that looked far too innocent in the eyes of others but were the most dangerous words a doctor like himself could ever read. Shock flowed throughout all his veins.

_No. _

How could this happen? Did they miss anything? How come he couldn't see it before?

Blair caught his sudden change of behavior.

"Is something wrong, doctor?"

He was reading the line over and over again before he finally looked at her smiling, beautiful face. How could he break her weak heart like this?

"No. I'm just overwhelmed with your words."

Blair smiled in appreciation.

What kind of a doctor lies to his own patient? But he had to investigate before he said anything. He wanted to prove to himself that maybe he was wrong, that his gut was wrong. It wouldn't be the first time.

Blair had left later on to head to school but he continued to stare down at the one line that completely caught him off guard. She was talking about the guy she was with and brought up a memory in her childhood...

_When I was a little girl, I couldn't play with Serena and Nate because my mom forbade me to do so. I found later I couldn't run like they could. I'd get sick if I do. So I would always watch from a distance as they played and ran around. But he was there for me, every single time…_

He underlined the lines that seemed quite too wrong for his liking.

_I found later I couldn't run like they could. I'd get sick if I do…_

And it drummed in his head over and over again, sweat dripped down his forehead. He had to investigate.

"I need every medical record of Blair Waldorf since her birth, immediately. I don't care how you do it, how you get it, I want them all and I want it pronto by my desk, at the latest tonight."

His assistant's eyes widened in horror.

"May I ask why, sir?"

_I found later I couldn't run like they could._

"I need to review her medical records with us as well. Every single one. I need every information there is of her. Since _birth, everything_." He carried on as if he didn't hear his assistant. He could only hear the words drumming in his head.

_I couldn't run like they could. I'd get sick if I do…_

_I'd get sick…_

_I couldn't run…couldn't run…_

"Sir, you're quite frightening right about now." His assistant commented. His boss was acting like a madman.

"How could we have missed it before?"

_I couldn't run…I'd get sick…_

"Missed what?"

"How come we didn't see anything before? I have to investigate before anything."

"What's wrong boss?"

_I couldn't run like they could…_

_Couldn't run…couldn't run…_

"I think there's something wrong with her heart."

_Couldn't run..._

His assistant began to understand his boss's intentions. "I'll get right onto it sir."

_I'd get sick if I do..._

* * *

Blair Waldorf emerged quite happily from the hidden hospital. This session went quite well and she was very happy that she actually had the change to live longer like everyone else.

She was so caught up in her own thoughts, she did not notice the figure just a few meters distance away from her, curious cerulean eyes watching her.

Blair walked in the other direction, heading for school, but the eyes of the hidden figure never left Blair's walking figure.

_What was Blair Waldorf doing in a place like this?_

At least, Georgina Sparks had a valid reason of being here.

She was here to meet up with her drug dealer, who was late by the way, much to her annoyance.

Now seeing her ol' friend's best friend coming out through that hospital, Georgina suddenly didn't mind the long wait.

_What was Blair hiding?_

This area was secretive, only to those who wish to keep their business top secret, so Georgina assumed she was keeping a secret.

_Was she pregnant? Was she mentally ill? Was she sick?_

Georgina's lips slowly twisted into a smirk. This was totally perfect. Another thing she could use against Serena. It was like God himself was blessing her with so much knowledge.

Oh and she'd definitely investigate what was up with Blair.

_Suddenly everything was so perfect._

Perhaps Blair Waldorf would play an effective role in Serena VanderWoodsen's destruction after all.

* * *

_To be continued..._

So there it is, another super long chapter. Kind of unsure of it. But I know Chuck and Blair need to be together _now _because the show won't let them. HAHA. More on Serena and Georgina next chapter.

I HATE JENNY! AAAHH. Oh boo-hoo. So you screwed yourself in your own party and then rum it up Blair's face after. God. UGH. Can't believe Blair was being nice to her. So screwed her father, she screwed Dan, she screwed Blair, and she screwed Eric... THAT'S HALF THE CAST PEOPLE! HALF THE CAST! RAWR.

Oh God, I saw the promo for the next episode. OMG. Team Chuck/Blair/Nate? Wonder how that'll turn out. Effective I'm sure but without not throwing punches at each other. How exciting! HAHA. Cant wait. At least they're FINALLY putting Chuck and Blair in the same effin room.

Will somebody please tell Dan THAT SARAH IS GEORGINA?! Ugh.

I'm getting scared for Serena. She's losing it. Oh God. We all need to pray for her.

Till next time.

R&R, s'il vous plait. :)


	9. Chapter 9: Absorbing Truths and Lies

**A/N: Aww…you guys are really sweet. Really, thank you so much for the reviews, I'm so overwhelmed by them, as per usual. Thank you, thank you, thank you! Love you all! Y'all rock!**

Okay so before you read on to this, I suggest you all, uhm… drop anything you're holding right now, a cell phone, a pen, a book… Coz I have this itty-bitty feeling that y'all are **NOT **gonna like what I'm about to write…coz… Oh well, you're just not. Even I know I'm not gonna like what I'm gonna write but I have to write it coz it's already thought it and oh dear, am I making any sense?

So with enough prayers, I hope that nobody throws their laptop at me, always handle everything with _care _and yeah…there. And you'd all still love me and this story and stuff like that…hahaha.

I've done my research again for this chapter. Should I site sources? Haha. So there.

P.S. I'M NOT EVIL!!  
JENNY IS!!

(takes deep breath) Okay, here goes nothing.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME IN ADVANCE k?

Enjoy. :D

* * *

_Oh God…_

"It's confirmed."

"There must be some mistake, did you double, no, _triple _check it?"

_No…this couldn't happen…They didn't see this coming…_

"Yes. Got the second opinion just like you asked. It's confirmed."

_Those words again…_

Dr. Wayne was at a loss for words. This was very unexpected. And that seemed to be the ultimate understatement of the year.

How could they have not seen this before? He gazed down painfully at the files his assistant retrieved for him. He didn't want to believe it, but there it was, right in his face, _mocking_ him. The medical records never lie.

_So…_

_She really was going to die._

And it wasn't even bulimia anymore that would eventually end her precious life. The bulimia only _worsened _her situation even more so. The only possible solution for his patient's survival was a heart transplant.

But her body had been so weakened by her bulimia, damaging and weakening too many parts and too many organs in her body, that she might not even make it through the operation. But, if she did make it through the heart transplant, she'd have another twenty to thirty or so years to live before eventually falling ill again. But he'd rather have that than her dying _now. _

She was _too young_.

She was only _17. _

"A heart transplant is the only possible way to save her." His assistant was saying now.

Dr. Wayne sighed. The pains of being a doctor. "I know. But due to her bulimia and what it's done to her, her body might not be able to handle an operation as extensive as that. It's too much of a risk to take. There is no guarantee she'll survive it."

"What do you propose we do?"

He sighed deeply again. "Well, we very much have to tell her first." He gave his assistant a despairing look. "Then we run a few tests to really confirm if it's back or not. We must be _sure_. We could still be _wrong._ Then what's best is for her to take medications that could prevent her from having her recurring chest pains while making her take a healthy diet. In the meantime, I'll be figuring out another way on how to cure this disease."

"I just don't understand." His assistant pondered. "How come she seems to not know about this?"

"Perhaps she's forgotten that part of her childhood." He shook his head. No. That wasn't the true reason.

"Eleanor Waldorf is rich and powerful to buy off doctors, even more so their silence towards _anyone _involved in the matter."

"Surely you don't think she - ?"

"Managed to keep this from her daughter for as long as possible? Yes. I do." A stern frown weighed his lips. "I'll confirm it when we meet face to face."

Blair's heart condition, as he discovered, had been around ever since she was a little girl. According to her previous medical records, her family tree had a long history of CHF or congestive heart failure, and that was how she acquired it at such a young age. She had fallen very ill then, was hospitalized and operated and for awhile her heart condition had been almost undetectable allowing her to everything normal kids were able to do.

_Until the bulimia began…_

Her heart condition was chronic, _recurring, _and so it could stop and come back anytime it wanted to. The bulimia probably triggered that and two years ago was the fatal test of whether Blair Waldorf would live or die.

Hospitalized in Manhattan's finest hospitals, her bulimia had reached its highest level and her life was being balanced on a thread line.

He read from a separate medical report that during the time, she had gone through a series of dangerous complications that almost cost her, her life. She had almost died on eve of September the third, age of 15, saved only through the lucky hand of a _miracle_.

Two years later, with her eating disorder still ongoing and her heart condition possibly returning, her situation was fatal more than ever.

He sighed and continued to read over and over again her life's historical records. Even he could not believe this. And he was the one tasked to perform the obligation of telling her and breaking her heart.

Sometimes he hated his profession.

Blair Waldorf was so full of life. Granted, she had her tragic moments, but she was still a very lively, high classed teenage girl, still not even completely a woman, no matter how she tried to be so.

Through her witty remarks, or bitchy ranting or wondrous stories he'd been hearing for practically a whole month, he had come to find that Blair Waldorf was more than she seemed to be. She dreamed of Yale, and dreamed to find that soul binding love. She hated vulnerability and so she covers them up through snide comments and cold stares. She was a stellar student, a loving friend - _at least to her one and only best friend -_, and an as whole, simple an remarkable person who would make a fine woman when the time came to be.

But that time would never come, he now realized.

She was withering away.

_Another life taken away…_

She really didn't deserve what the fates were handing out to her.

* * *

The knock on Dr. Wayne's door was soft but loud enough to startle him from his despairing thoughts.

When he caught a glimpse of chocolate brown hair slowly entering his premises, his heart gave a leap as he thought it was Blair Waldorf coming back for another consultation.

But when the visitor revealed her young, beautiful face, he found he had never met her before. He breathed a sigh of relief at that.

"Dr. Whitey, is it?" The cerulean eyed girl inquired.

"Wayne, actually." He corrected patiently.

"Oh."

She began to look everywhere but him and a thick silence ensued between them. _Who was this girl?_ He hadn't been informed that he was about to have another patient.

"May I help you with something?"

The girl finally looked back, her eyes conveying a lost look. "Yes, actually you can." She smiled pleasantly at him, her eyes watering up. "Is Blair Waldorf your patient?"

Immediately, the alarm bells in his head began ringing. This was a private hospital, hidden and meant only to those who wished to keep their business on the low. Their patient's confidentiality was a main priority, second only to their health.

"May I ask who you are?"

"I'm Georgina Waldorf, Blair's younger sister."

His eyebrows furrowed. "My patient never mentioned – "

She interrupted instantly. "Yeah, B never talks about me. I'm kind of like the black of the sheep of the family. Ran away, came back." She rolled her eyes, trying to be nonchalant about the situation. "It's more complicated than that. But we've patched up our issues so…" Her voice faded and she sighed.

He thought about it for awhile. "Well, Blair did mention she was patching up issues with people, I can assume you're one of them."

And Georgina _'Waldorf' _Sparks nodded eagerly, trying to portray the nice, innocent girl she was.

She paused for dramatic effect… "So…" …and gave him a look of dread and fear. She really should've just been an actress. "My sister's really…your…_patient?" _

He didn't answer her question. Instead he asked her another, much to her dire annoyance. "How did you find this place?"

"I followed her." Georgina bluntly told him. "B's been acting weird lately. I'm getting really worried. We've just patched things up, you know? And…surely you understand? What's wrong with her? I _need _to know."

"I can't – "

"Please…" Damn it, this guy was hard to crack. She gulped a heavy set of tears, letting her eyes water just enough to strike his heart. "She's my only sister…I love her...I know she had her condition before, but she's okay now right? She's okay? Right? Please tell me…I'm so scared…Nothing's wrong anymore right?"

And Dr. Wayne had to shut his eyes for a minute. A family member. _Of course._ How could he not explain this to her? Someone needed to know and if her sister was here now, then he had to tell her. It would help Blair more...

He truly had no idea who the person standing before him really was.

"I'm sorry. It's apparently worse now. We've just discovered that's she has a chronic heart condition, IHD."

Georgina's eyes widened at the revelation. And she almost gave away her stance when she almost smirked. _Almost. _"What's that? What about her bulimia? What?"

And Dr. Wayne, unknowingly and ultimately made the biggest mistake in his life when he explained to her exactly what was wrong with Blair, from top to bottom.

And Georgina took it all in, the lying, deceptive, calculating bitch she was, letting her brain absorb all the knowledge.

This was better than she had_ ever_ expected.

My, oh my, death had_ finally_ befallen on Snow White.

This was perfect. Another ultimate tool she could use in her plans for Serena.

Speaking of, she just couldn't wait to finally show her face to Serena Vander Woodsen at last.

Yep, the trip to Blair's private little hospital had been so worthwhile after all. She found so much more than she had bargained for…

_And the award for Stellar Actress of the Year goes to..._

_...Georgina Sparks. _

Oh, she loved it already.

* * *

Serena was looking through her practice scores for the SAT's while secretly pondering about the one person she would rather bury away forever when her dearest best friend, sitting beside her, started ranting about Nelly Yuki, smart ass brainiac who also had her eyes set on Yale too. Or so Blair was saying now.

And she very much managed to say Nelly Yuki's name in all the sentences she seemed to be forming this morning.

"…Nelly Yuki must be _destroyed." _Blair was now saying. Serena couldn't stand it anymore.

"Why do you keep saying her name?!"

"Because it's _Nelly Yuki!" _And Serena just laughed at the wonder that was Blair Waldorf. "Okay last week, all you could ever obsessively utter was _Chuck Bass, _now it's _Nelly Yuki_, what's next? _Daniel Humphrey?" _

Blair glared at her best friend. "Funny." Although Blair showed no signs of laughter. "And I would still be uttering that _disgusting pig's _name if he hadn't told me over the weekend that he would _deliberately _not take the SAT's!" Blair huffed in anger.

Serena just looked on amused. "Aah. And so the argument begins." She patted Blair's shoulder in feign sympathy.

Serena was enjoying this too much. "I guess brother Chuck's going to be having his hands full with such _prim _and _proper stellar girlfriend. _Can't wait to see what happens next."

Blair gave her a death glare at that come. "Don't push it."

Serena just laughed out loud.

Blair swiftly turned her head and saw incoming _boyfriend, _who she did _not _wish to see at all, barging through the girl's area. Blair did not usually smile at the sight of him today. Instead, she scowled.

"Eew, gross, incoming Chuck."

"Now, now, is that how you talk about your new boyfriend?" Serena was enjoying just _too _much for her liking.

"Whatever. You ready?" As she quickly tidied up her things so she could briskly make her exit and go far, _far_ away from Chuck as possible.

"No. I gotta wait for Dan. He's pretty stressed; he doesn't do well on tests." Serena explained as Blair rolled her eyes.

"Performance anxiety." As she finally got up, she made one last comment that she made sure to be loud enough to reach the ears of the man she had been avoiding all weekend. "At least _your _boyfriend's taking the SAT's, some others are so _unfortunate."_

"I'm just trying to cut back on the _performance anxiety_, as you've so mentioned just now. Chuck Bass doesn't have the time for SAT's."

Blair's features presented an even more agitated scowl, now that she was face-to-face with the man she currently hated. She was so angry at him right about now.

So with her SAT books that she carried in her arm, she blatantly shoved them in his arms in an angry motion.

"Whoa, easy, Waldorf, you could hurt someone with that."

Blair wasn't deterred and ignored his comment. "You are taking the SAT's." She practically commanded him to do so.

Chuck just smirked, amused at her angry features. "What part of '_Chuck Bass doesn't have the time for SAT's_' don't you not understand? And here I thought you were smart, Waldorf."

"And here I thought we were going to Yale _together_." She was getting redder and redder by the minute and Chuck just kept on looking amused.

"And that shall become a dream come true courtesy of a very eager person who is _dying_ to be _me _for the day."

If Blair could get any redder, she would've exploded. "You're _cheating _on the SAT's_?" _

"As if you didn't know."

"You can't."

"Too late I already paid the fellow."

"Then _un_pay him!" Blair yelled.

"Like I said, _too late_."

She tried to grasp for control once more. No need to yell in public. She gave him an irritated, forced smile and grabbed his school tie, inevitably forcing him to lean forward towards her, mere inches away from her face.

"Let me _repeat _myself once more so that I make myself _succinctly _clear." Repeating the words he had uttered to her almost a month ago. And then pronouncing each word so carefully, so _angrily_, he just wanted to gobble her up right then and there… "_You. Are. Taking. The. SAT's! _Or else…_"_

"Or else what?" Chuck challenged.

"_No sex!" _

_Really Blair, that's the best you've got?_

Chuck could've laughed out loud at this situation. He feigned an exaggerated heartache. "Oh. Oh crap... I'm _so_ torn up now I could kill myself by going through the SAT's… except _we're not having sex, remember? Your_ decision._ I_ gladly oblige to whatever your command is._" _And when he saw her pointed look, he held up a free hand. "Aah. Except for that one thing."

In the background, Serena was giggling in delight, completely enlivened by the latest show she was currently seeing. Perhaps Chuck and Blair did have some _very _entertaining moments after all. God, she totally forgot the _popcorn._

"So…no." Chuck was now saying.

"'_No_'? What you mean _no_?!"

Chuck's calm, collected demeanor continued to aggravate the brains out her.

"I mean _no_ meaning _'I refuse_.' Really, your vocabulary skills are in dire need of some tutoring, Waldorf."

"Why?!" Blair threw her arms in exasperation, completely ignoring his comment. "At least tell my _why!_" Calming down, she continued, "You're really smart Chuck, you're just really lazy, it's infuriating. Make something for yourself. It could be good for you in the long run."

For a minute, she got through him as something passed through Chuck's gorgeous face. But the look came as quickly as it went. "I just choose not to waste my time on such extremities."

Blair tried another tactic. "I could tutor you and who knows? We finally could get that _something_ going on after..." She seductively smiled and began pulling his tie even more so to her and before he knew it she caught him in passionate, sexual, mind-blowing kiss…yes, _in public. _

Gasps could be heard all around the area, cameras started flashing, Serena jaw-dropped behind them, and basically everyone in the area was in total shock mode.

_Whoa…_

_Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf making out in public! While in the middle of a heated argument? _

When Blair slowly pulled away, she thought she had _finally_ gotten through him. He leaned again towards her ear and whispered delicately, "It's a wonderful offer,_ love_ but…my answer remains the same."

Blair suddenly shrieked in absolute frustration and shoved her infuriating boyfriend away from her. "You are _insufferable!_ We are not speaking until you decide to change your mind! Keep the books, I'll get new ones."

And with that, she huffed off.

Chuck Bass just looked at her retreating with the most amused grin on his face. He felt sort of guilty for making so angry and he was being rightly punished for it, but studying was _not_ his thing _then_, so it won't be his thing _now. _

He turned and spotted his stepsister, mouth still agape from the public argument slash make-out scene, she along with half the school population just bore witness to. He sat comfortably beside her and began to drum his fingers on the books Blair had shoved up his face, contemplating for a minute.

"Eventually, the two of you will have to work out your '_issues'." _

Chuck swiftly turned his head to her, "What issues? I'm issue free. I am _not _taking the SAT's. That's final. Love's just going to have to deal."

"What is your deal anyway? She's just concerned for you." Serena argued.

Chuck groaned. "Not you too. And here I thought I was doing you a brotherly favor setting _you _free from _your _issues."

Serena instantly lighted up, just as he expected. "Georgina?"

"According to my very reliable sources, Georgina Sparks is nowhere near our fair aisle. She's in Switzerland. Dating the Prince of Belford."

"There's a Prince of Belford?" A nod. "And she's dating him?" Another confident nod and she breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh! Thank God!"

Serena couldn't be any happier! Yes, it was all just a scare. Nothing to worry about, nothing to fear, Georgina was no where near them and she was safe.

"Well you can enjoy the gifts she mailed you with peace in mind." He twisted his lips into his trademark smirk and leaned towards her. "And maybe Chuck in the room…"

"Oh shoot." Serena feigned regret and pushed him away with hand. "Except we're siblings and your _girlfriend _would have my head."

"Oh, she's used to it. She'll deal."

Her features turned into a warning glare. "Chuck…"

"I'm kidding! I'd never do that to her. And speaking of gifts, great idea sis, maybe you should mail them _to me_ so that _I _could enjoy them with said girlfriend. _Handcuffs_ would be a very good idea..."

"Eew! Stop!" And she fought an image slowly forming in her mind. "And yeah, sure Chuck, if she'd actually talk to you now. Good luck with that by the way."

"Please. She'll come around." He ignored her pointed knowing look and changed the topic. "Georgie always brought out the devil in you. It's like how I could bring out the devil in Blair…" He smirked to himself with that last statement and Serena had to make a disgusted face. Going back to the topic at hand, "So there's a part of me that's a little disappointed she's not here."

"Hmm…wonder which part." She drawled out sarcastically.

"It's been awhile since I saw the old Serena."

"Yeah well thanks to her, the new one has to make a 2000 on her SAT's. So if you could just smarm elsewhere," She began pushing him away and then said haughtily, "Obviously not to Blair because she's mad at you...so I don't know, study, somewhere perhaps?"

Chuck snarled, wishing he could wipe off that look of triumph on her face.

"Not happening. The offer still stands though." He said as he got up and grabbed his own things and apparently the books Blair threw at him. "I know this little lovely redhead who'd love to be you for the day."

Serena smiled sarcastically. "Leave the cheating to you, Chuck. I plan on taking the SAT's by myself." As he began walking away, she called out, "And unfortunately for you, _Blair _wants you to do so too."

He completely didn't spare her a glance, ignoring her comment and walking back to St. Jude's.

Serena shrugged; still giddy by the fact the Georgina was not in town like she had claimed in her gifts. Besides, they'll work it out if Blair had anything to say about it.

She really had no idea that the day was still too young for such assuming thoughts.

* * *

From the corner, Georgina Sparks watched as Serena Vander Woodsen playfully kiss her beloved boyfriend and send him running off to his next class. She shook her head in disgust.

_That boy has got to go._

Now that Serena was alone though…

"You always did know how to leave them wanting more."

Serena, startled beyond words, froze at hearing the voice. She'd recognize it anywhere. She slowly turned to the voice…

…and saw the last person she had wanted to see in the entire world.

_Oh my God…Georgina…_

She didn't realize she had spoken aloud her treacherous thoughts.

What was happening? Chuck had said…_Oh God…_

Georgina walked up to up her confidently, malicious smirk still in tact, clad in leather with a blue scarf wrapped delicately around her neck. Georgina was still as beautiful as ever, even more so now than before, which could meant one thing…

She was more deadly _now_ more than ever.

"What are you doing here?" Serena's voice slightly wavering before the presence of her old friend.

Georgina, as per usual, feigned innocence. "I told you I was coming. Didn't you get my gifts?"

It was that childlike voice she portrayed every single time that made Serena fear her more.

_Her heart was pounding…_

She was in denial. Chuck had said… "Uhm, you're supposed to be in Switzerland, dating a Prince?..."

"Lucky for me Daddy didn't need the G5." Georgina smiled enthusiastic about her own return. "Haven't you missed me?"

_No._

But she couldn't very well say that right?

"How could I not?" She spat out rather forcefully.

"Okay." Georgina rolled her wide innocent blue eyes. "You don't want to throw me a homecoming party, I get it. But…let's have a cocktail, catch up."

And those were the words Serena wished she never heard.

Where were the gods right about now? They needed to make her deaf so she could pretend nothing deadly was being uttered by Georgina's delicate lips and just walk away to a place somewhere safe.

She hesitated.

And Georgina's eyes gleamed.

"S…" Georgina took a step closer to her and Serena wished she could step back or run away. "You're really gonna hurt my feelings. And _you know_ how I get when my feelings are hurt…"

It was a threat masked intricately behind the innocence.

_Bitch._

She didn't have a choice. She had no choice when it came to Georgina. G knew too much that _nobody_ had to know.

So with all the strength she had in herself, she forced a _very, very _fake smile.

"Great. I'll see you tonight."

_So looking forward to it. _Serena thought sarcastically.

"It's so weird…" Georgina continued to drawl on. "Just seeing you, it's almost like I never left."

Georgina gave her one last wide smile filled with all the malice in the world and began to walk away from the blonde beauty, who unbeknownst to her own self, had been holding her own breath the entire time, feeling as if she wanted to faint and knowing she was a pale as a ghost.

_Oh God…was this really happening to her? _

She knew the moment Georgina walked back into her life again that everything would slowly fall apart.

_She wasn't wrong._

* * *

"Snow White."

Blair froze.

She hadn't heard that nickname in a year. And the person who had given her that pathetic nickname had been gone for an entire year as well…

_Was she hallucinating? Hearing things? On the verge of delusional?_

Shaking it off, she continued to walk off away from her school, into the direction that headed to her home. She continued walking until she heard it again.

"Snow White."

Blair finally turned...

...And came face to face with the Ghost of Parties Past, none other than Georgina Sparks, who had that permanent innocent smile-deviating-smirk that Blair always hated.

"Georgina." Blair greeted quite warily. _What was the bitch doing here again?_ Deadpanned, she said, "You're back. I'm surprised. Joy."

Georgina's enthusiasm earlier with Serena echoed now with her meeting with Blair at last. "I know! It's like I've never been gone. I've missed you though, B."

Blair held up all her defenses and coldly spat, "Let's cut the bullshit now, shall we?"

"Tsk, tsk." Georgina shook her head in mock disapproval. "_You _of all people know that swearing is a crime. You hate committing crimes."

"You mean just like how much I hate _you_?"

Georgina smiled even more so at that comment. "Oh come now. Let's catch up. We're so alike in our own ways, you know." She paused and gave her the most pointed look, indicating to the other brunette that she knew something no one should know. "How are you, B? How's your health?"

Blair froze again, suddenly cold. Georgina knew something, Blair could feel it.

"That's none of your damn business."

Georgina spotted a glimpse of orange cloth from afar, heading towards their direction. She gave Blair a smirk. "Really, Blair? _Chuck Bass?_ Who would've thought? If I had known you had it in you all this time, we would've gotten along so well before!" She laughed. _Dangerous, full of malice._

And Blair's eyes held a certain fear that Georgina did not miss. Could it be? The prim and proper, uptight Queen B had fallen head over heels for the Bad Boy Bass?

_This was too good to be true._

One year being far away and already so much has been happening!

"Leave _him _alone."

Georgina's eyes gleam with utter delight. "Why, of course Blair! Why, I would never...He's all yours honey." She smiled ruefully before she continued. "I have no interest in the bad boy womanizer. He's like my twin, you know? We're so alike. We like to play games and play with people. So... maybe you should ready yourself and be careful with your heart…"

"What are you playing at?" Blair hissed with venom.

Georgina continued to feign innocence much to Blair's annoyance. "Play? Oh B. I play but I'm not playing at all now, B! I'm _really _concerned. You're like my _'older sister'._"

"Bull."

And then Georgina leaned into her and whispered in her ear. "Have you told him about your heart condition?"

_What?_

"What?" _What was this bitch playing at?_ "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Dr. Wayne? Private hospital near the slums? Ring any bells to you?"

_Oh God…she knew…_

"I cannot believe you followed me around – "

"Don't sweat yourself, B." Georgina interrupted. "It could be hazardous to your health. Especially your _heart."_

"I don't have a heart condition!"

"Think again. Your doctor told me everything."

"And why would he do that?" Blair was seething now.

"Because I told him I was your sister." She smiled sweetly, _sickly. _And Blair wanted to run and vomit somewhere.

"How dare you follow me – "

Georgina cut her off again and her tone instantly changed to her true psychotic, evil self. "Do you really think that Chuck, womanizer of the Upper East Side, the '_Bad Boy Bass' _would stick to you and _only_ you?" Striking the knife where it would hurt the most, she added, "_In sickness and in health?" _Georgina gave laughed evilly, as if it was all just a game to her.

"Do you really think that when you're sickly and _withering away _in your glass coffin that he'll continue to look at you without _disgust_? That he won't go looking somewhere else for solace? He wouldn't want to touch his fragile, _sick _girlfriend, right? He might kill you in the process…And that wouldn't be good on his part…"

Blair's eyes watered. How could she respond to that? What heart condition? She only had a bad case of bulimia and she was going to get better! She was going to get better...She didn't need to worry herself with painful thoughts like that.

Georgina took a look at Blair's stance and sighed in mock sympathy. "Ooh, sweetie." She cooed, stroking Blair's hair. "Don't be so upset. Who knows? The Bass might surprise you, though I doubt it. Speaking of, he's coming up right behind you." She smiled again and patted her coldly on the shoulder. "Tell him I said hi."

And with that she turned and took off.

_No. _Chuck would never hurt her like that again…He wasn't…He'd never…

_But he had hurt her before…much more painfully than all the rest…_

And that's when she first felt it.

It started as a sudden pang, like a boom that only her inner organs could feel. It was soft, yet deadly and it soon escalated becoming more deadly with each pang... spreading, _merciless, _unbearable…

She clutched her chest, gulping the sudden burst of tears and wondering what kind of pain was suddenly taking hold over her. What was happening? This was _different_. Was this part of her bulimia? But she had been getting better…_What was happening?_

And then…

"Blair!"

_Oh God…_

She needed to compose herself, she couldn't let him see her like this. _Oh my God…Georgina was right… _She needed to suck up the pain and fight back the tears, Chuck Bass could _not _see her like this.

She finally managed it, _painfully _so and turned coming face to face with the man she had grown to love.

"I have purposefully come here in the hopes of offering you a ride home and attaining your forgiveness." And out of nowhere, out came a single red rose, which he held out delicately to her.

She gently took the rose and tenderly stroked its soft petals. She smiled, _happy. _That's what he always made her feel when he wasn't busy torturing or hurting her. She was surprised by the gesture, of course. He would never have done this with anyone else.

_Perhaps…Maybe…Georgina could be wrong…_

She gazed into his loving eyes looking tenderly down upon her and knew that Georgina was _wrong._

But then, she felt her chest throbbing in pain and she panicked. She had to cut him off.

"We're not speaking to each other, remember?"

Her tone and gaze were suddenly cold and unfeeling, and he suddenly wondered about the sudden shift of moods.

"What's wrong?"

That was the question she feared the most.

She lied and bit his head off. "Nothing. It's none of your business for now since you can't even bother to be a better man and instead, heading straight on to cheating. If this were real life, you'd probably cheat on me too."

_Aah…and Georgina's words filled her head once again._

Chuck stared back at her incredulously and thought _WTF? _He'd never cheat on her! _EVER!_ So he'd cheat in an exam, that didn't mean he'd cheat on her! _God._ _Where did she get her ideas?!_

"Blair – "

"Save it, Bass."

And then she walked off and let the tears flow freely. Her chest hurt so much, she was in danger and she had to get away from him.

He couldn't know whatever it was she was going through.

Chuck just looked on to her retreating figure, completely rooted on the spot, jaw dropped and with the one liner question that filled his very newly conflicted mind.

_What the hell just happened?_

* * *

He was still thinking that same one liner question two nights later as he now made his way up to the Waldorf penthouse.

"Lucky for us mental acuity and common sense really come in the same package." He heard her saying as the elevator doors dinged open.

The sound girls laughter and the smell of scented candles and lavender filled his senses as he stepped into the home of his girlfriend.

And as he caught on to what was happening within the Waldorf penthouse, he suddenly wished he didn't come. He wanted to talk to her in _private._

Blair had invited her old clique over and they were have a nightly study spa thing that he did _not _wish to take part of.

_Great. How'd she manage to win them over again anyway?_

The girls had completely stopped laughing and focused their newfound attention on him, and he was slightly uncomfortable with the interested, privy stares, cell phones in hand, ready to divulge to Gossip Girl.

_Okay, stop. Not the point. You're a wuss. Focus Bass. _

He held onto the books he carried on his left arm even tighter for strength or courage or whatever it was he needed to get through the night. _Or at least this moment. _

Blair's surprised, wide doe-eyes locked onto his and suddenly, his determination had returned.

"What are you doing here, Bass?"

_Yes, what was he doing here?..._

He took a deep breath and finally said,

"I came here looking for tutor."

_Whoa…_

_That could only mean…_

Blair put her drink aside and stood up, her knees wobbling at his humbling actions. She momentarily forgot that her old clique was still very much around, watching with _great_ interest as the scene transpired before their eyes.

"Chuck…"

"And I just wanted to tell you that I would _never _ever cheat on you." Blair's eyes widened at his sudden speech. Behind her, they both heard the gasps of their audience. "I may not be Nate. And I may have done a lot of _things _you might not approve of, but one thing for sure is that is that I would _never_ hurt you like that…

"Not now, not _ever…" _And he said that with all the honesty his heart could carry.

"Chuck…" Blair was dead speechless. _This was…he was…_His actions now were _not his usual._ He really was putting a lot _for her_. And _yes_, she believed _him_ more than she believed _Georgina. _

"Can we just forget this, please?" He gave her the most charming smile. "Besides, I'm going to need all the concentration if I'm going to be studying for the SAT's."

Blair genuinely smiled in happiness at his last remark, squealed involuntarily and wrapped her arms around him, catching him off guard.

He smiled in her hair, glad this little fight was all over and they were back to normal. He decided he'd be staying over tonight and they'd probably head on to the SAT exam center together.

Blair finally let go, realizing there was still other company and turned to them, smile very much in place.

All their jaws had dropped straight onto the marble floor, their eyes popping out and their entire bodies completely frozen. It was kind of amusing.

_Behold. The man behind the devil. And boy, was that man a charming sweetheart! Not to mention, HOT! _

_Wow… Could it be? Is it for real? The Bad Boy Bass in love with the once again rising Queen Blair Waldorf?_

_This was too much…_

_Even Gossip Girl would freak._

"Girls. Would you mind if a certain Bass intrude in tonight's study activities?" Blair asked considerately. They just stared back dumbly, still obviously in a state of shock.

Penelope was first to recover. "Hazel," She turned to her friends still frozen. "I'm sure we wouldn't mind if a guy like that would grace his presence in a girl's evening such as this, right?"

Hazel stuttered, amazed. "Yeah…sure…We could make this one exception."

"Besides, he's taking the SAT's. He's gonna need all the help he can get." Isabel added teasingly.

Chuck smirked in amusement. Blair smiled in delight and kissed him lightly on the cheek, shocking the heck out of them all. "Thank you."

"You're very much welcome."

And as he sat himself on the couch with Blair, he added, "But this does not come lightly, Waldorf. I'm staying for the night."

Blair blushed and the girl's eyebrows raised in juicy excitement at the announcement. They'd have to give some space to their benefactor, of course. They had much to dish about to Gossip Girl and everyone in town!

_Ooh la-la. Wonder what could come out from that study rendezvous?_

* * *

_To be continued..._

So there you go.

God, is proofreading really hard. I'm getting used to it. HAHA.

Oh God. I'm already bracing myself. AAH. AHH. AHH. Must prepare myself for the reactions of the public. Uhm...don't be too mad?...pretty please with cherries on top?

Okay, so I just saw the extended promo for the next episode and I was like... WTF?! SHUTUP GEORGINA!! Really, CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL DAN, THE NEWEST CONNED DUMBASS IN TOWN (no offense, i love him...but...but...) THAT SARAH IF F-ING GEORGINA?!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!! I CANT WAIT TILL MONDAY. IT'S KILLING ME...HELP. AHH. FINALLY THEY'RE THROWING CHUCK AND BLAIR IN SCENES TOGETHER!! GOD DAMN THAT WAS ONE LONG WAIT. And if they just DONT GET TOGEHTER SOMEHOW, SOMEDAY, I am really SMASHING MY TV in frustration. RAWR. RAWR. RAWR.

P.S. Jenny's evil :p Oh yeah. I totally forgot about her. Oh damn. Oh well maybe next time.


	10. Chapter 10: Secretive Best Friends

**A/N: Thank you for all your reviews and comments! I'm so glad you're all okay with it. The comments are heating up regarding Georgina…HAHA. Oh trust me, you're just gonna hate her even more as the story progresses. **

I always figured that G's someone who wouldn't exactly like B, the all time best friend of S, the girl she's trying so hard to ruin because S didn't want to be friends with her anymore.

I just thought she'd have that specific kind of resentment against B and I sort of wanted to use that. G's the devil of S, B's the one who sobers her up and G doesn't want S sobered up so she hates B for always trying to take S away from her like that. Iono, it's how I picture it. Kind of a psychotic, friendship triangle. : P

Okay enough analysis.

Enjoy this chapter. It'll be my last until I'm able to watch the next episode which is like...later. (Cant wait!) :D

Sorry. Haha.

* * *

Daniel Humphrey was a typical guy.

Typical guys liked normalcy, they liked things to be serene and non-turbulent, and they liked things settled. Typical guys did _not _like arguing with their girlfriends, did _not _like arguing with their newly bitched-up sisters, did _not _like feeling as if they didn't know who said girlfriend and sister have become – _or are slowly becoming -. _Typical guys did _not _like guys like _Chuck Bass_ hovering all over their girlfriends, because even though he got himself his own girlfriend, guys like _Chuck Bass_ would not give much meaning to something as serious as a relationship, therefore they could still do anything they wanted.

Chuck Bass was_ not_ a typical guy.

And apparently, Chuck Bass was the man Serena, _his _girlfriend, was running to these days, much Dan's great disapproval _– and jealously -_.

He didn't trust the guy. Period.

And yes, he sort of felt jealous that Serena would run to _him_ in her time of need_, _instead of him.

_Seriously. _What was going on with that girl lately?

He, typical Brooklyn guy, wanted normalcy to return.

Everything had been okay. _Great, _even. And then, _Chuck _came along, after ruining things with Blair and then deciding to slowly ruin things between him and Serena.

He knew there was something she was hiding. Quite the obvious to a _keen _eye, really. But she could trust him, _completely_. He would never turn her away. But no, she just had to _not _take the SAT's, and the run off into _Chuck's _arms. God, she had even cut _him_ out. _That hurt. _Beyond anything, really.

And that was why he was out here by the park, early morning, just gazing at the lake, the beautiful sky, all of nature's beauties he could see before him, trying to calm himself, trying to just block everything that was currently happening and just trying to get some sense of control.

_Some sense of normalcy…_

He found it quite a wonder that while everyone's lives were slowly becoming chaotic, the sun still rose up and the earth still spun, unbothered and tranquil.

His short lived peace was suddenly interrupted by an incoming Labrador dog running after it's ball. He immediately got up and helped the dog catch it's little ball.

"Oh! There you go, buddy!" He always did have a knack for dogs.

A girl, the dog's owner he assumed, came running after her dog. "Ooh." She said in a reprimanding tone, "_Georgie_... Hey! Bad boy…" And then she quickly leashed her dog so she could better control it, just in case it decided to disturb someone else's peace.

She finally looked up to him, big, wide, cerulean eyes catching him off-guard.

"I'm sorry he disturbed you."

"Uhm…It's fine, I love dogs." Dan replied easily.

"Really? Do you have any?"

"No…Uhm, we used to have a cat." And then he just started being his old babbling self. "You know, sister. Allergies. Then the cat, Iggy. Lives at Fort with my Grandma. Doesn't write. _Never _calls." Oh wow, he could go on and on.

The stranger just laughed on at his little story-babble. _Cute._ "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's just a cat." Dan said finally getting to his senses that he was babbling to a stranger.

There was an awkward silence for a second. Until, "I'm Sarah." The girl introduced.

"Dan. Nice to meet you, Sarah." He said pleasantly as he shook her hand.

Georgina Sparks smiled charmingly in return.

So this was Serena's new boy toy. He was kind of cute. Very gullible, she added. The game was so on.

And Serena would sweetly pay for throwing her out of her new _perfect _life once again. No one just throws her out like a piece of trash.

She'd show that blonde bitch who she really was messing with.

Oh boy this day was going to be _lovely. _

* * *

"So what brings you to New York?" Dan asked as he and _'Sarah' _now strolled along Central Park.

He'd found she was easy to talk to, very open-minded and cool about almost everything. It was refreshing and he found he needed a new friend like her to talk to, someone new and open and not from the Upper East Side. Things there were just _too _complicated and he just wanted to take a break from it all.

"My sister."

That quirked his eyebrow and his interest. "Sister? What's up with your sister? Something happened?"

She took a moment to gather her thoughts; Dan could see she looked kind of conflicted, lost even. He wondered why that was.

"She has a heart condition."

And he wondered why no more.

To say that he was shocked beyond all words was an understatement. Sympathy overflowed within him for this girl, who was practically lost in this city, a newcomer, fleeing the comforts of her original upbringings just to be there for a sister who possibly had no chance of living.

Wow. And he thought he had problems.

"I – I'm sorry. Really. I can't imagine what you must be going through."

She smiled, trying to be strong. "I know. What pains me more is that me and my sister never really got along before. We've only patched things up recently but this…This is too much. I…" And Georgina let those watery tears fall to complete her act. "I don't even know what to do anymore…She needs a heart transplant to live. I wish I could give her that but…"

And now she was really crying and Dan felt the pain she was feeling. How horrible could the fates get? Life was too cruel.

He was typical guy. Typical guys were kind and sensitive, even to strangers. He felt so bad for this person. It just shows how much one should value life, something most people like the ones from the Upper East Side never do.

And so he pulled her to him and let her cry on his chest. Nothing wrong with it. He was just trying to comfort a new friend. Besides he thought she deserved a shoulder to cry on. She looked like hadn't even let herself break since the news.

Engulfed in the arms of Dan and buried in his chest, Georgina finally let herself smirk. _God_, how she _loved _playing this game! Being someone else other than herself.

She was victorious._ Invincible_ even.

Serena would lose everything she ever cared about in her new precious life, everything she ever worked so hard for, everything she had right now, Georgina vowed.

_Starting with this new boy toy of hers. _

Serena would come to learn the hard way that throwing Georgina in the trash once again and hurting her feelings by becoming someone she wasn't destined to be, would be the _worst_ mistake she ever made in her entire life.

Dan released her from his embrace, trying to not let the moment last too long, just in case she got the wrong idea. But he was a friend no less, and as a friend he needed to help her, so…

"Hey, I'd really like to help you out, I feel really bad for your situation now. So you know, if you need anything, like say, a companion to go with when you visit your sister in the hospital, just let me know okay? I'd love to meet her."

_Oh my God..._

Georgina felt like crying even more, which she did to add to the dramatic effects. Oh, was everybody blessing her today or what? She smiled her most grateful smile she could muster.

"Of course! I'd love that. Thank you, thank you so much! You have no idea what this means to me!" _This was too perfect. _

"She'd _love _to meet you, Dan."

And by the way, who would've thought that the Snow White's little illness would be the key to making all her plans a dream come true?

She'd destroy them.

_She'd destroy them all…_

_Let the games begin, S._

* * *

Blair Waldorf found herself once more returning to her private hospital, two days post SAT's.

And as she stood before her doctor's door, dread and regret began to seep within her.

Did she really want to know if she was going to die or not? _For real this time? _

Not like last time wasn't real but she could make herself get better at the time, there was still hope that she could still live if only she abided by the rules.

After what seemed like decades, Blair knocked cautiously on her doctor's main door before slowly entering it.

And coming face to face with a man she had never met before.

For a moment, she thought she had gone through the wrong door and she began to turn away, the man in the huge glasses spoke,

"You must be Blair Waldorf."

She whirled back around, confused. "Yes. I am. Who are you? Where is Dr. Wayne? Is he absent or something?" _What was going on?_

The man gave her a look of sympathy before he answered. "I am sorry Ms. Waldorf but your doctor no longer remains within this facility. I am Dr. Thompson, replacing for him and am now in charge of taking care of all his patients, lest _they_ decide to let me go."

_What? _

"What are you talking about? Why is Dr. Wayne not here anymore? Where is he?" Blair threw the many questions at him, becoming frantic. She wasn't comfortable with this new one. She didn't like him at all.

"Dr. Wayne's license has been revoked. He has been fired and no longer working in this facility or any facility for that matter, and he is now currently being questioned by the authorities." Dr. Thompson answered patiently.

_Oh my God…_

"Why?" Although she already had a feeling what the reason was.

"It has been discovered that Dr. Wayne had carelessly leaked information to a person we discovered is not even a family member of yours. No siblings, I presume?"

She shook her head, suddenly so numb.

"I suspected so. Confidentiality of our patients is our top most priority second only to their health and this breach of contract has been dealt with accordingly. I am truly sorry though it had to be this way." He nodded at her sympathetic once more.

Blair decided she hated him.

She couldn't believe it. The one and only doctor she had grown to trust and actually like was suddenly _fired_. _God…_ Her eyes were watering. This was Georgina's doing. Georgina had been the cause of this. One man's life profession has been taken away because she manipulated him for information. _God, she wanted to hurl…_

She hated Georgina with every fiber of her being.

The new doctor was droning on but Blair wasn't paying attention. She wasn't until he finally mentioned her condition.

"Wait." She finally interrupted. "So, there's really something wrong with my heart?"

He nodded. "Based on your medical records, it's what we've come to discover. But you'll be given a full examination, just so we can really be sure."

The numbness suddenly became lightheadedness.

_Oh God…_ _Was this real?_

"I understand that you also have a serious case of bulimia, which makes your situation even more delicate than ever. Everything is all interconnected now. Anything that you do affects your heart even if you don't realize it." He continued to drawl on.

Blair just nodded, taking it in. It was like her first time again, when it was a different doctor telling her about her condition. God, she had _two _conditions now. _That _was how _unhealthy_ her filthy body was. _Shit…She really wanted to hurl right about now…_

And much to her great chagrin, he began to interrogate her.

"Tell me, Ms. Waldorf, do you experience a lot of fatigue?"

She nodded. _Didn't everybody?_

"Do you sleep well?"

She nodded again. And then, thought about it, "Sometimes, I stay up late. It's hard to sleep sometimes. I don't know why."

Dr. Thompson scribbled something in his pad. She hated feeling like she was being judged.

"Do you experience any shortness of breath? Like say, after purging? Or even, in any physical activity whatsoever?"

She thought about it. She did have moments like that. But she only thought it was normal because she was tired. She just nodded to him.

"Do you experience any chest pains?"

She nodded quickly, wishing he'd change the topic. She didn't want to remember the day when she suddenly had one and worse, Chuck had to be there!

_God…What was wrong with her? _

All the doctor kept asking her were just stuff normal people experienced right? She was bulimic too. Bulimic people could also experience the stuff he had asked right? She refused to believe there was something wrong. No. She couldn't. Georgina was wrong. Georgina was just taunting her. No. Dr. Wayne's profession wasn't taken away from him.

She was back to being in denial once again.

Her new, infuriating doctor just kept scribbling and scribbling on his pad. _What the hell was he writing? _She felt useless. She refused to be scared. Nothing was wrong with her. All she had was bulimia. And she'd fix that. She'd get better.

She needed to get out of this place…

"I'm sorry doctor, but what's really wrong with my heart? All the stuff you mentioned is stuff people experience everyday." She spoke, interrupting his hastened movements.

Dr. Thompson finally put aside his pen and pad away. He gave a grave look before he spoke. "Ms. Waldorf, what you have is a serious condition. All of the things I have mentioned earlier are indications that your heart is not pumping properly.

"We have identified you to have congestive heart failure or CHF. Heart failure typically develops slowly after injury to the heart, which we've discovered you've had at the tender age of 4. Also, your family tree has been having a long history of heart diseases and, unfortunately it has been passed on to you…"

Blair found herself difficulty of breathing as he continued his tirade. _No, no, no, no! _

"Too much strain on the heart is placed on the heart because of the many years of untreated high blood pressure, a deceased heart valve and even additional symptoms caused by your bulimia. As the heart muscle weakens, it needs to pump harder to keep blood flowing to the body. Most people don't think they have heart failure because they simply think they're tired or the symptoms are common to all." He explained further.

_Oh God…_

Blair felt the tears well up again. _No. _This wasn't happening. This just wasn't! This was a very, _very _bad dream she just had to wake up from. She…

"So what happens to me now? Isn't there any treatment for this?"

"Right about now, we're going to have diagnose you, use a number of tests to rule out or confirm your heart failure. If it's confirmed, we'll be giving a series of therapies, such as the ACE inhibitor and the diuretic therapy." He paused and gave her a grave look. "But judging from your medical records since childhood, it seems that surgery is the best option to completely eradicate this disease."

"So I'll get a surgery. No problem." Blair immediately said. Whatever it took to get better right?

He sighed and shook his head. "The problem is your bulimia has already weakened a number of your other organs, such organs that will be needed for your survival. Putting your through such an extensive surgery is a risk. There's a chance you might not make it through it."

The tears rolled down her cheeks before she even knew it.

"So that's it? That's it? There's no hope for me? I'm just gonna die?" She began to slowly stand up. She couldn't accept this...Why couldn't she even have the chance for surgery? Why? Why? _Why?!_

Dr. Thompson tried his to quell her mood. "We'll do our best to prevent the progression the disease but nothing is certain…"

She couldn't even hear him the minute he spoke. She seriously regretted ever going here. She did _not _believe this. She couldn't. She couldn't! She was not going to die! She wasn't…She wasn't…

_What about Chuck?_

The thought made her burst out the doors, much to the alarm of her new doctor. But he couldn't stop her. No one could.

She ran and ran and ran, tears pouring, out the hospital doors and up the streets, ignoring the sudden chest pain that was starting to form due to her sudden strenuous activity. She suddenly had a flash back from her childhood. Once upon a time, she couldn't run like how normal people could. And now, it seems she was going to have to go back to her no ability to run again.

_God..._

The thought of her dying was not processing in her mind. _She couldn't. She wouldn't._ She kept repeating in her mind.

She finally stopped running when the pain got too much, even she couldn't handle it. She clutched her chest and held a hand onto the wall on the sidewalk.

People passed by but they didn't really mind her. They thought she was just going through a dramatic moment.

She wasn't.

She was dying.

She was _really _dying.

And this time, there was no hope for her to get out of this unscathed.

And after being in denial, she finally let it enter it her mind completely.

And her tears fell harder.

In the past, she wouldn't have minded. A month ago, death was fine with her. Nothing had meant anything to her. Nothing was worth living for anymore.

_And then Chuck came along again…_

And he made her so happy beyond anything. He…He made suddenly had power to make everything worth living for.

She finally let herself admit that she was in love with him and suddenly she finds out she's dying?

_Oh God…_

Was she being punished for all the bad things she had done before? Did she really have to pay that price with her life?

_What about Chuck?_

_What would happen to him if she left him like that?_

_God…_

How could she do this to him? Hasn't she hurt him enough in the past already? She couldn't… And now they were finally together again… And she could finally admit that she was in love with him…

She just _couldn't _die!

She cursed herself and cursed her weak body and weak heart.

Why did she have to be this way?

She hated herself now more than ever. How was she supposed to deal with this?

She collapsed on the stone grounds, not caring whether people would stare at her, completely washed down, defeated and broken.

_Georgina was right after all._

_Georgina was right about everything…_

_God…she hated Georgina…_

* * *

_Georgina. _

That was the one thought in Serena's mind as she sat on the bar counter of Chuck's suite, downing one last shot. She didn't want to get drunk. _No. Not again._

She just wanted to feel a little better.

Saturday just happened to be the worst day of her entire life.

First, she woke up not knowing who she was, where she was, how she get there, then she missed the SAT's, much to her anger because even _Chuck _had been able to take them, then she completely cut off Dan when he already knew she was lying and then she ran to _Chuck, of all people, _like she did now, completely at the mercy of him.

And whose fault was all that?

_Georgina._

_Bitch._

And so, yesterday she had told her off. Cut her off like she cut off Dan. Only with Georgina, she wanted it to be _permanent_. She wanted Georgina completely out; no one was going to threaten this life that she worked so hard for. _God, _what the hell did she want? Because _no, _she didn't want to party or get drunk. _No, _she had her own idea of fun now.

And that fun did not _include _Georgina anymore.

And Dan…he couldn't know. He couldn't…He'd never…He…_God, she needed another drink…_

"Easy there, sis." Chuck said as he watched her scramble for another shot. "Don't want the Brooklyn boy to come storming in here again."

"Georgina needs to stay away." Serena said as she slammed the glass down.

"Yes, she does." Chuck agreed. "And I'm sure you took care of that."

"I need to fix it with Dan…Retake the SAT's or something to make up."

Chuck shook his head in disapproval. "Trust me; you don't want to do that. I don't know what possessed me to follow Blair but SAT's? Not fun. I think I've flunked it. So now, thanks to her, there won't be any college for me."

Serena smiled in mock sympathy. "Aww… _Chuck Bass_? Actually vying for college? Never thought I'd see the day."

Chuck laughed. "Yeah, neither did I. It's all Blair's fault."

Serena smiled, quite happy for her step brother despite her own situation. He's really changed, she could see. He's still pervy Chuck, of course – _apparently that can never be erased - _but there were these moments when he'd actually be someone she could _count on,_ someone she could _trust_, a _good_ guy and the _big _brother she never had.

He must really care for Blair if he'd let himself be influenced by her.

And maybe, just maybe, he was good enough for Blair; even after all the crap he put her through. Time and time again he'd proved in his own little way that he was in love with her best friend.

"I'm sure you made it. Don't worry." Serena said sincerely, getting a raised eyebrow from Chuck in response.

"Wow, sis. I have to say I'm flattered. You concerned for me?" He smiled playfully. "Never thought I'd see that day."

"Oh shut up. I'm concerned for my best friend and that's why I'm saying this." Serena bit back. She knew she didn't mean that, of course. Chuck was starting to grow on her; she just never would admit that _ever._

"Speaking of best friend, where has she been all day?" Chuck asked.

Serena began to wonder too. Blair never came in to class today, never called to tell her what was up and Serena was too caught up in her own world to check up on her.

She felt a bit guilty for that.

"I don't know. She didn't come to school all day and she didn't call me either." Serena responded.

"I've been calling her all day. It heads straight to voice mail. I'm getting worried." Chuck said. His tone did carry that worry, like how Dan got on Saturday with her.

She didn't want to think about that now.

Somehow, Blair missing got Serena all knotted up inside.

_What if Georgina…?_

No. No. Georgina wouldn't do that. She couldn't do anything to Blair. Blair was fine.

"I'll call her." Serena volunteered.

She took out her phone and dialed Blair's number. It rang and rang for a moment until…

"Hey, S…" Blair greeted, not quite her usual self. Serena instantly knew something was wrong.

"Blair!" She shared a look with Chuck.

He breathed a sigh of relief knowing nothing bad had befallen on his girlfriend. Funny, in the past, he couldn't care less what happened to her. Now, he was all over her, worried and frantic and slowly turning into Brooklyn boy. _Shit. _

"Hey, B." Serena was saying now. "What's wrong? Where have you been all day?"

It took a long, _long _while for Blair to respond and that got Serena really going. Something was up with Blair. Something that resembled a sob escaped from the other side of the line.

"B?"

"I'm sick." Blair finally said. Serena could hear the tears even from the phone.

Serena sighed, _relieved_. She thought it was something serious. Not like this wasn't, but Blair would get better by tomorrow of course. Blair never liked being sick so she tended to cry at times when she was. Like now.

"Oh sweetie, that's alright. Okay here, make sure you take a hot bowl of soup and take your medicine k? And you'll be back and up in no time." Serena instructed, her motherly instinct on Blair taking over.

She really had no idea about the depth of her best friend's simple words.

"Alright." Blair simply responded. "Hopefully, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Hey, I'll pick you up, k? We'll go to school together." Serena offered. No way was she letting Blair go alone.

"Alright." Blair just agreed.

"Rest well k? Love you, B!"

"Love you too, S…"

They hung up.

A moment of silence ensued between the two step siblings.

"Well? What's wrong with Blair?"

"She's sick." And on Chuck's ever more so worried look, she added, "Don't worry, she'll get better by – "

But he was already on the move, grabbing his coat and cell phone and whatever else he needed.

"I'll go see her." Chuck simply said. He was moving so quickly she could barely register from her spot what was going on. "Help yourself with the drink, stay the night, whatever you want."

And with one last look before he headed out his own suite,

"I'm staying with Blair. I'll take care of her."

The door slammed shut at Chuck's departure.

Serena stared back, rooted to the spot, completely dumbfounded.

See? Chuck did have his moments.

* * *

There was a soft knock on her door.

And even if it was just a small sound, Blair wanted it to go away because it felt like there were loud banging drums in her ear.

"Go away, Dorota! I'll take care of myself."

The door opened nevertheless, much to Blair's annoyance, to reveal not her trusted maid but the man she was currently in love with, her boyfriend…

_Chuck…what was he doing here?_

"I'm not Dorota, and I'm here to take care of you."

He acted as if he owned the place already.

She couldn't ignore the sudden rush of her heart beating.

If her heart couldn't properly pump blood these days, why was it with Chuck around it felt it was pumping as properly as it should be and even more so?

"Why aren't you on the bed?" Chuck wondered in bafflement and incredulity.

True, she wasn't lying on the bed as she was supposed to. Instead, she sat crouched down on the floor, with her back leaning against her bed's mattress. She'd been sitting there, crying all day. She wasn't going to lie on the bed now.

Chuck had other plans for her though.

He shredded his coat, then made his way to her, scooping her up in one movement and then gently laying her on the bed. She protested, but he wouldn't hear of it.

"_No." _He stated firmly. "You're sick. My turn to command the ship."

And all she could do was shut up and let him '_command the ship'_, or so he termed.

He suddenly bolted out of her room and she wondered where he had gone. She then laid back on her pillows when he didn't come back after awhile.

She thought of her current situation. If Chuck found out, what would he do? She wondered. Stay or run away as far as possible?

A part of her – the part that loved him like hell – wanted him to run away for the reason that she didn't want to see him hurt. Chuck was a great guy when he wanted to be. He was rich and handsome, smart if he just put himself into it. He was passionate and sweet, charming in his own Chuck way and he could really love someone and show it in the smallest ways. He was no Nate and Blair was actually glad that he wasn't.

A guy like Chuck deserved to be with someone who could give him the_ forever_ she'd always dreamed of with Nate. Someone he could grow old with and live happily ever after with.

That someone was obviously _not _her anymore.

The other part though, - the selfish part of herself – wanted him to stay for the reason that he was the only one who could make her feel any better and that if she were to die far earlier than all her friends and family, she'd want to be happy till the very last moment and she'd want_ him_ to be there beside her.

_Shit. _

She slapped herself for already thinking such morbid thoughts. _God…what was she going to do now? _

Her train of thoughts ceased abruptly as Chuck made his way back into her room, a tray in hand.

She paused. "Chuck, what's – "

"Ssh. No speaking for you."

_Okay... Commando - type much? _

He put the tray on her bedside and climbed on top of _her, _pulled her upright, startling her, and began undressing her, again much to her surprise.

She somehow managed to stop his swift hands. "Chuck, stop. Wait. Don't you think if we're going to make love, you could at least warn me?"

Chuck gave her the most sarcastic smile ever and sighed, counting to ten, she assumed.

"Blair," He began as if talking to a child. "I'm trying to undress you so that I could change you into something much comfortable so that you don't have to strain yourself by getting up."

_Oh…_

She just bent her head in embarrassment, trying to cover up her blush. That was actually sweet…in its own Chuck way. See?

At her silence, he continued to do what he started, not pausing to stare at her body the way he usually did, quickly took her silk pajama top from the cabinet and began to gently dress her up again.

"You look hot, by the way." He quietly commented.

She blushed again.

"If you weren't so sick right about now, I'd have ravished you already." He gave her a pointed look. "And no, I wouldn't warn you."

They shared a short laugh.

She'd volunteered to put on her own underwear though. She may be sick but she wasn't a complete baby, Blair argued. Plus she was still kind of shy.

"Shy? Don't be. Blair, I'd be more than glad to do the honors."

She slapped him on the arm. "You're heinous."

"I know. But you love it too."

She just smiled at that.

Once she'd dressed up for bed, Chuck finally got off of her, shifted himself to the side and brought out the bowl that came along with the tray he brought in.

"Here." He said. "Eat this. It's good for you for now."

Her heart could've melted at the thoughtfulness of his actions.

She gazed up at him, wondering if he really was the Chuck she'd known all her life. Where was the guy that told her he didn't want her anymore? And who was this man she'd unexpectedly fallen in love with?

He stared back at her, wondering what she was thinking. She had that unreadable expression again and he just wished he could go into her mind just to find out whatever it was she…had in mind.

"Chuck…"

He interrupted. "No arguments. You're not going anywhere until you finish this."

Again, she instantly shut up and followed his orders, her heart beating steadily – based on her current state – at his actions.

He watched her silently eat her meal; glad she was following him without anymore queries.

She'd finished at last and he made her drink her medicine and lots of water. She obeyed him once again without any more argument. It kind of made him wonder even more what was going on in that little mind of hers as she remained silent, being so unusual it was scaring him, doing nothing but following everything he tossed at her.

When everything was done and through and they were both finally settled down in her bed, with her head lying on his chest and his arms wrapped tightly around her thin waist, he finally asked her,

"What's wrong?"

She looked up, wide doe-eyes giving him that mysterious, far away look that he just couldn't decipher. He was getting really worried. To top it all off, she just smiled and said,

"Nothing, Chuck. I'm just really sick. Thank you for being here though."

And then, his thoughts suddenly drifted to Dan and Serena in his own suite just last Saturday…

"_What's going on?" Dan asked._

_Serena shook her head. "Nothing. I'm fine…"_

And then…

"_Hey," Dan said gently, trying to comfort her. "I'm not mad, okay? I'm just so worried, I've been so worried about you…Please help me understand what's going on here…"_

_Again, she shook her head slowly. "Can we talk tomorrow? I'll call you…I'm sorry."_

Wasn't that conversation slowly nearing to what they were about to have now?

He didn't want to feel what Dan did. That was completely wrong on Serena's part. And he didn't want Blair to feel the need to do the same to him. He clearly knew there was something else she was hiding and he needed her to understand that she could trust him with anything.

"Blair…" She looked up once more, unreadable eyes, silent. "Something's wrong, I know. Please…you know you can tell me anything. You can trust me…"

Right at that moment, Blair just wanted to cry. How she just wanted to unload on him! How she just wanted to cry on his shoulder till tomorrow and let him comfort her in her dark situation! _God…_she just _wanted _to tell him, _anyone! _Because, really, how could she shoulder this heavy burden alone? She was scared and she didn't know what to do! She wanted to tell him so badly...

But she remained silent despite her angry cries within.

"Nothing's wrong, Chuck. I promise." She was lying, he knew.

She smiled though, trying so hard not to let the tears fall. She was afraid he'd see right through her. He couldn't know…She couldn't hurt him like that.

"Blair…_please…" Oh God, _he really was starting to act like Brooklyn boy now!

But she didn't say anything; instead she confused him even more by asking,

"Chuck, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"If I die tomorrow, or next week or after 3 months, or a year…" Who knew when right? "What would you do?"

His eyebrows furrowed. Why was she asking such a random question? Was she trying to distract him into not telling him her mysterious secret?

"Blair…" His tone carrying impatience. "What are you trying to pull now?"

She tugged on his sweater, as if holding on for dear life and then suddenly he realized that she was serious and she wasn't trying to play any games.

"Please just answer the question…"

Well what was the answer anyway? He didn't like thinking about questions like this simply because they weren't going to happen and if ever they did, he just didn't know exactly what he'd do. And that's exactly what he told her.

"I don't know, Blair. If you die, I don't know how I'd live. You're important to me, you know? Girlfriend or not. I'd be hard without you in this world…" Chuck proclaimed honestly.

Moments like these were very rare, very _un-_Chuck like, but he had to show that he could be honest with her and maybe, she could finally open herself up to him too.

Blair's eyes watered and she fought the tears back painfully. She gulped and didn't say anything, just thinking, deciding, and figuring out what to do next.

_If you die, I don't know how I'd live…_

She couldn't do that to him. She couldn't hurt him like that…She wanted forever, but she didn't want her to_ haunt_ him forever _like that_. _God…_This was so hard.

Chuck continued, pulling her closer to him and kissing her forehead lightly. "Anyway Blair, that's not going to happen, why are you asking stupid questions like that? You're not gonna die. I'll protect you."

She just smiled back bravely at him. "Aww…sweet. You'll protect me…Now, I feel so _safe!" _She exclaimed overdramatically.

He laughed and kissed her on the lips. And then his laugh died down, "Blair, I'm serious. I will protect you. And you can trust me, even if I've screwed up loads of times in the past. It's not going to be like that anymore, remember?"

She just nodded; drinking in his words, wanting to tell him it wasn't about not trusting him, that it had nothing to do with _him _but more to do with _her._

Eventually, she had tired out first. The day's events finally taking a toll on her. She had fallen on to a blissful sleep on him chest, thank goodness. With him by her side, she just felt so much better.

Chuck didn't sleep though. Instead, he watched her. Her angelic face was so beautiful, it took his breath away. _God, _no wonder she was nicknamed _Snow White…_

Georgina was definitely right about that part.

He couldn't ignore the feeling though that she had cut him off just like Serena did. Well not exactly how Serena did it with Dan. Blair – _much to his surprise – _had been far gentler with him tonight. Serena had been plain harsh at that time. What? Had they switched personalities now?

No wonder they were best friends.

They both had their own mysterious secrets that they didn't want anyone other than themselves to know. And they had to cut off their boyfriends just trying to hide...whatever the hell they were hiding.

Chuck, for one, was getting tired of the secrecy though. And if it were him, he'd shake it off out of Blair and Serena, whatever they were both individually hiding.

_Seriously._ What was up with these girls lately?

Chuck wouldn't give up though. He'd pry it out and figure it out, whatever it took. Well, not really, he couldn't go behind Blair's back again, he promised and she'd figure it out anyway and he'd be in deep shit then.

_Shit._

Everything just got a whole lot harder.

A part of him suddenly regretted making that promise. How was he supposed to figure it out then?

* * *

_To be continued..._

Okay there you go.

Can't wait for tonight.

OOh..I'm actually lazy to write author's notes this time around. Shocker anyone? haha.

Anyway R&R please. Thank you so much! :) Love you all. :D


	11. Chapter 11: All About My Rival

**A/R: (That's right, AR meaning ANRGRY RANTS!) Just a few SIDE COMMENTS about the FUCKING SEASON FINALE.**

1. WTF?! Let's start off with Dan and Serena. They're not my most favorite couple but GOD the entire SHOW WAS COMPLETELY CENTERED AROUND THEM SINCE THE BEGINNING. Right? I mean, we all knew it would be Dan and Serena, it was like right there in our faces. And then they just end it LIKE THAT because she "LIED" and he ran off to "SARAH". COME ON. It's been a FUCKING YEAR. They can get through anything. They've been through anything. HOW COULD THEY JUST...OHGOD. I feel sorry for Serena more than Dan because she's the one suffering more than he is. He never gave her any justice in the last two episodes, God damn him.

2. HEARTS LILY AND RUFUS FOR LIFE. It was so cute of them coming to terms the way they did. They're letting go, setting each other free, content with being friends, that's TRUE LOVE PEOPLE. Not what Dan and Serena have to offer. Gossip Girl was right. Let us now bear witness how they both will royally F- things up. There'll be more Lily and Rufus, I'm sure. They always make me smile and cry at the same time.

3. (apologies for swearing) FUCK YOU AMELIA! SKANK WHORE! DAMN YOU! AND DAMN YOU CHUCK BASS FOR BEING THE ABSOLUTE IDIOT YOU ARE! THAT'S GREAT! REALLY! AFTER ALL THE SHIT YOU WENT THROUGH FOR BLAIR (BECAUSE SHE F-ED YOU UP RIGHT AFTER YOUR LIMO SCENE) THEN THAT'S IT?! YOU'RE JUST GONNA LET GO?! OH FUCK YOU! ASS.

4. I changed my mind. Chuck is scared. It's fine. Let's forgive him. He'll realize a little too fucking late how fucking stupid he was for ditching Blair for that whore of an interior designer. HMM. LET'S SEE. OH. RIGHT. FUCK THE WRITERS FOR FUCKING US UP! WE WAITED MONTHS AND MONTHS FOR THEM AND THEY DO GIVE IT TO US ON THE VERY LAST EPISODE THEY HAVE, AND THINGS WERE GREAT UNTIL THEY FUCKING SCREWED IT UP!!

5. The couples now are so...GOD DAMN. How the hell am I going to pair people up in my stories when I want to bring the cast in? OH. OKAY. Let's have Dan and Serena take out their table knives and stab each other to death. Oh. Vanessa! You hate S right? Surely you'll join. Nate? Want some forks with that? Jenny? Eric? Oh for the fun of it, why don't you two join as well? You're fighting right? UGH. GOD.  
Serena and NAte? NO WAY. WHATEVER. You know, WHATEVER. WHAT-THE-FUCKING-EVER! They better make C/B happen, I dont fucking know how they'll unscrew what they've screwed but God damn they better make it happen.

I need to take a breath.

Enjoy the story.  
Be nice k? Please? HAHA. It's been a tough week. Thanks writers for screwing the hell of us over.

* * *

_Spotted: Jenny Humphrey waiting in the MET fountain fishing for change. Blair Waldorf seen dallying with an off-duty doorman at the Blarney's Stone on a Monday night._

So she had a time limit.

So she was having a few health problems.

So she was dying because of a heart-cancer-whatever.

So friggin what.

Dying or not, she was _not _going to give up this fight. No _friggin _way in hell. In fact, her impeding death gave her more backbone than ever in facing off with her mortal rival.

_Little J Humphrey. _

Screw the fact her heart was weak. It didn't matter. _Screw that little glitch in her life!_ Her mind was dead set in winning this battle, which meant so was her heart, which meant she was not going to forfeit this fight and hand in _her _throne to this little Brooklyn _trash _in designer clothes.

_Damn her for that ridiculous rumor!_

Blair thought furiously as she and her arch nemesis faced off on the top of the MET steps with their personal loyal handmaidens behind their backs, watching their every move, waiting for what would happen next.

Blair's blood was boiling. Who the hell did this skank bitch think she was? _If Chuck ever saw that rumor…_

Thank heavens Chuck was in Monaco for the bachelor party. She was safe. _For now. _

Jenny Humphrey didn't back down from Blair's cold and calculating stare. She stared back straight on, giving her the once over. She had power now. For real, this time around.

And even Blair Waldorf herself would find it hard to compete with her now that she had Asher by her side.

Blair, the starter of everything, was the first to sit down gracefully on the steps. At least that title won't be taken away from her anytime soon, she thought as they all motioned to follow her movements.

As soon as they all sat down, the girls began to check their phones to see what was the latest with Gossip Girl. Another set of proof-less rumors, Gossip Girl was ranting on now.

_Yes. _They wondered as well. _Who between who was sending all this stuff in? _

Blair wasn't minding her phone though. Instead, she mindlessly tossed a coin onto Jenny's lap.

"A nice shiny dime to add to your collection."

Jenny smiled unfazed. "Why the fruit cup, B? Lost your taste for yogurt? Wonder what Chuck would say about it."

_Bitch. _

And once again, Blair was tongue tied as Jenny's minions laughed along her.

And then her phone rang.

She looked at the caller ID.

_Shit._

After a moment's hesitation, she finally answered the call without saying hello. It didn't matter because he was the one to speak first.

"So I hear you've been… what's the word? Oh, right. '_Dallying with the off duty doorman?'_ Anything I need to know?"

Blair could barely contain the anger brewing inside of her. _Great. _Even _Chuck _heard.

And he was in _Monaco _right _now_. What? Was Gossip Girl going international now?

_Damn Jenny for that stupid rumor._

She gave Jenny a long death glare before she finally responded on the phone.

"Bonjour to you too, Chuck."

At the mention of his name, all eyes turned eagerly upon her. Well, if that'll take their attention off precious little Jenny, then _fine._ She was fine with that ridiculous rumor.

"You know if you missed me so much," Chuck now drawled on the line with that amused tone she was getting infuriated at the moment. "I'm just a phone call away. I'd be happy to excuse myself from the festivities and gladly indulge you in some…_phone sex, _perhaps? No need to dally with some milkman from downtown."

Blair's eyes widened, horrified at his playful suggestion. _Damn it. Damn it. DAMN IT! _

"Chuck." She spat on the phone. "Could you not be so heinous for at least five seconds, please? The rumor isn't true. You don't need to worry. And _no, _I'm not interested in _indulging _in some phone sex with you!"

She shouldn't have said that out loud, she realized too late as the girls shock-widened eyes were gazing at her with the utmost curiosity and excitement. Their delighted giggles filled her ears and burned her cheeks. _Shit!_ They were already grabbing their phones, ready to spill the latest dish between her and Chuck.

_Damn friggin it! _She thought frustratingly, blushing and turning tomato as she glanced upon Jenny and saw a bemused smile settling upon her lips.

"Wait." She thought out loud. "How did you even know? Are you still –"

"Sadly, no." Chuck interrupted, knowing already what her question was. "I do have a good internet connection though. It gets me by."

_Wait…what? _

Chuck was in Monaco for his father's bachelor's party. The meaning of that was plenty of parties, booze and hot French strip dancers were happening around and all Chuck could say was that _there was a good internet connection_ and that_ it was getting him by_?!

_What's happening to the world?_

She momentarily forgot her ongoing war with Jenny and completely let her guard down.

"Where are you now?" She asked.

"My hotel room." He answered.

She sighed. She really did feel bad he had to put on hold his usual habits for her. It was sweet of him to do so, of course. But she did always feel bad. He had proven himself to her time and time again. She trusted him again. So there was no problem really.

Bottom line is she just wanted him to go have some fun.

"Chuck," She breathed onto the phone. "Are you stalking me?"

That definitely quirked another raise of eyebrows from the girls.

Seriously, anything from the newest weird but sexy couple was _always _interesting. Their _love affair _was so unexpected and so out of character that it made things all the more juicier.

They were all silent now, leaning in just a little bit more onto the rising Queen, hoping to hear more, hoping they could also hear the other end of the line.

"What? No!" Chuck was now saying on the phone. He said it a little too quickly though. "I'm just checking up on you; see what you're up to." Blair sighed again.

"Okay look, I feel bad. This is not you, Chuck. It's a bachelor's party so go have some fun!" She encouraged, hoping she could say this to him in person. She really should've gone to say goodbye to him in the airport yesterday.

"Blair…"

"No. I trust you." She interrupted. "Go have some fun. Look, but don't touch or if you do, just _a little_." She put great emphasis on the word _little._ "You don't need to be stalking me, seeing how I am. Like you said, I'm just a phone call away remember?"

She smiled coyly to herself as she thought of her next words. "And besides, if you do get bored there, call me, and I might just very indulge you in a little phone sex."

Okay, now _that_ was definitely going to be sent to Gossip Girl! Blair Waldorf? Phone sex? With Chuck Bass? Chuck Bass? Not in a party-mood? For Blair Waldorf? Oh, how the world has changed these days!

_See?_ Very interesting stuff.

They said their last parting words and the girls gazed on, curious as to what brought that huge happy smile on Blair's face and then the call was done as soon as it began.

Jenny wasn't fazed though. She knew about the whole love affair going on between two but unlike the rest of the world, she wasn't liking it.

First of all, it was Chuck Bass they were talking about here. Really, no matter what, people like _Chuck Bass _don't change, especially for people like _Blair Waldorf_. Second of all, they were competition and she'd show the rest of the world that she and Asher were a far better couple than Blair and Chuck could ever be.

Thank God, he was in Monaco right now.

"Boyfriend calling to check up on you?" Jenny asked in that sickening sweet voice Blair hated.

She smirked at her rival. "Actually yes. Wonder where your boyfriend is though. Hope he hasn't found something else to amuse himself with."

Jenny wanted to rip her hair out. She really was one to talk. "Could say the same thing about you. Poor Chuck, wouldn't he be in a rage?"

"Excuse me, I'd never cheat on him."

"Fine, then maybe he would. He's Chuck Bass after all. A manwhore's a manwhore. Nothing like a scandal, right B? That's what you guys are made of right?" Jenny spat right back. And Blair just wanted to throw the fruit cup at Jenny's face. How dare she insult _Chuck _that way?

"Actually…" Hazel interjected slowly. Both girls turned to the new speaker. Hazel motioned to the rest of the girls, catching each other's eye and sharing a look.

"Chuck and Blair are pretty _hot_." Elise helped.

"He was really sweet to her with the whole SAT thing." Penelope added.

"Really smart too." Is continued.

"I think he's really in love with you, Blair." Nelly Yuki said from behind her.

_Whoa…_Ha! Beat that little J. But wait..._whoa..._

Who would've thought people would actually approve of her and Chuck? If she had known this would be the end result of her relationship with him, then she probably wouldn't have kept it a secret the first time around.

Inside Jenny was seething. She was losing this round fast. Chuck and Blair were so _not _hot. "Guys like _Chuck Bass _can't love. Don't be so naïve girls."

Hazel sighed dreamily. "You just weren't there, Little J. He was so different with Blair. And Blair totally let herself melt in front of him. It was the sweetest thing ever!"

"I still have tingles." Is said animatedly.

_Okay…_maybe the fandom was getting a little to overwhelming in Blair's point of view. _Seriously?!_ She was so calling back Chuck with this new information.

Penelope suddenly directed her attention to Blair and quirked her eyebrow. "Blair, you never really told us before. What made you keep going back to the Bad Boy Bass anyway?"

"Oh yes, _finally,_ spill it." Hazel encouraged, very, _very_ much interested.

"Yes, B." Jenny spat. "Tell us. How was Chuck in bed that you managed to create such a scandal around yourself?"

Blair held herself from rolling her eyes at her. Instead she now focused her attention to her clique, all waiting for her to spill the dish about her and Chuck.

How was she supposed to tell the story? Okay, so she was a bit tipsy that night at Victrola but she remembered every minute with her first time with Chuck. It wasn't like how she pictured it, but then again, now that she thought about it, she wouldn't have it any other way. She felt kind of wrong telling everybody how he was though. It wasn't something meant for everyone to know. At least,_ in detail._

Little did she know, a smile and blush were slowly grazing her delicate lips and the girls watched in fascination as their former Queen B completely transformed before them. Anything that had to do with Chuck completely changed their icy Queen.

She looked at them all and slowly shook her head, secret smile still in place, indicating she didn't want to share her sex life in detail.

"He was really good huh?"

"Made you feel really special?"

There was that faraway look in her eyes again as she smiled softly, remembering her first time with him. It didn't really hold much disgust to her as she once put out.

And along with a voice that sounded so foreign to her, she said softly, "Yes. Much as it sounds so surreal, he did make me feel special. He was so…so…"

"Gentle?"

"_Un-_Chuck." She finished.

And she left it at that. She wouldn't say anymore. She'd leave it to their imaginations.

Momentarily, Jenny stared enraptured as well at the sudden change of the girl she detested with all her heart. Even with Nate, Blair didn't have that kind of indescribable, momentary change. She briefly wondered if she could be that way with Asher too…

And she would, Jenny convinced herself. Blair and Chuck weren't the only love-dovey couple in the world. God, they were pathetic. Seriously, their relationship wouldn't last two months if she had any say in it.

Finally changing the subject, Blair asked. "So what are we doing tonight?"

"Asher's parent are out of town so, he and Jenny are throwing a party at his house." Penelope announced excitedly.

Blair wanted to roll her eyes. She didn't though. She just shoved the fruit in her mouth, wishing she could shove it up to Jenny's mouth instead and hoped she choked on it.

"It's a really small get together with just our _closest friends._" Jenny now said pointedly, indicating that _she, _Blair Waldorf, was not part of their circle of _closest friends. _

Blair smirked, wavering slightly. The war was back on, Chuck long forgotten. How dare this bitch not invite her!

"Sorry Blair," Jenny finished mockingly.

Nelly Yuki obviously feeling sorry for her new friend, who had been there for her through some rough times, offered. "Blair can take my place."

Jenny snapped back at the nerd. "Invitations are _non-transferable_. She's new to the group."

New? _New?! _Blair thought angrily. She _created _this group, for God's sake! _Non-transferable?! What was this? A bank? _And how dare she snap at Nelly Yuki, her new and trusted friend. _Ugh._

"Just because your name is on the invite doesn't make you a hostess." Blair glared at the blonde bitch.

Jenny's phone rang the moment she finished that sentence though. And Jenny looked up, triumphant and powerful once again.

"Oh. Then why is the party planner calling me?" And then she got up and made to take her call. "Excuse me, girls."

_The party planner's calling to tell you, you suck. _Blair thought immaturely. Well she had no comebacks so might as well right?

And then the girls started whispering again. B once again beat down by the Brooklyn trash. Suddenly she just wanted to talk about Chuck again or talk _to _him. It made everyone's attention focus on her, at least.

"Sorry, floral emergency." Jenny bounced back.

Blair rolled her eyes. _Joy. _

Jenny pointed to Penelope ecstatically. "Oh! And you'll be happy to know that the entire Unity lacrosse team, RSVP-ed!"

And that definitely got the attention of the excited girls.

A car pulled over on the sidewalk before them. And out came out the man of year, Asher Hornsby.

"Oh my God, it's Asher!" The girls all squealed. At least, the ones on the side of Jenny.

Nelly Yuki and Isabel were obviously sharing Blair's same thoughts of disgust at the sight of the newcomer. Really, what was so great about the guy anyway?

Chuck was _so_ much better.

But unfortunately, not here. In the country.

_Ugh. _Blair couldn't even stomach the sight of Jenny PDA-ing with her new _whatever _boyfriend. She and Chuck never usually PDA-ed like that and we're talking about Chuck Bass here people, the King of All the Sex and Whatnot.

"Since when did Jenny Humphrey become the next Brooke Aster?" Blair asked in disgust.

Is shook her head in disapproval. "The same way they all do…

"…marry up." Nelly Yuki finished.

_Great. _So she was losing this round fast. _Damn._

_Where was Chuck when she really, really needed him? _She could definitely use some PDA-ing right about now.

She shoved another fruit in her mouth and sighed, depressed and wondering how the hell she was going to beat Little J Humphrey's ass with all the glitz and glamour she was heading forward to know.

_Ugh. Thanks Bart. Perfect time for the bachelor party, really._

* * *

_Waldorf Penthouse – 10 hours later_

_Oh my Holy Mother of –_

Who would've thought her depression would lead up to such… _shocking _discoveries?

And the term _shocking_ was just the understatement of the year!

_Oh my goodness_, she really did _not_ expect this.

It was blowing up in her face all over again. Just exactly like that time during Ivy Week and the person blew the bomb on her face.

Same said person was blowing another bomb in her face.

She read everything again. Twice. Thrice. Ten thousand times. It was all the same. It was confirmed. It was…

_Shit. I have to tell Serena._

Blair reached for phone and speed-dialed her best friend. She picked up on the first ring.

"B, now's not a good time."

And didn't even bother saying hello or letting _her _speak first.

"It's important!" Blair practically shouted on the phone as she gazed on the screen of her laptop. _Shit. _

"Look, I know I told you I'd be more available but I just can't right now."

"But it can't wait!"

And then Serena hung up. Just like that.

_Damn it. _What the hell was wrong with the world today?!

She sighed. She couldn't do it. She couldn't use this against Jenny _and _Asher, the ultimate jerk of the year. She couldn't hurt _him_. Not again.

Screw this war. And Jenny. And her stupid party.

_Screw them all!_

Eric was more important than all of them combined.

Fine. If Serena wouldn't bother, then she'd just have to take things in her own hands.

God, she just had to do everything right?

_Oh screw it._

Then again, she was screwing off a lot of things lately.

* * *

_Asher's Mansion – 2 hours later _

"Where's the host? I have something for him."

Blair Waldorf, dressed impeccably for the occasion, didn't bother waiting for her friends to answer her. She stomped her way through the party _– with grace, of course -, _looking for the guy she was going to kick ass tonight_. _

_Oh look, just the jackass she was looking for._

He was with his "guys", animatedly talking about God knows what. His back was turned away from her and she took this opportunity to catch his attention by slapping his cell phone on his shoulder blade. _Hard._

"We need to talk." She said simply as she twirled his cell phone in her delicate hand. He got the message and sent his cronies away.

"Thought you might want this back." Blair snapped as she showed his phone to him.

"Whatever you _found… _It's not what it looks like." Asher said defensively. He wasn't going to be brought down by this slut.

"It's always what it looks like. And judging by the texts and photos, looks like a little more than friendship." Blair fired back. No way was he buying her off with some petty excuse. Damn him.

"What are you gonna do with them?" Asher challenged.

Unbeknownst to her, said subject of conversation was making his way through the crowd as he heard Blair defend his honor.

"Well, lucky for you, your _friend…" _She emphasized the term. "…is someone I actually care about. Or I would've used them against you and Jenny already." Lucky ass. But she wasn't done yet. "Too bad you don't care about him the same way…"

And again, she was surprised as subject of conversation popped out of nowhere.

"It's okay, Blair. I can handle this." Eric said as he now stood beside her.

Asher's jaw clenched in anger…and _fear, _perhaps? "What's _he_ doing here?"

At the same time, Jenny stormed in, furious, with her girls. "What is _she_ doing here?"

By now, everyone's attention was turned to the ongoing commotion happening between the hosts and the party crashers.

"Are you going to tell her or am I?" Eric now said to Asher, not backing down. Blair was amazed at his show of backbone. If he did falter though, she'd be right there to pick up the pieces, just enough to get him to compose himself. That was the plan Blair was forming now.

"There's nothing to tell!" Asher exclaimed, still denying what a lot of people were about to know in a matter of minutes.

Eric ignored the jackass and pointedly looked at Jenny. "Gossip Girl was right. Asher was kissing someone this morning…_Me." _

Gasps could be heard all over. Flashes of cameras were now starting to flick. Cell phones were quickly being brought out.

"He's totally lying. Tell him Jenny." Asher gritted out. "I was with you all morning."

"Yeah, Asher's right." Jenny announced the lie, unblinking. "I was with him. Eric's lying."

Blair just shook her head in disbelief. _Un-friggin-believable. _

Eric raged out furious, disbelieving that his own friend since the beginning would humiliate him the way she just did. "Why would I stand here in front of everyone we know and tell them, if it wasn't true?"

Jenny just stared back, unfazed and cold. Asher just smirked, thinking he was triumphant.

"I'm gay." Eric announced. _Strong, proud, unafraid,_ Blair was so proud of him for words. "And so are you."

Asher yelled out, enraged as well. "Get this _faggot _out here!"

And thank God, Blair stood beside him in the face of his public humiliation, ready to the defend him with the greatest weapon she held in her small hand. It only took his word for her to use it.

For once, he didn't care about the welfare of the people that stood before him now. Serena was right. Only the ones that really cared about him would stand by him. And these people before him definitely weren't one of those people who would.

His decision was quick, final, and _brutal. _

"Go ahead and do it." He permitted Blair and then walked away from the crowd. He didn't want to see the two people who just betrayed him fall.

Who was Blair to disobey orders?

She opened Asher's phone, pressed a few buttons and then YES, sending all of his messages to Gossip Girl.

"What did you just do?" Asher asked, extremely alarmed now and grabbed his phone out her hands.

"You'll see."

Jenny was finished. And she deserved it. She deserved it the moment she betrayed Eric in the face of the public.

Even she would never have the heart to do what Jenny just did, Ice Queen Bitch Blair was. Eric was innocent. And he had never harmed a single hair on Jenny's head.

She gave Jenny one last look of disapproval before she turned and walked away, quickly making a follow after Eric.

* * *

"Eric, wait up."

He was on the edge of walking down the stairs when he heard his name. He turned and was face to face with Blair Waldorf, his savior for tonight.

"Thanks for that." He said simply.

"No problem. I'll walk you home? We could pig out on the way and talk about happy things." She winked at him. "Just like old times."

Eric smiled, grateful for the offer. "Sure."

Just then, the girls of her old clique had made their way to them.

"Someone needs a semester in France." Blair thought out loud. Eric gave her a weird look. She shrugged, "Guess you had to be there."

"Get your things girls, we're leaving." Penelope said to them.

Jenny tried to stop them. "Wait guys, we could still have fun, don't leave."

Hazel rolled her eyes and shook her head. "It's kind of hard to party after the gay bomb drops."

Penelope spoke up, "I'm going to do something out of character and give you the benefit of the doubt. Tell us Gossip Girl is wrong."

Hazel interjected, seeing where her friend was going. "Did you or did you not sleep with Asher?"

Eric's eyebrows raised at that.

"I may have exaggerated a little bit." Jenny murmured.

Penelope scoffed in disbelief. "Dating a gay guy is an honest mistake, but lying to your girlfriends about sex is _unforgivable_."

Jenny turned away in shame.

"To think I almost asked you to wear a matching dress." Is exclaimed.

Nelly Yuki spoke up too, "You're branded now with the L word."

"_Liar." _Elise hissed.

_T for traitor too…_Eric silently added.

Hazel then turned to Blair, dropping Jenny of their lives forever. "So what are we doing tonight?"

Blair had that little date with Eric, no way was she backing out on him now.

"We are doing nothing. I, however, am heading out with Eric and going home." They looked onto her, slightly annoyed she'd turn their backs on them for some gay guy. She added though, "But tomorrow, dinner at the Waverly and 151 for drinks?"

They all nodded eagerly. Blair was officially the new Queen now. No question.

"I'll have Dorota blackberry everybody an itinerary." She gave Jenny another once over and shook her head, disapproval and anger clear in her eyes. "You mess with me, fine. You spread rumors about me, fine. You make Chuck worry about me, fine. But you _don't _mess with the people I care about. You _don't_ humiliate them in front of everybody. And you _don't_ insult them. Stay away from Eric."

With that, she turned onto Eric, her venom immediately melting as she faced him. She gave him a soft smile before she said,

"Come on, let's get out of here."

Jenny watched as they both left, feeling nothing but shame, regret and emptiness filling her entire being.

_God, what had she just done?_

* * *

"You okay?"

She and Eric were now munching on their hot buns with coffees on the other hand as they slowly walked back to the Palace Hotel.

When Serena had left for boarding school, it had been just the two of them. Back then, they'd have many nights like this, pigging out, talking and just simply bonding with each other. They had gotten closer during Serena's disappearance and even if things weren't the same now as they were back then, their friendship was still as strong as ever.

They'd always depend on each other during times like this. They did have a lot in common after all, more so than what other people would normally think.

"Yeah." Eric finally answered as he swallowed his bun. "Thanks, Blair. For tonight."

"Anything for you, E."

He flinched at the nickname, remembering the terrible events that happened merely hours ago. Blair noticed his demeanor and silently waited for him to tell her what was wrong. That was Blair, she never asked him, she just waited. Most of the time, he was grateful for that.

He took a sip from his sweet coffee before he replied, "Georgina had dinner with us earlier. She ratted me out to my family. Shocked everyone. Mom was…" He sighed. He knew that was the usual reaction of people, he just didn't think it would hurt that much.

Blair rubbed his back to comfort him, feeling his pain. "I'm sorry, Eric. You should try to just understand her. I don't think Lily was ready to know it just yet."

_Georgina_. _How did she always manage to input herself in everybody's lives these days?_

"I know. I wasn't ready too."

"But you're stronger than she is now. You need to let her know that you understand her reaction even if it hurts."

Eric just nodded, taking her words in. He smiled and looked up to her, the only other person he ever considered as a sister. "Thanks, Blair, really."

"Hey, stop." She smiled. "I'm proud of you, you know that? You were so brave tonight. Almost didn't need me."

Eric laughed out loud and took another bite at his hot bun. "This is really good, you know? I really missed this."

"Yeah, yeah, everybody misses me. I get it." She playfully joked.

"Chuck called, didn't he?"

This time Blair laughed out loud and said sarcastically, "I think he's having the time of his life there."

It was a joke but Eric decided it was time to get a little serious. "Nah, I think he has the time of his life when he's here…_with you_."

Something flashed in her eyes and Eric wondered what it was. But it was gone as soon as it came.

She smiled tightly and said nothing else as she finished on her bun and took another sip from her warm coffee.

"Eric," She finally spoke, quietly. "What if one day I died? Like before all of you? What do you think would happen?"

Immediately Eric stopped his tracks and turned to her, alarmed. "Blair, are you - ?"

"No!" She exclaimed a little too quickly. "No, sweetie. I was just wondering…"

Eric didn't buy it. "Blair, you don't need to do this to yourself. You're beautiful the way you are right now. Trust me. And Chuck loves you. He doesn't say it but there's that look in his eyes, you know? It's different with you."

"Eric…I…"

"No, Blair. Look, if I can get over it, you can too. We were both in this together before remember? It's time we get out of it. Just think of Chuck next time you feel like doing _that _again." Eric said, hoping his words would convince her to cease her actions.

"If you died, this world wouldn't revolve the same again. We'd all be lost, most especially Chuck. Don't think he could handle that kind of pain, Blair. Don't do this to him."

She sighed deeply. She wished she could tell him. She wished she could tell her dear friend that yeah, she didn't want to die but apparently her body didn't agree with her mind's desire.

But instead she said, "You're right. I really need to get over this. Thanks, Eric."

"Anything for you." He smiled charmingly, repeating her earlier words.

"You know if you weren't gay, some girl would actually be charmed by you already." Blair commented.

"Yeah well I am. That girl will just have to deal."

"Poor girl. Really doing the female population a bad favor. We need more sweet, nice guys like you." And she delicately stroked his blonde hair.

"Yeah, well…"

They soon had made it to the Palace and they bid their goodbyes.

"This is me. Again, Blair. Thanks for tonight. You're always there for me in times like this."

"Yeah, well…" She shrugged, as if used to joining friends in their public humiliation. "I'll keep in mind what you said earlier." Blair smiled.

"You do that." And he slowly walked off, a grateful smile plastered on his lips. She waved back goodbye and waited till he made his way inside the hotel's doors before she turned and hailed a cab, heading home.

She was extremely tired.

_What a day. _

She thought about it. Being tired was just a normal experience right? Especially after the day she's had…

_Oh crap. _

She didn't even know if this was good tired or bad tired anymore.

* * *

_Waldorf Penthouse – 40 min later_

She didn't head onto her bedroom to change and rest.

Instead, she lounged on her couch, laptop in front, reveling in her triumph as she scrolled down Gossip Girl's page, Jenny Humphrey's disgraceful face plastered all over the net.

_Victory was sweet._

Blair sighed. Jenny Humphrey got what she deserved. Besides, she shouldn't feel so bad anyway. She wasn't the one slowly dying between the two of them.

This could've been her last hurrah before she took off…

_And okay, stop with the morbid thoughts Waldorf. This is a happy moment for you._

Yeah. Right. A happy moment for her these days would be wrapped in Chuck's strong arms.

Her elevator doors dinged, signaling a visitor and she looked up and wondered who would drop by at such a late hour.

And out came Little J Humphrey herself, striding to her, catching her off-guard for a moment.

_Guess the night wasn't over then. _

She gave her a playful smile. "My, my, if it isn't Little J risen from the ashes."

"I came to tell you in person," Jenny began, stripped of all her make-up and all her lies. "_You win."_

Yeah, like she didn't know that.

She laughed as if the game was still on. "Oh! Sweet, we just started to play!"

Jenny shook her head, "No, you don't understand. I'm _done. _With you, with them, with all of it."

"Just like that? You wave the white flag?" _Really? Little J? Completely giving up? Where was the bitch she knew?_

"I lied. And I stole. And I lost the respect of my family." Barely holding her tears as she listed her own sins. "For what? So I could be like _you?" _She spat out. She took a deep breath before she calmed down, "You asked me before if it was all worth it." She shook her head. "My answer is it's not."

With that, Jenny Humphrey turned to walk away from Blair Waldorf, turned to walk away from the lifestyle she wished to be in…_forever. _

She wasn't going to look back.

Blair shook her head behind her. So finally Jenny Humphrey realized that this life wasn't at all worth it. Never thought she'd see the day. What was a girl like Jenny Humphrey, Brooklyn girl, who had a family caring about her 24/7, know what really happens behind closed doors in a luxurious mansion?

She had no idea whatsoever. And whatever she was going through now was _nothing _compared to what they've all been through.

"I tried to warn you." Blair's voice echoed through her penthouse, stopping Jenny in her tracks.

"There's a price to pay." She continued, finally making Jenny turn back to her. "There's_ always_ a price to pay."

She smiled briefly, not finding any joy in their conversation. "How's a girl like you to afford it?"

"Well, you were right." Jenny responded, admittance to her own self.

"Well, you were put up a good fight." She sighed and smiled genuinely, letting her know it was a sincere compliment. Before she added, "For a freshman."

"Thanks."

Blair continued softly, "You're not like us, Little J, in more ways than you think. You think it's easy? It's _not._ Even _I, _the girl you don't want to become, have a price to pay, _far _greater than yours could ever be."

Jenny raised her eyebrows and scoffed. "Really? And what's that? You're rich. And you have everything you want. You have friends who don't really care about you and friends who do. You made the jackass of the Upper East Side fall in love with you and now," She rolled her eyes and smiled briefly, "He's ready to do whatever he can for _you._ So really? What's the price _you _have to pay, Blair? Because from where I stand you're the luckiest girl I know, the bitchiest but still the luckiest."

Blair simply gave her a small, mysterious smile, one that she had never seen before.

Jenny had no idea. Nobody did.

_Because dying made her the luckiest girl in the world, right?_

She wasn't thinking about anything else, she just knew that tears were beginning to blur her eyes and she let thoughts of her impeding death completely fill her mind. She had been avoiding it for the past week, thinking life was just normal and she wasn't really that ill. That's what she was good at anyway. Being in denial. Pretending. Making bad things in her life non-existent.

Her war with Jenny had kept her busy, kept her going on as Blair Waldorf, the one that wasn't sick and dying.

But now Jenny was forfeiting, stripping herself of everything she once knew and Blair knew the moment Jenny waved her white flag, she would once again succumb to the pain of knowing she would leave all of those she cared behind when she didn't even want to anymore.

"I'm dying."

Jenny's head completely snapped back to her. _What the hell?_

_What?!_

What game was Blair playing now?! That wasn't something to mess around with.

"Blair, enough games." She scolded harshly.

Blair looked up at her, wide doe-eyes brimming with tears, eyes filled with so much sadness and so much pain and _oh my God…_maybe Jenny was wrong about her. So, so wrong. She shook her head, wishing she had never heard anything.

_No. No. It wasn't true. It's just a game. It's always a game with Blair Waldorf._

"I'm not playing anymore." Blair stated. Without even her realizing it, her tears finally poured down her beautiful eyes.

"I'm dying, Little J. _Me._ Blair Waldorf is dying."

And Jenny was openly crying now too, slowly inching her way back to the one she swore she was done with.

"It's a heart condition." Jenny continued to shake her head as her tears fell too. "They told me my last chance was to get a heart transplant, but I can't even have that because my bulimia caused too much problems so my body can't handle a big operation like that."

For the first time in her life, Blair Waldorf was sobbing before her, stripped of everything as well; all her bitchiness and defenses were gone, replaced by something foreign Jenny couldn't even begin to comprehend with.

What struck Jenny most was that Blair wasn't lying anymore and that Jenny wished she just was because that was even better than _this, _the _truth. _

_And then..._

She felt it.

Maybe it had been such a tiring day, or maybe her emotional stress was completely taking a toll over her, but Blair felt it, nonetheless.

It started like a small poke in her chest, but she knew better. It would only take seconds before the pain started to worsen. Her heart constricted in her chest and she clutched her chest in pain, hoping it would stop but knowing it wouldn't.

Jenny's eyes widened at the sight before her and alarm bells started ringing in her head.

_Oh my God…_

She started to panic as Blair dropped down from the edge of her couch and on the marble floor, Jenny slid to her side immediately, dropping her bag and trying to think of what do.

"_Oh my God. Oh my God." _She was shaking as she held Blair. _"Oh my God! What do I do?! Oh my God! BLAIR! What's happening to you?!" _

Blair wasn't responding, only writhing in terrible pain and crying, and Jenny saw her breathing begin to hitch. _Shit! Oh God..._

"_Oh my God." _Jenny kept repeating. With shaking hands, she grabbed her cell phone in her bag and quickly dialed 911.

"Yeah! 911? I have an emergency! Help please. My friend, she's…" Jenny kept stuttering, shaking, _oh my God! _She couldn't form words out. "Her heart…she, heart condition…it's… I don't know what to do! Please just come!"

She quickly spat out the address, jammed her phone her pocket and helped Blair up.

Blair just screamed in pain. "Damn it, Blair! You are _not _dying on me, okay? Damn it! Get the hell up!"

She couldn't, not completely so Jenny had to practically drag her to her elevator doors and make their way down to the ground floor and wait for the ambulances to come.

Jenny prayed feverishly that Blair's pain would stop.

It didn't. It just kept getting worse.

_Oh my God. _She kept saying that out loud. What was taking those stupid ambulances so damn long?!

"Okay, I'm sorry okay?! I said you won already! Damn it. Stop it! Stop scaring me! Stop it!" Jenny pleaded, crying and scared, _shaking_.

But Blair couldn't respond anymore, and Jenny's eyes widened as Blair began to pale, her writhing began to cease and her eyes started drooping.

"No! _Oh my God! No! Stay awake! God! Oh my God!" _

She heard the sirens and looked up, a small sense of relief crashing through every part of her.

They pulled over to them, did whatever they had to do with Blair's almost frail form and everything was just happening so quickly, Little J couldn't even blink.

She had to make a decision _now. A_nd fast.

_God damn it. _She had said she was done with Blair Waldorf less than 10 minutes ago! But God damn it. She couldn't just leave her like that. Jenny had a heart after all despite what people thought about her. Blair apparently was going to lose hers. _Oh God…_

She thought about her family, waiting for her, disapproval written their faces. They'd never look at her the same way again…

_Oh my God…_

The moment she climbed onto the ambulance with the nurses and their medical stuff and Blair's failing body, she had tossed aside all possibilities of her family ever look at her like they once had.

She was only 14 years old for Christ's sake. And here she was trying to save the life of the person she hated with all her being.

_Damn it._

They'd understand. Someday. Soon.

This was a life and death situation anyway.

* * *

_to be continued..._

Reason: Because I'm sick of seeing Jenny being the obnoxious bitch that she is. She wants to get better? Fine. Prove it. Help Blair damnit. Plus I need Jenny. To do something...later on...iono bitch around someone else or something... :p

Okay, I'm done writing parts of the show. Next few chapters shall be my own until I can finally input the last two episodes. FUCK THE FINALE for SCREWING MY STORYLINE. FINE, GUESS I'LL HAVE TO TWIST THAT TOO.

I shall be making a new story. Starting from the finale. BECAUSE I'M NOT HAPPY. AND I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER ABOUT. DAMN IT CHUCK!

P.S. Any One Tree Hill fans out there? Anyho, just wanted to say, OMG the season finale was AWESOME. INCREDIBLE. SHIT. I AM WASHED IN TEARS AND SCREAMS. DAMN THAT MAJOR CLIFFHANGER! I FEEL TINGLES AND EVERYTHING. OMG! LUCAS HOW DARE YOU?! AHHH!! WHO ARE YOU GOING TO MARRY?! PEYTON! PLEASE PEYTON! (okay, I'm not really a fan of Lucas and Peyton, but they're right for each other. Plus Peyton's suffered enough. Like the entire season she's been so fucking sad. I mean come on! Peyton over Lindsey ANYDAY. And ugh, hate Lindsey forever.) Brooke is better off single. But I love seeing loads of Brooke and Lucas together. Oh God. AAHH. My heart is SOARING!! Dan...OMG. I was crying...He's really trying you know? And then THAT HAPPENS. I cried. AHHH. ONE TREE HILL ROCKS. God. Beautiful. As usual. OTH, my first love, you never let me down.

See? This is why I prefer Mark Schwan (is that right spelling?) over Josh Swartz! After he royally f-ed things up in the OC and now GOSSIP GIRL. God. Somebody grill his ass. I knew this would happen. SHIT.

Anyway watch out for my next chapter and story. Will be updating soon, I promise. :)


	12. Chapter 12: The Morning After

**A/N: WOW! Once again, I must thank you all for the reviews, for putting me and my stories on your alerts…really I'm so overwhelmed. Every single time you'll make your comments, I'm so wowed. Really, you all make me cry and laugh and everything. Aww...Thank you mucho for all the support! I'm so, so happy everyone's liked what's happening so far. AAH. Thank you! MWAHs to all of you wonderful people.**

Regarding last chapter (All About My Rival), everyone's reviews really shocked me to death (HAHA, no it wasn't because we all shared the same views about that stupid season finale) but how you all approved of the whole Jenny thing.

I was kind of hesitant about it, coz as far as I know, not a lot of people are fans of the bitch (including me so…) I just thought I really needed her for something that involves this chapter… :p

ALSO, PEOPLE: I'M NOT GOING TO _JUST_ KILL BLAIR OFF OKAY?! Hahaha! I mean not like RIGHT NOW, IN THIS CHAPTER, LET'S KILL THE QUEEN B. HAHAHA. I mean CHUCK NEEDS TO KNOW FIRST. Which he won't because I WANT to make him SUFFER. Take_ THAT _ASS, FOR SCREWING WITH HER IN THE SEASON FINALE. GOD, I'm still so bitter about it. HAHA. OH MY GOD. And I found an fucking ARTICLE that made me all the more bitter about it. FUCKING WRITERS (i posted it down below so y'all could see.)

And plus if that was so, then this story would end and then it's all boo-hoo.

I want to try other stuff too. Haha. So there, _that_'s cleared up. :D

Anyway so here's what's next.

Enjoy.  
Tee-hee. :D

* * *

Jenny Humphrey was currently experiencing chills right about now.

She was trembling, scared, tired, hungry, frustrated, confused…

_Did she mention scared?_

Because yeah, being stuck in the hospital alone in the middle of the night with your arch enemy possibly _dying_ in the next room where the nurses hurriedly dragged her in, was Jenny's idea of one _heck_ of a night out.

_God…what the hell was happening?_

She had stopped crying almost an hour ago. Her tears wouldn't do anything to solve the problem that was Blair and crying would just tire her out more.

She just sat there. _Frigid. Cold. Shaking._

She didn't know how long she had been there alone, in that white walled, white floored, white everything hallway; merely trembling as she would either sit waiting, or pace around furiously when she got tired of the sitting.

She hated this place.

And she hated Blair Waldorf for unintentionally bringing her to this horrifying place.

But she stayed.

She didn't know why. She _had_ to.

Because she didn't know what else to do.

_God, _she was only 14 years old! She wasn't an expert in things like this! She never even thought she'd ever experience something as traumatizing as this, let alone _actually _going through it.

Had she been such a horrible person lately that this was the ultimate punishment she got?

_But then again… she wasn't the one being operated or whatever in some room just a little beyond her…_

_Shit._

Blair's going to be fine. She kept telling herself. Come on! It's _Blair_. Blair Waldorf. The bitch of all the bitches, the strongest, fiercest, coldest bitch of the Upper East Side! _Nothing_ could bring her down.

But _something_ was. Something so terrible, so cruel that no one, especially _not_ mere Little Jenny Humphrey could do anything about it.

_Except wait..._

_God damn it. _How long has it been? What the _hell _were they doing to Blair?!

Earlier, she had been thinking of calling up Chuck Bass.

But then she remembered that he was currently not in the country until…_she had no idea when. _And plus, she wasn't really up to talking to the guy who almost raped her at her first party ever, despite the fact that he was some sort _reformed _guy now, thanks to girl being operated away in some room somewhere in this hospital.

He was still Chuck Bass.

And if he was different with Blair, well, he wouldn't exactly be _different_ with others.

Besides what would she say anyway?

_Uhm…hey, it's me. Jenny? Little J? The girl you tried to take advantage of at the Kiss on the Lips party, remember? Oh. But I'm not calling because of that. I'm calling because your girlfriend, my evil arch nemesis, who I have been currently waging war with lately, is currently dying and I have no idea what to do except call you. No swear, this isn't just some ploy to get to you. So yeah, please come. Btw, how was Monaco? _

Yeah, that'll go _so _well without a laugh on his side of town.

She did however try to call Serena, the best friend, the warrior princess.

Unfortunately, warrior princess had decided tonight of all nights not to answer her phone. And Jenny didn't feel right leaving a voice mail. She had a feeling Serena wouldn't get it anyway.

She didn't feel right calling Nate or Eric or even _Dan _about this little situation she was in. What could they do anyway? Plus she didn't think they were in the mood to be talking to someone like her at the moment.

She sighed.

She was so…

_God, what the hell was taking so damn long?!_

She really had no other choice.

She decided to call the one other person she could actually depend on something like this. Not that he had ever gone through something like this before, but he was probably mature enough to know exactly what to do next.

And so, with trembling fingers and a slight hesitation, she pressed the number she had been eyeing on for quite awhile now and let it go on to speed dial.

"Hey, dad." She spoke after several rings. "I know it's late and I know you hate me. But that's not important right now…"

She shut her eyes and leaned against the cold wall, holding back her tears and trying not to choke on her next words.

"I need your help."

* * *

It is always amazing how the sun could still continue to rise up high in the sky despite the gloomy cloud looming on their heads.

Father and daughter sat side by side in complete silence, caught in their own thoughts as they now sat by Blair's side, waiting for her to open her beautiful eyes.

_You'd think they were her family members. _

She was completely alright now, they had stabilized her, gave her some medications, did whatever mambo-jumbo they did to make her all better for the next day and now they simply waited for her to wake up.

Father and daughter slightly envied the sleeping beauty before them. While she lay resting in peace, they, however did not get much sleep the night before.

"Will she be okay?"

Rufus slightly turned to his daughter's murmur. He sighed and focused his attention on the fragile girl before him. _Who would've thought?_

He tried to smile in attempt for comfort. It didn't work. He sighed, instead. "Yeah, doctors says she's fine_...for now."_

Another painful thirty minutes filled with nothing but silence passed by them before Blair finally decided to awaken.

Both their hearts leapt in relief as they watched in fascination as her eyes began to flutter.

_Thank God._

"Where am I?" Blair slurred. This clearly wasn't her room.

Rufus gently took her hand in his own, as if trying to comfort her. "You're in the hospital. Jenny brought you in last night when you had an attack."

Blair slowly turned to the man who spoke to her now, as if not recognizing him, then glanced down on the warm hand on hers. She didn't realize how cold she was.

And then like a lightning bolt, realization dawned upon her as his words finally registered in her brain.

Her eyes widened slightly, whether out of fear or surprise, Rufus could not tell. He assumed a little of both.

Blair's eyes swiftly turned away from him and onto his young daughter seated beside him.

"I can't believe you told him."

_You've got to be kidding me._

Jenny's eyes widened at the accusation. It wasn't said in its usual bitchy tone, but it was an accusation nonetheless. To say she was shocked was beyond an understatement. But then again, this was Blair Waldorf, not just some mere normal person she knew from somewhere.

Jenny scoffed, annoyed. "Well what was I supposed to do? Call your boyfriend? Your best friend?" She then thought about what she was saying. "Okay…maybe that would've been a better option than my father..." She relented. "I did try calling Serena but she wasn't answering and – "

"WHAT?!" Blair was fully awake now, bolting upright, completely holding tightly onto Rufus' hand, without even her realizing it. Rufus let her hold on. He just stared amazed that such a small, fragile girl could have so much strength considering her situation at the moment.

"What?" Jenny asked back, confused. You know, during times like this, a simple _thank you _would do. But this was Blair Waldorf she was talking to. Dying or not, she wouldn't…_ugh. _"What else was I supposed to do?!"

"_Don't tell them." _Blair whispered now, pleadingly. She shut her eyes, controlling her tears. She would not cry before these strangers. "_Don't tell anyone." _

Too many people knew already.

_Uhm…yeah, coz Jenny and Rufus, that's A LOT of people right?_

But Jenny was…She liked to tell people stuff. Like with the whole Nate thing. _God… _What had Blair been thinking? Telling _Jenny _of all people her deepest darkest secret…

_Right. She hadn't been thinking…_ She should've just signed her own death wish while she was at it.

"Blair," Rufus now spoke, comforting, gentle. Suddenly, she wished her own father was here with her. "We have to tell. They deserve to know."

Blair suddenly opened her eyes, taking both his huge hands in her small ones and shaking her head fervently, forgetting about controlling her tears and letting them fall with her realizing it.

"_No. No. No. No!" _She repeated over and over again, unable to contain everything she was feeling anymore. "_You don't understand. They can't know…They can never know… No one has to know…Please… Promise me…"_

She knew this man was directly linked to Lily Vander Woodsen, and he would not make any hesitation confiding in his first love. And if he did that, Lily would tell Serena, her best friend, her sister. Things would get out of hand...and she just couldn't let that happen.

"Why?" Rufus pleaded back, trying to understand this girl's desire to keep such an enormous thing quiet. "Why don't you want them to know?"

Jenny watched as Blair Waldorf brokenly and openly wept before her father, the sight doing no pleasure to her own heart.

It was like a stab in her own heart when Blair finally whispered,

"I don't want to hurt them."

And Rufus Humphrey doubled over. Wasn't this the Ice Queen horrible girl that kept on trampling on his daughter and causing so much trouble? Apparently, she had a lot of sides to her that he was sure, most people didn't even know existed.

"Blair," He tried again. "You need someone to help you in this. Your parents, maybe…"

And Blair went hysterical again, shaking and trembling and sobbing. "I don't have parents!" Blair yelled back. "I have all the help I need! I do! I have! You! And Jenny! That's enough..."

"Really? And what if your condition worsens? How do you intend to keep that a secret? How do you intend for _us _to keep it a secret?"

"I'll take care of it."

Jenny knew that tone. Blair was going to do something. And Jenny already had a feeling what that something was.

"_Please…" _Blair pleaded. "_Please…They'll be so hurt…_ I don't want them to go through this pain. They mean _so much _to me… I can't hurt them _anymore…_They have enough worries already… I don't want to be a burden… I don't want them to look at me the way you do now…"

"And how do I look at you now?" Rufus asked.

"Pity. You pity me. Coz I'm going to die."

And before Rufus could even protest, she continued,

"Sadness. You feel sad for me. A life shouldn't be taken at such a delicate age, right?"

That shut him up.

"I don't want Serena or anyone I care about feel that kind of sadness you're feeling. It's a different level for them because I know I mean something to them…I can't let them suffer like that _for me…_It's _too much…"_

And Rufus sat, stunned, amazed and wondering, how the hell could she think of other people when she was caught up in such a huge tangle of her own?

Rufus had to make a choice. _Now._

_Damn it_. And he wasn't even her parent. How in the world had he got dragged into something that was so far off from his own realm?

_But…_

He sighed, still feeling the pressure of her small, shaking hands tightly clenched to his own.

"_Okay…"_

Jenny suddenly stood up, alarmed. "What?!" She was shocked he'd even agree to it. Her father would never… was never… "_'OKAY_'?! What do you mean _'OKAY'_?!" _What was happening to this world?_

"Jenny. We have to promise. This is Blair's decision. Her problem. We were just unfortunate enough to know it. If she wants to keep it quiet _for now,_" He gave Blair a pointed look. "Then we'll keep it quiet."

Relief was visibly shown in her pale features. "_Thank you, Mr. Humphrey. _Thank you."

"But…" Rufus added sternly. "If your condition worsens beyond _our_ control, we're going to have to tell someone. Your parents, at least."

Blair just nodded in agreement, simply grateful that they had agreed in making their little pact.

Rufus stood up, a new look of determination in his eyes. "Conditions." He announced. Blair just gave him a WTF look. Jenny rolled her eyes, so very used to this kind of conversation.

And then Rufus began his long list of demands, starting with Blair. "I get your house number, your cell phone number, your home address, everything that could be used for emergencies, including your parents' and friends' numbers. This entails me to check up on you whenever I wish," He gave a pointed look at Blair. "And no, don't even try lying to me about wherever you are because I'll figure it out sooner or later." Which earned another raise of eyebrows from Blair and Jenny turning away in guilt.

Rufus was slowly pacing now, chin held up, completely dignified and determined about what he was saying. "Since you're in a delicate position now, you need a _curfew." _Blair's eyes could've popped out right then and there. "Also, you're going to be needing to take your medications, eat on time, cut down on the drinks, lessen the partying and staying out at night, and I'll be in charge of making sure you do so and – "

Blair slowly raised her hand as if she were answering a strict teacher's question in a class. Rufus stopped and turned to her, giving her permission to speak.

"What, uhm, are you like my parent or something?"

Leave it to Blair Waldorf to interrupt a classic Rufus Humphrey demands list and ask the most stunning question ever heard by mankind.

Rufus, had enough backbone to recover quickly though. "Apparently, _yes._" He challenged back. "Since yours are not around. Plus you're the one who dragged me in this, so…"

"Actually," Blair interrupted again. "_She _dragged you in this," She clarified, pointing at Jenny behind his back. Jenny scowled back in response. "I was in a total state of unconsciousness when all this happened."

Rufus just nodded his head, unfazed. "Okay, so what's it gonna be? I tell your parents and friends about you or are you going to follow all my simple rules?"

Blair gulped. Okay, so maybe this guy wasn't such a dumb ass after all.

"Fine." She finally forced out.

"Great. Then it's settled."

And that was that.

As for Jenny's point of view, she completely disagreed with her father. Well, she'd been disagreeing with her father for quite some time now, but this was _extremely _different. They couldn't just take her in just like that, take care of her and _not _tell anyone!

But who was she to disobey her father and Blair's wishes? She was grounded enough as it is already, _fine, _she'd keep her mouth shut. _For now…_

Like her father said, if her condition goes beyond their control, she was blabbering to someone, _anyone _she saw that could help her – _them -_ with Blair.

"I still think they deserve to know..." Jenny frowned.

Blair glared. "If you as ever open your mouth – "

"…And I won't. I'm just saying." Jenny interrupted, finishing her own sentence.

An awkward pause occurred among the trio, all momentarily caught up on how the next words should be…They were all from such different worlds. How they ended up in the same room, helping one another, they would never know.

Rufus, being the parent, decided to speak up, asking, "So what is it you intend to do now?"

Well, it was a school day. She was feeling quite better. Still weak, but compared to last night, it was all right now. Chuck would probably be back from Monaco by now, and _shit. Her phone._ She knew he'd probably be calling. And he'd probably be worried and wondering as to why she wasn't answering.

She was seriously in dangerous grounds. She had to get out of this place. And act as if nothing dire had happened the night before.

She slowly turned to Jenny's father and smiled like she did with her father when she was about to ask him something, perhaps a favor.

Rufus may not be _her _father, but he knew that look any day. He sighed.

"Mr. Humphrey," _Wait for it, wait for it_. "Could you arrange for me to be released _today? _Right now, maybe?_" _

_Crap. _He was already having trouble with his one daughter and now he was going to adopt the one who caused his daughter so much trouble. Not that he really blamed Blair for Jenny's 180 degree change. That change had always been Jenny's choice anyway.

Rufus instantly protested, seeing the chances to be quite slim. "I don't think so, Blair. You're still weak. The doctors would probably agree with my thoughts."

Blair rolled her eyes playfully. She giggled and gave him a mischievous grin and stated the one liner that could get her anywhere…

"I'm Blair Waldorf. Nothing is impossible."

Rufus smiled sarcastically, reeling from such arrogance. Seriously, this girl had so much sides to her, he couldn't keep track with the swift changes.

"Just get the papers done. I'll take care of the doctors. I just _need _to be out _today."_

Jenny shook her head in disbelief, refraining herself from rolling her eyes. "And why is that?"

Blair smirked like she always had in the presence of Jenny. "Not that it's any of _your _business, but Chuck's coming home today. I need to make an appearance."

Jenny just sighed, too tired to respond. Whatever Blair wants, she gets. Jenny was too tired to care that Blair could possibly trample all over her again just to get what she wanted.

With that said, Rufus sighed and made himself to get up from where he sat. "So… _To Do List. _1. Keep mouth shut about dying girl. 2. Adopt dying girl. 3. Sign release papers and bribe doctors?" And rhetorically, he added, "Adopting you is going to be work. Would you like breakfast along with that?"

Blair thought about it. She smiled cheerfully. "Actually, that's four things…" She giggled again before her eyes flickered to Jenny, still looming above her. "I think I'll take Jenny with me. We'll take ourselves out for breakfast."

And that was the _very _moment when it seemed as if the sky had just fallen above their heads.

Because…_whoa, _that _never _happened before.

And again, Rufus was reeling from the statement just uttered, looking at Blair as if she was some sort of alien on a hospital bed.

Jenny didn't know whether to feel elated or worried. With Blair, everything was so _unpredictable. _

But whatever. Everything paranormal seemed to be currently happening to her these days.

She sighed tiredly, "Dad, I'll just go with Blair to school, take care of her, and then head home."

"Yeah, about that. We have _a lot_ to talk about when you do get home. I mean it, Jenny. _A lot._" And with that, Rufus made his exit out.

Jenny tried to compose herself by giving herself a minute and counting to ten.

And here she was, worrying over the fact that she was going to share breakfast with Blair Waldorf?

_Wow. _Starting now, _that _has got to be the least of all her problems, considering everything.

She finally turned back to Blair, who was silently staring at her with an unreadable expression that made Jenny comfortable.

She tried to smile instead, "Let's get you out of that horrible hospital gown, shall we?"

_Weirdness Alert Number 47: _

Blair just smiled and didn't give her usual bitchy retort.

* * *

Of course, Gossip Girl and the _entire _campus were on rampage when they all bore witness to the sight before them.

_Spotted: Reinstated Queen B and recently dethroned Queen J seen walking up the steps of the MET as if they were the oldest friends._

_Perhaps a WTF wouldn't be enough to quench my shock towards our latest Paris and Nicole "besties" or… "foes", whatever they're posing as now. Breakfast anyone? Can someone explain to me what exactly is going on? I'm tired of these guessing games._

"Quite the stir up you've caused, B." Jenny began as they seated themselves on the steps.

Blair rolled her eyes. "Please, you love the attention too."

"I said I was done with this, remember?"

"Aww. Too bad, guess when I'm gone you can take my place. See? Win-win for you." Blair sweetly bit back, nonchalant.

Jenny just gazed on, sadness welling up in her being, she hated it. Blair was acting like dying anytime soon was not a big deal. How she did it, Jenny did not know. And no, as much as she wanted it so much before, she wasn't quite as ecstatic about being on top as she was back then.

_Not when she'd be taking over after a dead girl._

She fought the tears growing on the back of her eyes. _Damn it._

They silently ate their breakfast, lost in their own thoughts, waiting for the girls to come. They usually did at this time. But since last night's events still was the talk of the town amongst all other, the girls probably wouldn't be joining them for breakfast this morning.

Oh, but someone else would.

And he was making his out his limo, now parked on the sidewalk before them, when Blair saw him.

She panicked for a minute but managed to calm herself in time. She couldn't let him know anything was amiss last night.

But he probably suspected something as he now made his way up the steps and to her, a look of dead set determination in his eyes. His gaze never swayed. He kept his eyes straight at her. She gulped and almost faltered. _Almost. _

Without looking at Jenny, Chuck said, "I need to borrow my girlfriend for a minute."

Jenny just nodded, not that it really mattered since no one bothered to even look at her. Blair stood up, still pretending nothing was wrong and Chuck had that unreadable expression etched all over his face.

Chuck gently pulled her away, wanting to give them some privacy. She still held that guarded expression on her face, smile in tact and he wanted to just wipe it completely from her face, wanting to know what was up.

In low voice, he began, "Where have you been?"

"Home."

_A lie. They both knew._

"That's great." Chuck said sarcastically. "Great to know you were home when Dorota called me asking where _you _were and what time _you'll_ be getting home, if _ever _you would."

_Oh shit. _

Chuck waited, silently daring her to lie again. She just glared and added a couple hundred more defense walls to that already guarded expression she had.

"I don't understand how it's any of your business where I am or am not."

For a minute, Chuck was blown. But no, he wouldn't let her trampling all over him get to him. Not now. He _needed _to know what was going on.

He retorted angrily, "It becomes _my_ business since you're _my _girlfriend and you're worrying me. Where were you last night?"

"I was with Jenny, okay?!" Blair slightly raised her voice, and he had a feeling he was really getting to her. _Good._ Because he needed her to start spilling. He was _not _going to allow himself to become like Dan when he was with Serena. _No fucking way in hell._

He knew something was wrong. He could see it in her eyes. She was panicking. She was keeping something from him and he wasn't going to let her go until she told him what was wrong. He'd skip the whole day, standing here with her until she finally told him what was bothering her.

"What's wrong?" His earlier harsh tone mellowing down. Her eyes seemed to intensify in fright at that question.

"Nothing." Blair replied a little too quickly.

"Blair..." He tried again, gently placing his hands on her shoulders. She flinched at his touch and he looked back extremely concerned. "What's wrong? You can tell me anything, remember? It's me, Blair. _Me_. Chuck. Anything bad you've done, I get it. You can tell me. You don't need to be afraid of me. Don't lie to me."

Again, he asked as her eyes began to look at everything else but him, "What's wrong?"

Blair was panicking. He was getting to her. And the big problem was the words were so close from spilling from her lips, because no, she didn't want Jenny or anyone else to know. She wanted _him _to know first and foremost because she _needed _him so much in her dire time of need.

She needed him so much…

…_but she couldn't have him._

Because she would end up hurting him. She, of all people, knew how much hurt he had already gone through ever since childhood. And now, instead of taking it all away, as her duty of being his first girlfriend ever, she was just going to add up to it.

She _could not _make herself do that to him anymore.

She already felt too guilty for what she'd already done to him in the past.

She didn't want to see that look of sadness Jenny or Mr. Humphrey give her, be in Chuck's eyes, of all people. She couldn't stand it.

She was usually selfish. Always had been. She'd get anything she wanted no matter what it took. But things were different now. The tables have turned on her. Completely making a 180 degree turn on her. And she couldn't be selfish anymore.

_She just couldn't…_

She was running out of time. Now was _not_ the time to drag down the people she cared about because of her selfishness.

She couldn't hurt him _that_ way.The greatest pain was losing someone through death right?

_So…_

With her mind set on her decision, she finally made herself look straight into his intense eyes, fought for control, fought back the tears growing, and fought back the little tinge of pain brewing inside of her.

She needed all the strength she could muster to say with all the false meaning in her voice,

"We need to break up."

To say he didn't expect that was the _greatest _understatement of the entire _century. _

For a full minute, Chuck just stood his ground, beyond stunned, with a dose of confusion slowly changing his features. He was speechless. He was sure he didn't hear her right…

"We need to break up, Chuck."

_There it was again._

Blair watched as his eyes slowly turned from shock to confusion to hurt, the finality of her words slowly beginning to be absorbed by his entire being.

She wanted to take it back! She did. She _wanted _to be him… but she couldn't. She was in dangerous grounds every time he would ask her what was wrong, the words, _'I'm going to die' _on the tip of her tongue, _every single time_ he gazed at her with concern and worry.

She didn't want to lie to him anymore. She knew he wouldn't buy it anyway. He was Chuck Bass. And Chuck Bass would stop at nothing to figure out her little secret.

And she couldn't let that happen.

_She had to let him go…_

"Blair," His voice sounded so lost, so confused, Blair almost faltered and desperately wanted to take him in her arms and hold him. "What is it? Is it someone else? It's okay…it's... I, of all people, understand. You know that. You don't need to this, Blair."

"No. It's not someone else." She wouldn't lie to him about that.

A small tide of relief washed over him. He could sway her, he knew. He always could.

"I want to be with you, Blair. I'm really trying here. _Please…"_

His stare was so deep, so intense holding all the truth there was in the world and _God..._ she almost gave in.

_But..._

Protection over keeping her secret won over giving in to him.

And with another sum of strength, she said without falter,

"I don't want to be with you."

They stood there for another long moment. He was trying to read her; unable to accept what was currently happening. To him, this was just another nightmare. And he'd wake up from it soon enough.

But when Blair started to move past him, leaving him completely desolated, with nothing but the words, "I'm sorry," echoing through the wind, he knew this was no nightmare and this was cold _fucking _reality.

The girl he was in love with just broke up with him because she didn't really want to be with him.

And that had been what was wrong all along, he realized.

_God…how could he have been so stupid? _

He slowly turned around and walked the other way, trying to grasp the reality on what was happening. He felt so, so, _so_ numb from this latest blow.

What had he done to deserve this?

He wanted to turn around, back to her, run to her and kiss her with all the passion and love he had in him, just so she could come back to her senses and come back to _him._

_I don't want to be with you…_

…repeated in his head over and over again. Drumming, nonstop, unceasing.

And he carried on the most painful walk he ever had to walk in his entire life as he walked away from the woman he loved without looking back, _forcing_ himself to _not_ look back and run back to her.

And she walked in the other direction, slowly, away from him, trying to grasp the reality of what she had just done. She was breaking inside and all she wanted to do was to turn around, run into his arms and take back her words.

But if she did that, then she would have to hurt him more by telling him she was dying…

_God…_what had she done to deserve this?

_I want to be with you…_

…repeated in her head over and over again. Drumming, nonstop, unceasing.

But she carried on the most painful walk she ever had to walk in her entire life as she walked away from the man she had grown to love without looking back, _forcing_ herself to not look back and run back to him.

_He couldn't know...He just couldn't..._

* * *

Jenny saw the entire thing.

And as Blair finally made her way to her, she wanted to slap the bitch for the doing the most stupidest thing she had ever done in the entire world.

She stood up, forgetting her breakfast, outraged. "What the hell are you doing?"

Blair held her ground. "You have eyes. Use them."

Jenny's urge to strangle this girl before her intensified to no end. "Just _tell _him the truth!"

"I can't okay?!" Blair yelled back, losing her composure for a second.

Jenny's tears suddenly spilled without warning. "_Why? _Why do you have to do this to yourself? _He _can help you!"

Blair was back to being frozen, unable to give back any form of human emotion. "Stop crying. Queens don't cry. You'd better start learning that lesson if you're going to take my place."

"STOP IT!" Jenny practically screeched. "You love him! _Okay?_ I saw everything. It's so obvious how much you love him! And he loves you just as much, if not more so!"

"Then you'll understand why I'm trying to protecting him from something as painful as this, Little J!" Blair exclaimed, losing her former sense of control.

"You don't understand…" Blair continued, her exclaims going down to a whisper. "It's better this way. He'll fight for me if I tell him, I know. But he can't fight for a lost cause, right?"

And she began to break. Everything shattering into tiny little pieces...And even, she didn't know how to piece them all back together.

"I want to be with him…_so much…_But I can't, Little J. _I just can't…" _Tears wouldn't stop falling now, all of what had been held back were pouring, unceasing. "This is for his own good anyway. I'm just trying to protect him."

"And what about you? Huh?" Jenny fought back, her own tears ceasing as Blair broke down before her. "Ever thought about that? You _need_ him!"

"And I can't have him!"

Jenny stood, holding her ground, determined and challenging this girl before her, her tears drying up fast.

"I'm not going to let you just do this stupid thing."

"I don't see how this is any of your business, Jenny."

Jenny practically would've slapped her right then and there. Because no, she wasn't going to let herself get trampled on ever again.

"I'm sorry." Jenny bit back sarcastically. "But Dad was right. The minute you confessed to _me _instead of _him, _it has become _my _business. So suck it up and deal with it, bitch."

Despite herself, Blair reeled from this show of disobedience and courage.

Jenny wasn't finished yet, "If you're not going to tell him, then _I _will. How's that for not making this _my _business?"

And with that, Jenny huffed away in anger and disbelief as Blair watched her retreating figure helplessly.

Because even _she, _Jenny Humphrey couldn't stand it anymore.

They were the stupidest people ever, for not realizing the truth, which was their feelings. And God, since she was already sucked up in this mess, she wasn't just going to stand by and watch anymore.

She going to _God damn _fix this.

And Blair better had not screw this up because Jenny was already doing a fuck load of shit for her already. Even more so than getting her dry cleaning.

_Damn it. _

She really,_ really_ hated that bitch.

_Ask her why she's doing this for Blair again?_

* * *

Chuck Bass completely skipped on school today, locking himself in his suite and drowning himself in his only best friend in the whole universe.

_Scotch._

He had just returned from Monaco, and the first thing he does is contact Blair. She doesn't answer. For like ten million times he tried to call her, voice mail her, text her, email her…So he obviously gets worried, rounds up the army and tries to find out where she is.

And when he does, she, she suddenly tells him she doesn't want to be with him?

_Well fuck her! _

Because he was _Chuck Bass, _God damn it. And no way, no _fucking _way, was he going to succumb himself to not being wanted by some mere girl!

Who was she anyway?

She meant absolutely _nothing _to him!

He was Chuck Bass. And he wasn't in love with her or anyone. Chuck Bass doesn't fucking _love. _And all Blair ever did to him was side track him from who he really was. Made him someone who he wasn't, deluding him about silly thoughts of love and shit. And all this time, he's been wasting his time on some bitch who wasn't even worth his time of the day.

Completely change him and then trash him again in the nearest garbage disposal?

Who in fuck's name did she think she was?

_He was Chuck Bass, _for heaven's sake. His life didn't need Blair Waldorf, prissy little bitch who twisted him from inside out.

Well, she'd twist him no more. He was through with her as she was through with him.

His life consisted of women, boozing and partying. Being irresponsible and unfaithful and shifting from one woman to another was his lifestyle. That was who he was. And Blair Waldorf had no place in _his _world.

_Okay…so why was he locked up in his suite with nothing but scotch by his side again?_

Whatever. He was done with Blair. And it was time he finally got back to his own world. Neverland-tripping was over. Blair was gone and it was better it stayed that way.

_Well actually…_

She had been gone, long, long before.

Perhaps the minute she stepped out his limo their first time around or the minute she ran back to his best friend's arms the night of the Debutante Ball, he didn't know. But he was so stupid to not just let her stay _gone _and leave it at that.

He downed his scotch and let it burn his throat.

He couldn't believe he was back where he had started.

_Trying so desperately to kill those butterflies that ruined his life. _

_God…_He needed another refill.

He was just halfway into filling his glass when a knock on his door sounded, filling his suddenly painful ears.

_Damn it! _He slammed the bottle back down, a new sense of anger filling his entire being. He really wasn't in the mood. And who could it be disturbing his peace at this time of hour?

_Okay so maybe it was just 5 in the afternoon but that wasn't the point!_

Nevertheless, he made himself get up and make his way to his door. Already thinking of ways on how to send whoever it was far, far away.

If it was room service, he'd fire them for disturbing him. If it was some hot maid from downstairs coming to clean his room, then he'd fuck her brains out then throw her out again. If it was Serena, he'd tell her off because he wasn't in the mood to conceal secrets for her sake. If it was Dan, he'd give him the black eye he so deserved since the beginning.

And if it was Blair…oh, if it was _fucking _Blair, his ex-girlfriend, the bitch who completely tore him apart, coming back at him, then he was going to grab her, fuck her crazy and then throw _her _out, slamming the door on her way.

That was what _she _was, after all. A _whore. _Always has been. Always will be.

When he did open the door of his suite, he did not see anyone from room service, or some hot maid, or Serena or Dan…_Wow…_

It wasn't even Blair.

He had been running around town all day, shocked and overwhelmed by the current things happening around his life... But, _this _seemed to be climax of it all.

Because here was the person he _least _expected seeing to ever grace his doorstep in the time of his dark hour…or _any _hour, really.

Here, before him stood Jenny Humphrey, girl he had almost violated, quite a long time ago, a look of determination and fire in her eyes as she challengingly glared back at him.

_What the hell was going on?_

His look probably gave that thought away but if it did, Jenny did show that she saw it or at least, cared what he was thinking or feeling.

She had a reason for being here. And she was going to accomplish, no matter what.

This was for Blair anyway.

"We need to talk."

* * *

_To be continued..._

So okay, please don't kill me. HAHA. See? Blair's not dead at least, right?

Okay so, as I was saying earlier, I found this article from this site () that drove the brains out of my head, slamming onto that wall and then back to my head again...

Apparently, the shit we saw last may 18... you know those fucking last 5 minutes, wasn't what was ORIGINALLY SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN.

I shall quote this one FUCKING part that got to me, (if you wanna read the full article just go to that site, I mentioned above :D )

_"Casting Director Renee Godbout on the high-stakes drama in the original season 1 finale script  
By Renee Godbout_

_Now that the season finale of Gossip Girl has aired, I can let you all in on a little secret. Not only was the original script completely different, the first ending was so much better. Here's what would have gone down if the show had kept the first script:_

_Chuck & Blair  
The major changes of the show include my favorite characters, and their drama would have made the finale really good:_

_Instead of waiting at the helicopter pad for Chuck (Ed Westwick), Blair (Leighton Meester) is actually waiting at the airport. She runs into Carter Baizen (Sebastian Stan), our favorite bad boy who made a guest appearance earlier in the series. She tells Carter that she and Chuck are together, and that she's waiting for him. Blair continues to look at her watch, nervously watching the time fly by. Carter suggest this is exactly the type of game Chuck would play: Making her believe he was in love with her and then leaving her stranded alone at the airport. Blair doesn't believe that… at first. As it gets later and later, Carter's suggestion makes more and more sense._

_At the same time, Chuck is in his limo, impatiently waiting in traffic. He is complaining to the driver about the traffic when they come upon a car accident. Chuck sees Lily sitting on the curb. She's crying, clutching a lily in her hand, and is hunched over what looks like a body. Someone is draping a cloth over the body's head. Chuck tells the driver to stop and gets out of the car. Lily looks up, sees him, and shakes her head at his questioning glance. Chuck's father is dead._

_Unaware of this, Blair is finally convinced that Chuck has stood her up and decides to go to Europe with Carter instead. End of episode._

_What high-stakes drama it would have been! The new season of Gossip Girl would have started with Chuck's anger and sadness, as well as Blair's guilt. The original finale would have amped up everything about the show, instead of the relationship cop-out they aired last Monday night."_

That's not the whole article. But yeah, that STRUCK ME the most.

WHEN I FIRST READ THAT, I WAS LIKE SCREAMING AND SHIT. THAT WOULD'VE BEEN A MUCH BETTER ENDING...tragic and shit.. BUT UGH. Anything than what they showed. GOD.

ALL I CAN IS: FUCKING WRITERS.

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH... oh well, I'm over it. haha. :P Just thought I'd share.

Okay. R&R please. Thanksie. :)


	13. Chapter 13: To Tell or Not Tell

**A/N: OMFG!! I'M BACK. I'M BACK. I'M BA—CK!!**

**I MEAN CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE IT?!**

**HELLO WORLD! MY GAWD, HAVE I MISSED YOU ALL!**

And I do deeply apologize for the EXTREMELY long, LONG absence.

Its debutante season for me **(best evening/season EVER, I just have to say)**, plus right after that (as in the day after debut night), shows, rehearsals and school works started piling up like crazy! And it's still piling up! I really just want to get this year over with really.

I do thank EVERYONE who gave such wonderful reviews despite my eternity-seeming absence. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for the support!

**Special Dedication: **This chapter is dedicated to _**gleechild, **_one of the most talented writers here _ever__**. **_It's her birthday. Well, it was like **EONS** ago… I am so, so, so SORRY. You do NOT how sorry I am. She's been giving me all these PM's, urging me to update. And I have been writing! It's just that I couldn't write straight coz I'd have tons of other things to do. I just felt so bad that I couldn't update immediately as soon as I could. It sucks. So much apologies to gleechild.  
Thank you for your wonderful stories, I am in love with _all_ of them. Seriously. I'm so excited for the next chapters in your stories, though you drive us all crazy with the cliffhangers. RAWR. (P.S. will get back to reading them too :p) Been so out of date lately. You are the only I know who sends PM's dutifully to authors like me who haven't updated for a long while. Again, so sorry.

Please, please, PLEASE forgive me for the super duper overdue update!

As for the rest of you, hope you enjoy this chapter and the next (hopefully will be coming soon, cross your fingers!).

I've been out of it for awhile, so this might not be as great as the rest… Nevertheless, ENJOY!

AND I HAVE TRULY MISSED YOU ALL!

Here goes…

* * *

_Where's your bravado now?_

Jenny's mind taunted her as she cautiously placed her delicate feet inside the suite of the most dangerous man of the Upper East Side, trembling inside despite herself.

_Dangerous. _

At least, to her. Apparently, she wasn't completely over what he pulled on her during the Kiss on the Lips party. Her long ago buried feeling of fear and trepidation were slowly surfacing now that she was in this close proximity with him again.

And for Christ's sake, she was now officially _inside _his suite.

_Oh Dan would kill her if he found out where she was now..._

Not that she cared what he thought these days, but… _still…_

Besides, this was for Blair anyway…

_Blair…_

Damn it.

She cursed herself over and over again as she continued to walk towards Chuck's massive windows, gazing at anything and everything except Chuck himself. Who knew what she'd find in those dark, intense orbs she so feared and despised?

Not that he'd try anything on her again…

There was Blair and Dan and Serena to give him a punch in the gut, but…that didn't mean she trusted Chuck at all.

Anything could still happen.

_So yeah…whatever…_

She was so engulfed in her thoughts, she didn't even realize she was shaking so much already, nor did she realize how pale her features were.

_So much for Blair right?_

Meanwhile, Chuck stealthily moved from his spot at the door to his counter, silently observing the younger sister of his stepsister's boyfriend, wondering what the hell could this little bitch be doing in his suite, now of all times of day.

She was afraid of him, he knew. He could see it from her stance and the way she stood very far away from him. He couldn't blame her though.

But she had come here for a purpose and whatever it was, it was probably so damn important that it made her quench her fear for him and actually come _here _to his suite during the _worst _day of his life where he was in the _worst _mood ever.

If she was here to ask him for help to gain the throne again after what Blair had done to her while he was in Monaco, he might as well just throw her out right about now.

Although he hated Blair now, he wasn't about to help Jenny to get back against Blair anytime soon. In his perspective, Jenny deserved whatever Blair threw at her. After her yogurt stint on the first day back? No way was Chuck helping this little bitch. He knew really liked her anyway.

And if she was here to throw herself at him… well, in the mood he was in, he was up for some deflowering, even if it was Little J.

But _only_ if she willing came to him.

No way was he going to allow himself to get another black eye from some Brooklyn trash… or his stepsister… or worse, Blair…

He wasn't in the mood for any of that crap.

_So yeah…whatever…_

A long and awkward silence settled upon them. That, along with practically a 10 meter gap between the both of them, who knew how long they had been standing there looking away from each other, waiting for one of them to speak first…

Well... at least one of them was looking away…

Chuck, on the other hand, was currently looking at her. No way would he speak first. She came here, she should talk. He'll wait.

Although why not drive her a little insane during the process right? Waiting patiently had always been a boring task to do. Besides, it was too silent. Why not try to break it without having to open his mouth?

And so he slowly made his way behind his bar counter, poured himself another glass of scotch, making all kinds of sounds as he did so.

From the corner of his eye, Jenny flinched but she continued to stare outside his window.

He smirked, amused. But he began to focus his attention to his scotch.

He spun the ice gently, but louder than how he usually did. He sipped from his drink quite louder than how he usually did. He took off his Rolex watch and threw it gently at his side, hoping the metal will make the right about of noise to disturb his unexpected guest.

By now, he was making all kinds of noise to completely drive his guest to insanity. He never looked up to her though. Nor did he rush himself to complete the tasks he set himself to do, which made it all the more annoying.

Chuck didn't even need to look back up to see Jenny's completely aggravated stance now. He could already feel it from where he stood behind the counter.

And he continued creating all the noise he could come up with. Perhaps this visit would be amusing after all…

Just a little more…

"OKAY! WILL YOU STOP IT ALREADY?!"

Chuck bit himself from laughing out loud. Instead he just gave his usual trademark smirk, amusement and glee written all over his features.

Little J's expression was so hilarious, so out of her usual character, he was so tempted to take a picture of her and send it to Gossip Girl. Just the perfect way to complete this tormenting day. Might as well pass out some of the pain to the others surrounding him.

Chuck just shrugged to her, indicating that he didn't give a rat's ass as to what she preferred. This was his suite anyway.

Jenny, on the other hand, was getting infuriated. She didn't give a rat's ass whether he owned this place or not, she wanted him to stop being so annoying and immature.

Perhaps her growing fury was a good thing since it was slowly washing away her fear of the playboy of Manhattan. She didn't notice that though as she continued to stare at him, incredulous. Didn't he even wonder as to the reason why she was even _here_, of all places?!

Then again…

_This was Chuck Bass she was face to face with…_

He would never wonder why a girl would knock at his door on a late afternoon during a school day. He probably was used to having girls knocking on his door. But this…

_This _was so not like that!

He turned away from her, pretending to concentrate on his scotch but really creating even more annoying noises now that she finally turned his attention to him.

Without warning, Jenny moved from her spot and suddenly she was angrily grabbing his scotch away from his hands, making most of its contents splatter on the carpeted floor.

Chuck Bass sat back on his chair, completely relaxed and unfazed and completely amused by this total display of anger.

He silently challenged her. She challenged him back full on. She was seriously getting sick of having to deal with Blair's bitchiness and she definitely wasn't going to let herself be affected by Chuck's mere display of nuisance.

"Do you even have any idea why I'm here?!"

Chuck just smiled, amused, shrugged his shoulders and motioned for her to continue. "Please. Enlighten me."

_Where was the knife?! Where is it?!_

Jenny thought furiously. Screw the Blair and Chuck loveship, she could murder him right now and end it all. Whatever Blair saw in him, Jenny will _never _know or ever understand.

She closed her eyes and took a breath. This was Chuck Bass she was talking to. Thinking that talking to him would be an easy task to do had been delusional of her. But she was here and she couldn't back out now that she'd started.

_Damn it._

"I'm here for Blair."

Immediately at the mention of his now ex-girlfriend, his playful features darkened and his face contorted into an angry scowl. He brought out another glass, poured his favorite contents in it and took another swing at his scotch, finishing it within a span of milliseconds and slamming the glass hard on the counter.

"What about _Blair?" _He hissed at her. She flinched visibly. He didn't give a shit. "What task has she sent you to do for her? Any other words she'd like to pass on that she couldn't say herself?"

And without waiting for her to reply, he stood up and pointed his hand to his door and said in the most menacingly tone Jenny had ever heard him speak,

"Get out."

To say that Jenny was completely scared shitless by now was a serious understatement.

She didn't dare move or even breathe. She just stared, shocked still at his pointed hand and his darkened features. Because _no, _she had never seen him go beserk like this and neither did she wish to ever again.

_Really, perfect timing to come to him right?_

When Chuck saw that she wasn't budging, he repeated his words even more profoundly which could have made Jenny's soul practically jump out of her own skin.

"_Get out!"_

Damn it!

How Jenny just wanted to run out like he ordered her to now.

But she couldn't.

And she didn't _fucking _understand why!

All it took was a single step and that was it.

But she seriously was glued to his carpeted floor.

_I'm here for Blair…_

_Blair…_

_Blair…_

_I'm dying…_

_There's a price to pay…_

_Dying…_

_Dying…_

_Here for Blair…_

_Blair…_

_Get out…_

"NO!"

It took Jenny a moment to realize that she had just screamed what she was thinking.

And that Chuck was looking at her as if he was faced with a demonic possessed girl.

And that she was panting heavily gasping for the life of her.

This whole Blair – Chuck situation was seriously getting very traumatic on her part.

But she was here now. If she had wanted to back out, she would've done so long before Chuck even ordered her out. But here she was.

Blair was in a lot of pain right now and was doing a bunch of stupid things, Serena was off to who-knows-what-land these days, Dan wouldn't really know what to do either, her dad was weird, Nate was…Nate and Jenny just happened to come along for the ride and so that left her to do all the deeds needed to be done…because that was her original role since this whole show started, finishing off deeds for other people above her.

So…

"No." Jenny repeated more calmly now. "No."

"Excuse me?" Chuck asked as if he heard her wrong.

"You heard me. I came here for a reason. That reason is Blair. I'm staying. I don't care what you say."

_Whoa…_

Little J, is that you?

Even she was proud of herself. Where'd that come from?

"Clearly you have no idea who you're talking to, Little J." Chuck said dangerously as he began to advance towards the blonde.

Jenny stood her ground. "Yeah I do. So shut up and listen."

"Make me."

_Stubborn ass. _

And Jenny still couldn't see what Blair saw in this manwhore that now stood before her with dangerous eyes and a mind she could not read.

"I don't want to hear anything about Blair."

"Well suck it up because this is important."

"Don't make me throw you out of here."

Jenny had had ENOUGH! So she completely _lost_ it. And she didn't care.

"WILL YOU JUST LISTEN?!" Jenny practically screeched at his face. "Blair didn't send me here, okay? Blair was stupid enough to break up with you because she has this _secret, _okay? A BIG, BIG SECRET that she's _dying _to tell you but she can't because she thinks she'll hurt you and she doesn't want that. So she hurts you in this way because she thinks it's easier this way.

She _loves _you, okay? And that's why she's doing this and a bunch of other stupid things!"

Jenny was panting heavily at the end of her speech-rant and felt a sigh of relief when she finally got that all out of her chest.

Chuck stood immobile before her, trying to comprehend what the Humphrey girl was saying. One thing caught his attention though…

"What secret?"

Apparently, that _secret _was the cause of all this chaos. And Chuck realized that secret must've been big enough for Blair to break up with him.

Jenny meanwhile hesitated. Apparently, that _secret _was still _not _off her chest yet.

Blair didn't even know Jenny presented herself here. Blair didn't want Chuck or anyone to know anything either. But Blair needed someone who could take care of her… and unfortunately, Jenny was too weak to do that task right.

The decision rested on her shoulders now…

_To tell or not to tell…?_

She was weighing every possible pro and con there was in a span of 60 seconds and Chuck was patiently waiting for her to spill the beans already.

One time, not so long ago, she had found herself in the same position. Except it wasn't Chuck she was faced with. It was Nate. And she wasn't trying to help Blair then, she was trying to destroy her.

How the cards have completely reversed now despite the similarity of the situation. But Blair's secrets kept getting heavier and heavier to weigh and perhaps now was the perfect time to say it and _Chuck _was the perfect person to tell it to...

Just like how Nate had been...

But then...

The confusion and guilt of her previous actions not so long ago ate her away. Blair was going through enough. She was dying, for crying out loud. Bitch as she was, nobody deserved that kind of fate. And Jenny could tell Blair really, really liked Chuck, even if Blair wouldn't always admit it...

She knew the right thing to do was to tell. This was the perfect moment. This was it. This was the moment Chuck would finally know the truth. And then he could help Blair get through whatever.

But instead, Jenny found herself saying…

"I'm sorry I can't tell you."

Because this time, it really didn't feel right. A person's life was literally on the line here. And whatever else happens, the decision still had to come from Blair.

It was wrong that it had to be Jenny to tell him, the love of Blair's life. It was cruel if he didn't hear from Blair herself and heard it from someone else.

He'd go insane.

Dear God, when had she started to become a humanitarian for the people she had swore a hatred oath to?

But Chuck wouldn't have that. Whatever that secret was, he needed to know _now. _"Then why are you here if you're not going to tell me what's really wrong with Blair? Just spill it, Little J. What's wrong with Blair?"

Jenny took a breath and tried to keep her tears at bay.

"Blair's going through so much now. She's going through a lot of pain. And she doesn't need to add to her pain by hurting you in telling you what's really up.

She'll tell you when it's the right time. She will. But right now, _today, _you can't hear it from me. It's not right. Not like this."

Chuck took in what she said. He didn't accept it and it only sparked his curiosity and need to know what the secret was even more so but for now he decided she was right. He'd wait for Blair herself to tell him what was really wrong. And if she wouldn't, then he'd figure it out on his own.

That was how Chuck and Blair functioned.

"Blair needs you now more than ever, even if she doesn't realize it now." Jenny continued. She sighed heavily, suddenly very tired.

She then began to walk away and finally make her way out. "I have to go." She murmured to the silent, dark man as she slowly walked away.

Before her hand touched the cold steel of his door knob, his voice echoed behind her.

"How did you know about her secret?"

She glanced at his profile; his slouched back with hands on his hips, restless, as if unsure of what to do next, his face filled with the one emotion Jenny thought would never appear upon the man she thought was a beast: concern.

Concern for Blair…_perhaps he really does love her…_ Loss of control, like he needed to know what it was that haunting the woman he loves. Because how could he help her if he didn't know what was hurting her?

But Jenny couldn't tell. Jenny didn't want to be the one to destroy him now and see that lost, earth-shattering look in his eyes when he would find out that truth.

That the woman he loves was slowly dying.

She wouldn't be able to handle it.

And she understood now that Blair wouldn't be able to either.

Hence, all the secrecy.

And maybe Jenny was finally understanding now as well why Blair would fall for someone like him.

There was a soul hidden behind that playboy facade Chuck presented to the world. And Blair was able to bring it out of him.

_Maybe that's why they're perfect for each other._

"Slip of the tongue, I guess." She shrugged to him in response. "Maybe she just couldn't take it anymore, holding inside such a big secret."

With that, Jenny finally left his suite, leaving the manwhore with a hidden heart in a state of great bafflement.

* * *

_Waldorf Residence – 5 hours later_

She heard the elevator doors ding signaling a guest but Blair Waldorf paid it no heed as she continued to stare out her glass windows, eyes sore from crying, heart aching from the actions she had done earlier during the day.

She _still_ couldn't believe it. Couldn't believe that she had done what she had done.

She just couldn't believe that…he was _gone _now…

_Completely…Forever..._

And she had been the one to push him away…

_Again…_

With good reason, though.

Nevertheless, it made her heart tighten in pain at the realization that _he _was gone _again…_ And that there was no chance she'd ever get him back anymore.

Unless she'd tell him about her heart condition.

_Which she wouldn't…_

She'd never tell him _ever._

Even if she died now, he'd still never know.

She sighed tiredly and held back again the watery tears that threatened to overflow her somewhat composed self as she gazed out to the city of Manhattan, where the lights continued to flow and the life continued to surge even if hers was literally flickering out.

She was like the hourglass.

_Running out of time…_

Blair was panicking now and scared out of her wits. Everything had been so perfect...

_Well…no. _That was a lie. But ever since, she and Chuck became okay again, things had become a happier fill in her life and then this curse suddenly decided to ram her up against the wall!

And now there was no happy fill and no Chuck and yeah, her light was still dying out.

She was so, _so _scared! God, how she wanted to talk to someone about it or just do something crazy to make her forget that she was dying and that she just lost the man she realized she loved.

And where was Serena these days? Blair wondered despairingly, missing her best friend so.

It felt like ages since she last saw the blonde princess. She missed her Serena so much; she wanted to bake her favorite cookies already just to make her come here!

_The elevator ding! _Blair suddenly realized.

What if it was Serena?

She must have heard about her earlier break up with Chuck and decided to come here at last to cheer her up.

Blair would forgive her for coming so late. It didn't matter as long as Serena was here now. Serena would make her forget about everything. Serena would make her feel better.

That's what best friends do right?

And so, with a newfound excitement and relief, she quickly wiped her damp eyes and turned away from her window, only to stop dead in her tracks as came face to face with…

"Chuck?"

Her voice felt so surreal to her as if she was simply caught in an ethereal dream. But she blinked several times over and realized that Chuck was really here in her room, staring at her, hands in his pockets, still donning the outfit he wore when she last saw him this morning.

_Oh my God..._

She couldn't believe it! She...What was he doing here?!

Her heart leapt at the sight of him and for a fraction of a second, her eyes gave away a glimpse of happiness.

She instantly hid it though, praying inside that he didn't notice.

Her other painful reality came crashing onto her soon after and she fought to control her emotions.

They were broken up and it was going to stay that way if she was going to protect him.

"What are you doing here, Chuck?" Blair asked in a weary tone.

Chuck didn't respond to her though. He didn't give his usual smirk or his usual snide comment or any sign of anger or hatred.

He didn't do any of the usual things that he did and instead, remained silent and continued to stare at her, looking at her so intently as if he was seeing through her soul, it made her extremely uncomfortable.

Because she knew he'd see through her.

And he'd see how broken she was.

And he'd never leave her.

And she had to make him leave.

She just _had _to!

After a few more long moments of standing under shocked silence, Chuck began to walk around quietly in her room. Scanning her dresser, touching items here and there, staring at a few pictures she hung on her mirror... Basically, taking everything in sight.

Blair watched as he scanned her room, uncomprehending of his actions.

She spoke up, wishing her floor would suddenly open up and swallow him."Chuck. What do you want? I thought I made things clear with you this morning? _I don't want anything to do with you anymore." _

It hurt her to say it. But she did. Her greatest paranoia though was her fear that her voice would be wavering every time she uttered him those painful words. When they were nothing but playthings to each other and she was still deluded in the illusion of Nate, it had been all so much easier.

Things have changed now.

_Shit. _Because yeah, he'd definitely see right through her.

There was a reason why she loved him right?

_Damn it. _

Another thing that was currently bothering her now was how he just continued to survey her room slowly and silently as if he didn't even hear a thing.

She realized that he still hadn't said a single word to her ever since he entered her room.

"Chuck!"

She hoped that would get his attention. It didn't make him retort like he usually did. But it did however finally make him turn his attention away from the other decorations that composed her room.

He slowly made a 180 degree turn to her. He was silent, standing a few meters away from her, staring at her with unreadable eyes and for a second, Blair seriously became worried for his mental health. Perhaps the breakup wasn't such a good idea on him after all.

She was about to call his name again and try to get him back to his senses when he suddenly spoke.

And his first words ever since came to see her were the ones she never expected to hear coming from him... _ever._

"I love you."

_Wha - ?_

_What?_

_WHAT?!_

This was a dream. Really. It was. _Blair, wake up!_

But it wasn't, she knew.

Even if it did seem so dream-like, it so wasn't...My goodness, where was her breath when she needed it?

She blinked another 10 billion times before she got that not-a-dream part covered.

Because she could feel him advancing towards her. She could seriously _feel_ his arms wrap her thin waist, pulling her closer to him. She could smell the heavy alcohol emanating from him. He'd been drinking but she knew he was sober enough. And she could feel his velvet voice caress her entire being as he repeated his earlier shocking statement.

"Didn't you hear what I said? _I love you, _Blair Waldorf. And I'm not going anywhere."

His eyes bore into her intensely. He meant what was he saying. He was serious, _so_ serious that she realized that he wasn't playing games anymore and that he _really _wasn't going anywhere.

Beautiful as his words were, the weight of his words suddenly caused that fear in her open up again within her.

He couldn't love her.

He _just _couldn't.

It was one thing to prove to her that he would do anything for her, it was a completely whole new thing to actually _proclaim _it to her.

Something that was a very rare thing on Chuck's part.

She tried to push him away and get out of his arms before she completely melted in them but he held her down.

And she wanted to cry…

"Let me go, Chuck." She commanded quietly, running out of strength.

"No." He simply said.

"_Please…" _She begged.

She was begging and she was crying and she couldn't look at him. But he shook his head softly and gently brought a hand to her chin, forcing her to look up at him again.

"I can't. And I'm sorry. But I love you."

He'd never told her these words before, they both knew. He had too much pride or too much fear in the past to say those simple but deep words. He finally let those all go without a care, if only to prove to her that he meant what he felt and what he said.

God, she wanted to cry…

She was…

What to say? What to say?

She loved him too. _I love you too, Chuck…_

"I can't…"

Chuck held her tighter to him. "Can't what? Don't fight this. Don't push me away. I won't buy it. Whatever it is, whatever you're _hiding_, I _don't_ care. I'm _not _going anywhere, no matter what you do."

_I love you._

He repeated. Said with such firmness and grace and sincerity, it put Nate to absolute shame.

God, he was so beautiful right at this moment. But she just...

She couldn't... She had to resist.

"I don't want to hurt you, Chuck. I'm trying to protect you."

"_Don't._ You've hurt me. One too many times already." He smiled amusingly at his own joke and gently kissed her on the lips. A sign that he had forgiven her for every deed she had done against him. "But I'm still here. And one more wouldn't make me go away."

"You don't understand…" Blair pleaded, unrelenting.

"Neither do you._ I love you,_ Blair. And I don't care what it is. I'm staying with you. So let me. Be with me."

And he pulled her lips to his and kissed her with a passion he thought had long ago died.

No. It would never die. Not this. Not his love. Not their kisses. Not their passions.

Blair found herself kissing back with an equal fervor. She hungered for him too. And God, she wanted this as much as he did.

This could be the _most_ beautiful moment in her entire life.

Chuck finally telling her he loved her.

It came out so unexpected, so unpredicted. And she couldn't stop it. Like all the other factors that came into her life.

She broke away from his kiss, her eyes and cheeks damp from tears.

_Happy tears._

She didn't think what the consequence would be anymore. She just wanted to be with him. And she didn't want to part ways with him ever.

Breaking up with him was the stupidest thing she'd ever done in her life, second only to not telling him about her heart condition.

Soon though. Someday.

_One at a time though._

But now, she had something else to say. Something she knew he deserved to know as well, more than _anything _in the world_._

"Chuck?" She whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I love you too, Chuck. I do. And I'm so, so sorry for _everything…" _

And she began to cry again. She hated looking so weak before him, before anyone but she couldn't control it anymore.

These days, she just couldn't her emotions.

Chuck gently pulled her to look at him again. He didn't say anything. Just looked into her eyes.

And he began to wipe her tears away.

"Tears don't suit you Waldorf."

And he smiled at her, happily. Ever so. He looked so beautiful, it took her breath away.

He kissed her hungrily again. Kissed her and kissed her until she could've died happily already.

But he wasn't done yet.

Their reunion wouldn't be complete unless he lay her onto her silky sheets atop of that bed of hers.

And when he did, he didn't stop kissing her. Passionately, hungrily. He didn't stop. _Wouldn't stop. _And she didn't stop kissing him back either.

She loved every minute of it.

They loved every minute of it.

Being finally back together in each other's arms after such a tiring day.

Their love making would last through the night and into the morning.

They were happy. They felt so much relief finally being together again.

This was a beautiful moment.

And no one would ever ruin them ever again.

They were back together again and nothing, not even death for now, would come in between them again.

* * *

Of course, they were so caught up in each other's arms, they didn't realize the figure quietly standing outside the slightly opened doors of Blair's, watching their exchange of love, a malicious glint in her cerulean eyes.

_A plan was slowly forming. _

Oh my. They were all going to be so _in love _when _she _was through with them.

Perhaps the being worst than death had suddenly decided to befall upon Blair's footsteps this evening.

Georgina Sparks quietly closed the rest of the door behind her as she began her way out. She didn't want to watch the lovemaking.

They did need a little privacy after all.

Another scandal on Blair's part would probably kill her. _Literally. _

Besides, Georgina was thinking of something much, _much _better for Snow White.

It was really amazing how two people could be so into each other, they would never notice or hear the coming of another unwanted guest.

What she hoped to be Serena hiding under the wings of her best friend was a hope that turned into something that was even way better than Serena.

An additional bonus to her grand scheme of plans.

My, my, was Blair Waldorf giving her a lot of open treats lately to use to her advantage and revenge against Serena.

Speaking of, she still couldn't find the blonde princess.

_Where was Serena? _

Georgina Sparks was getting impatient.

_No matter. _Georgina didn't mind Serena's sudden disappearance now. Earlier, she had been extremely annoyed and sought her out here. Hopefully taunt her by telling her oh-so-innocent bitch of best friend their own little secret. But Serena didn't turn up. And the night has changed all her plans.

She was going back to her humble abode to plan how she'd go about her next move aimed towards the Snow White and her new Prince.

And with one last glance at the Waldorf penthouse, Georgina Sparks stepped into the elevators and whisked away into the night.

* * *

**A/N: **Alright, here it. CHAPTER 13 after like an eon and a century has passed.

In a recent review by SoNotEmo, there was mention about something from House. That was actually very interesting. Really. OH. NO. I have not watched that episode of House because...well I just don't watch that. :P So it was really such a shock when I heard that they did an episode before that's close to the condition I set up for her. AND WOW. Y'all talk about this story? Haha. Wow. I'm so humbled, so shocked, so wow. Thanks for the support.

By the way, I saw the new trailers for the season 2 premiere, and can I say...WHOA?! I'm really looking forward to Chuck and Blair again. I can't wait. As for Serena... is it me or did she get a whole lot sluttier during the summer? (no offense of course, i love her too but Dan took a toll on her, I guess).

OH. People, help me decide on this, will you?

To all those who have read my other story, Forgiveness Someday, I'm thinking of discontinuing the story...

No. Not because I don't have time and stuff. I could definitely make time for it... I just... I SAW THE NEW PROMO TRAILERS... And I thought my story was just a tad too serious... :(

And besides, wasn't that GREAT cliffhanger? When Blair popped out of nowhere and she said that line? I'm scared if I make another chapter, I'll totally ruin EVERYTHING. :((

So help...

to continue or not continue...?

OH. Give your feedback regarding this chapter too. I've missed you all. And would love to hear from you all.

Criticisms are welcome but don't be too harsh though. :P It's a bit messy filled with run on sentences and other grammatical errors but Oh well...it's been a long while anyway.

anyway, hope you still all liked this chapter. hopefully i can update soon.

REVIEWS! THANKS! MWAHS! :D


	14. Chapter 14: Dangerous Blue Waters

**A/N: Alright guys, here it is! The next chapter! Again, thank you all for the wonderful reviews! I love you all!**

Please keep on reviewing, never stop, (haha) because I love hearing from all of you and your thoughts, etc.

Okay, shutting up and keeping the Author's note short (which is like a first) because I'm excited about this chapter. Wee!

Enjoy!

* * *

_She was flowing. _

…_Or falling? _

_She had no idea. All she knew was that she felt serene, at peace…like all the heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders._

_And it felt great. _

_To be away from the burden, away from the troubles, Georgina, the world…into a place where she…_

_Where exactly was she?_

_Clad in a flowing floor length dress, long blonde hair soft and light as a gentle wind breezed passed her beautiful face, blue eyes filled with confusion as she gazed at her surroundings…_

_Water? A lake! Or no?..._

_Blue…_

_Everything, everywhere was in shades of blue…black and blue…mostly blue…_

_She had no idea anymore._

_Blue eyes gazed up, high up to eternity. She couldn't see the sky. Even if she stretched her hand, her eyes, herself, she wouldn't be able to reach that light above all the black blue. Twirling, roaming, twisting…_

_Serene…peaceful...swirling..._

_Was she just getting dizzy or was everything around her moving?_

_Serena…_

_A name._

_Her name, she realized._

_She looked away from the light of far, far away and tried to find that soft voice calling her._

_Serena…_

_There it was again._

_She turned around, whipping her long blonde tresses as she did so, only to find that she was on the blue…standing on the dark blue waters…the lake._

_The voice._

_Serena…_

_She remembered Georgina, the old friend who was threatening to destroy everyone around her…Dan, Blair, Eric… and she felt afraid…_

_She didn't move or dare walk through the waters, afraid she might suddenly fall into the deep blue waters and drown with the image of Georgina invading her mind and all of her being._

_So she remained still on her spot._

_Because she didn't want to die that way. _

_The waters rippled gently around her and the wind continued its soft breeze against her flawless face._

_She inhaled the smell of nature, the smell of the sea…the smell of peace and serenity… _

_Where was she?_

_Serena…_

_Why was it everywhere peaceful she went, Georgina would always follow her? _

_I'm here, Serena…_

_But the voice wasn't like Georgie's. No malice. No plot. Simply just. So it piqued the blonde's curiosity._

_If it wasn't Georgina, who was calling her?_

_Who are you?_

_And Serena found she couldn't find a voice to raise in this odd, blue place. _

_Serena…_

_The waters rippled a little more roughly now, the waves splashing even more dangerously around her…Something was happening. The voice was getting stronger and Serena's heart began to pound as she felt the voice's face being revealed to her._

_Everything was spinning, twisting, twirling…_

_All of the blue…_

_And all Serena could do was stand on her spot on top of the waters and watch its magic dance around her._

_A glow emerged for out of nowhere. A beautiful light. And all of Serena's previous thoughts were completely washed out._

_She closed her eyes and reveled in it. She had never felt so much at peace._

_Don't fear for me._

_The voice breathed softly. It was close, so within her grasp that she had decided to open her eyes and see for herself who it was…_

_Blair?_

_Serena's heart swelled in relief. Her best friend was here with her, amidst the confusing, calming blue._

_Blair shined before her, a rare and gentle smile grazing her soft lips. There was a certain glow about her Serena couldn't define and a sadness in her eyes that Blair decided not to hide for now._

_It was a rare moment, for Blair to be like this. Open to her…completely being close to her…something was wrong...  
_

_What's wrong, B?_

_Blair was flowing, Serena realized. Her feet never touched the blue. The light was with her. Serena didn't understand...  
_

_A hand gently touched her cheek in comfort. _

_Comfort? Why would she need comfort? Serena wondered._

_What's going on? Where are we?_

_Blair just smiled, understanding but silent._

_Don't be afraid, S. I'll always be here with you…Even if you can't see me anymore…_

_What?_

_Serena didn't understand what Blair was saying. Serena could see her, so clear before her eyes, as clear as a bright sunny day in Manhattan.  
_

_Blair's eyes rolled down unexpected tears. Serena could only look up in wonderment and confusion._

_B?_

_I love you, S._

_Serena knew that tone. And then everything clicked. She understood the tears, the sadness, the comfort all of a sudden. It meant goodbyes._

_Why was Blair saying goodbye to her?_

_I love you too, B. She finally responded. And held onto her best friend's small hand._

_As if she was holding onto dear life._

_Blair leaned forward and gently kissed her forehead. Sadness and love all filled in her doe eyes. _

_Remember, that I'll always be here for you, okay?_

_And she began to move away._

_No!_

_Wait! What was happening? Serena panicked. The blue was taking over and the light was fading._

_Blair!_

_Don't go!_

_She had no voice once again. Overpowered by the blue. _

_Blair was fading, disappearing before her eyes. Serena did not want to be left alone. _

_Its okay, Serena._

_Blair!_

_Don't be afraid…_

_BLAIR!_

_She was gone. The light was gone. And the black and blue remained surrounding her._

_But she wasn't at peace now. Not anymore._

_Instead she felt cold and alone and scared. In denial. Confused. Lost._

_BLAIR! Serena desperately cried out. It was no use._

_She couldn't have that. She couldn't accept that.  
_

_BLAIR! COME BACK!_

_BLAIR!!_

She woke up with a start. The ringing alarm of her cell phone blowing her ears, throbbing her already aching head.

Her arms flailed tactlessly and a glass shattered somewhere beyond her. She tried to open her heavy eyes, trying to get in tune with the world once again.

_Hard wood. _Nope, she definitely wasn't at home in her own bed. Nor was she in the blue again.

With all the strength she could muster up, Serena finally pushed herself upward and tried to gauge at her surroundings.

She groaned in disgust.

She was in some cheap ass bar club, probably somewhere in Brooklyn. She had gotten so drunk she had passed out on the bar with nothing but a stool to hold her upright. She was surprised she didn't fall.

She paused and tangled her already tangled hair, trying to assess the situation and what she should do next. More like trying to mentally stop her painful hangover.

…which definitely was the most difficult task at the moment.

Her head felt like exploding!

Well she definitely didn't want to go home. Not like her mother would ever accept her in without asking questions and she couldn't deal with any of that now. In fact, come to think of it, she didn't want to leave this joint at all anymore.

_Could she live here?_

She could learn how to do the dishes or be a bartender or something. She didn't know. All she knew was that she didn't want to go back into her world where Georgina invaded it, destroying everything that walked her way.

So Serena remained seated.

Her thoughts turned back to her weird dream.

She didn't understand it at all. And she didn't like the feeling at all either. Because it felt so _real_. As if Blair was really trying to tell her goodbye…and something…_something else…_

It was in her strange, sad eyes, in her _I love you, S _speech, in the way her cold hand touched her cheek.

_Why would someone with so much light be so cold?_

Serena had to wonder as she paused all sorts of movements and touched her own cheek, as if Blair really had touched her seconds before.

_What was going on?_

The dream felt real. And frightening. And… Blair was leaving her.

She didn't want Blair to leave ever. Of course, she never once paused to think in the past that Blair didn't want Serena to leave ever either.

She shook her head wildly, shutting that thought away. When she was well and over this hangover, she'd visit her best friend and ask what's up. Maybe Blair was just having a problem and Serena just had to come save her again. That was her job.

_Saving the people she loved._

Her cell phone beside her blared to life as it rang its usual tone, it's volume twice as loud to her ears at such a time like this. Someone was calling. Serena wasn't in the mood. _Shit. _She wanted to make it shut up because it was annoying.

Her head still felt like exploding.

As she moved to grab it furiously, her hands froze in the nick of time as the voice mail came on.

_Serena. _The voice caller droned.

Serena choked on her drink as Georgina's sweetly distorted voice boomed through her phone.

_I've been calling for hours now. But you're not answering. And I'm getting impatient. You know how I am when I'm impatient. I thought we've talked about this? Well, no matter. It's alright. There are substitutes for you when you're not here. Can't wait to play again. I'll see you soon, S. You're gonna love this._

Serena's heart doubled as Georgina emphasized the word _love. _She felt she couldn't breathe right. What was she up to now? _Shit. _Serena wanted to cry. And all her plans of running to Blair in the morning have been ruined once again. _Shit. Shit. Shit! _She was hiding again. From Blair, from Dan, from everyone.

Serena was running away again. And if one day, Blair decided to leave her, Serena had no right to have a say in it. Maybe that's what the dream meant.

_Stupid spoiled bitch._ Serena cursed. And threw her phone away as if it was poison.

No. She'd remain here. She didn't care. She'd drink her cares away and dream of serenity and the blue. Not Blair. Because _that _Blair made her dreams scary. _No._

She grabbed another bottle of beer from the counter and carelessly drank it all in a gulp.

_Drinking and drinking and drinking…_

Drenched in the waters, lost in her sorrows…

She'd drown in the blue, she realized now.

And Serena didn't give a shit anymore.

She welcomed the blue with open arms to come and take her away.

* * *

_Waldorf Residence – The Morning After_

Blair Waldorf breathed in heavily as the morning rays began to hit her.

She stood outside her little balcony, gazing across the city as it slowly awoke to a new day.

New York was always beautiful and breathtaking in the morning. She'd briefly remember her sweet memory with Chuck when they had first watched the sunrise together on the hood of his limo and kissed once again after such long separation and cold wars had transpired between them.

She smiled to herself at the memory.

Blair glanced back to her bedroom just to check if Chuck's sleeping figure was still there and smiled, satisfied that he was still sprawled on her bed, blissfully sound asleep.

He was such an innocent boy when he wasn't trying.

She turned back gleefully to the city and the rising sun, when her smile slowly faded. She wanted to smack herself.

She had just gotten back with her boyfriend, they'd had great make up sex just hours ago and she knew she should be by his side right now, clinging onto his warm body and just peacefully sleeping beside him. _With him._

_God, she loved him._

She knew that now. And she knew he loved her too.

_I love you, Blair Waldorf..._

But Blair just couldn't bring herself to stay by his side and pretend that nothing was wrong with her, that nothing was bugging her and that nothing was troubling her _very _troubled mind.

Too much filled her head to make her sleep soundly beside him. Oh, how she wanted to. A night without any worries at _all _was another thing she desperately yearned for. But she couldn't have that. Not now. Not even with Chuck holding her close. _Especially _with Chuck holding her so close to him. She was afraid he'd just _know _without her having to say anything.

It was like she wasn't even allowed to be completely happy without having to worry about her little slight mis-condition.

He couldn't know. She'd decided firmly.

She'd been thinking about it the whole early morn she was awake.

She remembered him when his mother had died when he was young. He had locked himself in his own room, locked himself completely from the world. Living in darkness and barely eating. He was sick for days and never accepted anyone to go past his doors. Not even his best friend Nate…

Of course, being the young Blair that she was, she'd daringly defied him and walked into his doors as if she owned the stench-filled place.

There, he had let her into his world. Well, _she _let herself in. But the point was, she saw a glimpse of the real Charles Bass. And his world was such a dark, cold and heart-breaking place. Everything was in chaos.

Chuck had really loved his mother. And she had been taken away from him because of some rare cancer they both didn't completely understand back then.

Blair had taken care of him at the time.

Everyday, she'd _grudgingly_ come by after school and fix up the mess he created in his room, tell him stories about the latest bitch she clashed with or what her day had been like, regardless of whether he gave a shit or not, or force him to watch her favorite movies. Sometimes, when she was feeling nice about it, she'd let them watch _his _favorite movies. She'd care for his wounds and she had become his annoying personal nurse.

Basically, at the age of 9, she had been his constant company until he was ready to face the world again.

And when he finally brought himself out of his cold world, he had changed. _Completely. _

_Chuck Bass was born. _

Charles was gone, along with his dead mother.

He began to live dangerously, sleeping with Georgina first then sleeping with the rest of the world after. _Parties, booze, women._ Although, he made sure he never completely opened himself to others ever again, nor to ever show his true emotions to anyone at all.

_Except to her._

He had always been different with her.

He was always different with the people he cared for.

And now she was going to destroy him by placing her own grave beside his dead mother.

_Perfect. _

Blair was so caught up in her gloomy thoughts that she was startled when a pair of strong arms snaked their way around her thin waist and a delicate kiss was placed on her cheek.

"I see you've awakened."

Instantly, she relaxed and melted into his arms, closing her eyes as he planted morning kisses all over her.

And all her troubling thoughts just chucked out of her head. He had that effect on her.

She turned around and caught his lips.

"Don't you think you've had a little too much of lovemaking to last a week?" Blair inserted teasingly.

Chuck just smiled and pulled her closer to him. He had nothing but a sheet to cover him up and that seemed about to be gone in a few.

"I could never get enough of you."

Soon, her thin nightgown was on the floor before she knew it, along with his own sheet.

They kissed each other hungrily and groped at each other as if they hadn't done so the night before.

Chuck suddenly lifted her from the floor, erupting squeals from her and strapping her to him even more as made his way to lay her down on the bed.

"You have been very cruel leaving me alone in bed, Waldorf."

God, she loved it when he breathed her name.

The kisses and the groping and the clinging and the thrusting and the moaning didn't stop. Until they both reached their highest point of ecstasy.

_Oh yes…_

Chuck was very good at what he did.

Indeed, it was _such _a beautiful morning today.

The day that lay ahead would just get even better.

* * *

_The Palace – Late Night_

Chuck Bass entered his suite with spirits high in the air, he felt like was about to burst.

This was, by record, the happiest day of his life.

And he just couldn't keep that new goofy smile off his face!

He let his out-of-character moments slide for now. He was back together with his girlfriend and was just completely happy about it. _He loved her._ He _finally _told her that he _loved _her. And much to his surprise, she loved him back as well.

It seemed like such a fairytale, this whole _love thing._ Having someone love you as much as you loved them.

Chuck Bass was never one to be a cheesy, lovesick Humphrey, but he recognized these things, especially now that he was finally coming to terms with his own confusing feelings for Blair. He had always been afraid, had never wanted to commit himself to anyone but here was this doe-eyed girl he's known his whole life making him fall on his knees in the name of love… _for her. _

Things were starting to get clear now. _He loved her._ And suddenly, he felt like he could take on _anything_.

Chuck settled himself on his couch. And he sighed in blissful content, briefly thinking that it felt like he hadn't been in his own suite in ages. He'd been spending so much time with Blair, this was his only time back in his own private place.

He didn't mind leaving it for long days on end but there was always this sense of comfort whenever he'd step into his own private quarters after such a long absence.

Nothing could ever distort his territory no matter how cruel the world got outside of it.

That's how he always put it.

He leaned back further into his couch, letting its softness comfort his tired muscles - today had been filled with _strenuous _activities after all – and just quietly thought about his relationship with Blair. _His _Blair.

These days have been heaven and hell for the both of them. Heaven because they've finally reunited after all the shit they've put each other through in the past. Hell because of… that sudden breakup she initiated just the day before.

Again his mind was trying to connect the dots.

She had been acting weirdly lately. Being squeamish with him from time to time, suddenly dropping break up bombs on him and sometimes, givving him that sad, faraway look that he never could understand or put his finger into.

Something was obviously troubling her… He'd come to that conclusion one to many times already… _But what? _His mind screamed in frustration.

Until now, he still hadn't gotten that level over with.

And obviously, it was too much of a trouble enough for her to go to extremes and try to break it off with him completely.

If it weren't for Humpty-Dumpty's sister, they'd probably be still broken up, wallowing in their own miseries and possibly waging war against each other once again in the next two days or so.

He'd made a mental note that he'd have to thank Brooklyn's sis for this favor.

And then it clicked to him again.

Humphrey girl definitely knew something. _Or…_ she knew _everything. _What Blair was hiding, what was troubling her.

Jenny wouldn't have come to him if she didn't know anything.

Because she obviously wouldn't have given a shit about Blair after the stunt she pulled on her.

But that secret must've probably been big enough to move the social climbing bitch or she wouldn't have been brave enough to come to _him _of all people and plead Blair's case.

_Or at least a partial part of it._

He made a quick decision, he knew it could definitely jeopardize his newly made-up relationship with Blair, but he had to try to find a way to help her.

And how could he help her if he didn't even know what she was so desperately hiding from him?

Again, he was briefly reminded of how similar his girlfriend and stepsister were acting during the past few days. Desperately hiding secrets from their boyfriends and taking extreme measures just to keep everything hidden from them.

Chuck wondered if Serena knew anything about Blair.

He stood up, movements frantic, thoughts running all over his head and purpose in mind. He quickly grabbed his jacket and made himself to move to his door.

Coming from his peripheral vision, something caught his eye that made him cease all his movements.

He swiftly turned back.

He hadn't noticed it before when he first entered his suite. But he sure as hell remembered that he did not put anything like that _there._

He froze and all thoughts of Blair and heading off to Brooklyn or finding Serena temporarily flew away from his mind.

_Something was amiss…_

Because Chuck swore he did not leave that bottle of _tequila _with a _shot glass _by its side on _his _bar counter.

Scotch perhaps, would've have been understandable. That was after all the drink he was currently drowning in before he left this place for Blair's.

Well that was amiss now and in it's place was some bottle of tequila he only reserved for when he was having a party.

Alarm bells began ringing in his head.

_Someone was in his suite…_

He thought this place had the top-notch security in the whole world – an exaggeration, of course – but still top-notch enough to guard his privacy and his home.

He was _so_ going to fire a bunch of the Palace staff as soon as he found out who broke into his suite.

"Oh geez Bass, don't be so tense. It's so unbecoming of you."

The temperature seemed to have dropped a Fahrenheit down as soon as he heard the voice.

The voice he hated with his entire being. Him and a few others too, he added.

He slowly turned to face her, all defenses up, his face darkening, and his voice as sinister as hers.

"What the hell are you doing here, Georgina?"

_The real question was: How did she get in here?_

_Damn._ He was seriously going to do a lot of firing after he throws the bitch out of his room.

Georgina purred and inched closer to him. Chuck wanted to die right then and there. Or he wanted to push her away from him, wring her neck and throw her body out the window…or _something_…

"Aww Chuck, where's your fun?" And suddenly her hands were placed delicately on his shoulders and her face was so close to his. _Shit. _"You used to have a lot of those back then when we…"

And just when her cold lips were about to touch his, he roughly shoved her away, completely knocking her on the couch and accidentally knocking a couple of very expensive furniture as she went down hard.

Chuck Bass couldn't have cared less about the furniture though.

He was furious.

"Get out." He boomed menacingly. She was momentarily petrified by his unexpected actions and he gained even more power as he looked unemotionally at her terrified eyes. "Get out of my suite and get out of this town. You're not welcomed here. Leave Serena alone. Leave _me _alone and get_ out_. Or I swear to God, I will destroy you."

Instead of her running out as he imagined her to do right about this instant, she gave a loud, piercing shrill of a laugh.

This completely irked and annoyed Chuck all the more but he stood his ground as he watched the psycho before him laugh her lungs out as if he just told some sort of funny joke.

This wasn't _fucking _funny. And Chuck was _fucking _laughing.

"May I ask what is it you find so damn funny?"

After a few more annoying moments filled with _her _joyous laughter, she finally quieted down into a chilling silence and calmly stood up.

This sudden change in behavior completely baffled Chuck and more than ever he just wanted her out. _Now._

"Au contraire, _Chuck._" She hissed. "I think it is _I _who will be the one to destroy _you." _

She gave him the once over and smirked at him, as if this was some mere game to her.

"She hasn't told you yet, has she?"

Chuck understood immediately that _she _meant _Blair. _

Alarms were blaring all over his brain, deafening him.

"Stay away from her."

Georgina wasn't going to touch his girl, he'd make sure of that.

She just giggled in glee. _The absolute psycho._

"I can't believe it." She said shaking her head mockingly. "Snow White, the perfect, innocent, _honest_ girlfriend of yours didn't even bother to tell you, her _boyfriend, _her deepest darkest _secret." _

The siren kept ringing in his head. Georgina knew Blair's secret…whatever the hell it was.

_Georgina knew Blair's secret…_

_Holy Mother of - _

He tried to keep himself calm but this mere fact meant Blair was placed the most dangerous grounds without her even knowing it. He couldn't allow her to get hurt. He had to protect her.

Damn it. It seemed the whole world knew "_Blair's secret" _except him.

This upset him.

_Obviously. _

And Georgina knew too. And so she used it to her advantage.

"Blair Waldorf…" She droned one, taunting him. "The one and only girl who you have made yourself to _love…" _She spat out with disgust, turned her back on him and made her way to the counter, mindlessly pouring herself a drink as if she owned the place. She took a sip. "I'm sure she loves you as much as you do her." Another sip. "But then, I wonder, why is it that she hasn't trusted you enough with her big secret?"

Chuck's jaw clenched. He knew she was completely manipulating him, twisting his mind…He knew he shouldn't be buying whatever she was saying now but...

She made a point.

Why hadn't Blair trusted him enough with her secret? Why did he have to beg it off from someone else? Humphrey's sister, for that matter?

Georgina looked straight at his eyes, playfully, challenging. She shrugged as if nonchalant.

"Maybe she's just _scared_. You know? After that stunt you pulled, it's really hard to find trust after something like _that _happened." She chuckled delighted. "You are still, after all, _Chuck Bass."_

She said his name with such venom that it jolted sense in him, snapping him back to the real world.

"What do you want, Sparks?"

He was cutting down to the chase. If he was, so would she.

"Simple. _You." _

_What?!_

"Excuse me?" Did she just say what he thought she said?

Georgina put her drink aside and slowly moved closer to him again, careful and cautious this time around, but still playful and malicious.

"You heard me."

"Why the hell would I want you?" Chuck spat out distastefully. He'd rather hang himself, honestly.

"Here's what, you spend the night with me, I tell you Blair's secret. It's the _perfect _exchange."

When Chuck remained silent, she knew he was considering her little bribe.

"Aww…come on, Chuck. There is a reason why Blair would still keep up with secrets with you. She doesn't trust you. And with good reason. You can never really be _faithful. _You _abhor _commitment and _fear _it. You want_ this_. Sleeping around with a bunch of women from time to time. And even if your so called _love _would prevent you from doing so now, it's something you'd regret later on.

"I'm just trying to save you from a hell life such as that. I was always your _first. _And I'm here now to be your _salvation. Chuck Bass. I _made you. It's who you are. _Take it." _

And with that she slowly unbuttoned her jacket and needless to say, she wore nothing but a blue lace bra underneath it. Licking her lips seductively, knowing this was probably turning him on.

"Just the way you like it." She whispered sultrily.

And then, she kissed him.

Full on, tongues and all.

And he _responded. _

Georgina laughed inside as he fell perfectly into her little trap. Playing with Chuck Bass had always been such an easy thing.

It was _Chuck Bass_ we were talking about here anyway.

Too bad for Blair Waldorf. _Unfortunately._

She tried to rid him of the jacket he put on only minutes ago and sat him on his couch, climbing onto his lap, completely taking control.

She moaned as she continued kissing hungrily the lovesick fool completely wrapped around her little finger.

"Just like old times."

She was about to strip him off completely with his shirt when he momentarily stopped kissing her and moved to whisper in her ear.

"Yes, once a slut, always will be."

He didn't say with his usual sexy, seductive voice. He said it with so much cruelty that Georgina had to pull back and stare shock at the sudden turn of events.

_What was happening?_

"That's right. Put it on me like the _slut_ that you are." He smirked. "No wonder Serena had decided to shift gears these days. Probably got tired with the life _you _were leading her into. I wouldn't blame her, of course."

He knew he hit the right mark when he saw a flash of pain cross her eyes for a fraction of a second.

He didn't waste any more time. He mindlessly threw her off his lap so she landed on his floor _again_, got up, fixing his polo and made his way to open the door as if nothing had just happened between them.

He didn't say anything anymore, merely gestured with his hand to slowly make her way out, like some stewardess ushering their passengers out of the airplane.

Georgina's eyes flashed with anger and humiliation as she realized that _she _was the one who had just been played.

She couldn't believe it. The Chuck Bass had played _her. _And made her appear as if she was one of his whores that he picked up from some cheap-ass bar.

She grabbed her jacket at her side, swiftly put it on. stood up angrily and glared at him with so much hatred.

"How dare you. You are going to pay for this, Bass." She hissed. "Remember what I said about I will destroy _you." _She smirked evilly and made to walk out of the door. "Tell her precious girlfriend to start watching her back or rather, her _heart." _

That did it.

Chuck shoved her to the wall, his hands tightly wrapped around her neck, eyes blazed with so much darkness and anger. He could've killed her right now if he wanted to.

And by God, did he want to.

He was completely pissed right now.

"You. Stay. Away. From. _Blair." _He warned dangerously again. One more move and her neck would be broken.

Georgina didn't even seem fazed. But he knew she was terrified of his violent actions and so she made herself loosen around his heavy hand and inched closer to his face and whispered, "Fine. She wasn't really my target anyway. Just trying to have some fun."

After a long moment of staring at each other, challenging blue and brown eyes clashing with one another, Chuck finally released her, satisfied with her answer.

He didn't buy it, of course but knew she'd stay away. _For now._

Georgina brushed his hands away and patted her jacket as if dust had just clung to her.

She began to make her way out of his door, when she threw a parting statement to him over her shoulder.

"Perhaps Blair should be the one to explain the_ truth _to you, that is, if she'd ever bring herself to _trust _you completely."

And with that, Georgina f-ing Sparks was gone.

_Bitch._

Chuck slammed his door shut at her wake.

The happiest day in his life suddenly took a wrong turn and became the worst day of his life.

He walked over to his bar counter and brought out his favorite Scotch once again.

He thought about the things that Georgina said as he gulped a full glass in one second.

He couldn't hide it. He was worried. _Completely, utterly worried._

Blair was in so much trouble now and he realized the impact of that. Georgina knew everything about her and Georgina wasn't kidding around. And no matter how much he threatened her now, he knew she'd strike again soon.

He couldn't predict Georgina's next move and that was the problem.

_Damn it!_

This was Serena's fault. If she hadn't brought back that psychopath of an old friend, none of this would be happening.

Speaking of the blondie, where the hell has his step-sister been running to these days?

* * *

**A/N: **alright so that was chapter 14. another long chapter, i know. How am I doing so far?

Please don't kill me for that slight Chuck - Georgina action back there. I had to wonder. :p

please leave some reviews and comments. they're love.

OOh. I see tonight's UPDATE night or something... coz everyone else is updating their stories and that's just great. Thanks, will get to that later on coz i need some sleep right now.

Anyway hope you enjoyed so far.

I can't wait to the next chapter. :D So stay tuned for that.

thanks again for the reviews! love you all!


	15. Chapter 15: Dead Dead Dead

**A/N: **I swear I have been meaning to write. But a lot's been going on. I haven't had the time to properly sit down in my laptop and write down something decent.

Not to mention I'm still reeling from the first two episodes of GG! And now, _drools, _the third one is out!

I can't even believe that _all_ the shows are back! Finally normalcy has returned! I can finally breathe right again, lol.

GG Rants:

- Chuck makes me cry. I love him. And so does Blair, _obviously_. They make me cry.  
- Marcus is just…iono, whatever. His accent makes me gag, no offense to the fans. OhmyGod and he's uglier than Nate. Sorry.  
- I _adore_ Blair's comments, I swear. They just crack me up every time. She's the best ever. _Hail the Queen B! _  
- I DO NOT, for the life of me, understand what the hell is going on between Dan and Serena. I swear. I just _don't _get it.  
Someone please fill me in. _Please._  
- Is it just me or is Serena just pissing me off with her face every episode now? Iono, i just get ticked. It's annoying. No offense to the fans, it's a weird feeling.  
- Catherine is ugly… for a Duchess, I mean.  
- I feel sorry for Nate. No, seriously. I do.  
- I actually want him and V now. At least, she obviously likes him (still don't get what happened during the season finale with them btw but whatever). Go V. Love you.  
- And Jenny's still so user-friendly, despite her new do-over niceness.  
- Rufus is still H.O.T. I want to marry him.

LOL.

Okay so continuation below, story first, again sorry for the major lack of updates but here it is.

Enjoy!

* * *

The loud, harsh knocks that pounded on his door filled the silence of his entire suite. He jumped slightly, startled from his deep reverie and annoyed by this new disturbance.

He was actually holding onto a plan he just formulated in getting rid of Georgina _psycho _Sparks and he prided himself in having concocted such an ingenious idea. Blair would be so proud.

And now, the subject of his plans was now back banging on his doorstep, once again to torment him.

He wanted to ignore it. He did. But the pounding never ceased and the silence continued to grow thicker in his room as loud slams continued. He thought his eardrums would burst from such insane sounds.

Angrily, he gulped the last of his scotch, slammed the glass on his table – truly miraculous that it still didn't break after all the times he'd slammed it this evening – and stomped his way to his door, ready to commit cold murder and easily forgetting the finishing touches of his plan made merely moments ago.

Of course, tonight was filled with so many surprises and the person who stood outside his door was _not _at all the person he thought would be there.

He gaped in shock as he stared at her face, unbelieving that _she _had finally decided to grace them all with her presence.

And then the gaping ended and the ferocious anger returned.

"What the hell are you doing here?" He snapped.

_This was all her fault._

No way was she welcomed here.

"Chuck, please." A sob escaped from her lips.

He wanted to roll his eyes at his step-sister. But he didn't want to waste anymore time on her even to do that, and so he made himself slam the door instead.

Serena held it back with shocking force despite her weakling appearance.

"Chuck!" She yelled, frustration, desperation, determination, all in one. "Please, let me in. _Please._"

This time Chuck _did_ roll his eyes. _For the love of God._ He was extremely pissed off, if that wasn't obvious enough. But for reasons that were beyond him, he did silently give into her wishes after a long moment's pause, and he let her in, whilst still keeping that cold shoulder looming between the two of them.

Silence consumed the room again. Chuck let it. He wanted _her _to be the one to say something first. Anything at all, and then perhaps he could kick her out again.

He watched her every movement. He took in her appearance. She was an absolute wreck. Her used-to-be flowing, cascading blonde tresses were in tangles and completely out of their places; her entire appearance filled with dirt and grime all over. Tear streaks composed of her once flawless face and he could smell the huge scent of alcohol from where he stood. She was trembling, continuously pacing insanely and wrapping her arms around herself as if cold wind burst in from his closed windows.

Serena VanderWoodsen was the perfect epitome of a very lost, very crazed child right now.

And somehow, despite all that, Chuck Bass could not feel an ounce of sympathy for her. She had brought this upon herself after all. And now she's letting _everyone _else around her take the fall and Chuck Bass could not take this injustice anymore, especially since Blair was now involved in the dangerous game Georgina was playing.

"Chuck…" Serena timidly began.

Chuck interrupted rudely. "Again I ask, my dear _sister_, what the hell brings _you_ here? If you haven't noticed, you aren't welcomed here."

Serena flinched at his harsh tone. But she willed herself to compose herself and not break down in front of the jerk before her.

"I need your help."

Chuck almost laughed. This was just…too…too... Maybe he should wring her neck as well along with Sparks.

"Help? _Help?" _Chuck mocked back angrily. "Do you even _realize _what your actions have been doing to the people around you? How, suddenly, in your little game of 'let's-not-tell-the-world-my-secret' we _all _become involved a part of it?"

Serena's eyes widened as she protested desperately. "No! I didn't mean for you any of you to be a part of this. I thought keeping it locked up would keep everyone safe. I never wanted you to be a part of this…No one else was supposed to be…"

"Really?" Chuck lashed sarcastically. "Yeah, well, sorry to disappoint sis, apparently you don't wish hard enough, because now we are all a part of this!"

"Chuck…Please…"

"No." He gave her a hard stare. "Where have you been for the past few days? Running away again, are we?"

"You don't understand. _I had to! _I -_"_

"That's what you're good at, right? Leaving the people who care about you behind without bothering to think about the consequences. Great idea, sis. Two thumbs way up."

"Will you just list – "

"Do you even know what Georgina's up to now? Huh? Did you know that now her latest target in her little twisted version of Playhouse Disney is none other than _your best friend?" _

Serena froze completely at that, the cold building inside of her. Maybe her dream from last night wasn't so imaginative after all.

"What's happened to Blair?" Serena finally asked, swallowing the huge lump in her throat.

"Georgina didn't fill you in? I'm surprised." Chuck ranted on, still heavy on the sarcasm.

"Will you please just shut up and tell me what's going on?!" Serena yelled back.

Chuck sighed and considered her for a minute, taken aback by her sudden outburst. Perhaps it was unfair to blame this all on her. But because of whatever secret she was keeping, Georgina was wreaking havoc wherever she went.

"Georgina dropped by and announced her list of threats to me. _Blair _included. Apparently, she knows something about Blair that everyone else doesn't know and she's planning on using that to her advantage." Chuck explained in a breath.

"That must've been what Georgina meant in her cryptic text." Serena muttered to herself thoughtfully. Chuck heard this and his curiosity perked up.

"Do you know anything about Blair?"

Serena looked up, startled from her own thoughts. "Wha -? No. No. Blair hasn't said anything to me. I haven't seen her in awhile either. But Georgina came up with another one of her cryptic text messages earlier tonight and I just didn't know what to do anymore…That's why I came back. I had to find a way to stop all of this."

Chuck rolled his eyes. Oh well, at least he tried.

He sighed again, tired and completely drained. But he couldn't make himself rest. He had to get rid of Georgina and protect Blair, maybe do Serena a favor at the same time.

But he didn't know anything that was _truly _going on.

Too many things he didn't know. And how was he to do anything if he didn't _know _anything at all? It was only logical.

And since Blair wasn't here to tell him anything, he'd just have to settle with the main source of the problem.

"What's Georgina got on you?"

He watched as Serena blanched and almost faint at the question.

He had asked her this question before. And all he got was another snappy, 'I'm cutting you out' speech. This time he would allow no such thing.

He growled in frustration as Serena continued to stare at him in dead set fear, tears filling her blue eyes.

He needed to know something _now!_

"Serena," He began as he moved forward to his step sister. "I don't care what you did. Right now, that might be the only thing that could help us. I need to protect Blair. _You_ need to protect Blair."

Again, he asked grabbing her shoulders tightly, wanting to shake some sense out of her. "What has Georgina got on you?"

Serena didn't even bother to fight the tears. She just let it fall. She shook her head fiercely and muttered an, "I can't."

How could he make her understand?! Chuck thought frustrated. He tried again. "Georgina is going to do something to Blair that _I _can't fathom. I need to get rid of Georgina. But I don't know how if I don't know anything. Whatever I think of now would backfire because _she _has the upper hand." He was getting desperate enough to beg. "I _love _Blair, okay? So do you. Whatever you say now, it'll do. Just _please. _We're family. And so is Blair to you. Again, I ask, what has Georgina got on _you_?"

"I can't tell you. I can't tell anyone." Serena repeated again through choking tears.

"Serena…"

"If I tell you, you'd become a part of it. And you can't be a part of this."

"If you hadn't notice, we're _already_ a part of this without you saying anything at all!" Chuck retorted. And it was true; suddenly they were all pulled into a game they knew nothing about. "It's not fair that we end up suddenly falling on our asses without even knowing what's really going on here."

He tried again when she kept shaking her head. "Think of Blair…_please…"_

And she looked up at him, with the most sorrowful eyes he'd ever seen grace upon her features and he suddenly realized he was shivering from some unseen force that chilled him within. Something was extremely wrong in this picture.

He'd never seen that kind of look, those kinds of eyes on her face before. _What happened?_

And finally…

The bomb dropped.

"I killed someone."

_Holy Mother of God._

* * *

She couldn't sleep tonight and she didn't understand why.

Clad in her navy blue nightgown, she drank her glass of milk and quietly ate her cookies as she sat in her favorite couch.

Her Ipod was playing at a soothing level in her ear and she leaned back, letting herself relax. Nothing was going to happen tonight though, and her internal swarming of intestines were simply _nothing_ either. Perhaps it was something related to her poor health.

She swore she took her medications earlier tonight.

_Ding!_

She looked up, surprised and wondered who her late night guest would be.

It was practically past 2 in the morning, extremely late for a chitchat. Plus she wasn't in the mood for any late night chitchats. She was not feeling quite well this evening. Even if it was Chuck. _Maybe. Sort of. Yeah._

She smiled to herself at her slight confusion.

But then she completely scowled, immediately wished she could throw herself out the window the moment she saw who just entered her penthouse.

No. It wasn't even _Chuck_, God forbid.

She quickly shut off her Ipod and stood up, defenses high up, ready to kick the intruder out.

"Get out." She ordered.

Georgina smiled sweetly, completely ignoring the rude order. "Snow White, so glad I was able to catch you at such a late hour."

"That's great." Blair's voice flat with sarcasm. "I'm _not_. Get out."

Georgina just laughed out loud, putting an arm on Blair's shoulder as if they were friends. "Oh come on, B! Don't be such a killjoy."

"And don't you understand what _'get out' _means?" Blair snapped, shrugging Georgina's arm away. "Or do I have to drag you out of here?"

Georgina's smile finally wiped away and she just sighed, throwing her hands up in resignation. "Fine, fine. You don't need to be so uptight."

"Was there a _real _reason why you're here?" Blair asked. "Because I _really_ don't want to waste my time with the some desperate, no-life psychopath right now or anytime soon, really. Call Serena. Maybe she can accommodate you, unless of course if she finally realized you weren't worth any of her time at all." With that, Blair breezed past Georgina and made her way to her stairs.

Behind her, Georgina's eyes flashed with anger and hatred but she held herself. Tonight wasn't the night for that.

"Look," Georgina called out to the other brunette. "There is a reason why I came here."

Blair stopped, sighed and turned around meeting Georgina's gaze. "Georgina. I'm tired. And I'm sick, as you _unfortunately_ came to know. And I don't have time for this. What the hell do you want from me?"

Georgina's eyes lowered as she took a step forward to Blair. "Yeah, look. I'm sorry. About everything. I can't imagine what you must be going through." She paused. Blair just rolled her eyes, not buying her act but letting her have the floor, if only just to mock her. "Despite the things I've said, I was just playing around, not taking you seriously. But it is. And I'm just really _sorry_, B. I feel _so _bad for you. I _swear _I haven't told anyone. Your secret's safe with me."

Blair just furrowed her eyebrows as if she was seriously thinking about Georgina was saying and then bit back sarcastically in a sweet voice,

"Are you done yet?"

Georgina sighed, exasperated, daring to take more steps forward to Blair instead of being deterred. "I know you have a bad heart but I just can't take anymore. I have to tell you the _truth_."

Blair gave her the WTF look. "What?"

_What the f was this psycho going on about? _

Georgina made it close enough to Blair and sighed again, conflict filling her features. She looked down for a moment, debating whether to tell her or not and what would happened if she did tell or not.

Blair impatiently waited for Georgina to be out with it already.

Finally, Georgina made a decision and looked up at Blair, letting all her defenses down and opening herself up to the other brunette.

She sighed again, more tiredly this time.

And Blair's eyebrows truly furrowed in confusion now.

_What was going on?_

"There's something I have to tell you."

Blair's guard was still high up. But she was all ears. Whatever made Georgina act like this now, must be because of an important reason. She had never seen the bitch like this. Especially around her. And so Blair wondered.

Georgina caught on Blair's silent question and uttered the words in a slow pace.

"It's about Serena."

* * *

"So how's everything going?"

Dan looked up from his empty coffee mug at the sound of his best friend's voice. It seemed apparent that while other guys would be drinking alcohol to find resolution to their own complicated problems, Dan was drowning out his sorrows through _coffee_. Lots and lots of coffee.

It seemed like the perfect substitute.

At least to the soulful Lonely Boy.

"How's everything going?" Dan repeated, his eyes blinking in mockery. "Oh. Uhm, let's see. Girlfriend, _still _missing. Family members, _obviously _hiding something." He emphasized and exaggeratedly threw his hands up in the air. "My head is like…_spinning_…into oblivion. I think I'm going insane. Amidst all this, the question _'what is going on?' _still isn't answered." He relayed flatly.

Vanessa just nodded in sympathy, not knowing what else to say that could help him. She knew he'd pour his soul out in a minute or two, and all she could do was lend an ear and carry on serving him coffee just the way he liked it.

What was going on? Everything seemed to go topsy-turvy in the Upper East Side these days. Another reason to thank whatever god there was above that she was not apart of their world.

But Dan, albeit not a part of the world, somehow stumbled in it, and now he was hurting. _A lot. _

If there was god, she prayed Serena would just materialize out of nowhere, and then everything would be solved.

"I mean I'm so _tired _of all these secrets!" Dan groaned, frustrated. "It never _ever_ ends! And I don't get it. I just don't. Why can't we all just be more honest with each other anyway? The world would be _so_ much brighter if that be so."

"Haven't you ever thought that maybe it's because of the secret that Serena's missing now? Maybe she wanted to take some time off for herself and just think it all out. Give it some time." Vanessa reasoned out, even though she was only getting bits of the real story out of context clues.

Dan sighed tiredly, a look of pain and guilt crossing his face. "Yeah I know…" He murmured. "I _know_… I just wished she could've at least told me that… Is that _too_ much to ask?"

Right then, Nate Archibald made his way inside the café. Both Dan and Vanessa turned to unexpected presence.

"Oh." Vanessa uttered. "Look. It's the man who never calls. What can I get you?"

"I'm really sorry about that." Nate immediately said. "It's just a lot's going on right now, with the family and all."

"Here, here." Dan raised his hand up in agreement. Nate turned to his direction.

"Hey, man. Are you okay?"

"Yeah if you call the _numerous _amount of secrets piling up at every turn you go and your own _girlfriend _doesn't bother telling you where she is enough to make you go insane with worry," Dan paused for dramatic effect. "Yeah. I'm good. You?"

Nate gave a tight smile in return at the sarcasm and silently took a seat beside him.

Vanessa, though weirded out with the situation happening before her eyes, was sympathetic enough to both the problematic boys.

_Story of my life._

"I'll go get some more coffee." She stuttered and left them alone to do her tasks.

Looks like it was going to be a long night.

And to think, the night was still young at that rate.

* * *

Blair impatiently waited for Georgina to sputter it out already. Whatever _it _was.

When it became clear that Georgina wasn't going to utter anything without Blair saying anything _first_, Blair snapped.

"_What_? What about Serena?"

"I didn't want to believe it at first when she told me a few days earlier. I can't believe it… I couldn't." Georgina rambled on.

"What? What did Serena tell you? What's it got to do with me?"

"Everything."

Now Blair was truly concerned for her best friend. For days now, Serena had been missing, off to God knows where. And she had just been so caught up in Chuck-mess that she hadn't really noticed Serena anymore. She should've paid more attention. Because of her selfishness and lack of concern, Serena had to turn to a psychopathic stalker for someone to talk to.

Blair had to refrain from gagging in disgust.

"What is it?" Blair asked. "Tell me."

Georgina gave her a long look, conflict crossing all her features again. Finally, after another long moment of painful silence, Georgina said in quiet voice,

"Serena slept with Chuck."

_What?_

Blair scoffed out loud.

"Excuse me?"

Blair wanted to smack herself for almost falling for another one of Georgina's tricks. _Stupid._

Serena was missing. Because of the bitch who stood before her. And Chuck…well she trusted Chuck. He would never do that to her. And if he would sleep with someone else, he wouldn't sleep with her best friend. He just wouldn't. He could do any other horrible thing imaginable to her but he would _never _do _that._

Plus, she spent the whole day with Chuck today.

"Okay. You know what? I've been lenient. I've been nice to let you stay in my property for _this _long. But I don't believe you. Now, the door is right over there. Please leave before I am forced to call the authorities." In short, if Blair wasn't so viciously polite, she would've just 'Fuck you, now get out.'

That said, Blair made herself turn away from Georgina, completely dismissing her.

"No!" Georgina grabbed Blair's arm, forcing her to face her again. She wouldn't allow _this _bitch to dismiss her just like _that._ "I'm not lying to you! I swear it's the truth. I can prove it to you."

"Really."

"If you come with me right now, I can prove it to you. I swear."

Blair shook her head in absolute disgust. "And why would I go with you? You probably might just bring me to some warehouse and tie me up somewhere. I don't trust you, G. Now _leave. _I mean it."

"Because when you and Chuck broke up, Serena had been there in his suite."

Blair froze.

How the hell did Georgina know that? Only Jenny knew of the breakup and Jenny didn't know who Georgina was. Gossip Girl didn't know of their breakup and so there was no other way for someone like Georgina to know.

"How did you know that Chuck and I broke up?"

Georgina's features softened in understanding. "Serena told me. Chuck had been so upset that day. Serena had been there. Something happened. It was an accident. But she regrets it. She came to me after. She couldn't face you, not after what she did. How else would I have known?"

No. Blair didn't want to believe it. Chuck would never do that to her. Chuck wasn't Nate.

It simply wasn't possible. There was something wrong.

But then, they _had_ broken up. She had broken it off with him. And Chuck had been so angry at her for what she did. _Anything_ could've happened. Serena must've come at the wrong time. And Chuck could've -_ would've -_ done anything.

_No. _She _couldn't_ believe it.

Serena wouldn't ever do that to her ever again. No. It wasn't possible. This was absurd.

_Damn Georgina._

"So why bother telling this to me?" Blair asked suspiciously. "You don't care about me. In fact, this would seem good news to you. Why are you here now, betraying your _only _friend?"

"Maybe I just want to get back at her for hurting me." Georgina hissed, her features darkening. After a moment, she softened and shrugged, confused. "Or maybe I just want to change my life. I don't know. Whatever it is, I'm here now." She rambled on. "It's like the same thing again last year. When Serena slept with Nate, Serena came to _me _right after they finished doing the dirty and told me everything. And now here it is again. I love Serena. But enough is enough. It's different now. If any other circumstance, I _would've _just laughed this off but...you've got a weak heart now... And it's just _differen_t now..."

"You're lying."

"I'm not." Georgina bore her cerulean eyes into Blair's brown ones, daring her to believe that there was some truth instilled there somehow. "Come with me."

Blair didn't want to believe it.

_She couldn't. _

She didn't.

But the bitch was being so sure right now. Eye to eye with much conviction, Georgina faced Blair, telling her that she could prove it to her _right now. _

How would the bitch prove it?

No. She couldn't. She couldn't fall for this. It might be another one of her old traps. And Blair would discover herself that whatever it is Georgina concocted would be just a lie one too late. She had to be smart.

But her head was failing and her emotions were getting tangled up. And she realized she was afraid.

What if Georgina was saying now was true?

She couldn't afford to be lied at. Not again. Not this second time around. Even if it was _Chuck, _who she loved with all her being... she couldn't go down that road again.

She had to be sure.

And if what Georgina said was false, then Blair could just go along her merry little way, have Georgina arrested and everything would be normal again. For everyone.

Either way, she'd know the truth. Whatever it was.

Blair was confident that Georgina was lying and Chuck would never hurt her by sleeping with her best friend.

She just had to see for herself and prove Georgina wrong.

And that was how Blair found herself all dressed up and ready to go after a span of 20 minutes.

Georgina was wrong.

Chuck would never do that to her.

Chuck loved her. He said so himself.

Angry or not, he'd _never_ do that. Or else, he would've done that a long time ago.

It was unreasonable. It was _impossible._

Not to mention, they'd be committing a disgusting portrayal of incest.

_No. _She had faith in Chuck. He'd never do anything like that to her. He knew what she'd been through when Nate slept with Serena last year. No. He couldn't do it to her, whether they broke up or not. He couldn't.

_Never. Ever. Ever.  
_

At least that's what Blair kept repeating in her head during the whole way going there.

* * *

"What?"

Chuck Bass had never been more stunned in his life than he was now.

Exclude all the moments he'd ever had with Blair though.

Surely, he'd heard wrong.

_Yeah. _There was something wrong with his ear. He couldn't have heard right. He couldn't. It simply wasn't possible in this lifetime that Serena VanderWoodsen could ever commit cold _murder_.

Sure, she may have been deemed a bad girl in the past but she could never really harm anyone. Not intentionally. Not like _that_. Serena didn't have the heart to do something as cruel as that. What reason did she have to do so anyway?

And so whatever he heard escape from Serena's lips was simply laughable; a horrible joke that should never be told again.

But Serena's trembling form and her unrelenting sobs were the very living proofs that everything that she had just uttered to him moments ago were ringing true.

That it was all a _reality._

It was becoming so painful to him and his eardrums as her words kept repeating in his brain.

When had they begun to plunge into the deepest depths of hell? Chuck wondered. At one point in their lives, they all have made one too many wrong choices and took one too many wrong turns… Now...Here he bore witness to one who was finally caught up in the mistakes she created for herself.

And suffering painfully for it.

_It wasn't fair._

He watched as his step sister writhed in pain before him and he couldn't bear to look anymore. He had to turn away. He couldn't take it, couldn't accept it.

For if she could be doomed to such a horror, so could the rest of them.

And the _real _truth was they already were; sunk in their deep shits and hells. They just _chose _to not acknowledge it.

"I didn't mean for it to happen…" Serena whispered, repeatedly. Over and over and over again, it was enough to drive him to the brink of insanity.

He wanted to shut her out, throw her out, cut her out. He really hated her for invoking another strange emotion within him.

_Compassion. _

Like love, he never understood that word. Until now.

He didn't like this emotion at all. It made him feel vulnerable as well, made him open to the world, made him prone to damage, made him think of _his _wrong turns and choices in this God forsaken life.

_Damn them all to hell._

She had _murdered_ someone. And he could only give his own understanding even without her explaining herself to him.

He wanted to push her away from him, for she was too close and if she came any closer, he'd find himself drowning in her sorrows and her burdens.

Get away from me. He silently commanded her.

But instead, for reasons beyond him, he found himself wrapping his arms around his blonde step sister. His _family. _Suffering from such a terrible secret, a terrible past. It was all finally catching up on her and he figured she needed someone to bear the burden with.

He found himself willing to offer that without hesitation.

And he didn't understand _why _that was so.

It that was the only thing he could do to help her.

That or he just could finish off Georgina forever.

He decided the latter would be far more beneficial to Serena but for now, he held her; _comforting, no judgements. _

He didn't how long he had been holding Serena but it was moment too long that could never be taken back again.

He had no idea how his door could've opened without him or Serena even realizing it, but perhaps they were too caught up in their own shaking, tragic thoughts.

"Oh my effing God."

The words were uttered in a slow, deliberate way. Filled with astonishing shock and undeniable hurt. All in one.

The voice didn't belong to Serena.

Both step siblings snapped out of embrace and turned to the intruder.

And Chuck's eyes filled with horror when he saw who it was.

"Blair, it's not what you think – "

"Don't waste your time explaining, Chuck." Blair spat hurt and anger filling her voice. "I know what I saw."

He moved forward towards her, away from Serena, trying to make Blair see reason. _Shit._ What just happened?

"No! I was just trying to – " But Blair cut him off.

"Like I said, I don't want to hear it."

Serena intervened, wiping her dirty tears. "Blair, he was just trying to help. This isn't what it looks like."

But Blair's vision was clouded with the image of Chuck, her boyfriend, the man who just confessed his love for her merely 24 hours ago, and her best friend, the beautiful blonde who captured everyone's attention with one wink also the bitch who slept with her ex-boyfriend the year before, caught in an intimate embrace in the confines of his old suite.

Blair felt the painful tugging of her heart. Just a few more and she could potentially collapse before them.

She deliberately ignored it, fought the terrible disease within. She had more dignity than that. She wouldn't cry. She wouldn't die. Not in front of the _traitors_ that stood before her now.

"Help? _Help? _With what?!" Blair screamed at her face. "With how to get your bra off? Yeah, looks like he's doing a great job with that."

"No!" Serena argued back. "It's not like that!"

"Then what is it like?" Blair challenged. "What are you doing here in the first place?"

This shut up Serena. Because if she gave anything away, she'd have to tell her secret for the second time around. And she didn't want to. She didn't want Blair to know. She didn't want her to know her true self.

When Serena stopped responding, Blair took it as affirmation to her thoughts.

Extreme hurt filled her eyes and another painful tug struck her weak heart. Ignoring it, she began nodding her head, her face awash with clarity.

"You really had me fooled. Congratulations. You _won_." She spat at Serena. "But I guess I shouldn't have expected anything less from you. I mean after the first time with Nate, I should've remembered that you are a _slut _and always will be, no matter what you do!"

"Blair – "

She rudely dismissed her and faced Chuck who had what she misinterpreted as a guilt stricken face. "I can't believe I was stupid enough to _trust _you again. Trust you enough to give my heart to you!"

"Blair, I meant everything I said!" Chuck fought back, grasping her arms. Desperation and fear slithered within his insides. "_I love you!"_

"No!" Blair roughly shoved herself away from him in absolute disgust and hurt. She didn't realize her tears had begun to fall. She didn't care. "You don't know what _love _is. You don't know how to _love! _You're nothing but a low life. A _monster_. You have _no _heart, Chuck!" She burst out, deliberately hurting him and succeeding in doing so.

She took a step back, grasping her chest as she seethed in pain, tears streaming like waterfalls. Of course, they merely interpreted this action as an emotional pain, not physical.

_No, _she told herself as she fought internally. She wasn't going to collapse before them. She took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down.

"I can't believe she was right."

Serena and Chuck's features contorted into a look of confusion at that last line. That didn't seem to fit in the picture.

_Who's she?_

It didn't take long for them to find out. For the _she _in question had stepped out from the shadows just a little behind Blair with an almost _frightened _expression in her features at having to bare witness to the terrible scene playing before her.

"Blair." She said timidly as she approached them whilst fiddling with her hands in dramatic nervousness.

But Chuck and Serena knew better.

The dots immediately connected in their heads. Serena finally understood what Georgina's cryptic text was all about a little too late. Chuck finally realized that Georgina won in this time around. Brilliant, unexpected, completely well thought of.

_Mother fu – _

"Blair." Chuck began, anger beginning to consume him again. "You can't possibly believe _her."_

"I didn't." Blair retorted, surprising both of them. "_You _made me believe her when I saw you intimately wrapped around my _best friend_. You have nothing to say for yourselves."

Serena interceded again, giving Georgina glares filled with extreme hatred. "I swear, B. There is _nothing _going on between me and Chuck! Okay?!" Serena's voice heightened, the past weeks stress taking over her. "_She _has been planning this the whole time! I would _never _do this to you again!"

A long silent pause.

"Wouldn't you?" Blair practically whispered, her eyes completely fixed on her best friend. Serena shook her head fervently in denial.

Maybe this wasn't really about her and Chuck. Maybe it really was more about her and Serena.

"Blair, please believe me…" Serena begged.

Georgina slowly averted her eyes and quietly added. "I should go… This isn't what I had planned."

Serena swiftly turned to her, furious than ever. "No, I think this is _exactly _what you had planned all along! Ruin Chuck and Blair while destroying my friendship with my best friend!"

"I don't know what you're talking about S." Georgina denied. "I was just concerned for Blair." She passed Blair a knowing look that did not go unnoticed to Chuck. "She's going through so much now, and I just had to tell her what you've been doing behind her back… She deserves that…"

"At least someone had the courtesy to tell _me_ the truth." Blair added accusingly.

Serena snapped. _Completely. _Reason flew out of her mind as she suddenly lunged towards Georgina.

"You manipulative, _psycho _bitch!" Serena screamed, trying to make a punch at Georgina.

She would've been successful if Chuck hadn't withheld her.

Serena shoved out of Chuck's arms and turned to Blair, yelling. "She's _lying _to you! She's been planning this the whole time!"

"I didn't mean to get in between you two." Georgina said apologetically to Chuck and Blair, completely ignoring Serena's rants. Chuck just laughed sarcastically from where he stood, completely not buying her act.

"I'm so sorry, B." She gave another meaningful look at Blair. "Maybe if you told him what's going on with you then this probably wouldn't have happened…"

"Told me what?" Chuck asked pointedly, not missing anything.

"Nothing." Blair hissed in reply. "And frankly, that's none of your business. I should've known that _this,_" She pointed out to her and Chuck in disgust, "could never have worked. I stand by to what I said a long time ago. _Everything _between us has been nothing but a _mistake. _Why? Because you can't be trusted." Another tear. Another step back. Accusingly, she chokingly added to Serena, "You are no longer my best friend. Stay away from me."

"Goodbye, Chuck Bass. I hope you and my whore of a best friend enjoy the rest of your lives in hell. You're perfect for each other."

And with that Blair ran out of the room, not stopping for the life of her and tears streaming like a faucet even more now. She drowned out the cries of the people she left behind in the room, still calling her name and telling her to come back.

Georgina, however, remained.

Serena was still panting from her earlier burst of emotions, waiting for Georgina to show her true face. Chuck waited as well, getting ready to throw her out his glass windows.

After another moment's pause, Georgina finally did drop the act and smirked cruelly, victorious for the evening.

"Hmm. I must say, I'm impressed. That was one heck of a show."

Serena refrained from ripping her hair out that moment.

"I could kill you now."

Georgina simply laughed evilly. "Yes, but then, you'd end up in jail."

"I don't care!" Serena yelled. "At least, you'd be gone and it would all be worth it."

"Ah Serena, my _blonde_ friend." Georgina mocked sweetly, teasingly laughing. "Don't you see? I _won. _Even if I did die, it wouldn't change the fact that you would never regain your best friend again..." She turned to Chuck. "…and how she'll never love you ever again." Her features darkened. "I told you not to mess with me. Next time, heed my warnings well."

And that's when Chuck hit her.

A hard, full on punch that caused her face to meet his floor.

Serena couldn't believe what just happened.

"You're going to pay for this." Chuck simply whispered in a deadly tone. "You will."

Georgina reeled from the pain for a moment. And then she tossed her hair as if there had been no pain and simply laughed out loud, slowly getting up as she did so. "Dear, I don't think you should be worrying about _me_. Clock's ticking, honey. You're running out of time."

"Will you just shut up with the riddles already?! What are you talking about?" Serena demanded.

Georgina just smiled mysteriously, _maliciously, _deadly_. _Her eyes twinkled in evil glee. Chuck didn't like that look. It meant this wasn't over yet.

"Oh, you'll see."

She finally decided to begin walking out the way she came in.

"I'll give you a clue though." She paused at the opened door frame and said over her shoulder. "Maybe you should follow where Blair's headed off to right_ now. _Never know what could happen to a poor, _broken-hearted _girl during a time like this._" _

And Georgina Sparks laughed as she disappeared from their lives for the evening, carrying nothing but victory in her wake.

It wasn't even over yet.

* * *

"Stop here."

Blair ordered, practically choking on her tears, to the cab driver she had hailed hurriedly earlier.

She stumbled out the car, losing her balance and almost falling head first on the cement.

Everything was a blur.

But she could still make out where she had brought herself into.

_The Communitea. _

The coffee shop just around the corner of the Humphrey loft. Because if Serena could manage to sleep with _her _boyfriends, then so could she.

To hell with her weak heart and her building reputation and her moral values and virgin reputation. She was tossing that all away now.

She roughly wiped her tears away and composed herself before she finally began to march towards the entrance of the tea joint.

She could already see her purpose from the outside already, thanks to the massive transparent windows and all.

_Him with an unexpected companion._

Her heart raced in fear at the sight of her ex, but she ignored it. She'd ignored him. He was just another reminder of how much love would always betray her in the end and how much her best friend was a whore.

"Waldorf."

The sound of her name came from neither of the guys, but from Vanessa, who saw her entering the premises looking like an absolute mess enough to make her almost drop the two servings of coffee she held delicately on a tray.

It did get the attention of the two men seated on the stools.

Blair ignored the confused looks at her presence and continued stomping with fast, angry steps to Dan Humphrey.

When she stood in front of him, his face couldn't have been any more shocked or confused or weirded out.

He had absolutely no idea why this girl was here in front of him now. What did she want now?

So he voiced that thought out.

"Blair, what are you – "

He didn't get to finish that sentence.

Because she _kissed _him.

Nate could just stare jawed dropped, completely shocked out of his wits and his eyeballs popping out at the scene transpiring before him.

_Blair Waldorf _just kissed _Dan Humphrey._

_Was kissing._

_Kissing._

_Oh. my. effing. God._

And just a little beyond them, the shatter of cups and glasses could be heard all throughout the little cafe.

_Holy Shit._

* * *

**A/N: **okay... I think I just screwed everything up. Iono how to fix this. Oh well. Lol. haha. Just kidding.

The editing of this chapter took longer than expected. I watched GG and One Tree Hill and all and it still wasn't done.

**OMG. OMG. OMG.**

**THEY USED HIS BRITISH ACCENT! THEY USED HIS BRITISH ACCENT! OMG. I COULD DIE NOW! OMG. ED. OMG. I CANT BREATHE. OMG. OMG. HELP ME!!  
**

I seriously **died **in that one line!!

_"Blow out your candle."_

faints

stupid MARCUS. WTF. get out of the show already! lol.

- N/V was great actually. Really. I must commend them. But he kept treating her like how he treated Blair, always giving excuses, always saying this and that and shit. That was just really annoying on Nate's part. That's the one big thing I've always hated about him. Worst part of it all is that this time, he really likes V.

- N/B was hilarious. They're better that way. Not romantically involved but playing games with each other. Not that Nate could ever keep up with the program...but that's the fun of it all.

- Catherine is still ugly.

- Marcus is still ugly. Compare the two blondes (N/M), Nate is hands down so much more better looking than this British freak. Long live Ed Westwick's British accent.

- Oh Eleanor! I have missed you so. Ugh. Great. Jenny's gonna suck up again, I can already _fucking _see it. Bitch.

- Last thing, I was watching the CW11 and Jessica Schzor (Vanessa, however the hell you spell her last name) and she made me hate Vanessa all over again with this one liner that _extremely _upset me (regarding her character and her interests, whatever).

_Bitch._

Watch it if you want. CW11, Jessica Sch-whatever. iono how to spell her last name. It's probably in youtube or whatever. Ugh. I'm so upset.

ANYWAY.

READ AND REVIEW. Tell me your thoughts. Love it? Hate it? TOO much? Too whatever? Too un-fixable?

**P.S.** 5 - 6 more chapters more and Hope Remains will be coming to an end. Forgiveness Someday will no longer continue. lol. (wanna make a new story).


	16. Chapter 16: Simple Misunderstandings

**A/N: **Okay so the previous chapter kinda sucked… Prolly because I totally forced it all in one (oh, the impatience of me but AAH. I just had to chunk it all down in one chapter and stop wasting time already). I swear there was a point to all that…. (I guess lol). No, seriously. There was. :p I think. Oh, bah. I have no idea.

But I'm still happy coz there were like still a lot of people who loved it, so it's like a 50/50 thing. Plus I thrive on criticism and honesty. So I'm still so grateful.

Thanks for the reviews! Love you all!

By the way, I know I'm so behind the rest of the technological world but I have to say that I'm starting to get the hang of livejournal.  
It's fun.  
I can't believe I only started this now.

God, at 18, I am an old hag who has no knowledge about basic internet. Lol.

Anyway, here's the next chapter.  
Enjoy!

* * *

This really wasn't going the way she planned it.

Not that it was a coherent plan, but whatever.

Last year, when Serena slept with Nate, she imagined it to be absolutely explosive and mind blowing enough that it had sent her supposed best friend running away because said ex boyfriend kept coming back for more.

She pictured there had been fireworks and all.

_Ugh._

In short, Serena had this _annoying_ ability of being able to fulfill every boy's darkest fantasies, be he sex crazed or not.

Blair had been wanting to do something like that, not that it would ever change the events of tonight but only because it would show Serena and the rest of the world that she could do it as well.

_Fulfill every boy's darkest fantasies with a single fiery, explosive kiss kiss._

However, as Blair's lips desperately clung on to Dan's, she could feel no fireworks whatsoever. Nor could she feel anything romantic about any of this.

Quite the opposite actually.

She felt like she was trapped in some smelly fish boat with moss filled wood paneled floors and slimy, greasy wet rails all over.

Nothing explosive or fiery or even _sexual_ about it.

Just extremely horrifyingly _disgusting._

She felt like she'd go bulimic all over him and just throw up in his mouth right then and there.

And she probably would've if the moment carried on a second longer.

That would definitely add to the smelly fish boat she was imaging in her head. _Yuck._

Thank goodness _he_ was the one who snapped back to reality and shoved her roughly away from him, a horrified expression on his face and yelping a frantic, "What the _hell _has gotten into you, Waldorf?!"

The bile caught in her throat was momentarily distracting her and so she did not respond with a snappy comeback as she normally would.

"I'm sorry," Dan clipped sarcastically. "Should I call the mental asylum?"

Blair shot him icy death glares that made him back down instantly. "You're right. I don't know what I was thinking, coming here thinking I could seduce you and actually _enjoy _it." She shook her head furiously in disgust, already wishing the memory away.

Nate chipped in at the wrong moment. "Why are you even doing this? Thought that ruining my friendship with Chuck wasn't enough that you had to go ruin your own?"

That did it.

That just _fucking _did it.

She marched up to him filled with angry tears and slapped him _hard_, again surprising the rest of the onlookers.

Every time she saw Nate lately, that was what she seemed to be doing to him.

"I'll have you know," She spat, choking on her forcibly withheld tears. "That _Serena _ruined _our _friendship_ again_ by sleeping with _my _boyfriend _again." _She was practically yelling at Nate by now.

Nate backed down, instant regret and shock changing his features at the unexpected proclamation.

At Dan's dumbstruck look, she continued lashing out her anger. "Yes, Cedric! Serena's secretly _fucking _her own step brother, Chuck _Bass._" She hissed his name in bitter anger. "And _I_ was unfortunate enough to actually walk in on them almost getting it on."

Dan felt like his mind had frozen. Nothing seemed to processing in his system well that moment.

But he heard the words, he…

"No." Shaking his head, denying it, he rambled on, "Serena would never do that. Serena's out of town. Serena hates Chuck."

Blair snorted. "Yeah, thought so too."

There was a quiet moment as the quartet faced each other, each caught in their own worlds and contemplating their own thoughts regarding the bomb Blair just dropped on them.

Nate's entire being was filled with pity and regret at lashing out at Blair like that without even considering her side again. He had hurt her again and he felt bad in doing so.

Vanessa was completely dumbfounded by this sudden turn of events. She was furious as well. She had thought Serena was someone better than most of the Upper East Side, or at least someone who was _trying_ to be better. Apparently, from what she'd seen and heard just now, she was absolutely wrong.

Dan was just… _jelly._ His brain had melted while Blair was kissing him earlier and now, he found himself unable to move or think or act at whatever everyone was saying around him. He just could_ not_ believe it.

And Blair… suddenly she was _so_ tired. In the quiet moment that ensued, all the images that she wanted to stay buried began erupting in her mind.

She wanted to shut them all out.

"I was a fool." She whispered. Everyone jolted out of their worlds, focusing their attention on her. "I was stupid enough that he could change. Just _a little_. Sleeping with someone else, much more, the best friend, is that so hard _not_ to do? I should've known…" She sighed, the first black spots beginning to cloud her vision. She felt so…_tired. _

She could feel everyone's hearts break at her broken rant. She didn't need that. She didn't need their pity.

"I don't care. I'm not going to cry." Blair spat just as brokenly, though she was trying desperately to be strong. And to think she considered even _loving _him? Chuck Bass? Who had she been kidding? She wasn't thinking straight anymore. This whole time she had been a complete waste of space, no longer the Queen B everyone knew.

She was completely and utterly destroyed beyond repair.

"I am _not _going to cry." Blair repeated with more force this time as she continued gazing into the space.

Nate wanted to shake her, unable to stand this broken version of a Blair he had never seen before currently facing him now.

Finally, she let her eyes bore into all of them. They all flinched, wishing to turn away from her empty stare. For once, they truly became afraid of her and what she had become – _was _becoming -.

"I don't need your pity."

She was gone after that.

Like the wind had blown her away and she was out of sight, out of mind from them.

And they were left rooted at the spot, unable to know what to do or where to go next.

How do you deal with things like this anyway?

* * *

Serena stared numbly at her laptop screen.

She hadn't been able to get any sleep anymore. No matter how tired she got, nothing could get her eyes to shut down.

So many terrible things had gone wrong.

A simple misunderstanding ruined two relationships in less than five friggin minutes. The damage was beyond repair and she swore she'd commit another murder again if that would be the only thing that would keep her from feeling any pain.

One thing kept her from doing that though.

The information her screen was currently flashing to her face was not properly registering in her brain. She reread it over and over and over again, hoping some kind of understanding would hit her hard and she could finally know what action to take next.

So they hadn't been able to find Blair the night before as Georgina had expected they would.

At least, something didn't go right in her plans,_ thank God_.

She and Chuck had spilt up after, thinking it best if they weren't together when they faced Blair, just in case she would think things again.

Serena had headed straight for Blair's home and Chuck…well, he searched the entire New York for her. Serena hadn't heard from him since.

Of course, when the elevator doors dinged signaling her entrance to the Waldorf penthouse, Blair had not been lounging about on the couches. Not that Blair would do so after such a traumatic evening.

So Serena had decided to take the stairs and head straight for her room, wondering if she'd find Blair slumped over her toilet bowl once again.

Her heart clenched at that image, knowing that _she _had been the cause of her best friend's lethal actions.

She sucked it up though, her fear and her painful heart. It wouldn't do any good anyway.

She'd save Blair again like she always did, even if Blair didn't want her to right now.

Luckily, the gods spared her this time and Blair was not slumped over her toilet bowl. In fact, Blair was nowhere in sight.

Blair had not returned home.

Discovering this, instead of leaving immediately as anyone else in a frantic search would've done, Serena remained in the confines of her best friend's bathroom, unable to stir away from it anymore.

She didn't make herself bulimic, no. Of course not.

She just leaned against the cold marble walls and collapsed down, burying her face in her knees and... _cried._

_Sobbed her heart's misery away.  
_

And here she thought she had run out of tears.

Her life was completely destroyed. The life she had been working so hard to rebuild over the past year had completely crumbled down before her eyes. She said she would fight for it but she hadn't. She had been too afraid.

And now, regret and anguish took over her, painful images and memories tagging along with them.

But she was grateful to Blair's bathroom and for once, she finally understood Blair's need to throw out the contents of her stomach every single time something terrible got to her.

Here, no one could touch her. Here, she could finally be by herself without anyone from the outside barging in, and rocking her world once again with threats and lies and scandals and simple misunderstandings.

Here, she was _safe._

She could be quiet and be alone here.

Serena didn't know how many minutes or hours she remained huddled on Blair's bathroom floors but Blair still didn't come and for that, she was slightly grateful.

Her tears had finally dried out and she let her head rest against the cold walls, numb by now and absolutely drained. She didn't seem to have enough energy to even bother standing up again.

She wished she could lock herself away in here forever.

_Was that how Blair felt every time she was in here?_

Her eyes lazily roamed around the pristine bathroom, as if she could find some answers written there.

That's when she saw it.

She blinked, unsure of what she was seeing. Her curiosity got to her and soon, she found herself getting up from her spot. She slowly began making her way to what caught her eye's attention, enough to make her forget her eternal misery for moment.

It wasn't anything threatening, no. She could hold them at the palm of her hand and examine them carefully.

And that's what made her confused. Why they were so many and why they were even_ here_, in Blair's bathroom.

It was so out of the ordinary. Things like this weren't supposed to be around people like Blair.

_Pills._

Lots and lots of pills bottled in. All of them different from each other. And if there was something doubled, Serena assumed it was just for stock.

For a moment, Serena panicked. When had her best friend become a drug addict? Did Chuck know about this? How come she hadn't noticed?

Her frantic questioning came to an abrupt halt when she saw the prescription papers neatly posted on the left side of the huge mirror, reminding Blair when it would be the best time to take her medications.

There was even an added post-it on top of the reminders.

_For a healthy lifestyle, do not forget to take. _

Smiley face at the end.

And for the nth time this evening, Serena's world collapsed.

How come she had not noticed this before? The moment she had entered Blair's bathroom, Serena had not seen these trivial, out of the ordinary things.

What was going on with Blair? Serena had no idea. _What was wrong with her?_

Why were there so many prescribed pills for her?

And not just the usual over the counter drugs you can avail of at some mere pharmacy.

_Oh God. Oh God._

Serena's heart escalated as she grabbed a couple of bottles, making sure the ones she picked had another stock so that Blair wouldn't think she ran out or something…

Her hands were shaking as she did this little task, stealing belongings from her best friend and desperately trying to shove them in her bag.

She finally accomplished her task, making sure nothing looked suspicious - not that it mattered because Blair would figure it out anyway – and with panicked haste, she ran out of Blair's room, practically stumbling down the stairs and into the elevator doors.

She ran a total of 3 blocks away from Blair's building before she finally decided to hail a cab.

Not once did she look back.

And now, Serena sat in her room, staring straight into her laptop, the bottled pills she stole earlier at its side. She glared at them as if they were poison.

Two different kinds of medication that she stole from Blair. There were more but Serena had been in a panicked hurry and so she couldn't steal everything. She was fine with what she had now. She was able to find out what each medication was for.

Serena had come to discover that they weren't so far off from each other either.

One of them – _cardiac glycosides – _was said to increase the force of cardiac contraction. She got that down. But confusion and disbelief still plagued her mind.

Blah, blah, blah, most of the medical stuff described was beyond Serena's comprehension. She did however scroll down and read carefully the side effects of taking the medications and what kind of sickness it tried to treat.

_Slows the heart rate…fatigue…delirium…anorexia…Used to treat congestive heart failure…the heart failing as a pump…the heart…the heart...failing...  
_

Serena slammed her laptop shut, unable to take it anymore.

She didn't stop the tears as they sprung out of nowhere.

_Oh God…why? Why did this have to happen?_

She asked over and over again, burying her wet face in her hands.

Of all the people that should've been suffering from terrible things like this, why did it have to be Blair, _her _best friend, _her _sister, who she seemed to keep betraying over and over again?

And didn't Blair have bulimia? What happened to _that_? Serena highly doubted they healed away so quickly, considering the number of times she had caught her best friend throwing up.

Her mind was in state-shock, her entire being completely paralyzed except for the tears that kept coming.

_Why?_

That was only thing she allowed her brain to think.

She couldn't…couldn't accept it at _all _that Blair was...was going to… she couldn't even _say it. _

_No. _This was some terrible nightmare she had to wake up from. She pinched herself hard, hoping everything that she had just discovered would be a horrible dream.

_It wasn't. It was reality._

Because Serena would rather lose Blair's friendship over a stupid misunderstanding than losing her _completely _because of _that. _

_Like how Chuck lost his mother…like how normal people lose the people they love...  
_

Of all the people in the world, she had always considered herself the 'lucky' one. She was Serena _fucking _VanderWoodsen, for Christ's sake! And she had never experienced the idea of losing someone through…_death…_

She simply wasn't like those kinds of people. She was rich and lucky, protected from the evils of the world.

Words like death didn't go right with people like her.

Was this her ultimate punishment for accidentally taking a life? That she lose the life of someone she cared for?

_What have I done?_

So caught up in her agony, she did not notice the knock on her door.

Until it began pounding loud enough to break her out of her paralyzed state.

"It's open." She called out numbly.

"Busy?"

She instantly whirled her chair at the voice, sudden relief coursing through her.

_Dan…_

A glimmer of hope seized her heart.

She jumped up and ran towards him, enveloping him in a tight hug. She needed him so much_ now_. Only Dan could make her feel better and at ease. And so she clung to him desperately wishing his warmth would make this all go away.

It didn't.

Instead it just got worse.

Realizing that Dan wasn't wrapping his arms around her like she expected, she slowly untangled herself and looked at him, confused.

"Dan? What's wrong?"

He had such a serious face. It meant that whatever he had to say now was something important. _Did something happen?_ Serena wondered, concern instantly filling her, despite her traumatic state.

"I don't know how to say this…" Dan began. Serena just got more confused.

"What is it?"

He tried to find the right words to say. He tried not stumble on his words because he had to be clear, in order for him to understand things as well.

"What's happening?" Dan decided to just go on straight forward with it.

Serena avoided his eyes, dread filling her. "Dan…" She whispered, hoping he wouldn't continue with his line of interrogation.

He blatantly ignored her. "Something is going on. And I just want to be let on to what _it_ is."

"It's hard to explain."

The line just infuriated him even more.

"Well, let me make it easier for you." He sighed angrily. "I know you're keeping something from me. And I'm _sick _of being the only one you don't talk to about it."

"I'm not talking to anyone." She pleaded desperately.

His frustration was slowly pouring out with each word he uttered. "Oh, really?" He asked pointedly. "Then why did Blair suddenly decide to show up early morning at the café, _completely_ destroyed, trying to seduce me to get revenge on you for sleeping with Chuck?!" He said all in one breath. It was a miracle he wasn't showing any difficulty in breathing.

Hurt and desperation coursed through Serena. "Blair came to you?"

"What was she talking about?" Dan continued, absolute seriousness in his tone and face. It frightened her to the core. "Serena… what did she mean?"

She couldn't look at him, couldn't let her eyes meet his anymore. Because if she did, she knew that she'd just blurt spill everything out.

And then he would never love her ever again.

When she didn't respond anymore, Dan's heart crushed. But he didn't break before her. He still wanted to know the truth.

"Was it true? Did you sleep with Chuck?"

"No, Dan! I didn't!" Serena yelled out, giving him at least that.

"Then what was Blair was talking about last night? About walking in on you two? What was going on? What was that about?"

The questions didn't stop coming. Worst of it all, what used to be a voice filled with concern and care was no longer there. All that remained was a scary, serious interrogating man who she did not recognize.

"I don't know." Serena answered stupidly. Hurt flashed through Dan's eyes but she didn't see it because she wasn't even looking at him.

He gulped, trying to keep the tears at bay. He asked again. "Did something happen last night?"

Serena really, really wanted to just blurt out everything. How Chuck was just helping her, and Georgina somehow dragged Blair in and caught them in an embrace… why all that _crap _was happening in the first place…

She really wanted to tell him.

But she couldn't.

"Please, don't." She begged.

"Is that what you're so afraid to tell me?" Dan ignored once again her pleas. "That you _cheated _on me?"

Serena found herself unable to breathe. How did the conversation stir this way? She could feel Dan completely detaching himself from her, slowly… but she felt it.

_It hurt._

By now, she was looking at him in the eye. Her eyes were watery and so were his but none attempting to let them fall.

"Did you cheat on me last night?"

_How had it come to this? _She wondered.

How had their relationship come so far apart from the trust and love they had once shared?

_Oh. Right._ _She_ had started lying to him.

But still, he _knew _who she was. He knew that she would _never _do anything like that to him, much less with _Chuck. _

How could he _not _know that she wasn't like that? That she would never deliberately hurt her best friend like that? _Not again._

Didn't Dan believe in who she really was? _Didn't he know? _

Wasn't that one of the reasons he loved her? Because she cared deeply for a selfish, snotty, rich girl who seemingly had no heart towards the outside world and she loved that girl, she loved Blair. Blair was her sister. Her other half. How can Dan think that she would actually do that to her own _sister_?

Why would he think like that?

_Didn't he know her at all?_

The hurt that coursed her heart was unbearable and she felt as if _she _was the one with the heart condition instead of Blair.

"All I need is a yes or a no." Dan spat. "Did you sleep with somebody else, whether it was Chuck or not?"

If that's what he wanted to believe…

She wouldn't stop it anymore. She wouldn't defend herself because she knew he wouldn't believe her anyway. _Did he believe her at all?_

She had to lie again. Even if it would kill her to do so again.

But she sucked it up.

"Yes."

She had never wanted to die anymore more so than now.

"Yes." She lied again, repeating it. She couldn't look at him. And she confirmed the untruth. "Yeah."

Dan stared back at her in disbelief and disgust. He thought… he…

But she did.

And… "I'm done." He said with finality. He couldn't believe that either.

So he repeated. "I'm _done_."

He didn't want to linger anymore, he couldn't breathe standing before her, so he abruptly turned and walked away from her, from her and her life. He wanted nothing to do with her anymore.

He had loved someone he didn't know who really was to begin with.

Serena was left standing there, numb, paralyzed once more for the nth time in her life.

She couldn't even _cry _anymore.

She had just lost Dan _forever_.

Yet she still stupidly thought that her lies were far better than him knowing the truth.

She'd rather have him think she was doing that than him knowing what she really did, what had _really _happened.

Sleeping with your best friend's boyfriend was a lot better than murder right?

_Right?_

If that was so, then why did she wish more than ever that she die that very instant?

* * *

He was worried. _So fucking worried._

He had been running all over town trying to find her and still, _nothing. _He hadn't heard from Serena either.

He tried calling; no answer. He decided not to waste anymore time.

Sleep evaded him. At this rate, the thought of sleep did not exist to him. All he could think of doing now was to find Blair and explain _everything_.

That it was all a simple misunderstanding, that it was all Georgina's _stupid _plot to ruin Serena. Hell, he'd even tell Blair why he had been holding his step sister like that. He didn't care whether Serena wanted it secret or not.

_To fucking hell with her secret._

If it was going to destroy everyone around her, then he might as well be out with it.

Because _no, _he didn't want to lose Blair for the millionth time in this lifetime. _Fuck it all._

School had been the last option.

He just knew he'd see her today. If not, then he could skip class then head to her home, knowing she wouldn't be anywhere else.

How long could a person hide anyway?

Besides, if he had to find her at the ends of the _fucking _world, he'd gladly do so. If only to explain the _truth _and have her back again in his arms, where she _belonged._

And at last, Chuck Bass spotted the brown curls that he loved so much. He had never felt more relief than he did now.

He was glad she was okay, at least. Safe and sound. No harm upon her.

Chuck practically ran his way to her. It felt like forever, like unseen force was slowing him down. He fought it.

He had to get to her.

_He had to.  
_

Unfortunately, someone else stepped in and completely caught him off guard.

He was found himself reeling as someone whirled him around roughly and punched him hard on the face.

_Nate._

Fuck. He didn't have time for this.

But unlike the last time this happened, he punched back if only to release his own anger towards Georgina and every _shitty _thing happening around him.

"What the hell is your problem?!" Chuck yelled, finally realizing the Nate was actually going to kill him.

_WTF. _After practically months and months of no word, he suddenly decides to go on another round of 'Beat the Crap out of Chuck' especially on a day he wasn't fucking up to it? No _fucking _way was Chuck going to let Nate beat the hell out of him without him fighting back this time around.

Nate punched him first before he yelled his own reply, "What the hell is _your_ problem?!"

They were jabbing at it with the whole school looking on at them. Shock filled gasps and eyes filled the entire court yard but no one dared to stop them.

They would've killed each other right then and there and no one could seem to be bent on trying to stop the commotion.

Except one.

"Stop!" She cried. "Stop it!"

Everyone watched, mouths agape, as she ran desperately to the fighting duo.

Nate had the upper hand then and slammed Chuck to the wall hard. "I thought you cared for Blair?" He spat out sarcastically. "Isn't that what you said last time we were at this?!"

"I do care about her! Much more than you ever could!"

Another punch.

"Then why the hell did you _hurt _her and sleep with _Serena?!"_

Another set of gasps and whispers began echoing all around them. The two ex-best friends ignored it, too caught up in their own world.

Chuck was finally able to gather his strength and roughly shove Nate away from his throat. Chuck spat out blood and caught his breath before he yelled out, "I did not fucking sleep with Serena! Okay?! And last time I checked, this wasn't any of your business anymore!"

God, he wanted to kill him. _What the hell?_

"It is if Blair comes running to Brooklyn completely broken because of what you did!" Nate retorted angrily, wiping the blood from his nose.

Chuck was momentarily caught off guard by that new information.

"Will you two just stop it?!"

Blair materialized out of nowhere and now stood in between them, panting from the running and yelling.

"Blair." They both said in unison, their attention completely on her.

"Stop it." She ordered, more calmly this time.

Nate was infuriating though. "I should've known that whatever relationship you two would be having would end up like this. This is _Chuck _we're talking about after all."

Chuck blew up, pissed. "For the last time, I didn't _fucking _sleep with Serena!"

Nate scoffed. "Please. Haven't you lied enough?"

This time it was Chuck who threw himself at Nate, murder in his eyes, starting the fight all over again.

"Stop it!" Blair repeated frantically, courageous enough to go in between them, trying to keep them apart. They were too strong for her but she didn't let that fact deter her.

She didn't whose fist it was, but all she knew was that she ended up yelping and hitting the cold hard cement with a painful thud.

She almost rendered herself unconscious as the black spots began hitting her vision.

The fight came to an abrupt halt and both men rushed to her hurt form on the ground and tried to help her up, muttering their apologies at having accidentally hurting her, whilst blaming each other for hurting her.

She pushed them away, and practically stumbled again as she tried to stand her ground.

"Enough!" She yelled at them, trying to regain balance. She was panting heavily, unable to see them clearly due to the black spots.

"This has gone far enough!" She furiously turned to Nate. "Nate, this isn't your business. I don't need your help and I don't need your pity!" And then she faced Chuck, just as angrily. "Leave me alone. Never come near me again. Because whatever you say now, it doesn't matter because I won't believe you ever again!"

Hurt flashed in Chuck's eyes but she didn't see that as already turned away and began walking away from them both, slowly and cautiously from the two speechless men of her life.

Her clique had then approached her and surrounded themselves around her, trying to help her walk.

Both Chuck and Nate watched as they carefully led Blair away.

When they were completely out of it, Nate spat blood again.

"While you're at it, stay away from _me_ too."

And he coldly walked away.

"Gladly." Chuck retorted bitterly.

And yet, he could still feel the cold awash him.

He couldn't believe this scene was happening again except this time around, Blair had been here to bear witness to it.

He finally registered the people still sharing shock-eyed at him and he wanted to murder them all to hell since he wasn't able to do so with Nate.

He couldn't go to school anymore.

"Show's over!" He yelled at them, dismissing the entire student body. He angrily got into his limo, slamming the door shut as he did so.

Second _fucking_ time he had another show down with Nate in front of the whole school. _What-the-fucking-ever._

He'd just have to find some other way to talk to Blair. _Soon, _he noted.

For now, he'd spend some time calming down and trying to compose himself.

* * *

She walked the school corridors looking like a zombie, ready to destroy anyone who dared crossed her path.

Everyone stepped aside for Serena VanderWoodsen the moment they took a good glimpse of her face.

That or they all heard about the guy who she completely bitched out earlier when he didn't make way for her. Serena _doesn't _bitch out. _At least not lately._

Serena wasn't in the mood to do a question and answer portion anytime soon. And everybody got the message just by looking at her zombie looking, forlorn appearance.

They all had a feeling that her inner Queen B would just come out. They could not be caught off guard, not if they wanted to continue living in peace.

At least the content that filled Gossip Girl's recent post.

Serena had skipped all her classes this day and really had no plans on attending anything. But despite this, she had heard about the fight between Chuck and Nate earlier through Gossip Girl. But she wasn't here for that. She had only decided to _drop _by because she had this one purpose in mind.

A purpose she could not waste anymore time for.

_Oh God. That sounded so wrong..._

Luck was with her though, because the moment she rounded the corner, she practically bumped into the very person she was looking for.

That person sighed frustrated at the rude blockage, scowling as she looked up to see Serena blocking her view.

"Serena."

A venomous hiss.

"Blair."

The two girls stared down each other. Another

Passer bys had to stop momentarily as they noticed the two Queens face off each other in the hallway. But they couldn't stare for long because they all caught on Serena's zombie, murderous glare that made them scurry away and tell all their friends what was happening.

Blair let Serena have her moment before she dripped icily, "Don't you have someone else's boyfriend to do on the list? Let's not keep them waiting." She shooed the blonde aside with a hand. "Now if you'll _excuse _me."

Blair tried to breeze past her _ex-_best friend, wanting to have nothing more to do with her but said ex BFF completely blocked her from going on where she wanted to. She tried to move the other way, but Serena continued to block her.

Blair took a step back and sighed, trying to compose herself. She was annoyed and didn't want to deal with this but she found no need to make a scene in front of the whole school like how Chuck and Nate disgustingly displayed themselves out.

_No. _She was not flattered that two of the closest men fought stupidly for her. _Far from it._

She gave Serena a cold once over. "You're looking a bit rough around the edges. _My _boyfriend didn't satisfy your needs well?" She feigned a thoughtful expression. "Oh, that's right. It's ex boy –"

"That's not why I'm here." Serena cut her off, a rough expression casting her features.

Blair's features darkened in return. _How dare she? Who the hell did she think she was?_

But before Blair could say anything else, Serena quickly brought out the little contents that were previously hidden in her bag.

"Care to explain?"

Blair backed down instantly at the sight of _her _medications in the hands of her devious ex-best friend.

Serena carefully watched Blair's expression as she shoved the pills in her face. Blair didn't let it on but Serena could see her swallowing the knot caught in her throat and the fear slowly contracting in her eyes.

She knew that expression well.

"Where did you get that?" Blair slowly asked, dread creeping into her.

Serena gave a tight smile. "I was looking for you last night. I dropped by your home and this is what I stumbled into."

Blair fiercely grabbed the pills out of Serena's reach and hissed, "What the hell do you think you're doing stealing my things? My boyfriends not enough for you to steal?"

Serena wanted to _fucking _shake her.

"I didn't sleep with Chuck, okay?" Serena retorted exasperatedly. "I didn't! I swear! Georgina made it seem as if that was what it looked like because she wants to ruin me, and she just dragged you and Chuck and Dan and _everyone else _in to do that."

Blair just gave her an unreadable expression. Serena was afraid because she didn't know what Blair was thinking anymore. She hated that look.

"What's going on, B? What's happening to you?" She took a step forward, trying to connect to Blair, trying to make her see the truth: She loved her and she was her sister and anything Blair was going through now, she would go through with her.

_Yeah. How very hypocritical of you, S. _

She shook that annoying voice out of her head and instead, focused on talking to Blair. "Blair… please… Tell me."

"Okay then." Blair agreed lightly. Serena paused, knowing her best friend didn't take things lightly and knew there was a catch.

"Then can you tell me the reason _why _Chuck was holding you last night?"

Serena gulped. All her plans were crashing down. She had thought if she did this publicly then Blair would be cornered and forced to have a sit down with her to make her shut up. The plan seemed hard if _she _too had a secret she didn't want anyone knowing.

_God. _Serena realized with horror.They _really _were best friends _through and through._

Blair got the message at Serena's silence and smiled coldly. In a sweet faux voice she said,

"See? Not so easy isn't it, S?"

She lost. Who the fuck was she kidding? This was _Blair_ she was talking to. She'd_ always_ lose against her when it came to things like this. Last year's incident at the Ostroff Center should have been reminder enough.

She let Blair pass her, the cold taking over her entire being once again. For the second time that day, she was left paralyzed by another person who she loved.

Blair stopped and threw over her shoulder to Serena,

"And if it wasn't so obvious to you, your invitation to the Waldorf penthouse has officially expired. Don't ever come near me or my house _again_."

Serena stood rigidly as another person walked out of her life.

* * *

Chuck Bass sat in his usual place in his suite, nursing his terrible wounds and bruises and cursing all over the place.

_Fucking day._

On one hand, he had the ice pack on his left eye. On the other, he held his trusty cell phone, speed dialing Blair at every minute possible.

It kept leading him to voice mail all day and he was getting extremely desperate every time it did so.

But he wasn't going to give up because he wasn't like that.

_Perseverance. _

That was the word that kept him going on today.

_He couldn't lose her. _He just _fucking _couldn't.

He wanted Blair back and he was going to do so, no matter _what_.

He wasn't going to let them _break up _again because of a stupid _misunderstanding _Georgina concocted and happened to be _lucky _enough to have it work.

_Bitch._

An idea suddenly inspired him that very moment and he immediately ended the hopeless call to Blair.

He'd try again later.

Right now, he had other fish to fry.

He dialed another number and was pleased to hear the other line ringing, signaling the availability of the person he was trying to contact.

The ringing was beginning to burn his ear but he impatiently waited for someone to pick up while he rolled his eyes, annoyed and bored already.

_How hard was it to pick up the phone these days, really?_

Finally, after an eternity of rings, a connection was made.

Chuck took in the voice on the other line, nodding as if the person on the line sat before him. He threw the ice pack away.

"Mr. Sparks. It's Chuck Bass. I'm sure you remember me…" He laughed pleasantly as he listened more to the rants on the other line. He made sure to mention his father's name from time to time. Always works like a charm. Got people scrambling to do his bidding.

"My father mentioned you the other day during dinner and I heard you were having trouble over a lost daughter…?" He drawled on, pausing for a dramatic effect.

Chuck smiled maliciously as he carried listening to the distress of the old man on the phone.

"I am sorry for your troubles...It must be _so_ hard..."

They talked a little more so, Chuck sharing his ideas and offering his help, appearing to be the _perfect_ young Bass-tard that he was. If Blair were here now, she'd completely scoff at his antics.

And that was why he was finally doing this. This would've been better if he was doing this with Blair. But no. Fucking Georgina had to ruin that as well. Blair wasn't here by his side, plotting with him and somebody had to pay for it.

"It's no problem at all." Chuck offered, once again. "I'd be glad to offer all the help I can give."

The connection ended.

He calmly slid his phone aside, idly wondering if he should attempt to call Blair again.

He decided after awhile that he'd try again a little later on.

Chuck wanted to reflect upon his perfect idea. Georgina wasn't the only one who could play. It was time to put his cards on his deck.

And for fuck's sake, he had better be lucky enough as well to make his plan work. He had to be as lucky as she had been.

He suddenly scoffed, realizing he didn't luck. His plan with push through, no matter what.

Or else, he'd have to go with option C and commit murder.

Either way, some bitch was going down soon.

* * *

**A/N: **So I portray this (& maybe the next chapter) as like an exaggerated version of 'Woman on the Verge', especially the Serena parts.

And yeah, i know I kinda portrayed her a sad, annoying dumb dumb here. But what can i say? Her face is pissing me off and I just want to make her life miserable..._for now. _Lol.

God, I'm so evil. _Whatever._

But I swear. AAH. Serena (on the show) is driving me insane with just one look on her face. I DO NOT get it. sobs She's ticking me off so much i can't stand it. I dont even understand why! Rawr.

Honestly, I know I've been putting off the whole telling Chuck thing. It's just... I'm just trying to avoid making everyone cry... (coz most of you all say you tear up, cry, etc etc. And of course i feel guilty about that.) haha. But yeah. Okay. Haha.

Thanks for all your support!

Reviews please. :) Thanks mucho! hugs


	17. Chapter 17: So Sick

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews, thank you! They all just keep popping out of nowhere, I'm still shocked. The support is fantastic!  
**

I'm sorry I've made like half of you all cry. I swear I didn't mean to. Oh well, that's drama.

Like how Chuck totally made me cry with his little confession to Dan. My heart goes out to him.

Can't wait till the next episode! October 13 is far too long.  
Enjoy the chapter!

* * *

_The time glass was nearing its end. _

_Her end, at least._

She could feel it. Her time was nearing. She didn't think, she just knew.

The Waldorf penthouse was still. Silent. Empty. _Motionless._

To most, such silence would be found disturbing. No one ever engulfs themselves in such kinds of silence.

Today was different though.

And besides, Blair Waldorf wasn't just some other person anyway.

She didn't find the silence or the emptiness of her house eerie or lonesome. In fact, she found it quite gratifying. For once, she was truly grateful that her mother was forever stationed somewhere in Europe due to a business deal and Dorota, off to some strenuous errand that it would probably take her all day to get back. In this moment, she could bring everything to herself and lay down all the cards. In her quiet, she was able to reflect about deeper things without having anyone to disturb her.

This moment gave her the power to pretend as if time has stopped for her. It was only rational, despite the insane notions it brought to any normal person. Because if time has stopped, then she wouldn't have the need to die so soon.

_To die._

What would it be like? _Death._ She wondered curiously, despite the gnawing fear seeping within her all being. Slowly crawling, infecting her with its disease. She could feel it. She could feel _everything. _It was coming.

She blatantly ignored the ticking clock behind her.

That ruined the silence.

And it made her admit to herself that she was truly afraid of the reality she was caught in. Honestly, she didn't want to die. Honestly, she wanted to stay in this cold, glamorous world, whatever it took. Honestly, she wanted to be like everyone else, to have the ability to fill their lives and pursue their dreams. Honestly, maybe she wanted to spend the rest of her life with Chuck too, because he was a part of her dreams now. And honestly, she didn't really believe Chuck and Serena would ever hook up, despite Georgina's claims. That was just seemed like the perfect excuse to get them _both _out of her life and away from the pain she knew she'd instill in them if they stayed with her.

She willed herself not to cry, because it was pointless.

Just like how it would be pointless to have the surgery. She'd just die in it anyway. _Pointless. _

A waste of precious time.

Why not live the rest of her short life outside the confines of a dreary, miserable hospital? She didn't want to go like that. She was happy out here.

The melancholy thoughts that she let herself to think now were not unfamiliar. For the past week, the gripping thoughts lingered in the back of her mind. Serena's stealing of her pills did not exactly affect her as it should've had. She knew that these many medications were losing their effect on her. The realization came to her only a couple of days back.

Lately, she'd wake up in the middle of the night, troubled and scared, gasping for air. Sometimes, it would get worse to the point that she couldn't even sleep properly anymore, all because she couldn't breathe right. She'd have to sleep upright, so her breathing won't constrict. Her chest pains kept getting worse, its attack unpredictable and uncontrollable, despite her medications. Her ankles would suddenly hurt unexplainably in the middle of the day; the simple task of walking would be difficult to do.

She never walked to school anymore.

Although she didn't purge as much anymore and despite, the healthy diet she tried to keep these days, it simply wasn't enough. Extreme nausea would strike her from out of nowhere and she'd just have to vomit. One time, she had to excuse herself in class.

She had never purged in school – a dangerous public place – before.

And now, here she was.

Her life slowly being taken away from her. Nothing was within her control anymore. She clouded herself in the silence, willing for time to truly stop for her.

Until the elevators dinged.

She turned, wondering who the disturber of her peace was this time.

She almost dropped dead right then and there at the sight of her intruder.

"Blair."

Her heart trembled.

"What are you doing here?" As if nothing was really going on with her. She was still the cold Ice Queen as ever.

"I miss you."

Blair turned away, rejecting him. She didn't need this right now. Her mind was resolved. No more distractions. He had to be out of her life completely.

And that was the way it was meant to be.

"Chuck. Please leave."

She didn't respond nor reject his sentiments. This dared him to take a step forward, closer to her. "No."

"Chuck." Her tone was warning. _Damn._ She hated him. Why did he always have to be so hard-headed?

_Right. He was __Chuck Bass. _

Suddenly, she was trapped in his arms and finding herself finding difficultly in breathing again. Her heart doubled. And her stomach omitted funny, tingly things. _Shit._

"_No._" He said forcefully, holding her tightly to him. "I _miss _you."

She feared she'd collapse in his arms. Due to her condition or the unknown emotions he invoked in her, she didn't know.

"I don't."

His face moved even closer to hers, never breaking his intensive stare. "Stop lying."

She tried to push him away, but he was too strong for her. He held her even tighter and leaned in to her ear, whispering huskily.

"Stop fighting this."

Her voice trembled. She felt her resolve slipping. "Fighting what?"

He slowly nibbled at her ear before he answered. She felt herself giving in again. She was always like this, losing control whenever Chuck was concerned.

"Us." He simply said.

And then he was kissing her. And she was responding with the same desperation and eagerness. She had missed him as much as he did her. And that pleased Chuck. She _cared _for him. _God, this felt so right._ He pulled her closer to him, completely closing whatever gap they had and she clung to him, desperately holding on to the moment.

When reality slammed her back to earth, that was when the moment ended.

She roughly pushed him away, fuming in anger. Why did he always have this effect on her?

"Leave me alone, Chuck! I don't want you!"

He smirked, challenging that statement. "Really? Didn't seem like it just now."

"Enough!"

The smirk wiped off immediately. She was being serious.

"I don't have time for this. I don't need you. I gave you a chance and you screwed me up!" Blair spat carelessly, ignoring the hurt that flashed in his eyes. "You are a liar. I hope you and your 'step sister' have fun with yourselves."

Chuck snapped back. "I did not sleep with Serena! How many times do you want me to say that?!"

"Zero." She said, deadpanned. "Because I don't want to hear anything from you or Serena ever again!"

"Blair, I'm trying – "

"Stop trying!" Blair interrupted, losing all control and pouring all her anger on him. "Whatever you do will never be enough because I will never believe you ev – "

She stopped mid-sentence.

Chuck wondered in the change of expression that overtook her features now. They held absolute fear. Confusion set him to think what made her suddenly like that. He had never seen that kind of expression on her beautiful face before.

Suddenly, she grasped her chest and gasped desperately for air.

Chuck's senses alarmed at once and he rushed to her side, trying to assist her.

She couldn't breathe. _Oh God. _No. No. No!

Blair willed it to stop. But everything was getting out of control and she was left gasping for air.

"Blair, what's wrong?" Worry etched his features and she wanted just push him away.

"Go – " She couldn't even say that she wanted him gone anymore.

She collapsed on the floor and Chuck caught her, horrified at the turn of events, and unceasing worry and alarm filling him. "Blair! What's wrong?" He kept repeating, feeling helpless. Knowing she wouldn't be able to answer right, he grabbed his phone and proceeded to dial 911.

Seeing what he was about to do, Blair fought whatever it is that overtook her weak body and slapped the phone from his hand, breaking it. "Leave me alone!" She finally managed to gasp out.

"No. I'm staying with you. Let me help you." He ignored his broken phone, though he temporarily marveled at her strength at a time like this, hovering over her.

To see Chuck Bass panicking before her was not something she had ever planned to do and she had to get control of the situation, no matter how much it would physically hurt her.

"I don't need your help!" She began taking slow deep breaths, calming both herself and Chuck. Thankfully, her shortness of breath didn't last for so long this time around. She didn't realize her heavy-weight tears and Chuck's trembling arms tightly wrapped around her until the silence enveloped them once again.

The overwhelming worry that overtook him was instantly replaced with relief as soon as he saw that she was beginning to breathe right again. _Shit. What the hell just happened? _

He waited patiently for her to speak, hoping she would be the one to explain things to him.

At Chuck's look, she lied flat out. "Asthma."

Chuck's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. _Since when? _She was perfectly healthy as far as he was concerned.

"Where's your breather?"

"Upstairs."

"I'll get it." He offered, about to stand up to set on with the task, when she pulled him back down, yelling,

"No!"

Chuck stared down at her inquisitively, knowing instantly that there was more to what she was saying. "I'll do it myself." Blair snapped, grilling him with a hard stare.

"I'll help you." He offered simply.

"Well I don't need your help, Chuck." She insisted. "I can do it by myself."

He ignored her. "What's really going on?"

_Shit. _And now, he would never stop bothering her. Whatever caught Chuck's attention, he'd never let go. He seriously had to go away. _Now. _

"Why don't you tell me?"

Chuck wanted to shake her. "What?"

"Why were you with Serena that night?" She asked expressionless.

Chuck backed down instantly, even if he knew she was completely changing the topic. "This isn't my secret to tell." He couldn't believe she was shifting tables like this.

Blair scoffed rudely. "Please. It's practically your forte to tell everyone's secrets without a care. So why should this one bother you?"

"Because it's different this time."

"How?" Blair challenged.

Chuck didn't respond, knowing he would reveal everything to her if he opened his mouth. If anything it should f-ing Serena to be the one being conflicted like this, not him. At his silence, Blair nodded as if in understanding.

"See?" She whispered, nonchalant. "You can't even tell me the real reason. How am I supposed trust you again?" His jaw twitched. She hit a nerve. Good.

She stood up slowly and he followed her action. He took hold of her arms, staring at her, wishing she'd see the truth written clearly in his eyes._ He loved her._

"I love you."

Blair almost fell apart at that. But she ignored her own feelings and proceeded with the never-ending brutal lies.

"I _don't._" She spat cruelly with all the 'honesty' she could muster up. "I hate you." Again, she ignored the hurt that flashed in his eyes. She tried to pretend she didn't care that she was ripping his heart with her lying words.

"I hate every single thing about you, Chuck Bass. And you wanna know why? Because you're worthless. Your best friend thinks so, your own father thinks so, even your mother died along the way." She knew she had overstepped the line the moment she mentioned his dead mother, but she couldn't make herself stop now. If she did, she'd break down before him and confess _everything_. And so she continued tactlessly, "You make everybody miserable that they don't want to even be near you. That's how _worthless _you are. You bring us all _misery._" His hands clenched and his jaw twitched hard. He swallowed the pain as he ate her words. But Blair willed herself not to flinch at the vulnerable eyes that faced her now. She was hurting him. She hated this. She wanted to take it all back...

_I love you too..._

But the act carried on. He kept on hurting, unable to speak as she continued with lashing out. "I was foolish for actually giving you a chance. I've realized that you're not human. And you can't love. You make me sad and I hate you!" She yelled. "And that's why you need to leave me alone. Because I'm tired of this and I don't need you at all."

With brutal finality, she turned away from him. The last shred of rejection she would present to him. She could literally feel Chuck's heart break as she crushed it completely with her pointy designer heels.

"You and I are over." She tried to control her voice, praying it wouldn't give her away. "Now get out."

Silence again. He never said anything, never made a sound. It felt like forever had just gone by.

And then, her elevator doors dinged again and he was gone.

Completely out of her life.

_Forever, this time._

Just like how she wanted it to be.

Yet the tears blurred her vision as they fell. Like her terrible daily spasms, the tears were uncontrollable.

She would never stop crying.

Because her heart broke when his did. That's what love has taught her all this time.

This was just right, she convinced herself. _Love shouldn't have to be selfish. _He deserved to love a healthy girl to spend the rest of his life with. It was just simply unfair on him to make him stay with her like this. The way he held that panicked, helpless look on his face awhile ago, all the more resolved her to take such drastic actions. No way was she letting him go through something like that again. He had no idea how she was when she was sick.

The clock was ticking and the hour glass was set to end. Her whole life was literally falling apart and she had no clue how to stop it.

And everybody… Everybody...

_How would goodbye be?_

Blair Waldorf was always protective of those she loved. And no matter what, she would not let them go through the burden of loving _her; _the sick, fragile, _dying_ bitch.

She'd rather cut them out of her life forever than make them shed a tear for her.

She wrapped her arms around herself.

Death was a lonesome road to walk onto.

Honestly, she wished it wasn't so.

* * *

A pillow slammed on his forehead from out of nowhere.

_Ow. What the hell?_

He turned, meeting a pair of extremely angry eyes directed towards him. He merely scowled and gave his sister an annoyed grunt.

"What is your problem?"

She crossed her arms defiantly. "Shouldn't I be asking _you _that question?"

He blinked widely in dramatic confusion. "I'm sorry." He bit out sarcastically. "I don't seem to know where you're coming from."

Jenny wanted to slam him on the door frame right then and there.

"Why did you break up with Serena?"

"And how did you know about that?"

She just gave him a look as if the answer was obvious, but when he stared back in an aggravated blank look, she sighed in exasperation and threw her hands up in the air.

"Gossip Girl. _Duh." _

Well yeah, maybe the answer was obvious enough.

But Dan shook that annoying fact off and glared at her. He wasn't in the mood to deal with the press right now.

"And how is this any of your business?"

Jenny didn't answer the question, instead ignored it. "How could you even think about doing such a thing at a time like this?! I thought you loved her, that she was the girl of your fantastical dreams or whatever."

"Yeah, well apparently I don't think I have enough energy anymore to love someone who doesn't even know how to tell the truth." Dan retorted bitterly.

Jenny wanted to grab a hammer and ram it up on his head. She yelled in absolute frustration.

"Ugh! For once in your life, could you just stop judging everyone?!"

Dan tried to retort, getting angrier by the minute but Jenny interrupted him, drowning his voice in her rant.

"You think that you're so different and so good?" She cruelly shoved in his face. "Well guess what Dan? You're just like everybody else!"

"How?!" Dan finally found the voice to yell back. "How am I like everybody else, huh?! Am I the one keeping secrets? Am I the one sleeping with my own family members and hurting my best friend? Am I the one hiding secrets from my friends, not to mention _family?!" _

He knew he hit a huge nerve when he saw her gulp deeply.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Jenny feigned innocence.

Dan scoffed. "Oh really? So you and dad aren't hiding anything at all? _Anything _whatsoever?"

Jenny shut her mouth and Dan laughed bitterly.

"See? That's why I broke up with Serena. I'm _so_ sick of all of this."

Jenny glared, hatred radiating from her piercing eyes. "You really have no idea what you're talking about."

"Then why don't you fill me in?" He paused, thinking for a moment. "Is this about Serena's secret? That she slept with Chuck? You can spare yourself. I already know about it."

Jenny blinked. "What?! Serena's with Chuck? Wait - No!"

"I see where this is going." Dan continued, his mind set to his own imaginary idea. "You were just trying to protect Serena, so that her little secret wouldn't reach me. Does dad know about this too?"

He obviously got it so wrong! This was so getting out of control. She didn't even know half the things he was talking about now! "What?! No! This isn't about Serena! I didn't know about her and Chuck! This is about Blair!"

Dan's eyes widened in mockery. "Oh. So now it's Blair? Who's she sleeping with these days? Back to Nate again while Nate's with _my _best friend?"

His phone rang and their fight was abruptly interrupted. Dan pulled out his phone and saw the caller ID. _Sarah. _

_Saved by the bell. _He thought sarcastically. He turned back to his sister and ignored the ringing for a minute. He'd call her back later.

"You know, I don't even care anymore. I'm done with them, all of them. I advise that you should too."

And with that, he walked out of his room.

Jenny stood, shocked and completely infuriated. No one ever walks out on her. Especially since it was just her brother she was talking to here.

"Where do you think you're going?!" She yelled furiously, storming out as well, following him.

"Away from this place, obviously." Dan threw from his shoulder as he continued to pace out of the Loft.

"We have school, you idiot!" Jenny screamed, not caring if she was acting like an emotionally wrecked girl.

"Well, I'll skip the morning classes! What is it to _you_?!" He stopped, infuriated beyond words as he turned back to Jenny, angry, serious eyes meeting hers. He'd never raised his voice on her, but he was just seriously sick of everything he'd had to go through with everyone. "You know, I thought we were a family. But since you've humiliated me countless times for your so-called friends and gay boyfriend, and seeing you and dad gang up on me for someone who's not even a part of _this _family, I'm just done caring." He shook his head despairingly, disappointment and conflict casting over his features. "I'm tired of all this crap. And so I'm moving on."

Jenny wanted to slap him as she stood silenced by his words. He so didn't get it!

"Dan! You don't underst – "

But he had slammed the door hard on her face.

And she had never felt more insulted in her whole life.

This was probably worse than what those Constance girls could ever come up with.

_God. That went well._

Then suddenly she remembered something Dan mentioned earlier and her alarm bells began drilling in her head.

She quickly grabbed her jacket and bag from the kitchen table and practically ran out of the Loft, heading for school.

She'd probably run the whole way if she had to. But then she thought the cab was a faster route to get there.

_Seriously._ How did things spin so out of control lately?

Jenny really, _really_ hated being so clueless and being the last in on the updates.

_Damn it._

* * *

This was, by far, the worst week of her entire life.

_Wait_. Didn't she say that about last week as well?

Serena VanderWoodsen roughly dropped her heavy school bag and books and she collapsed on a table in the study hall, burying her face in her hands, completely stressed and frustrated.

All week she'd been trying to get Blair's attention. She had been planning on telling Blair everything, if only that would make her now sort of ex-best friend listen to her. And she would've...

If only Blair would just stop to look at her. Or if only Serena could just catch up to her.

She could've sworn Blair wasn't ill at all with the pace she was working at. She'd hardly seen Blair all week, despite her trying to find the damn brunette. If she did see Blair, it would only be in the classes they were in together, and Blair was well protected from her Blair-minion of a clique, so Serena couldn't get to her there either. When she would go see Blair at her home, it was either she wasn't home, she just missed Blair or she was plainly not welcomed to come up anymore. Calling was simply not an option anymore as the 1 million times she's called, no answer had been given to her. Briefly, she wondered if Blair had changed her number or something.

Serena cursed and swore she'd rip out her best friend's hair out the moment she even caught a glimpse of her, clique group or not.

And Dan…well… She didn't want to dwell on thoughts of him. Right now, her energy was focused on Blair so that she wouldn't have to think about all the painful things she'd have to go through with Dan.

She would've fought, just like how she was fighting to get Blair's attention now but… that required confessing _everything._

And that simply was not an option when it came to Dan.

So yeah. Being a loner was such a drag. No Blair, no Dan… not even the girls or her own brothers.

_Yup. _The week seemed a lot worse because she had no one by her side anymore. And she was so unused to it.

Her phone rang, rudely crashing her back to her hell of a world. She clumsily brought it out, hoping that it would finally be Blair calling her.

Her eyes widened as stared at the caller ID, disbelief and shock coursing through her.

Nope, it wasn't Blair.

But… she couldn't help her heart flutter a little as she realized who it was calling her now. _Dan Humphrey. _

Why was he calling now? Did he want to talk? What would she say? Did he miss her as much as she missed him? _Oh my God. _

"Hey!" Serena greeted, relief and happiness emitting from her voice. "I'm so glad you called. So…what's up? Where are you?"

The voice which she expected to be the familiar, deep voice she loved was not the one that answered her on the phone.

"With me."

She froze. The cold beginning to crawl within her. _What the hell? _

"Georgina?"

The mocking sing-song voice echoed in her ears. "The one and only."

Serena was so sick of this! Wasn't she done trying to ruin her life already? "What the hell do you want now? Haven't you done enough already?!"

Georgina simply laughed on the phone. "Of course not, sweetie. We're not even halfway there yet!"

Serena just wanted to crawl back to her bed and cry. She was just so, so, _so_ sick of this. "What do you want from me?" She cried out.

"I just wanted to things to be what they were before. Before that night. Before things got so screwed up." Georgina spat in a harsh tone she rarely used with anybody. "But you had to just be such a _bitch _and stick up to your new life and friends. You hurt me. And now you're going to pay. All of you."

"Fine. Well you did your deed last weekend with great success. Congratulations. I'm a miserable loner now, with no friend or family and yet... I'm still not going to you. Guess it's still you who's lost. Face it, G." Serena gloated challengingly. It was like she was saying, 'no matter what happens to her, she'd never ever go back to the devil's psycho spawn that was Georgina Sparks'.

Georgina huffed on the phone, obviously affected. "Well, if that's the way you want to play, that's how we're going to play it."

"So what else are you gonna do now?" Serena dared bravado.

On the other line, Georgina contained the hurt that slashed her insides as Serena gloated. _Did the bitch really think she'd win?_

Smugly, she replied, "It's not what I'm going to do, sweetie. It's _who _I'm going to do it with."

"No." Serena scoffed, confident. She may be broken up with Dan but he'd never do anything like that. "I know Dan. He's too good."

"You sure about that?" Georgina challenged lightly, her voice dangerously playful once again. And then she just rudely hung up, leaving Serena hanging on the other line.

_No. _She couldn't have gotten to Dan. Dan wouldn't. But… they were broken up. And he was angry at her. And… _no. _No matter what, he'd never do anything like that. Especially with some girl he just met… who apparently earned his trust and was closer to him now more than she was.

_Fucking Georgina and her manipulative, schizophrenic ways._

She sat frozen on her seat. Everything from the outside world completely drifting away until the only image she could see was Georgina wrapped in the arms of _her _supposed lover, Dan.

Suddenly, she just wanted to vomit.

* * *

Meanwhile, on the other side of building, Blair Waldorf wasn't having such a good day either.

She could barely move her scrawny ass and all she wanted to do was go back home and rest in her soft, comfortable bed.

She thought she might be picking up a slight fever but she blatantly ignored it. Duty calls. And as newly reinstated Queen, she had to make appearances to everyone.

But now that that was completely wearing her down, she had to sneak off to the girl's bathroom and just catch a breath. Normally, she was fine during school days. She didn't understand why she was so sluggish today.

While the back her mind was trying to scream out that what she did to Chuck the night before was the reason why she was so sick because her actions were completely unforgivable and warranted some sort of apology, she ignored that screaming voice as well. She had already seen him a couple of times this morning but didn't linger for long as she practically ran in the other direction, trying to get away from him.

Her heart cried out for him. It broke every time she caught a glimpse of him. She ignored that too.

She was ignoring a lot of things lately.

Blair stared herself at the mirror and tried to see past the broken image reflecting before her.

How was she going to fix herself? She wondered. Would she even have the_ time_ to do so? Or was the damage too far along the way to ever be fixed again?

She obviously regretted cruelly hurting the man she loved but… it had to be done. There was no other way. He had to hurt now, then move on and then be happy… or _something..._

Tonight, the rehearsal dinner for the huge Bass wedding would take place.

And although none of them were feeling well for a wedding in a miserable time such as these past few weeks, this was one of the occasions where she could watch Chuck move on by grabbing the next thin socialite he sees in sight and getting it on with her. Granted, it wasn't the start of a blooming, healthy relationship, but it was a start in the road of forgetting whatever he had with her.

And that was what she wanted.

_Her last dying wish… or whatever…_

At least that's what she kept telling herself as she continued to stare down at her reflection before her.

The nausea suddenly hit her without warning. She almost fainted at the unusually strong impact it had on her today but she continued fighting it.

She stumbled in a cubicle and vomited all the contents of her stomach in the toilet bowl.

She almost yelped out in horror as she saw, along with the rotten contents of this morning's breakfast, blood floated with it.

_Lots of blood. _

_Oh God..._

She fought the rush of tears and quickly flushed the horrible contents of the toilet bowl. She leaned back on the cubicle's door and tried to take a breath.

_What was happening?_

Until now, she was still so confused. The reality hadn't completely set in yet and she wondered when that finality would be so.

She'd been wondering a lot these days.

Closing her eyes and desperately holding back tears, she tried to control her trembling hands. She was so…_afraid…_

She really felt horrible today…

With another alarming speed, another dose of sudden nausea hit her.

And the same routine happened.

_Oh my God. Help me…_

She didn't how long she was locked in that cubicle, but it felt like forever as she tried desperately to collect herself and contain her fear.

Finally, when she thought she would be okay for another two hours or so, she finally unlocked herself from the cubicle…

…only to come face to face with Penelope.

And the rest of her clique.

Blair almost fainted at the sight of them.

A tense silence ensued among the group.

Penelope was the first to speak, voicing out her curiosity.

"Did you just throw up in there?"

How the hell was she supposed to get out of this? _Oh God. Oh God. _She cursed, thinking fast.

Blair shut her eyes in mortified guilt and sighed tiredly. "You're right, girls. You caught me." She nodded in easy acceptance. "Yes, that was me. I'm just…not feeling so well, all day… The whole thing with Chuck is just…" She paused and gave another dramatic sigh.

"Aww…" The girls sympathetically cooed in unison, instantly understanding her 'situation'.

Penelope gave her a comforting pat on the back. "Gosh, Blair. We didn't know you'd be this affected about Chuck… You really liked him?"

"Of course, she liked him." Hazel stated in an obvious way. "Why do think she's sick like this now?"

Is yelled out, infuriated. "That Chuck should have a serious beating for doing this to you!"

Blair rolled her eyes. Of course, she didn't want them to do anything to Chuck. They didn't really know _everything.  
_

"It's fine. I'm over it…"

"Clearly not." Nelly Yuki interjected. "If you're getting sick in the middle of a school day."

"I guess I'm just not feeling well… that's all… you know, stressed with school and whatnot. But I swear I'm fine now." She tried express nonchalance. "It's not Chuck's fault…"

"Of course it is!" Hazel enforced. "The guy is causing you to so much pain! He should definitely pay. Ugh. The nerve. Who does he think he is? And Serena? She's totally off my radar now."

"We'll bring you to the clinic." Penelope offered.

Blair shook her head, declining the offer. "Really, girls. That's really nice but –"

"But nothing!" Isabel reprimanded. "You're so obviously not fine. We're going to make sure you get better. You're Queen. Queens don't topple down because of useless men."

"Especially if that man is named Chuck Bass!" Hazel added.

"I know what it is you're going through." Nelly said in a soft voice. "But it's not worth it. Guys like those are not worth it. You made me see that, Blair."

Blair almost cringed at the memory, but she just gave a tight smile in reply.

"_We _understand. Guys are jerks. And Chuck Bass is not an exception." Penelope stated wisely. "Let us help you."

And Blair found herself caught up as she gazed at the hopeful, sympathetic looks of her girlfriends. She sighed in relief. At least, there were actually people she could count on in desperate Serena-less times such as today. Who knew right?

She mustered a grateful smile and stuttered a "Thanks", overwhelmed by their concern. It was a rare and an odd occurrence.

With that, they all assisted Blair to the nurses' wing.

_Phew. _She saved herself. God, that was close.

And since she wasn't truly feeling well, she thought this whole trip to the clinic was actually quite useful. She could get some shut-eye for a few hours before she headed back to her strenuous classes.

On their way to the clinic, they passed by a skulking Chuck leaning on the brick school walls and Blair had to warn them once again to not do anything rash for now.

They settled with a glare but Chuck ignored them, his gaze completely focused on Blair. She merely gave him a short apologetic look for her friends' actions, before she completely avoided his eyes, not wanting to dwell in them any further.

They were done. Over. It had to stay that way now.

And once again, the girls were all over her, comforting her and totally on her side.

She just rolled her eyes and sighed in relief, glad to be away from his imposing presence.

It was great to not feel so alone that much anymore.

Because after last night's events, she had no idea how she was ever going to face him ever again.

* * *

_Lunch_

On the courtyard, their paths finally crossed as they bumped into each other roughly.

"Oh, I'm so sor – " Dan stopped abruptly as he realized who it was he bumped into. _Great._ He already skipped his morning classes and the first person he sees is her. He avoided her clear blue eyes as she shifted before him. "I'm sorry." He completed the statement. He did bump into her after all.

Serena crossed her arms and gave him a hard look. "For what? Bumping into me? Or something else?"

Dan blinked confused. "What are you - ?" Then it clicked. "Oh you mean Sarah. How'd you - ? Never mind."

Serena tried to warn him. "Look I know we're broken up and all. But she's just not who you think she is."

Dan stared back at her as if she were crazy. "And how do you know all this? Wait. Wait. Don't answer that." He held up a hand. "I'm sure you can't tell me that either."

"I really can't!" Serena replied, desperate. "Just trust me."

Dan eyes mocked her. "Trust _you? _You who has done nothing but lie to me?"

Serena shook her head, lowering her voice. "Dan…"

"See, it can never just be a simple answer with you. At least with Sarah, I can get a little honesty coming from her."

Serena's suddenly cold eyes pierced his and he almost flinched. "You don't even know anything about who she really is, Dan, not one clue. So I suggest you go figure it out on your own. I just hope you don't regret it in the long run."

"What?" Dan had to shake his head, wondering if he was hearing wrong. "You've been sleeping with Chuck behind my back, partying and lying and now you're accusing Sarah, someone you just met briefly a couple of weeks ago?" He sighed, exasperated. He seriously didn't sign up for this. "I don't understand that at all! And just so you know, we're broken up so I don't really think this is any of your business anymore."

Serena just shook her head as well, the hurt coursing within her. How the hell could he defend that lying Georgina? So he didn't know who the hell she really was but… _still. _Why didn't he seem to know her at all?!"I don't have time for this." She said simply before she flipped her hair and turned away from him, leaving him deflated and completely insulted.

"Yeah well, neither do I." He retorted to her retreating figure before he turned the other way. As he made his way back inside the campus, he wasn't completely focusing on his path, hence colliding with another person he didn't exactly wish to see that moment.

"Blair. Sorry about that."

She just scowled at him and carried on walking as he was just a mere speck of dust. He rolled his eyes at her rude figure before he finally made a complete exit.

Blair, meanwhile, strolled in as if she owned the place, trying to find the girls before she was rudely whirled around by a frantic Jenny.

"Blair! Are you okay?"

Blair's eyebrows rose, silently asking for an explanation. Did everybody hear about her horrible illness this morning? Damn Gossip Girl must die. The clinic gave her a few useless aspirins and let her sleep for a minute but truthfully, she wasn't feeling the slightest bit well but it was lunch and maybe if she had a little nutrition in her system again, then she could feel a little better.

"I heard about the whole Chuck and Serena thing."

Blair groaned.

Jenny grasped her arms desperately. "Look, whatever happened, it's not true. When you two first broke up, I went to Chuck and pleaded him to talk to you."

Blair's eyes widened in horror. "You did what?!"

"I didn't tell him anything!" Jenny rushed. "But I told him that you love him and clearly you're meant to be with each other and all that…"

Blair was furious but she was slightly relived that this confirmed that Georgina's story was an absolute lie. But still, she was furious. How dare Jenny Humphrey do things behind her back? "You had no right to do that." She walked away then, dismissing Jenny. She just ran after her, trying to explain.

Everything was going so out of control.

"Blair, just listen – "

But again she was interrupted as her minions appeared out of nowhere with Penelope leading the way.

"So I see you've become such a low life that you're resorted to harassing Blair."

The girls gathered around Blair, protectively hovering over their Queen.

Penelope continued to talk down against Jenny.

"Just because we're ignoring you, doesn't mean we've forgotten. And ruining Blair's day even more like this, doesn't seem to make you any brighter in our eyes."

Blair watched the exchange happening before her. Seriously, she did not give them enough credit at all. Her army could be ruthless when they wanted to be.

"I was just trying to help." Jenny replied in a small voice.

Perhaps this was a moment to interject. "Penelope, that's enough. We needn't concern ourselves anymore with her. Jenny was just asking me for a favor."

"And highly does she think she is to ask of you for anything." Isabel spat as she glared at Jenny.

"Like I said, it's fine. Let's go." Blair commanded. They let it go, following their Queen's actions and as they turned they all face to face with the forgotten Queen, Serena.

Blair was getting a headache with all these clashing with people.

This school was seriously too small for her liking.

"Blair, I've been trying to reach you all week. Where have you been? I need to talk to you." Serena pleaded.

Blair managed a glare. She really wasn't feeling well to deal with any of this Serena crap right now. Couldn't she see that?

Blair rolled her eyes, answering her own question. _Apparently not._

Noticing Blair's distressed expression, Penelope brought out her guns once again and directed them towards the blonde ex-Queen.

"Don't you understand the idea that when the person you're trying to reach isn't responding, means that they don't want to anything to do with you anymore?" Penelope icily dripped.

Serena immediately got incensed. Since when did these girls truly have Blair's back?

"Oh I'm sorry. I didn't realize you knew anything else other than the styling hair products that could benefit you," Serena gave a flippant smirk. "And even that seems to be such a failure on you."

Blair fought the growing headache throbbing within her. "Stop it." She directed her question to Serena. "What are you even doing here?"

"That's right, S. Here is a place where you don't belong." Penelope spat menacingly, not letting the blonde even speak, defending her pride. "_I_ may not know much but at least I know not to have secret relationships with my best friend's boyfriend, S. I knew right from the start that you would do something like this. It's what you are, what you perceive to people."

"What?" Serena blinked. "Please. The hypocrisy is suffocating me."

"Maybe." Hazel quipped. "But some _friend _you are, really. How low could you get?"

And suddenly they were all arguing, bitching out at each other and Blair's headache spun out of control as their argument did.

Her vision began to blur and everything began spinning and spinning and spinning. The people around her became swirling, frightening images. She couldn't make them out anymore.

Jenny lingered behind watching the exchange, her eye focused on Blair. When she saw her beginning to stagger groggily, Jenny's alarms rang once again, bleeding her ears. She tried to stop the argument happening between the girls and Serena but no one would listen to her. Nelly Yuki cast a forlorn glance to her direction but that was it.

In Blair's head, everyone was drowning out, slowly and painfully. Everyone's noise clashed and meshed with her head, screaming in her ears.

She wished Chuck was around, wished a glimpse of red would drift somewhere in her swirling vision. That way she'd know he was there… still there…

No sign of red. Not that she fathom that out anymore. The noise kept bleeding her ear, driving her insane and everyone was still spinning and suddenly…

"Enough!"

She screamed out, tired, annoyed, exasperated…

…And then, she _fainted. _

All forms of motion seemed to stop for a full minute before it began to register in their brains what had just transpired.

Someone screamed.

And then the chaos ensued.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay so that's it for this week.

Read and review please. :) haha.

And yes, I know, I kind of screwed up the entire timeline. But haha, lol. Alot's just squeezed in between Woman on the Verge and Much I do About Nothing haha.

By the way, Lady GaGa is amazing.

Dl her album, _The Fame. _I recommend it to you all. It's great. Some songs are from the GG soundtrack.

I want to go attend a show during Fashion Week. Wee. haha. Lol.

That's all.

Reviews are love. Thanks! :)


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